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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I just need to write this out, please don't feel you must reply.
I am going through the menopause, have been for a few years following a hysterectomy 5 years ago. I have started estrogen gel HRT for past few months and it has helped many of my symptoms. I am already looking forward to my review next month with my GP to discuss dosage, staying on this treatment etc as I need their support.
For a few days now I have felt so many emotions and cant always understand or pinpoint what I am feeling other than tired, stressed, anxious, afraid, vulnerable, confused, irrational, jealous. I feel old, unattractive, past my sell by date and overweight.
My work is very busy and causing me some of the stress increase but my tolerance and patience is very fragile.
I am a keen runner and this morning I was crying during my run, I needed to momentarily be physically held by my boyfriend before I could gather my mental strength to run up a very steep hill.... I made it through my run but it was an extremely tough mental challenge for me. I so wanted to stop, to walk, to say "oh fuck it" and have a diva moment but I didn't, I pushed through it.
This afternoon I snapped at my teenage son and I overreacted to something he had done. I have since apologised for being a 'Menopausal Margaret' and he shrugged it off and said it's fine.... I now have guilt and so I took myself off to the garden in the rain and sat on a chair under an umbrella until my boyfriend came to call me indoors. I just needed fresh air in my lungs.
I am just so thankful to my boyfriend for picking me up...quite literally when I am down.
I know it was Menopause Awareness the other day and it's great to see this being communicated to everyone.
I can't put my finger on how I feel from one moment to the next but please stick with people like me, please know we are struggling sometimes and feel all out of sorts but we will get through it.
I need a hug so much right now and am bloody crying as I type this... silly cow that I am. But more than anything I want to smile and laugh and have fun
Thank you for reading this... you deserve a medal
Her xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Awe I’m so sorry your going through a tough time. Sounds like you have the support of a good man which is lovely to hear. This is something I’m terrified to go through. I’ve not had anyone around me close enough to know what to expect, only what I hear from some people I know and what’s been in the media. Hopefully the HRT will help to stabilise your emotions. Sending a virtual hug |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I read all the way through first of sending you the biggest virtual hug secondly I'm also menopausal it's a bitch talking helps and so does the crying I'm on a very very mild dose of vanaflaxitine. It sounds like you have a very supportive boyfriend so that's good xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I call it
" the 2nd puberty" we all have different things happening.
Keep talking honey to your other half and on here as you have done.
Tell your GP everything youve said here.
Keep Strong
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I'm really sorry you're struggling. I remember my mum experiencing it and she went really weird. Anxious and paranoid which is out of character for her. She's out the other side now though and much better. She found using a progesterone cream really helped. |
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Many many hugs/cwtches to you, as others have said, tell your doc, your boyfriend sounds like an ace and supportive guy and maybe sit your children down and explain the menopause, when and if you think it's appropriate. Following my own physical changes, my son had to find out a lot more about his mum (like helping me on/off the loo) than average. You feel guilty at the time, but love is love and your kids will understand. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Aww big hugs, I know exactly what you mean. I’m menopausal and am on HRT to help. But I still get days where I go through everything you’ve described, plus absolute tiredness. My gp said it’s normal and not to beat myself up about it. Just have to take each day as it comes, and know there will be an end to this x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I read your post.
I’m not sure what to say.
Please don’t shout at me.
I hope the stuff passes soon and you feel more yourself again.
Here’s a clover for luck |
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By *linyMan
over a year ago
Manchester/London |
You are awesome and let no one tell you any different. You have achieved soo much to feel proud of such as your son. He knows you are not you’re usual self sometimes and is there to support you along with your boyfriend. It’s another hardship you ladies have to face in life and with the help of your GP and therapeutic HRT you will emerge a stronger, braver and sexier woman than ever!
We’re here supporting you (from a distance of course )
MAHOOSIVE hugs to you x |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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We don't deserve a medal for reading that, you do for being so open and honest about it all. Sending you a massive hug OP, I hope you get the help you deserve and things are better for you soon, x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Och lovely, sending hugs....I'm not far behind you I reckon though for now my symptoms seem to be purely physical, though Mr may say differently regarding moods. I go to bed mostly with a hot water bottle and sleep it off.
Be kind to yourself xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sending big hugs OP as I know what that's like.
I was put through an early menopause after having breast cancer in my late thirties and the emotional roller coaster is so hard as it's one minute your happy and the next crying your eyes out or getting annoyed at the slightest thing.
Unfortunately I could not have hrt as it was estrogen which fed the cancer.m but I got through it so just take each day as it comes.
If you ever what a chat then please message me x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you so much to everyone who has replied, its lifted my spirits so much and given me a smile on my face too...
Huge hugs in return to every single one of you.
Her x |
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That’s your hormone levels changing, they do in laters years as your system says goodbye to your reproductive system. Your Oestrogen levels drop which normally support your skin structure, bone density and hair.
It’s a bugger of a time but so long as you know what’s happening and why you can try to embrace it as best you can
There are lots of online videoed explaining the changes your system goes through |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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With the emotions I've been feeling recently, all out of my control, I couldn't imagine what the prolonged chemical version of this would feel like. I'm glad you have someone there for you and hope sharing this has helped x |
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By *-sas-sinWoman
over a year ago
Arse end of the universe |
I'm glad you wrote this, my friend suffered severe depression during the menopause, and very nearly got sectioned for her own safety. It's a tough time and shes now on the other side but has often said it feels like you are literally losing your marbles. So huge hugs to you, it wont last forever, so keep on keeping on xxx |
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Hormones have a hell of a lot to answer for.
You sound like you're a very strong lady, and you will get through this. You also sound like you have an amazing boyfriend and an understanding son.
Keep on plodding on, ensure your doctor listens to you, and ensure you keep telling your family how you're feeling.
Hope your hormones settle down and tu feel more like your normal self too.
PS, you're not a silly cow and there is nothing wrong with crying.
Take care. |
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