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Short personal ads
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"Tall toned and slightly hairy seeks interesting woman with gaping fairy."  | |||
"Unhinged yet honest, may snap neck of idiots " brilliant | |||
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"Loquacious seeks bodacious. " Award for succinct | |||
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"Idiot seeks similar " | |||
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"Short round fem seeks tall square man x" Sounds like the Mister Men books. | |||
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"Sweet strange jiggly woman seeking random conversations and cute dicks. "Works for me  | |||
"Unhinged yet honest, may snap neck of idiots " That's actually perfect | |||
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"Short round fem seeks tall square man x" Square pegs dont fit round holes? didnt you learn anything as a kid? | |||
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"Short, middle aged man seeks random hole to cock punch." 90% of the make population on fab right? Just needs "will treat (her) well" | |||
"Short round fem seeks tall square man x Sounds like the Mister Men books. " The stories we would create would not be PG ones x | |||
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 and no trousers | |||
"Short round fem seeks tall square man x Sounds like the Mister Men books. The stories we would create would not be PG ones x" | |||
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"Unconvincing transvestite seeks anyone who'll have her. Bring winegums. " on my way to the shop now | |||
"Unconvincing transvestite seeks anyone who'll have her. Bring winegums. on my way to the shop now " | |||
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"Booby geek with fucked up sense of humour and a very short attention span seeks strong, funny weirdos for no strings fantasy encounters. " | |||
"Booby geek with fucked up sense of humour and a very short attention span seeks strong, funny weirdos for no strings fantasy encounters. " *lets his inner weirdo out* | |||
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D. | |||
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"Short arse who's good in bed, try me "Do you have a scratching post ??? | |||
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"Short arse who's good in bed, try me
Do you have a scratching post ??? "You won't need a scratching post | |||
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"Gorgeous fat fucker fem seeks tall man, goegeous on the inside.
Your turn. "I "may" have posted these on one of my threads before; Paul Coia look a like seeks companion for long walks and dining out, for platonic friendship only, no sex (except anal) XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX North Sockford man, good looking professional type age 34, WLTM genuinely caring lady who will not swallow my heart whole and then shit it out in a raging bonfire of spite. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Sporty fit attractive female seeks lumpy disastrous "all over in two minutes" mid-life crisis sufferer for short to mid term relationship. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Spoon seeks flag. This sounds odd. So does baked Alaska. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Woman placing advert seeks man responsive to advert. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Man dressed as snail, GSOH, likes classical music, seeks woman dressed as patio. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Gingerbread man seeks gingerbread lady. Must be single, over 8" and made of gingerbread. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Victorian slattern, fallen woman. Carnal smorgasbord extraordinaire, I will manipulate you to leisurely issue, no hasty pudding. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 120 single men seek at least three women (must be single) for swinging. No more wooden legs please. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX I look nothing like my photo, I am a pig-eyed horse frightener with an electronic part. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 7' 6" man seeks 1' 2" woman to shove up bum. Only possible with these lengths. Feet first though, no kinky stuff. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Unusual Milford woman early 40's, shaped like a keyhole, seeks genuine man with big round head and narrow body that widens into a triangle towards his huge flat feet. Resemblance to keyhole unimportant. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Tall slim woman from Codge seeks quiet petite portable man with carrying handles and little wheels. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Vivacious/vacuous woman, never known which one was which, WLTM local man with no fear of commitment/communards, never known which one was which. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Quiet shy lady from Urling, aged 42, looks unimportant, actually very important, so pay attention!!! To me you are a mere mote of dust on the collar of God. Mountains quake at my approach. Likes eating out, romantic walks in the country and romantic novels. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Fun seeking F, own parrot WLTM treasure seeking pirate. Likes cinema, map reading and long romantic walks up the plank. Yarl be sorry.......... XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Very oily lady wishes to slip into your life. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Straight curious man from Codge seeks straight Codge man for straight gay relationship. No funny stuff. None of that!!! You people make me sick. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Male 32, own house and car seeks big affectionate breasts for fun and friendship. Woman attached to breasts need not be anything special. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Genuine lesbian, usual description, seeks two other lesbians with long blonde hair to do things in front of me while I watch. Honestly I'm a real lesbian. Call Dave or Malcolm on **** ******** XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Male 39, positively charged personality seeks negatively charged woman without fillings, jewellery or pacemaker for nights in stuck to the fridge. