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Being able to accommodate
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is this a huge factor when couples or Ladies consider meeting males? I'm hoping to be in my own place come the new year and was wondering what the thoughts of couples and ladies were on this subject? |
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Maybe pop a note on your profile if you want to clarify. But short and sweet.
Wouldn't deter me but would be something I'd look at as a factor. But that's just me personally and everyones different x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi Clark.....you will probably find a small improvement. The fact that a guy cannot accommodate can be seen by some as signalling that he is maybe attached. It could put some off.
Your ability to accommodate will, therefore help in those cases.....regardless of where you actually meet.
Good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why is it that when a man cant accommodate eyebrows are raised and hes clearly not single but when a woman cant it's not even a consideration?
Just the impression I get from reading these kind of threads... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is for me, as I can't accommodate (I make clear why) and if they guy can't either, the next suggestion from him is usually "outside or car?"  Not really compatible with a regular thing.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can accommodate, but I generally don't.... ....by that I mean that I have my own house and I could accommodate and I have in the past for ppl I know well and trust, but for fab meets unless I've known them several months and met five or six times or something then they're coming nowhere near my house because I have a child and neighbours and I don't need fab on my doorstep.... ....it's never held me back, I wouldn't stress about it OP, there are always options if you really want something....   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can accommodate, but I generally don't.... ....by that I mean that I have my own house and I could accommodate and I have in the past for ppl I know well and trust, but for fab meets unless I've known them several months and met five or six times or something then they're coming nowhere near my house because I have a child and neighbours and I don't need fab on my doorstep.... ....it's never held me back, I wouldn't stress about it OP, there are always options if you really want something.... "
Also for those who just don't want to meet you, they'll often pick a non-hurtful excuse to save your feelings, so if they say it's because you can't accommodate, it's not always the truth.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd rather not bring/invite complete strangers, or people I barely know into my home, but that's just me. On the flip side, I wouldn't expect or someone who barely knew me to accommodate. |
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"I can accommodate, but I generally don't.... ....by that I mean that I have my own house and I could accommodate and I have in the past for ppl I know well and trust, but for fab meets unless I've known them several months and met five or six times or something then they're coming nowhere near my house because I have a child and neighbours and I don't need fab on my doorstep.... ....it's never held me back, I wouldn't stress about it OP, there are always options if you really want something.... "
Yes, definitely this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Much prefer a day use hotel 
Not even staying the night  outrageous
You have to be very very good to get a sleep over invite  "
I am very good at being bad  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that when a man cant accommodate eyebrows are raised and hes clearly not single but when a woman cant it's not even a consideration?
Just the impression I get from reading these kind of threads..."
Well it's pretty simple to understand in the environment of swingers in the modern world of fab and those who have seen it from the other side (single females and couples)
1. there are far more single men than ever and way more of them than double all the couples and women put together, plenty of those single men are "playing away" and the "can accommodate" is seen as more likely to be genuinely single than one that isn't.
2 women are more likely to feel threatened or be a victim of harassment and will be more careful with safety aspects so will be less likely to be wanting strangers know where they live.
3 single women and couples who have children will often not be able to accommodate or might not wish to have people in their own home.
We are sure that there's other reasons but the above are usually the main factors.
Its inprinted into the culture and unfortunately the split standards are not helped by the amount of bad behaviour of the majority of the single guy's here.
It's sad but that is the way it is until the numbers become more balanced and the majority of single guy's conduct improve its just going to be the way if is unfortunately. |
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"Is this a huge factor when couples or Ladies consider meeting males? I'm hoping to be in my own place come the new year and was wondering what the thoughts of couples and ladies were on this subject? "
If you're will to pay for hotel rooms you can accommodate there is no reason you need to put can not accommodate if you're really wanting to meet ...
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I've always offered the option to come to mine after a social or if we felt comfortable straight over.
Never had any complaints, over nights are welcome too. Nothing better than a relaxed evening in comfortable surroundings. Much preferred than a cold couple of hours in a hotel. |
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"I've always offered the option to come to mine after a social or if we felt comfortable straight over.
