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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth had no form. It was empty, covered with darkness and water. Then the Spirit of God hovered over the water, and God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good.
Then He divided the light from the darkness. God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And the evening and the morning were the first day.
Then God said, “Let there be a great expanse of air to divide the waters below from the waters above.”
And God called the expanse “heaven.” And the evening and the morning were the second day.
Then God said, “Let the water under the heaven be gathered together in one place, and let the dry land appear,” and it happened.
And God called the dry land “earth”; and the gathering together of the waters He called “seas”: and God saw that it was good. Then God said, “Let the earth produce grass, and herbs, and fruit trees, all yielding after their own kind,” and it happened; And God saw that it was good. And the evening and the morning were the third day.
Then God said, “Let there be lights in the heavens; and let them be for signs and seasons, and for days, and years.” God made two great lights; the sun to rule by day and the moon to rule by night. He also made the stars.
And He set them all in the heavens to give light upon the earth; And God saw that it was good. And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
Then God said, “Let the waters abound with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth.” So God created great whales and everything that moves in the water, and winged animals—all these producing after their kinds; and God saw that it was good. And He blessed them, saying, “Be fruitful, and multiply.” And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
Then God said, “Let the earth be filled with living creatures.” So He made the animals on the earth, the cattle, and every thing that crawls upon the earth—all producing after their kinds; and God saw that it was good.
Then God said, “Let us make man in Our image, after Our likeness.” And the Lord God formed man out of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.
So God created man in His own image; and He created them male and female. God named the first man Adam; then later Adam called the woman, Eve.
And God said, “A man shall leave his father and his mother and cling to his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked, and were not ashamed.”
And God saw everything that He had made, and it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.
The heavens and the earth were finished, so on the seventh day God ended his work, tired, hungry and in need of a beer.
But God stayed a little too long at the Heavenly Watering Hole as, on the evening of the 7th day, he turned up at Adam and Eve's gaff feeling like he really needed a good hard shag after all that work, knocked on the door and said "Adam, fancy a 3some Matey????????"
... and so God created .... Swinging
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