FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When I was 41... (And mental health)
When I was 41... (And mental health)
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
It was a very good year!
It was a very good year for travelling around,
When I left the UK,
And went to Norway.
When I became a bum,
When I was 41.
Now I am 42,
It's been a very good year!
It's been a very good year to travel around,
Going place to place,
With a smile on my face.
On a long Choo Chooooo
Now I am 42.
;-)
What an amazing 17ish months I've had. Last year Norway and Germany mainly. This year I've done 9 Countries and well over 25.000kms since April. I've experienced amazing things, been to beautiful places, met lots of Wunderbar people and had awesome opportunities.
All in my profile if you have 10 minutes to read it.
Ok let's save some time and energy here...
I know some of you will say I'm selfish for travelling during a pandemic but I assure you I've only been where I was legally allowed to go and took the precautions I was legally required to take.
Those of you who know me, get in touch.
Those of you who don't feel free to get in touch.
Now the mental health side...
This may be my only thread in The Lounge as the minority of people on here like to spoil it for some. Think it's time everyone started growing up to be honest. This site should be for ALL regardless of spelling, who they are, where they're from etc... Think the mods should start issuing warnings to these people who think it's funny to put someone else down for ANY reason. It's not big, It's not hard but shallow and weak! Real strength comes from the heart... real strength is when you can swallow youre pride and help others feel welcome and equal to you instead of being made to feel like they're not worthy of posting threads because every time they do they get jumped on and berated for really petty things.
Please admin this needs to STOP! Like that 'Women' post yesterday. Imagine how she felt? Did you stop to think maybe she is dyslexic? Even if she's not show support instead of hate. There are threads to have a joke and banter. This is The Lounge, a lounge is a place to chill and relax. To be made to feel welcome and not uneasy. If a thread isn't your fancy... ignore it. Don't feel the need to comment to cause hurt. May seem like harmless fun TO YOU but put yourself in the other persons shoes. You don't know them, you don't know if they're depressed, had a traumatic life or going through something traumatic. So please think before you speak before someone gets really hurt! They may only be words but words can make people do unspeakable things. It is a form of bullying and with all the suicides that's happened in the past as a result of 'words' you'd think it would teach people that some people are fragile and we need to start showing respect to one another.
It does say in the rules under section
J. do anything which may negatively affect other users enjoyment of the Service
I really don't think people enjoy being ridiculed and I certainly don't enjoy reading it. I have emphathy for that person. We're all adults here and don't get me wrong I love to have a laugh and banter, but there's a time and a place. You don't have to make every thread a banter thread.
Think I've said what needed to be said. I thought this needs to be said so I've said it. now let's move on... 
Oh... Hello btw  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey OP 
Nicely put. Hope you had a good trip  "
Having a good trip (life) thank you and yes it's been more than I expected. I never imagined the things I've done when I left UK... I don't plan I just go where the day takes me. Unless I'm working somewhere.
Hope you're well x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Welcome back buddy , its great to hear about your adventures "
Thanks butt... It has been quite an adventure mind. Be good to chat to some of the people I chatted too before and see how they are! Will have to wait for them to contact me as they have filters on.   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey Op where are you wintering this year? "
Bonjour... I'm heading South slowly. Not sure where exactly somewhere where it's warmer during the winter months. Currently in Yvonand Switzerland absolutely stunning here and so chilled.
Hope you're good |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well said OP Good to see you back "
Hello Vakker!!! (Here's the vakker from my bio! Vove this woman to bits)
Would ask how you are but we chat every 10 minutes. Good to be back... probably... if the said people behave themselves lol...
NO! I've said my bit so I will TRY and bite my tongue... TRY!!! xx |
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"Hey Op where are you wintering this year?
Bonjour... I'm heading South slowly. Not sure where exactly somewhere where it's warmer during the winter months. Currently in Yvonand Switzerland absolutely stunning here and so chilled.
Hope you're good "
Yes mate. Probably heading to Southern Spain myself for a bit of wintering.
