FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > How do you find the balance?
How do you find the balance?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Of showing interest in someone yet not coming on too strong?
Of being cheeky without being too cheeky?
Hmmm in fact maybe this was a silly thread.
And this is not a players tips section, I’m just in a pondering mood.
How are you btw?  |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
You have to go on your instinct and how they react.
If a fella comes on too strong I’ll tell him. He’ll back off. And then we will pootle along just fine.
Don’t overthink it, just go with the flow. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Be strict with yourself from the outset of what you want from your potential socials/meets and fb/fwb.
If things seem like they're going astray from what you wanted then look at where things lie on your want list.
Above all else stay true to you. Never allow yourself to feel low from how someone's treated you. Even on here there are players.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they respond with closed messages then they're not too fussed.
I can pass the time with anyone, sometimes you just need to be bold so that they know? |
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"I get the balance wrong I think. I play it far too cool, almost to the point it looks like I don’t care. I don’t realise I’m doing it. But it works, apparently.  "
Don't say things like this! All the fab men will now think all the women giving them the cold shoulder are actually into them!  |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them "
 this is me too. I think I’m a bit too blunt  |
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"You have to go on your instinct and how they react.
If a fella comes on too strong I’ll tell him. He’ll back off. And then we will pootle along just fine.
Don’t overthink it, just go with the flow."
That’s my problem I try not to jump in with 2 feet  |
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By *ouanna JoWoman
over a year ago
A little village |
"I get the balance wrong I think. I play it far too cool, almost to the point it looks like I don’t care. I don’t realise I’m doing it. But it works, apparently.
Don't say things like this! All the fab men will now think all the women giving them the cold shoulder are actually into them! "
Oh shit yeah, sorry! I do this with all of them to be honest, whether I like them or not!  |
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"I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them
this is me too. I think I’m a bit too blunt "
"Nora wants you to explore her. You game?"  |
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"You have to go on your instinct and how they react.
If a fella comes on too strong I’ll tell him. He’ll back off. And then we will pootle along just fine.
Don’t overthink it, just go with the flow."
That’s my problem. Always rushing in to fast  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them
this is me too. I think I’m a bit too blunt
"Nora wants you to explore her. You game?" "
. I usually say hello first! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it feels forced or unbalanced in some ways i find it has been useful to take a step back and reflect on what is going on.
I tend to work more in the pull principle having been caught out coming on too strong. However I think once there’s mutual interest it just tends to flow. |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them
this is me too. I think I’m a bit too blunt "
Same, I'm definitely too blunt, get myself into trouble sometimes  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them
this is me too. I think I’m a bit too blunt
Same, I'm definitely too blunt, get myself into trouble sometimes "
Yeah. But at least I’m always honest. Rather be blunt but honest unlike a lot on here x |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I think I always come on too strong, I'm very forward and just tend to say what I'm thinking. Sometimes it puts men off but that's good in a way, saves me being disappointed when I terrify them
this is me too. I think I’m a bit too blunt
Same, I'm definitely too blunt, get myself into trouble sometimes
Yeah. But at least I’m always honest. Rather be blunt but honest unlike a lot on here x"
Indeed. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I think it varies from person to person as to how you play it - the key is gauging which is required in each case.
Some people like regular contact, with others it's infrequent but friendly.
The best type is where it just flows naturally and no real thought goes into whether you're being pushy or not. |
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