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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The farmer had said sleep in the 10 acre tonight as I ve put a handful of cows up in the upper quarter. Ok says I. Anyways the day had been one of dancing, dancing that lasted late into the night and by the time I decided to bed down Id forgotten. It was a time that I had no home..just a 4x4, a stove, sleeping bag and work gear. I crawled aching but happy veneath the sleeping bag, naked as always and fell asleep to the warbling sounds of a nightjar. I always slept with the doors wide open as I love and need that cool air on my body. Id only been asleep two hours when a strange guttural noise woke me..WTF as my eyes slowly took in the sight and my ears adjusted to the sound. Ih my fkin god..there staring at me, nostrils flairing in a very pissed off manner was Ben...the bull!!
No Im not on about about a well hung guy..Im on about prime breeding pissed off half ton jet black bull!!
FK!!! Ok. His head was pretty much in the truck with me, could feel, almost taste his steaming breath...eugh. I slowly slid my coverings away and was able to slide out of the opposite side, kind of embarrassed that morning glory was not fkin helping. My long handled shovel lay on the ground so I pucked it up and slowly waved it in the hope he d back up and leave. Yup he backed up.
Then tossed his head about and pawed at the ground in, what I considered, a rather agressive manner. Managed to sidle my way into the driving seat and turned the key. As the engine fired up so did the stereo...guess he didn t like buddy guys blues...as he came close and nudged at the truck..banged it into 4 wheel drive, first gear and put my foot down. Headed for the gateway onto main road..couldn t see if he was following as he was black as night..got to the gate...still naked..threw it open..drove out and then as a car passed by to a view of a slightly crazy naked person jumping his ass outta the vehicle and slamming the gate shut...just as Ben arrived..head to the gate..tossing and throwing his big muscular neck around....laugh? I was in tears of laughter as yet another car went by..guess the sight of a naked guy, lower legs covered in mud was an everyday sight in these wild hills...either that or they knew me as the harmless crazy guy living in the woods lol....
Cmon..give me a funny story  |
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Great story
Friend of mine , walking back to his hotel in Goa, pitch black night, middle of nowhere when wallop he walked into something solid and fell on his arse.
There was a cow , stood in the middle of the path, asleep. It didn't even move (mooo-ve?) when he bounced off it.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Great story
Friend of mine , walking back to his hotel in Goa, pitch black night, middle of nowhere when wallop he walked into something solid and fell on his arse.
There was a cow , stood in the middle of the path, asleep. It didn't even move (mooo-ve?) when he bounced off it.
"
Wheres bleddy health and safety..a bloody hi viz on a black cow wouldn t go amiss   |
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