You should check out the Tarifa area and along the coast towards Cadiz. Gorgeous unspoilt and limited tourism.
Happy trails. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey Op where are you wintering this year?
Bonjour... I'm heading South slowly. Not sure where exactly somewhere where it's warmer during the winter months. Currently in Yvonand Switzerland absolutely stunning here and so chilled.
Hope you're good
Yes mate. Probably heading to Southern Spain myself for a bit of wintering.
You should check out the Tarifa area and along the coast towards Cadiz. Gorgeous unspoilt and limited tourism.
Happy trails. "
Will have a research today... both of those points sounds ideal. I don't really make plans on where I'm going I just know I'm going South. Where I end up? Who knows? But I do check the weather I has lead towards the areas with nicer weather. Well I say I do... I sometimes do. Not sure if you read my profile ( ) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thank you, OP.
I think a lot of us are fed up and tired, and our normal coping mechanisms are severely disrupted.
... and it shows. "
Thank you!! Yeah it brings the forums down a lot! I hate to witness bullying and I've left a few times because it never changes and the admin don't seem to punish this behaviour! They just close the thread, but it's in most threads. Strict warnings are needed! At the end of the day it's rule breaking but some of the 'popular' people on here do it and people follow them as if they seem to think they'll fit in better. But I think it's up to us to monitor it also. Don't get mad at them maybe just have a quite word. All I know is that it needs to stop. Like I said we don't know what people are going through in their lives and maybe come here to chat and find friends. Then to be abused and it may tip them over the edge. I'm not saying people can't have an opinion on threads... Just use your words respectfully and carefully. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We're all adults and should be able to tell which threads are meant as a laugh and you can have a banter but some are there as a cry for help maybe. You know which ones. I'm leaving... Rate my profile is a classic one of insecurity. There's lots more... Just have a think before commenting why these people are posting these threads. Advice and support is what they're after not abuse! Danke! |
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"Welcome back op x
Bonjour... Thank you and how have you been? Hope you're not letting this virus get you down! "
I have been doing ok thanks - trying to not let it annoy me too much 
Enjoyed reading your profile and catching up with your travels x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Welcome back op x
Bonjour... Thank you and how have you been? Hope you're not letting this virus get you down!
I have been doing ok thanks - trying to not let it annoy me too much
Enjoyed reading your profile and catching up with your travels x"
Good to hear!! Send you a link to my YouTube channel of you wanted to have a gander. Some nice drone footage on there. X |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok I realise that some people don't understand mental health and the effects it has on people. I told my mother I suffered with depression and she said don't be so stupid it's all in your head!! 
For those of you who don't understand and for those of you battling with depression and addiction. Please watch this and always remember. You are NOT alone. Speak to people, feel free to message me if you need someone to talk too. Just DON'T suffer in silence! Xx
https://youtu.be/gRGRduyCy_M |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How do you bump threads?
I would like to see some more support if possible. Maybe can take this to the admins then...
I'm not trying to cause anything by this or cause a devide. I just want some peace in the forums. I had a private message from someone who was greatly affected by this on her last profile and she suffers deeply with depression. So it makes me feel good that I've helped at least one person from this but I'm sure many more can benefit from it. Just comment a if you can in support.
All I'm asking for is harsher warnings for unacceptable and uncalled for comments please. Be nice if a mod could comment also.
Like I said this is all for the benefit of the site, forums and members.
Danke |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Welcome back op, glad to read you’ve been having a great time. It’s been a funny few months on the forums. As things ease I hope they become fun again x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Welcome back op, glad to read you’ve been having a great time. It’s been a funny few months on the forums. As things ease I hope they become fun again x "
Hi. Thanks.. How have you been coping? Yeah I keep in touch with people from UK so know what you guys have been going through. I don't mean to rub this in people's faces. Just wanted you to know how it's been and even in a global pandemic a person living like this can still enjoy it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It was a very good year!
