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Who's your daddy?

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By *abloBack OP   Man  over a year ago

London

 

 

The  following are all replies that Manchester women have written on Child Support Agency forms in the section for listing "father's details" or putting it another way....Who's the Daddy?

These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check out No 10. It  takes 1st prize and No 3 is runner up.

1.  Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, Makeeshia was fathered by Maclearndon McKinley I am unsure as to the identity of the father of Marlinda, but I believe that she was conceived on the same night.

2. I am  unsure, as to the identity of the father of my child as I was  being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I  can provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at  the party if this helps.

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived at a party at 360 East Bolton Avenue where I had sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you please send me his phone number? Thanks.

4. I  don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto  in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact  BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it replaced.

5. I have never had sex with a man. I am still a Virginian. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was imaculat and that he is the Saver risen again.

6. I cannot tell you the name of Alleshia's dad as he informs me that to  do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for the economy. I am torn between doing right by you  and right by the country. Please advise...

7. Tyrone Hairston is the father of child A If you do catch up with him, can  you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? Child B who was also borned at the same time.... well, I don't have clue.

8. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro-Disney; maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom 

9. So  much about that night is a blur, the only thing that I remember for  sure is Gordon Ramsey did a programme about eggs earlier in the evening. If I had stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 56 Miller St, mine might have remained unfertilized.

10. I  am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all, like when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

 

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hysterical

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Very funny!

Can't help think that some of the young-uns round here would probably be stupid enough to put multiple names down on the form - not just cos the pregnancy was the result of a behind the bus station shag fest one d*unken Friday night - but because they're daft enough to think they'll get payments from all they've put down!

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By *abloBack OP   Man  over a year ago

London

Yeah but no but yeah but

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

number 2 had me laughing for ages, i couldnt even compose myself to write a reply

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By *abloBack OP   Man  over a year ago

London

I love no 4

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The wit of number 9 has me giggling. Thanks for this chuckle before bedtime.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Very funny!

Can't help think that some of the young-uns round here would probably be stupid enough to put multiple names down on the form - not just cos the pregnancy was the result of a behind the bus station shag fest one d*unken Friday night - but because they're daft enough to think they'll get payments from all they've put down! "

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By *abloBack OP   Man  over a year ago

London

Gordon Ramsey gets blamed for everything

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By *usty boobsWoman  over a year ago

studley

class - this made my day

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By *abloBack OP   Man  over a year ago

London


"class - this made my day"

Glad to oblige!

If I ever get the chance

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