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX I love dancing but have no legs. Maybe you have legs but hate dancing. Together I could ride you to happiness. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Stephen King fan, gothic female 36. Brown hair, into cinema and reading books seeks nice gently guy for tying to the bed and breaking his fucking ankles. Maybe more.......... XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Single mum age 32. Enjoys being single, so fuck off. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Bottom of Alfriston canal. You were drowning, I was trying to retrieve my shopping trolley, hence I was a bit distracted. Do you still need saving? XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Attractive separated sporty man. Very sporty sport, likes sport. Looking for sporty sport who likes sport. How many words am I allowed? 25. ok. Sport. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Caring sensitive genuine male. Likes opera, reading books, quiet romantic nights in, cooking, going to the theatres, walking hand in hand through the countryside, visiting museums and gallery's, art and literature. Old fashioned gentleman. Show me your tits. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Attractive professional male 46, seeks fun woman for fun in June 1973. It may seem like a long time ago, but I'm optimistic. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX *courtesy of the Framley Examiner | |||
"Clumsy lady seeks man who doesn’t bruise easily to love her." Would you settle for a guy who will just adore you? | |||
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"Clumsy lady seeks man who doesn’t bruise easily to love her. Would you settle for a guy who will just adore you? " I’d be honoured | |||
"Clumsy lady seeks man who doesn’t bruise easily to love her. Would you settle for a guy who will just adore you? I’d be honoured "So should any guy. | |||
"Clumsy lady seeks man who doesn’t bruise easily to love her." Don’t bruise me I won’t bruise you | |||
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"Cougar seeks prey" that will work Every time | |||
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"Cougar seeks prey that will work Every time" Yes, yes it does | |||
"Short, middle aged man seeks random hole to cock punch." Say what you like, but although this profile pic is of a cock, it actually made me laugh | |||
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"Cougar seeks prey that will work Every time Yes, yes it does" I knew it | |||
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"Seeks man with pulse" You deserve so much more | |||
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"Tall, relatively filthy man seeks woman who is pleasantly crackers for above average sex "An addendum: needs shower installing | |||
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"Clumsy (very intelligent) lady seeks man who doesn’t bruise easily to love her." FTFY | |||
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"Clumsy (very intelligent) lady seeks man who doesn’t bruise easily to love her. FTFY "Awwwww | |||
"Old but functioning seek people who get it. " You’d get it. | |||
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"Bald 'n' bearded seeks similar female "Hmmm you might get a lady responding if she has alopecia or hirsutism, not necessarily at the same time tho. | |||
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"Old but functioning seek people who get it. You’d get it. " | |||
"Man seeking lady (poor eyesight) an advantage for fun. " Ladies, leave your glasses at home | |||
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"Tall, relatively filthy man seeks woman who is pleasantly crackers for above average sex
An addendum: needs shower installing "I have one we can share | |||
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"Tall, relatively filthy man seeks woman who is pleasantly crackers for above average sex
An addendum: needs shower installing
I have one we can share " the add-on was for the needs of the filthy man | |||
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"Bald 'n' bearded seeks similar female
Hmmm you might get a lady responding if she has alopecia or hirsutism, not necessarily at the same time tho. " | |||
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"4' bed for sale, would suit small child or amputee. Offers" I would. No thanks to the creepy bed tho. | |||
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"Pick me, pick me... Annoying AF "“Desperate female seeks... anyone really” | |||
PS: Mrs D seeks females for friendship and fun, hubby is happy for me doing this by myself | |||
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"Pick me, pick me... Annoying AF
“Desperate female seeks... anyone really” "Block, delete, move on | |||
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"Cunt. Arse. Twat. Piss. Crocodile. Tourette's sufferer seeks girlfriend." Never a dull moment | |||
"Fat birds likes going on top. If you die, you die" I'm sure many will risk it | |||
"Tall ish professional sexy guy with good body Looking for sexy female with great sense of humour and fabulous bum for fun times can travel , message me or fab my pictures or just wink Ta very much oh ps I can travel x" And the anti-award for succinct ad goes to... | |||
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jelly babies guaranteed | |||
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"Angel in the north requires filthy devil to assist with halo polishing "Loving it | |||
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"Unhinged yet honest, may snap neck of idiots " Or neck of dildo if angry | |||
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"Booby geek with fucked up sense of humour and a very short attention span seeks strong, funny weirdos for no strings fantasy encounters. " Oh that was me . Still right | |||
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"Tall toned and slightly hairy seeks interesting woman with gaping fairy." That brought back memories. You’d never believe it worked! | |||
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