It was a very good year for travelling around,
When I left the UK,
And went to Norway.
When I became a bum,
When I was 41.
Now I am 42,
It's been a very good year!
It's been a very good year to travel around,
Going place to place,
With a smile on my face.
On a long Choo Chooooo
Now I am 42.
;-)
What an amazing 17ish months I've had. Last year Norway and Germany mainly. This year I've done 9 Countries and well over 25.000kms since April. I've experienced amazing things, been to beautiful places, met lots of Wunderbar people and had awesome opportunities.
All in my profile if you have 10 minutes to read it.
Ok let's save some time and energy here...
I know some of you will say I'm selfish for travelling during a pandemic but I assure you I've only been where I was legally allowed to go and took the precautions I was legally required to take.
Those of you who know me, get in touch.
Those of you who don't feel free to get in touch.
Now the mental health side...
This may be my only thread in The Lounge as the minority of people on here like to spoil it for some. Think it's time everyone started growing up to be honest. This site should be for ALL regardless of spelling, who they are, where they're from etc... Think the mods should start issuing warnings to these people who think it's funny to put someone else down for ANY reason. It's not big, It's not hard but shallow and weak! Real strength comes from the heart... real strength is when you can swallow youre pride and help others feel welcome and equal to you instead of being made to feel like they're not worthy of posting threads because every time they do they get jumped on and berated for really petty things.
Please admin this needs to STOP! Like that 'Women' post yesterday. Imagine how she felt? Did you stop to think maybe she is dyslexic? Even if she's not show support instead of hate. There are threads to have a joke and banter. This is The Lounge, a lounge is a place to chill and relax. To be made to feel welcome and not uneasy. If a thread isn't your fancy... ignore it. Don't feel the need to comment to cause hurt. May seem like harmless fun TO YOU but put yourself in the other persons shoes. You don't know them, you don't know if they're depressed, had a traumatic life or going through something traumatic. So please think before you speak before someone gets really hurt! They may only be words but words can make people do unspeakable things. It is a form of bullying and with all the suicides that's happened in the past as a result of 'words' you'd think it would teach people that some people are fragile and we need to start showing respect to one another.
It does say in the rules under section
J. do anything which may negatively affect other users enjoyment of the Service
I really don't think people enjoy being ridiculed and I certainly don't enjoy reading it. I have emphathy for that person. We're all adults here and don't get me wrong I love to have a laugh and banter, but there's a time and a place. You don't have to make every thread a banter thread.
Think I've said what needed to be said. I thought this needs to be said so I've said it. now let's move on...
Oh... Hello btw "
Absolutely agree....Seems some love nothing than putting others down in one way or another.
For an adult site it is surprising how much immaturity there is
Wishing you luck in the rest of your adventures |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It was a very good year!
It was a very good year for travelling around,
When I left the UK,
And went to Norway.
When I became a bum,
When I was 41.
Now I am 42,
It's been a very good year!
It's been a very good year to travel around,
Going place to place,
With a smile on my face.
On a long Choo Chooooo
Now I am 42.
;-)
What an amazing 17ish months I've had. Last year Norway and Germany mainly. This year I've done 9 Countries and well over 25.000kms since April. I've experienced amazing things, been to beautiful places, met lots of Wunderbar people and had awesome opportunities.
All in my profile if you have 10 minutes to read it.
Ok let's save some time and energy here...
I know some of you will say I'm selfish for travelling during a pandemic but I assure you I've only been where I was legally allowed to go and took the precautions I was legally required to take.
Those of you who know me, get in touch.
Those of you who don't feel free to get in touch.
Now the mental health side...
This may be my only thread in The Lounge as the minority of people on here like to spoil it for some. Think it's time everyone started growing up to be honest. This site should be for ALL regardless of spelling, who they are, where they're from etc... Think the mods should start issuing warnings to these people who think it's funny to put someone else down for ANY reason. It's not big, It's not hard but shallow and weak! Real strength comes from the heart... real strength is when you can swallow youre pride and help others feel welcome and equal to you instead of being made to feel like they're not worthy of posting threads because every time they do they get jumped on and berated for really petty things.
