FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What has being on fabswingers done for your love life ?
What has being on fabswingers done for your love life ?
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For me it was good when i split up but really long time being on here 'swinging' prob not the best thing mentally . Playing with other mens wives is fun without doubt but when dating for a relationship it didnt do me well you could say .
Last couple yrs as a single guy ive realised i missed waking up with a woman rather than popping round for an hour or two for a naughty couple hours .
Popping in n out of here nowadays once or twice a day i think is much healthier for me .
But...... now dating a Romanian lady who wants a threesome and suggested a swingers club in brussels lol ....this is without me saying i was on fabs !!
How the world of dating is changing eh  |
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It has served its purpose for me as an amazing way to make so many new and amazing friends as that is the hardest thing to do when you get older.
It wasnt fab that changed my perspective but lonely family events like my little brothers wedding last weekend you realise no matter how many friends you have ultimately you are still alone and thats hard at times which is why i opened myself up again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fab has done wonders for both of us. Was on here as singles, met through a dating thread nearly five years ago and been married for just over two years, so you could say fab changed our lives! Not to mention I have made some wonderful, non fucking friends from here too lol.
Danish x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For my sexual appetite it helps. I do enjoy being on my own but sometimes, especially with recent events I do wish I had someone to come home to.
I know however the normal vanilla life is not for me. Perhaps one day I'll find the Devil I seek that I can call home |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m not entirely sure how to answer this, but I’ll give it a good shot.
So far swinging has been fairly liberating for me. I’ve made some wonderful friends who I really care about and had some magical experiences. It’s also opened my eyes a lot to how other people see me. In my mind I’ve always been that awkward teenage girl who was all limbs, a weird goth that frankly looked like Tim Burton had drawn her. I’m finally coming around to the idea that I’m not that little girl anymore and that I do have some level of beauty about me that I never realised was there. I still struggle to see it, but having a tiny glimpse of seeing myself through the eyes of others has taught me to be more confident in not only my body but in myself as well.
On the other side of things though swinging has made me realise I’m very lonely. I spend a great deal of my life looking after everyone else. I’m in control of everything and spend all my time being the strong rock that doesn’t move no matter how the waves crash. I never think or take the time to consider what I need or want out of any situation, always considering other people’s happiness and needs first, even when it’s suffocating me. I’m too busy to look at myself and ask what it is I need to be happy long term.
Being someone’s complete priority, if only for a little while, takes a huge edge off a pain I didn’t realise was there. I’m starting to question whither I need something in my life that makes me feel safe enough to be vulnerable. I didn’t realise I had built so many walls around myself, and this huge capacity I have to care seems to be bursting out through the cracks.
If that means in the long term I’m more poly than monogamous then that’s something I need to explore. Thankfully I have a best friend and partner who is 100% behind me and is happy for me to take the time to figure out what I need to do to figure this out.
