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How do you adjust?

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By *ewrocks OP   Woman  over a year ago

button moon

Your mental image of yourself?

I'm not sure how to explain what I'm asking, so please bear with my ramblings.

I've lost a fairly significant amount of weight. 7St/45kg. I've gone from a size 22, to 14. I'd been at least a size 16 from the age of 16. Lots of yo-yoing but I've always been overweight as an adult.At 5ft 8 broad built and a healthy weight, I don't think the person in the mirror looks too bad at all,I have a physical job and love weight training.

But that's not the image in my head. I should be happy, proud of myself. More confident. Instead I don't recognise me. I don't feel like that person is me. How do I get my mental image to catch up?

Hopefully that made sense to someone.x

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By *riar BelisseWoman  over a year ago

On Holibobs

I think you need to take time to find who you are, maybe some mindfullness at a favourite place to look inside yourself and start putting together the new you

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By *elle xWoman  over a year ago

Doire Theas

Well done you should be very proud of yourself I completely know where you are coming from what others see and what I see are completely different but I’m slowly learning to love myself I guess it takes a lot of time. Have you tried shopping I know things are a little weird right now and changing rooms aren’t always available but you should buy yourself something you would never felt confident enough before to wear it can do wonders for your confidence

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By *ewrocks OP   Woman  over a year ago

button moon


"Well done you should be very proud of yourself I completely know where you are coming from what others see and what I see are completely different but I’m slowly learning to love myself I guess it takes a lot of time. Have you tried shopping I know things are a little weird right now and changing rooms aren’t always available but you should buy yourself something you would never felt confident enough before to wear it can do wonders for your confidence "

I have ordered some new clothes, as currently got very little that doesn't fall down/look ridiculous

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By *elle xWoman  over a year ago

Doire Theas


"Well done you should be very proud of yourself I completely know where you are coming from what others see and what I see are completely different but I’m slowly learning to love myself I guess it takes a lot of time. Have you tried shopping I know things are a little weird right now and changing rooms aren’t always available but you should buy yourself something you would never felt confident enough before to wear it can do wonders for your confidence

I have ordered some new clothes, as currently got very little that doesn't fall down/look ridiculous "

Brilliant I think until you see yourself in new smaller sized clothes it’s very difficult to adjust your mindset this will help you x

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By *ewrocks OP   Woman  over a year ago

button moon


"Well done you should be very proud of yourself I completely know where you are coming from what others see and what I see are completely different but I’m slowly learning to love myself I guess it takes a lot of time. Have you tried shopping I know things are a little weird right now and changing rooms aren’t always available but you should buy yourself something you would never felt confident enough before to wear it can do wonders for your confidence

I have ordered some new clothes, as currently got very little that doesn't fall down/look ridiculous

Brilliant I think until you see yourself in new smaller sized clothes it’s very difficult to adjust your mindset this will help you x"

I dont think lockdowns helped, as other people don't recognise me either with a mask on half the lost weigh has been since march.

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By *elle xWoman  over a year ago

Doire Theas


"Well done you should be very proud of yourself I completely know where you are coming from what others see and what I see are completely different but I’m slowly learning to love myself I guess it takes a lot of time. Have you tried shopping I know things are a little weird right now and changing rooms aren’t always available but you should buy yourself something you would never felt confident enough before to wear it can do wonders for your confidence

I have ordered some new clothes, as currently got very little that doesn't fall down/look ridiculous

Brilliant I think until you see yourself in new smaller sized clothes it’s very difficult to adjust your mindset this will help you x

I dont think lockdowns helped, as other people don't recognise me either with a mask on half the lost weigh has been since march. "

No I’m sure not we are living in very strange times but the important thing is not to focus on how others see you and focus on how you see yourself and slowly but surely you will start to see it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Well done for the self awareness and recognition you clearly have, aswell as the obvious progress you've made OP. I think the mind is a slow and stubborn thing at times. I have no real suggestion other than let time attend to it and it'll click into place when it's ready, but in the meantime try to avoid beating yourself up about how you feel and try not to force it - enjoy each day and let it find you, if that makes sense....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Have you even been hurt by the look of others toward your body size ?

If yes, you may still see yourself through the eyes of others.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Well done you. I know when I’ve lost weight I’ve always struggled to see it but can see my gains easily. Like now I feel so huge. Can I ask what you did OP?

I think a shopping trip always helps

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