Please admin this needs to STOP! Like that 'Women' post yesterday. Imagine how she felt? Did you stop to think maybe she is dyslexic? Even if she's not show support instead of hate. There are threads to have a joke and banter. This is The Lounge, a lounge is a place to chill and relax. To be made to feel welcome and not uneasy. If a thread isn't your fancy... ignore it. Don't feel the need to comment to cause hurt. May seem like harmless fun TO YOU but put yourself in the other persons shoes. You don't know them, you don't know if they're depressed, had a traumatic life or going through something traumatic. So please think before you speak before someone gets really hurt! They may only be words but words can make people do unspeakable things. It is a form of bullying and with all the suicides that's happened in the past as a result of 'words' you'd think it would teach people that some people are fragile and we need to start showing respect to one another.
It does say in the rules under section
J. do anything which may negatively affect other users enjoyment of the Service
I really don't think people enjoy being ridiculed and I certainly don't enjoy reading it. I have emphathy for that person. We're all adults here and don't get me wrong I love to have a laugh and banter, but there's a time and a place. You don't have to make every thread a banter thread.
Think I've said what needed to be said. I thought this needs to be said so I've said it. now let's move on...
Oh... Hello btw
Absolutely agree....Seems some love nothing than putting others down in one way or another.
For an adult site it is surprising how much immaturity there is
Wishing you luck in the rest of your adventures "
There's just no need for it really. Maybe it is that people see the popular guys with lots of veris do it and copy as they think that's what you do to attract...
Thank you for your support on both matters. I'm glad you're still taking to me after knowing I kill mosquitoes I will try not to in future. Or I tell you what I'll put up with 30 bites and that's it!!! They'll be fine soon probably.
I'm thinking of doing a little blog maybe? |
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By *aver999Couple
over a year ago
East Mids |
"Ok I realise that some people don't understand mental health and the effects it has on people. I told my mother I suffered with depression and she said don't be so stupid it's all in your head!! "
I've only recently started reading the forums and was surprised by some of the reoccurring threads. There was one on Friday regarding depression in men that was quite moving, yet still someone posted a comment along the lines of "man up". I spent a long time writing a reply but in the end couldn't bring myself to post it.
It's a real issue for middle aged men, who often struggle to find the right help, finding something on a swingers forum may not be the most appropriate place but could be the trigger for them to seek it.
It's encouraging to see so many diverse threads other than sex, but agree that at times there does seem to be those that love to point out the posters mistakes rather than add anything to the discussion. Although this is common in most forums on the internet  |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
Hi OP, thank you for highlighting the effects peoples words can have. I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement.
Sometimes all it takes to save someone is a listening ear |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ok I realise that some people don't understand mental health and the effects it has on people. I told my mother I suffered with depression and she said don't be so stupid it's all in your head!!
I've only recently started reading the forums and was surprised by some of the reoccurring threads. There was one on Friday regarding depression in men that was quite moving, yet still someone posted a comment along the lines of "man up". I spent a long time writing a reply but in the end couldn't bring myself to post it.
It's a real issue for middle aged men, who often struggle to find the right help, finding something on a swingers forum may not be the most appropriate place but could be the trigger for them to seek it.
It's encouraging to see so many diverse threads other than sex, but agree that at times there does seem to be those that love to point out the posters mistakes rather than add anything to the discussion. Although this is common in most forums on the internet "
Yeah it's a shame people can be so selfish and not understand that people are different. People don't understand mental health unless they have an issue with it or they know someone who does.
You should have replied if you felt strongly enough about it. Thanks for commenting |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi OP, thank you for highlighting the effects peoples words can have. I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement.
Sometimes all it takes to save someone is a listening ear "
Yeah that's a shocking thing to say to someone. What was the thread called I missed it...
