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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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For the last few years, I have struggled to get a good nights sleep. The first issue was that I was sleeping on a bed that is only suitable for those who like a hard mattress and/or as a spare bed (my son got a new one and gave me this one). I got rid of the mattress and treated myself to a memory foam mattress, as my finances are not good, its only a cheap one but nevertheless much softer than the lump of granite I had on it before.
My next issue was the pillows, I have realised that the ones I was using were not good at all; much too soft and no support and probably not for use with a memory foam mattress (I have tried two styles of memory foam pillows and found them too hard for me). I then treated myself to two new pillows designed for side sleepers as that is what I mostly am. Absolutely no better, I still have the same issue with these in that I wake in the morning with them rammed up against the headboard, pain in my neck, shoulders and upper back and it feels like my bones are scrapping against each other, and feel like I have barely slept at all 
Before I bought the pillows, I did some research on the internet but to be honest, I think that when these so called experts do their research, they use an ordinary mattress not a memory foam one. I did really like the idea of getting one of those curved ones but the one I saw on the internet had a 'hole' in it for ones ear, which I thought a bit hard, the reviews showed that it was not comfortable, others I saw at Denholm in Gloucester seemed too flat
I also know by the patch alopecia I am suffering from at the moment, that I am stressing and obviously very badly though I had not realised it. I have had blood tests and there is nothing medically wrong with me.
So am looking for some possible solutions; one so far that I have is to put a marine board underneath the mattress as I do not think the memory foam mattress is suitable with a slatted base. Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated; I do sometimes have a great nights sleep but I think that is more because I have spent several nights with little sleep |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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hi sorry to hear you are having problems sleeping..... we too had a memory foam matteress and pillows as i have had neck surgery and find it difficult to sleep at times......... the pillows were rubbish and i only tried for one night made my neck so bad wasnt able to sleep for about a week.......i deffinately find this way of sleeping much better....... two pillows the bottom one pulled right down under my neck and the top one slightly higer, and the most important and i know it sounds odd but one pillow between your kness does it for me. It raises your spine so its in a natural straight position......the perfect postion would be another pillow rolled and placed down your spine for support....... i dont tend to use the last pillow these days but when i was in hospital that was how they placed all my pillows and it was wonderful..... but the pillow between your kness is a def pain reliever xxxx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is it definitely the bed that is causing the issues? I used to really struggle with sleeping (and still do on occasion) but one very simple thing that helped me was switching to decaf tea. I know it doesn't sound like much, but at work one of the girls in the office brews almost every hour so I often wouldn't realise how much caffeine I was supping.
I'd look at diet as well as the bed as you could be spending a lot of money and not fixing the route cause of the problem x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"hi sorry to hear you are having problems sleeping..... we too had a memory foam matteress and pillows as i have had neck surgery and find it difficult to sleep at times......... the pillows were rubbish and i only tried for one night made my neck so bad wasnt able to sleep for about a week.......i deffinately find this way of sleeping much better....... two pillows the bottom one pulled right down under my neck and the top one slightly higer, and the most important and i know it sounds odd but one pillow between your kness does it for me. It raises your spine so its in a natural straight position......the perfect postion would be another pillow rolled and placed down your spine for support....... i dont tend to use the last pillow these days but when i was in hospital that was how they placed all my pillows and it was wonderful..... but the pillow between your kness is a def pain reliever xxxx "
I have heard of the idea of putting a pillow under the knees but just never got round to doing it. It does however seem right, if I lie on my back, it just feels wrong with my legs flat, therefore also creating a curvature of the spine at the neck area which wouldn't help sleep at all.
I might try what you have suggested with the two pillows though, it obviously creates a softer curve of the body and a better alignment of the spine |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is it definitely the bed that is causing the issues? I used to really struggle with sleeping (and still do on occasion) but one very simple thing that helped me was switching to decaf tea. I know it doesn't sound like much, but at work one of the girls in the office brews almost every hour so I often wouldn't realise how much caffeine I was supping.
I'd look at diet as well as the bed as you could be spending a lot of money and not fixing the route cause of the problem x "
I don't drink tea or coffee; when I drank coffee, I knew that was one of the causes as I did drink an awful lot so I know it is not that now though I do miss it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it definitely the bed that is causing the issues? I used to really struggle with sleeping (and still do on occasion) but one very simple thing that helped me was switching to decaf tea. I know it doesn't sound like much, but at work one of the girls in the office brews almost every hour so I often wouldn't realise how much caffeine I was supping.