So yeah, swinging has effected my love life. It’s both improved it, opened new ideas to me and forced me to consider my own needs more than I think I have ever done before. |
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits 
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe   "
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though! "
Where in Wales? xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though! "
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx |
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Where in Wales? xx"
I'm from a tiny place called Llangernyw  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Where in Wales? xx
I'm from a tiny place called Llangernyw "
I’ve heard of it xx |
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx"
I can totally relate to the being the rock for others at the expense of yourself and the realisation that, despite being the chubby geek at school, I might actually be attractive to more than one person on earth. Plus various other things. I'm a bottler upperer too, and it comes out sporadically, which isn't always good |
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Where in Wales? xx
I'm from a tiny place called Llangernyw
I’ve heard of it xx"
It has a famous yew tree  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx
I can totally relate to the being the rock for others at the expense of yourself and the realisation that, despite being the chubby geek at school, I might actually be attractive to more than one person on earth. Plus various other things. I'm a bottler upperer too, and it comes out sporadically, which isn't always good "
I’ll always bottle up. Always have and always will I think. I’ve never actually been in a position to allow myself actual, real vulnerability. Although I wear my heart on my sleeve and show everything in my eyes, I’m also a damn good actress and will hold the universe in to protect everyone else 
I’m totally going to die of a heart attack one day |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Where in Wales? xx
I'm from a tiny place called Llangernyw
I’ve heard of it xx
It has a famous yew tree "
Ah yes, I’d forgotten about that xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx
I can totally relate to the being the rock for others at the expense of yourself and the realisation that, despite being the chubby geek at school, I might actually be attractive to more than one person on earth. Plus various other things. I'm a bottler upperer too, and it comes out sporadically, which isn't always good
I’ll always bottle up. Always have and always will I think. I’ve never actually been in a position to allow myself actual, real vulnerability. Although I wear my heart on my sleeve and show everything in my eyes, I’m also a damn good actress and will hold the universe in to protect everyone else
I’m totally going to die of a heart attack one day "
Nooo, don’t be a bottler upper xxx |
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx
I can totally relate to the being the rock for others at the expense of yourself and the realisation that, despite being the chubby geek at school, I might actually be attractive to more than one person on earth. Plus various other things. I'm a bottler upperer too, and it comes out sporadically, which isn't always good
I’ll always bottle up. Always have and always will I think. I’ve never actually been in a position to allow myself actual, real vulnerability. Although I wear my heart on my sleeve and show everything in my eyes, I’m also a damn good actress and will hold the universe in to protect everyone else
I’m totally going to die of a heart attack one day "
I really only "come out" to S or cert trusted work colleagues. The rest of the time, I don my rhinoceros hide and take on the world singlehandedly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx
I can totally relate to the being the rock for others at the expense of yourself and the realisation that, despite being the chubby geek at school, I might actually be attractive to more than one person on earth. Plus various other things. I'm a bottler upperer too, and it comes out sporadically, which isn't always good
I’ll always bottle up. Always have and always will I think. I’ve never actually been in a position to allow myself actual, real vulnerability. Although I wear my heart on my sleeve and show everything in my eyes, I’m also a damn good actress and will hold the universe in to protect everyone else
I’m totally going to die of a heart attack one day
I really only "come out" to S or cert trusted work colleagues. The rest of the time, I don my rhinoceros hide and take on the world singlehandedly "
You’re a warrior!  xx
|
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"Cats, are you secretly me?! I share many of your traits
If you’re a Scottish red-head then maybe
Ummm. Nope. I'm originally Welsh but now non-descript northern light brownish sort. Still many similarities though!
Even writing that post made me feel pretty vulnerable. I’m doing a lot of bottling up lately, so it’s freeing even to admit some of those feels.
If you’re dealing with some of the same things then you go you! It’s not easy, the good ones or the difficult ones. Xx
I can totally relate to the being the rock for others at the expense of yourself and the realisation that, despite being the chubby geek at school, I might actually be attractive to more than one person on earth. Plus various other things. I'm a bottler upperer too, and it comes out sporadically, which isn't always good
I’ll always bottle up. Always have and always will I think. I’ve never actually been in a position to allow myself actual, real vulnerability. Although I wear my heart on my sleeve and show everything in my eyes, I’m also a damn good actress and will hold the universe in to protect everyone else
I’m totally going to die of a heart attack one day
I really only "come out" to S or cert trusted work colleagues. The rest of the time, I don my rhinoceros hide and take on the world singlehandedly
You’re a warrior! xx
"
So are you, Madam |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It has definitely been an eye opener , Absolutely so..the sexual appetite and attitude of ladies here ,and particularly one in particular... really opened my eyes to so much of what l was missing all my life .. |
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By *avtwoCouple
over a year ago
fort worth |
As a wife with a busy hubby, fab brings me lots of great masturbation material and some very sexy chats. Even more fun when I can tell him after all the dirtiness that was talked about. |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
To be honest it's probably made me realise that what I'm looking for isn't really out there and that maybe I need to re-evaluate what I want.