See I won't just sit and watch it. I've made comments in the past but I lost my cool and got timed out and kept losing my cool. I thought this time of approach it differently.
Yes words can and does affect people more than people think. It's not harmless fun for someone who suffers with mental health and if you say something to defend yourself you're called a snowflake. That's just a response from someone who is uneducated in these matters. I know this is a swingers site and people talk rude and dirty... But don't have to have dogs at people and make it personal. Like I said it takes more guts and courage to swallow your pride and pick someone up when they're down. Youll get a lot more respect from it. Sure these people get meets etc because it's not just men that do it. Women can be just as bad so they will attract each other. If you want to have a banter look for a thread that encourages a laugh and banter or make a thread. Don't jump into a thread where the OP is obviously in some distress and/or seeking some moral support.
Sorry to hear about your son and I wish you and your family the best! Thanks for commenting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I couldn't agree more.
I once posted a thread that was asking a genuine question and got a very nasty reply from a female.
It was a sensitive subject anyway and then her reply made things even worse.
People need to think more about how they speak to people on here, I've had a really tough Lockdown courtesy of a crazy ex and I am now back on anti depressants as a result. Be kind. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I couldn't agree more.
I once posted a thread that was asking a genuine question and got a very nasty reply from a female.
It was a sensitive subject anyway and then her reply made things even worse.
People need to think more about how they speak to people on here, I've had a really tough Lockdown courtesy of a crazy ex and I am now back on anti depressants as a result. Be kind. "
Sorry to hear that. I hope you're feeling better now and on the road to being you again. Fab needs to address this as an important issue!
I'm surprised they haven't shown up here... I dare them too!!!! I won't put up with their crap!
Be sure to look after yourself and here if you ever want to chat xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Awesome post OP
I fear however the sentiment will be lost and the
Same old trolls and bullies will still continue in the forums with little to no action taken.
It often amazes me that people who are part of a scene that can be so easily judged by the “mainstream” world, (For want of a better word), can themselves be the most judgmental. |
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By *aver999Couple
over a year ago
East Mids |
"I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement."
Absolutely people are so quick to make a comment or funny remark without thinking or caring about how it may affect others.
"You should have replied if you felt strongly enough about it. Thanks for commenting "
Oh I spent maybe an hour thinking and composing a reply, but in the end the thought of posting it and what it my bring was too much. Revisiting dark times is always difficult.
Thank you OP for bringing this up, we really need to be kind to everyone at the moment.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I couldn't agree more.
I once posted a thread that was asking a genuine question and got a very nasty reply from a female.
It was a sensitive subject anyway and then her reply made things even worse.
People need to think more about how they speak to people on here, I've had a really tough Lockdown courtesy of a crazy ex and I am now back on anti depressants as a result. Be kind.
Sorry to hear that. I hope you're feeling better now and on the road to being you again. Fab needs to address this as an important issue!
I'm surprised they haven't shown up here... I dare them too!!!! I won't put up with their crap!
Be sure to look after yourself and here if you ever want to chat xx"
Thank you.
I reported her comment and it was removed pretty swiftly but it is something that really needs addressing by Fab xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Awesome post OP
I fear however the sentiment will be lost and the
Same old trolls and bullies will still continue in the forums with little to no action taken.
It often amazes me that people who are part of a scene that can be so easily judged by the “mainstream” world, (For want of a better word), can themselves be the most judgmental. "
Well I'm hoping it will change as the decent people here are fed up and it's affecting members. It's affecting the forums and they're going to end up losing members. People get timed out for far less than what's being said. Maybe the admins need educating about mental health. Like I said I had a very heartfelt message from someone who went through a horrible time because of it.
Yes there is a lot of judging going on here. Well its my first day back and I'm not prepared to stand by and watch others suffer because of the bullying. People shouldn't feel scared to express themselves and join in on the forums or feel they're not worthy to make a thread.
Thanks for commenting x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement.