I'd look at diet as well as the bed as you could be spending a lot of money and not fixing the route cause of the problem x
I don't drink tea or coffee; when I drank coffee, I knew that was one of the causes as I did drink an awful lot so I know it is not that now though I do miss it"
Just wondering if there could be an issue other than the bed...would hate for you to spend a fortune on a new bed and be no better off. Do you ever get an opportunity to sleep in other beds (such as hotels)...do you sleep better in them?
Do you keep your feet warm when you sleep? I know socks in bed aren't the sexiest but cold toes could keep you up too!
If you're anything like me, you'll be stressed about it before you even get into bed and that won't be helping either. Things that help me chill out are reading and sex (not at the same time though...can lose your page!).
If it's definitely the bed, then it's worth an investment...but if you haven't already, maybe see if there could be something else keeping you awake before you part with so much cash x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most nights I find myself dropping off on the sofa with the telly on as cant seem to fall asleep in my bed. If I go to bed I know I will lay there for hours trying to fall asleep so frustrating. My brain don't switch off. One thing that helps is a little soft music listen to radio with headphones in helps me relax and a good play also helps to relax. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Most nights I find myself dropping off on the sofa with the telly on as cant seem to fall asleep in my bed. If I go to bed I know I will lay there for hours trying to fall asleep so frustrating. My brain don't switch off. One thing that helps is a little soft music listen to radio with headphones in helps me relax and a good play also helps to relax."
sometimes we don't realise we are conditioning ourselves. I have been suffering erratic sleep not because I can't sleep but cos I have a nbr from hell upstairs and this has effected my sleep patterns now.
I do find though that I need to be both mentally and physically tired for a really good sleep. Have to be careful what I watch on telly too as some stuff gives me nightmares which I am able and will wake myself up from. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is it definitely the bed that is causing the issues? I used to really struggle with sleeping (and still do on occasion) but one very simple thing that helped me was switching to decaf tea. I know it doesn't sound like much, but at work one of the girls in the office brews almost every hour so I often wouldn't realise how much caffeine I was supping.
I'd look at diet as well as the bed as you could be spending a lot of money and not fixing the route cause of the problem x
I don't drink tea or coffee; when I drank coffee, I knew that was one of the causes as I did drink an awful lot so I know it is not that now though I do miss it
Just wondering if there could be an issue other than the bed...would hate for you to spend a fortune on a new bed and be no better off. Do you ever get an opportunity to sleep in other beds (such as hotels)...do you sleep better in them?
Do you keep your feet warm when you sleep? I know socks in bed aren't the sexiest but cold toes could keep you up too!
If you're anything like me, you'll be stressed about it before you even get into bed and that won't be helping either. Things that help me chill out are reading and sex (not at the same time though...can lose your page!).
If it's definitely the bed, then it's worth an investment...but if you haven't already, maybe see if there could be something else keeping you awake before you part with so much cash x"
Yes I have slept in other beds ie hotels but not alone so don't sleep that well anyway, nor do I sleep that well with my friend either as I am used to sleeping alone. And a caravan once when we went to Gems. I did also get the chance of sleeping in a different bed when my kids took me away to Butlines and had my own room, woke early like I normally do
Yes I wear socks in bed though not so much in summer otherwise I roast; memory foam mattress does make me very hot
And I suspect that as I am struggling to sleep, I stress over that too, find it difficult to relax even if all I have done in an evening is chill on here
Think I need more than just a new bed as I do wake easily from the slightest noise too plus light in the bedroom, definitely need new curtains I know that much too
Either way I think I need to spend money, not just maybe on a new bed etcc but perhaps on a class like tai chi, so that I can learn to relax possibly and stop stressing over everything |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Most nights I find myself dropping off on the sofa with the telly on as cant seem to fall asleep in my bed. If I go to bed I know I will lay there for hours trying to fall asleep so frustrating. My brain don't switch off. One thing that helps is a little soft music listen to radio with headphones in helps me relax and a good play also helps to relax."
I sometimes do that though its only on a Saturday night after working 18 hrs in 2 days and I also struggle with getting my brain to shut up, I did try having the radio on low, kept me awake all night as I cannot sleep with any noise, so frustrating |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hi sorry to hear you are having problems sleeping..... we too had a memory foam matteress and pillows as i have had neck surgery and find it difficult to sleep at times......... the pillows were rubbish and i only tried for one night made my neck so bad wasnt able to sleep for about a week.......i deffinately find this way of sleeping much better....... two pillows the bottom one pulled right down under my neck and the top one slightly higer, and the most important and i know it sounds odd but one pillow between your kness does it for me. It raises your spine so its in a natural straight position......the perfect postion would be another pillow rolled and placed down your spine for support....... i dont tend to use the last pillow these days but when i was in hospital that was how they placed all my pillows and it was wonderful..... but the pillow between your kness is a def pain reliever xxxx
I have heard of the idea of putting a pillow under the knees but just never got round to doing it. It does however seem right, if I lie on my back, it just feels wrong with my legs flat, therefore also creating a curvature of the spine at the neck area which wouldn't help sleep at all.