I was suggested this site by a friend as an alternative to 'normal' dating sites to find men more in sync with me but might be time to move on from that pipe dream  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be honest it's probably made me realise that what I'm looking for isn't really out there and that maybe I need to re-evaluate what I want.
I was suggested this site by a friend as an alternative to 'normal' dating sites to find men more in sync with me but might be time to move on from that pipe dream "
I'll have a look myself in a min, but does your profile reflect what you're looking for?
I reckon you could find a man in sync with you on Fab, though probably the vast majority do just want the leg over. There are all types of people looking for lots of different things on Fab so I wouldn't rule it out entirely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m really finding this hard to answer. I first came to fab many years ago as a swinger who was mainly looking for bi encounters. Years later I realised I found the swinging left me feeling empty. I started to look down the poly route and knew that’s what suited me. I needed love as much as I needed sex. Where I’m at now is a little bit of limbo, I thought I had maybe found it again but not so sure. I’m in two minds whether to take a total break from it all. |
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"I’m really finding this hard to answer. I first came to fab many years ago as a swinger who was mainly looking for bi encounters. Years later I realised I found the swinging left me feeling empty. I started to look down the poly route and knew that’s what suited me. I needed love as much as I needed sex. Where I’m at now is a little bit of limbo, I thought I had maybe found it again but not so sure. I’m in two minds whether to take a total break from it all. "
Yes iv been like that for past year or so . Had amazing time at start . Wanted to meet bi girls for a threesome , made some great friends on here but seeing happy couples doing normal things makes me think a bit more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think cats has not the nail on the head, fab highlights a vulnerability in people that was probably hiding in the background.
It has helped end my love life by contributing to the end of a relationship but that's because of an impulsive sex drive due to mental illness, once I found fab I couldn't help myself especially at a low point in my life when things had got a grip. That impulsiveness makes you feel great at the time but then afterwards creates that emptiness, as you find out you are alone, are you being used?, Are you just using people for your own satisfaction? Which come on the majority of people on here are.
I'm pretty sure alot of people feel that emptiness and I have a bit of a theory that there are a lot of vulnerable people on here that have had problems in there life causing them to seek reassurance through others sexually etc but then also feel the after effects. Is this place real or is this just fantasy that now and again becomes real for that moment you meet? |
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Fab has found me Alice.
And given me a new found love life
Madhatter 
Fab has found me Madhatter.
And given me the best thing that has ever happened to me sexually and romantically..... well everything... except my kids of course
Alice x |
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A few years ago I joined Fab for the first time and it did lead to some interesting sexual encounters. It was fun while it lasted, had a good 3 year stint but felt the need to leave because I found that it was consuming all my time.
Found a girlfriend a few months later but things turned sour a few months into our relationship when I told her about my Fab past. She found it disgusting and we split up.
I didnt suggest for one minute that we introduce anyone in our relationship but she found my past sickening. So we split
Been single ever since and found myself back on Fab.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love life?
Nothing. Actually, seeing the way some "single" men on here (who aren't actually single) sneak around behind their partner's back, wanting to swap their partner's photos when they seem to be completely unsuspecting and just being completely disrespectful towards them has made me want to remain single even more.
Sex life?
In the past two years it's improved immensely. I have a meet who I can explore every part of myself with, mentally, emotionally and physically, and that's just amazing. |
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"has made me come to terms with the likelihood of me having one again is very slim indeed.
Humans are pricks.
Oh Peach . Why do you think that??
You are an amazing woman xx"
I may have a sex life again, but a love life is highly doubtful.
Too many people have too much baggage.