Absolutely people are so quick to make a comment or funny remark without thinking or caring about how it may affect others.
You should have replied if you felt strongly enough about it. Thanks for commenting
Oh I spent maybe an hour thinking and composing a reply, but in the end the thought of posting it and what it my bring was too much. Revisiting dark times is always difficult.
Thank you OP for bringing this up, we really need to be kind to everyone at the moment.
"
Well that's another problem. People to stand up to these people as THEY may get timed out with no repercussions for who they're standing up to. Doesn't make sense to me. This really needs addressing and I hope this has been picked up by admin...
Personally I think a mass email to people inboxes should be sent saying it won't be tolerated anymore. Not just to people doing... everyone! So that people can come back to the forums knowing they're safe from abuse. I've talked to members who now avoid the forums as its really gone downhill. And ex memebers who have left because of the childnisness... Maybe they can create another forum for people who wish to have serious conversations like they did with the games. I don't know thats their job... but i think its going to take more than this to change it.
Again this thread is not meant to cause any trouble just trying to make the forums a better for EVERYONE... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I couldn't agree more.
I once posted a thread that was asking a genuine question and got a very nasty reply from a female.
It was a sensitive subject anyway and then her reply made things even worse.
People need to think more about how they speak to people on here, I've had a really tough Lockdown courtesy of a crazy ex and I am now back on anti depressants as a result. Be kind.
Sorry to hear that. I hope you're feeling better now and on the road to being you again. Fab needs to address this as an important issue!
I'm surprised they haven't shown up here... I dare them too!!!! I won't put up with their crap!
Be sure to look after yourself and here if you ever want to chat xx
Thank you.
I reported her comment and it was removed pretty swiftly but it is something that really needs addressing by Fab xx"
Do you know if the person who made the comment was timed out or anything? Would be great hear she did! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I couldn't agree more.
I once posted a thread that was asking a genuine question and got a very nasty reply from a female.
It was a sensitive subject anyway and then her reply made things even worse.
People need to think more about how they speak to people on here, I've had a really tough Lockdown courtesy of a crazy ex and I am now back on anti depressants as a result. Be kind.
Sorry to hear that. I hope you're feeling better now and on the road to being you again. Fab needs to address this as an important issue!
I'm surprised they haven't shown up here... I dare them too!!!! I won't put up with their crap!
Be sure to look after yourself and here if you ever want to chat xx
Thank you.
I reported her comment and it was removed pretty swiftly but it is something that really needs addressing by Fab xx
Do you know if the person who made the comment was timed out or anything? Would be great hear she did! "
I don't know to be honest... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi OP, thank you for highlighting the effects peoples words can have. I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement.
Sometimes all it takes to save someone is a listening ear "
That thread was upsetting wasn't it and hats off to you for supporting your son, I understand it, it is draining emotionally as well as physically playing bi polar roulette, living on an edge often putting your own needs on the back burner.
Having to cancel nights out on top of everyone ignoring how you might be feeling because they are concerned for that person, and you feel like screaming 'what about me' but you know you can't lose your shit because then everything is fucked....so you carry on with silent tears and forcing a smile
I've been there too.
You are amazing 
So, can I ask you, how are you? How are you feeling? X
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Empathy is a rarity, we can sympathise with someone but we don't always put ourselves in the shoes of the other person... Their thoughts their feelings and how our actions can affect another.
I reported a thread earlier, was created inviting others to think of ways to humiliate someone else in the name of 'fun'
And these threads spilling hatred for celebrities, I don't understand how one can hate another person without 'knowing' them....
But I guess the internet facilitates the behaviour because of the anonymity it gives.
All I know is kindness costs nothing and could mean the world to someone else
Kindness costs nothing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hey great to have you back but on the other hand dont stop travelling..I found myself and how to deal with my issues through my travels and living in a woodland... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree with you buddy . This should be a fun , silly but safe and gentle space thats inclusive for all .
I think some people feel a tad left out in some threads. Most of us forumites know eachother quite well now .