I might try what you have suggested with the two pillows though, it obviously creates a softer curve of the body and a better alignment of the spine "
well it does work for me.......... good luck hope it helps xxx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Either way I think I need to spend money, not just maybe on a new bed etcc but perhaps on a class like tai chi, so that I can learn to relax possibly and stop stressing over everything "
Shame you can't just install an on/off switch to the brain sometimes to turn off all the thoughts going through your head just as you're about to drop off! One thing I did try was writing down the things that were going round my head (and shredding them the next day in case anyone found then thought I was an nymphomaniac lunatic!)...sort of getting the thoughts out so you don't have to try to remember them till the morning. Hope you have some kind of luck because I understand how crazy it can drive you xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Either way I think I need to spend money, not just maybe on a new bed etcc but perhaps on a class like tai chi, so that I can learn to relax possibly and stop stressing over everything
Shame you can't just install an on/off switch to the brain sometimes to turn off all the thoughts going through your head just as you're about to drop off! One thing I did try was writing down the things that were going round my head (and shredding them the next day in case anyone found then thought I was an nymphomaniac lunatic!)...sort of getting the thoughts out so you don't have to try to remember them till the morning. Hope you have some kind of luck because I understand how crazy it can drive you xx"
Today is the second time I have been dragged out of bed at 5am, now that either means son or friend went to the loo, a neighbour went off to work or its just coincidence. And yes jotting down thoughts seems a good idea too |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"www.ntw.nhs.uk/pic/selfhelp
Chose the booklet on sleep it's very good for sleep hygiene tips x "
hygiene? Have clicked on and emailed to work to print |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I suffered from problems with my neck due to uncomfortable pillows until I changed to a posture support one several years ago now. I'm never going to be the worlds best sleeper but it certainly stopped the problems with a stiff neck, it did take a few days to get used to but worth it in the end. Might be worth a try and nowadays you can get them from most places including Argos and even some of the bigger supermarkets stock them. Hope it helps x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I suffered from problems with my neck due to uncomfortable pillows until I changed to a posture support one several years ago now. I'm never going to be the worlds best sleeper but it certainly stopped the problems with a stiff neck, it did take a few days to get used to but worth it in the end. Might be worth a try and nowadays you can get them from most places including Argos and even some of the bigger supermarkets stock them. Hope it helps x"
Are you talking about the curved pillows? See I was looking at them on the Debenhams website and read all the reviews, didn't seem too bad but the one in the store is I think not the same and plus the last time I went with the reviews, what I bought hasn't suited me I do like the idea of being able to cuddle it though |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"www.ntw.nhs.uk/pic/selfhelp
Chose the booklet on sleep it's very good for sleep hygiene tips x "
Read this leaflet last night, some really good pointers in it and am going to look at doing them. I have also thought though that the recent changes in my pub shifts perhaps is also adding to my problem. However and saying this quietly (shhh) I did sleep okay last night but not going to celebrate too soon in case its a one off as I do get them So thanks so much for this  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Took a girl home after clubbing last night. After a few drinks, we went up stairs and while we were taking our clothes off a voice came from the bed and said " i hope thats not that tart from last week" the girl said "what the fuck was that" ? i said "its that bastard memory foam mattress i bought"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry, didn't get on here at all yesterday so only just able to answer. No the pillows we use are not shaped, but I have just looked in the Argos book and they have three "normal" shaped ones in there that vary from £9.99 - £15. They are the type we use and in fact they're the only pillows I use in the house now. Our son has them and we even use them for guests and a lot of family have said how nice they are. Good luck, hope you get sorted and start getting a good nights sleep x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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" Took a girl home after clubbing last night. After a few drinks, we went up stairs and while we were taking our clothes off a voice came from the bed and said " i hope thats not that tart from last week" the girl said "what the fuck was that" ? i said "its that bastard memory foam mattress i bought"
"
the oldies are the best aren't they   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sorry, didn't get on here at all yesterday so only just able to answer. No the pillows we use are not shaped, but I have just looked in the Argos book and they have three "normal" shaped ones in there that vary from £9.99 - £15. They are the type we use and in fact they're the only pillows I use in the house now. Our son has them and we even use them for guests and a lot of family have said how nice they are. Good luck, hope you get sorted and start getting a good nights sleep x"
I only responded this morning but I have re-read what you have said, when I saw posture pillows I thought that is what you meant but will have a look, thanks |
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