When drilling upwards (into a ceiling, or window recess, etc) get an aerosol lid, make a small hole in the top of it, turn it upside down and slide it down the drill bit.

Then it will catch 99% of the dust.... making less mess, and it won’t get the electric drill full of brick dust either

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Never put a chicken in the freezer just before you go to bed because it will be dead in the morning

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

If you want to know the time,call into a jeweller's shop,buy a watch....

most modern tills have the time printed on the receipt...Sorted.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you stay ready, you ain't gotta get ready

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By *ikeC81Man over a year ago

harrow

When cutting turf fold over and run knife across fold

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By *utterflyandArtificeCouple over a year ago

Trowbridge

Thicken runny low fat yoghurts by stirring in a lump of lard.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

When admiring a beautiful house full of beautiful people, don't be jealous of them. You have a beautiful view but they have to suffer your fuck ugly face.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Save money by not buying a new vibrator, just fill an old cigar tube full of angry wasps and make sure you screw the lid on tight!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Avoid your horse getting fat by feeding him 'sweetex' instead of sugar lumps.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

if you see a sign on a tree saying

"Have you seen my cat"?

or "Have you seen my dog"?..

do the polite thing ring them up and say 'no sorry I haven't'

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By * Sophie xTV/TS over a year ago

Derby

If you're going to drink and drive, don't forget to take your car with you

This is a joke by the way so dont get your knickers or jockstraps in a twist

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Cats can be very expensive,what with vets bills and food ...

Save money by not having a cat,and slashing your furniture with a Stanley knife

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

First rule of holes. Stop digging

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

To prevent getting wet when it's raining, stay indoors

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Charge your phone battery quickly by putting it in the microwave for 30 seconds

It works!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Clean silver with toothpaste on a damp cloth..

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Elderly drivers..

pressing the the pedal on Your right makes the car go a little faster: driving at 15 miles per hour will not suffocate you ,it was all a myth

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Clean mildew from bathrooms with Vodka.....50% vodka 50% water mix

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

In a cinema,Turn your hoodie back to front to hold your popcorn in the hood

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By *1singleguyMan over a year ago

clayton

Beat the hangover. Stay d*unk!

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By *oxychicWoman over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

"To clean your microwave,heat a bowl of water -on for 5 mins.

The steam will loosen the inside of the microwave "
try cutting a lemon in half n stick it in the water

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

"In a cinema,Turn your hoodie back to front to hold your popcorn in the hood"

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By *ensual 2Couple over a year ago

Blackpool

Never eat yellow snow

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By *aomilatteCouple over a year ago

Midlands

To increase your chances of a reply don't send a cock photo

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

If you need reading glasses from Specsavers,don't forget the small print

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

If going into a b&q store,when you spot a member of staff..punch him hard enough to knock him out...

If not .. he's likely to come up to you and ask you if you want decking.

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