We should revel in our diffences , embrace our uniqueness , and try to be kinder |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi OP, thank you for highlighting the effects peoples words can have. I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement.
Sometimes all it takes to save someone is a listening ear
That thread was upsetting wasn't it and hats off to you for supporting your son, I understand it, it is draining emotionally as well as physically playing bi polar roulette, living on an edge often putting your own needs on the back burner.
Having to cancel nights out on top of everyone ignoring how you might be feeling because they are concerned for that person, and you feel like screaming 'what about me' but you know you can't lose your shit because then everything is fucked....so you carry on with silent tears and forcing a smile
I've been there too.
You are amazing
So, can I ask you, how are you? How are you feeling? X
"
Please listen to this and know if you need to chat and let off steam you can PM me! No one should be silent or made to feel like they should be silent.
https://youtu.be/RIq0Bq1LvO8
I mean this for anyone and anyone. I know what it's like to bottle things up and silently hold feelings inside... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi OP, thank you for highlighting the effects peoples words can have. I remember that thread on Friday and having a son who has suffered mental health problems I really struggled not to 'lose my cool' at the man up statement.
Sometimes all it takes to save someone is a listening ear
That thread was upsetting wasn't it and hats off to you for supporting your son, I understand it, it is draining emotionally as well as physically playing bi polar roulette, living on an edge often putting your own needs on the back burner.
Having to cancel nights out on top of everyone ignoring how you might be feeling because they are concerned for that person, and you feel like screaming 'what about me' but you know you can't lose your shit because then everything is fucked....so you carry on with silent tears and forcing a smile
I've been there too.
You are amazing
So, can I ask you, how are you? How are you feeling? X
Please listen to this and know if you need to chat and let off steam you can PM me! No one should be silent or made to feel like they should be silent.
https://youtu.be/RIq0Bq1LvO8
I mean this for anyone and anyone. I know what it's like to bottle things up and silently hold feelings inside... "
Everyone and anyone... |
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"Empathy is a rarity, we can sympathise with someone but we don't always put ourselves in the shoes of the other person... Their thoughts their feelings and how our actions can affect another.
I reported a thread earlier, was created inviting others to think of ways to humiliate someone else in the name of 'fun'
And these threads spilling hatred for celebrities, I don't understand how one can hate another person without 'knowing' them....
But I guess the internet facilitates the behaviour because of the anonymity it gives.
All I know is kindness costs nothing and could mean the world to someone else
Kindness costs nothing. "
Well said |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Empathy is a rarity, we can sympathise with someone but we don't always put ourselves in the shoes of the other person... Their thoughts their feelings and how our actions can affect another.
I reported a thread earlier, was created inviting others to think of ways to humiliate someone else in the name of 'fun'
And these threads spilling hatred for celebrities, I don't understand how one can hate another person without 'knowing' them....
But I guess the internet facilitates the behaviour because of the anonymity it gives.
All I know is kindness costs nothing and could mean the world to someone else
Kindness costs nothing. "
Exactly. It costs nothing but could be life changing for someone else. Life saving even! I encourage people next time you're walking around in public (where face masks are not in use obviously) and you see someone without a smile. Give them one of yours... Not only will it put a smile on their fave it'll make your smiler bigger. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey great to have you back but on the other hand dont stop travelling..I found myself and how to deal with my issues through my travels and living in a woodland... "
Trust me... I don't intend to. I'll stop when I'm not able to lift my bag up... even then I'll get one of those trolleys. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree with you buddy . This should be a fun , silly but safe and gentle space thats inclusive for all .
I think some people feel a tad left out in some threads. Most of us forumites know eachother quite well now .
We should revel in our diffences , embrace our uniqueness , and try to be kinder "
Thanks Taff. Exactly this! No member should be made to think twice about making a thread or posting a comment just in case it's not received well. Like I said if someone makes a thread you don't agree with. Pass it by... plenty more on here. |
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