Never had any complaints, over nights are welcome too. Nothing better than a relaxed evening in comfortable surroundings. Much preferred than a cold couple of hours in a hotel. "
My hotel meets are generally very "hawt" tbh.
And I don't have to hoover.
Winning |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never caused me any great issue although there are plenty who will automatically assuming that it means you're cheating, I had plenty of PM flak from such people  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't meet men that can't or won't accommodate after meeting a few times.
If I feel safe I have - and expect the same.
If you can't invite me in your home then your not invited in my vagina  |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
It doesn't bother me of someone can't accomadate in fact I will never go to a guys place on a first meet again I did once when I first joined here and learned my lesson fast. I prefer to have a social then go to a hotel next time. If we get on well and decide to meet again then one of us can accomadate next time.
I can accommodate I just choose to say on my profile I don't as it stops people presuming I am willing to bring them to my home. When I see dont accommodation on a male profile I presuame the same. Only people I know well and can trust get brought to my home.
I do find it strange when I get messages from guys that just say something along the lines hey fancy meeting up today I can accomadate as tho because they can it will make me want to meet them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would and have gone go to someone else's home but I'm a terrible guest. I find it difficult to relax at first. I love to welcome people to my home. It's nothing special since I left the Chapel but it's clean, tidy and well stocked with everything we might need and I hope that others find the apmosphere warm and inviting. |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
"Why is it that when a man cant accommodate eyebrows are raised and hes clearly not single but when a woman cant it's not even a consideration?
Just the impression I get from reading these kind of threads..."
Yep another double standard sadly
Not accommodating alone is not a sure sign someone is attached
People live with family or have lodgers etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that when a man cant accommodate eyebrows are raised and hes clearly not single but when a woman cant it's not even a consideration?
Just the impression I get from reading these kind of threads...
Well it's pretty simple to understand in the environment of swingers in the modern world of fab and those who have seen it from the other side (single females and couples)
1. there are far more single men than ever and way more of them than double all the couples and women put together, plenty of those single men are "playing away" and the "can accommodate" is seen as more likely to be genuinely single than one that isn't.
2 women are more likely to feel threatened or be a victim of harassment and will be more careful with safety aspects so will be less likely to be wanting strangers know where they live.
3 single women and couples who have children will often not be able to accommodate or might not wish to have people in their own home.
We are sure that there's other reasons but the above are usually the main factors.
Its inprinted into the culture and unfortunately the split standards are not helped by the amount of bad behaviour of the majority of the single guy's here.
It's sad but that is the way it is until the numbers become more balanced and the majority of single guy's conduct improve its just going to be the way if is unfortunately. "
I disagree with all your points lol.
1) just because there are more men than women or couples on here doesnt mean the majority of them are cheating
2) men can feel just as anxious going to a strangers' house. Who knows who else is there. I'd not go to anyones house on a first time of meeting.
3) single men also can be single dads with kids at some so this reason doesnt make sense to me.
I agree there is a double standard but to say that is because of 'bad behaviour' of men is again unfair. Women cheat too! |
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"Why is it that when a man cant accommodate eyebrows are raised and hes clearly not single but when a woman cant it's not even a consideration?
Just the impression I get from reading these kind of threads...
Well it's pretty simple to understand in the environment of swingers in the modern world of fab and those who have seen it from the other side (single females and couples)
1. there are far more single men than ever and way more of them than double all the couples and women put together, plenty of those single men are "playing away" and the "can accommodate" is seen as more likely to be genuinely single than one that isn't.
2 women are more likely to feel threatened or be a victim of harassment and will be more careful with safety aspects so will be less likely to be wanting strangers know where they live.
3 single women and couples who have children will often not be able to accommodate or might not wish to have people in their own home.
We are sure that there's other reasons but the above are usually the main factors.
Its inprinted into the culture and unfortunately the split standards are not helped by the amount of bad behaviour of the majority of the single guy's here.
It's sad but that is the way it is until the numbers become more balanced and the majority of single guy's conduct improve its just going to be the way if is unfortunately.
I disagree with all your points lol.
1) just because there are more men than women or couples on here doesnt mean the majority of them are cheating
2) men can feel just as anxious going to a strangers' house. Who knows who else is there. I'd not go to anyones house on a first time of meeting.