Scars
Triggers
Liars
Cheats
To find someone who truly understood my mind would need to be someone who had been there. 2 of those people together walking a tightrope of mental health issues would be a dangerous combo I feel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Seriously given me and my lass of 17 years a total new outlook on our relationship. We’ve become way more open and honest on what we both like and want to try. We would never usually talk about it but when my mrs went with another lad I told her it really turned me on, now she tells me all about it when we’re fucking and are now looking for a fuck buddy for her. She’s my hot wife and I love her very much. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sweet fuck all
If anything, it's making me not want to message anyone, even if I like them, because I don't see it as being worth the effort if I don't get a reply or have to carry the conversation. I'm just a bit tired of it all |
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"Sweet fuck all
If anything, it's making me not want to message anyone, even if I like them, because I don't see it as being worth the effort if I don't get a reply or have to carry the conversation. I'm just a bit tired of it all "
 many guys can relate to this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Absolutely nothing I'm lucky to get a reply with anyone close by and I like the look off I have now made the decision of just being on forums and chatting as I know I won't get a meet |
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By *ab jamesMan
over a year ago
ribble valley |
When I started on fab(a few years ago). I used to send boring messages. Every girl must get a hundred of these. Try something different. Grab thier attention, say something stupid but nice, make sure she'll never have had a message like it! I (proudly) recently sent a certain lady of the forums, a message. She replied, she'd never seen anything like it! But we're talking
The key is to make the receiver smile. Not shudder! This approach will at least get a lot more read messages, and hopefully meets
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So far nothing.
Lots of frustration and questions if it was the right thing. I fear we joined at the wrong time as pandemic hit. But not a lot of interest unfortunately |
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Fornus opened our eyes and made us realise what we both like and what we don't but for myself it's made me realise just how adventureus other woman can be and given me something to aim for and try to bring out of myself as even though I enjoy the site I find it at times very intimidating and feel self conscious of my ability sexuslly and also my figure, but over time that will come I'm not rushing just browsing and when the time is right we will dable again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me it was good when i split up but really long time being on here 'swinging' prob not the best thing mentally . Playing with other mens wives is fun without doubt but when dating for a relationship it didnt do me well you could say .
Last couple yrs as a single guy ive realised i missed waking up with a woman rather than popping round for an hour or two for a naughty couple hours .
Popping in n out of here nowadays once or twice a day i think is much healthier for me .
But...... now dating a Romanian lady who wants a threesome and suggested a swingers club in brussels lol ....this is without me saying i was on fabs !!
How the world of dating is changing eh "
It’s made me realise I want an open relationship, that one person i trust and have as my base but we enjoy threesomes and play with others with a clear set of guidelines (ie practise safe and maybe there is one thing only we do together)
I think I MIGHT have found that person, he’s not on fab, but knows I am and is massively turned on by it - but I’m not sure how to have “the chat” with him! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me it was good when i split up but really long time being on here 'swinging' prob not the best thing mentally . Playing with other mens wives is fun without doubt but when dating for a relationship it didnt do me well you could say .
Last couple yrs as a single guy ive realised i missed waking up with a woman rather than popping round for an hour or two for a naughty couple hours .
Popping in n out of here nowadays once or twice a day i think is much healthier for me .
But...... now dating a Romanian lady who wants a threesome and suggested a swingers club in brussels lol ....this is without me saying i was on fabs !!
How the world of dating is changing eh "
100% ++++
Swinging is a funny thing...... When I have decided to take a break and enjoy the vanilla dating world... I noticed couples and single women tend to show much more interest in me...
One other thing I have noticed..... when I’m dating in the vanilla world... I have less patience with my relationships... the first sign of trouble and I will run away.... this is because I have had swinging to fall back on for my sexual needs....
I had to take a hard look at myself and decide that I didn’t want to end up a lonely old man... So now I come on swinging sites for a good laugh.....
I’m not sure if this is going on in the UK but in the USA a lot of couples have started a only fans page and basically looking to shoot porn under the guise of swinging....
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
Not much for the love life to be fair, however it is helping me learn a lot about myself and others; dealing with rejection (ghosting and ignoring), keeping conversations going (or not)
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While I already knew I was an outlier, Fab has really brought home – and ground in – just how far out I lie.
It increasingly looks like that what I want doesn't exist, but I have no other choice than to keep searching. |
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