3) single men also can be single dads with kids at some so this reason doesnt make sense to me.
I agree there is a double standard but to say that is because of 'bad behaviour' of men is again unfair. Women cheat too! "
Totally agree with all your points Oreo! I think it can sometimes seem like there is more bad behaviour from men but I think that is simply because there are more men. I imagine the percentages are pretty similar. I also find it strange that people forget that single men can have kids too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that when a man cant accommodate eyebrows are raised and hes clearly not single but when a woman cant it's not even a consideration?
Just the impression I get from reading these kind of threads...
Well it's pretty simple to understand in the environment of swingers in the modern world of fab and those who have seen it from the other side (single females and couples)
1. there are far more single men than ever and way more of them than double all the couples and women put together, plenty of those single men are "playing away" and the "can accommodate" is seen as more likely to be genuinely single than one that isn't.
2 women are more likely to feel threatened or be a victim of harassment and will be more careful with safety aspects so will be less likely to be wanting strangers know where they live.
3 single women and couples who have children will often not be able to accommodate or might not wish to have people in their own home.
We are sure that there's other reasons but the above are usually the main factors.
Its inprinted into the culture and unfortunately the split standards are not helped by the amount of bad behaviour of the majority of the single guy's here.
It's sad but that is the way it is until the numbers become more balanced and the majority of single guy's conduct improve its just going to be the way if is unfortunately.
I disagree with all your points lol.
1) just because there are more men than women or couples on here doesnt mean the majority of them are cheating
2) men can feel just as anxious going to a strangers' house. Who knows who else is there. I'd not go to anyones house on a first time of meeting.
3) single men also can be single dads with kids at some so this reason doesnt make sense to me.
I agree there is a double standard but to say that is because of 'bad behaviour' of men is again unfair. Women cheat too! "
Innit.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I disagree with all your points lol.
1) just because there are more men than women or couples on here doesnt mean the majority of them are cheating
2) men can feel just as anxious going to a strangers' house. Who knows who else is there. I'd not go to anyones house on a first time of meeting.
3) single men also can be single dads with kids at some so this reason doesnt make sense to me.
I agree there is a double standard but to say that is because of 'bad behaviour' of men is again unfair. Women cheat too! "
Well no but if you have a single female profile, a couple profile you come across alot of men playing away or just read around in the forum you will find it's there.
We can all feel anxious and we all might have children and to be honest we all have a similar dilemma on the accommodation front.
Let's put it like this if and when she/we/couples or women want to meet a single guy on here there are literally 100s to choose from and if you want to pick someone out from that massive crowd (due to the ratio) what would you do? Pick the filter out to pick out a better candidate that is less likely to be attached and may accommodate you when the kids are in bed at your home? It boils down to "choice" not what is fair for you it's what is fair for them as it's their right to a choice.
Just trying to point out that if you want to appeal to a wider audience then it's best to show yourself in the best light.
Should we feel like meeting a single guy we make ammendments to our looking for and message filters because we would get bombarded with mail all the time, unfortunately most of that mail looking or not with be rude, disrespectful or low quality like "fancy a fuck" from people who treat it like a free prostitute site and there is lots and lots of married men as well behaviour isn't just limited to faithfulness.
We don't like it but it's just the way it is now and it's not like we can change it.
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By *icearmsMan
over a year ago
KIDLINGTON |
I'll throw my 2 pence worth in here..
I can accommodate and have accommodated. However from experiences I have had, I would tend to meet first time and possibly sencond time in a hotel.
I've had 2 experiences now where someone has randomly turned up at my door expecting that I am free to play. Once being when my son was at home with me. Imagine the awkward questions from him and the awkward conversation on the door step.
Now I need to feel that I know and understand the person and personality before I would give my address away.
If that means it's harder to get a meet then fine. I'll just stick to going to socials and building rapport with people there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well fab tick box option is "can accommodate" I don't think most couples would expect to be invited to someone's home man, woman or couples home without a social first so we feel like there is a bit of confusion on some perceive it.
There's a lot more than turn up, fuck and leave to swinging LOL |
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