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Friends bf on dating app
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So hopefully this won't get too controversial.
But I have a friend (female) who has been with her boyfriend a long time.
Not an open relationship or anything. However before lockdown they had a few ups and downs. They are still together, I asked how they are and she says they are fine now and are back looking at houses.
However someone I know also knows her boyfriend. And has seen him on a dating app. He told her he was single a couple of days ago.
What would you do? The right thing is surely to tell her as she is your friend. But at the same time could get very messy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would tell her.
People will tell you ‘it’s not your shit show!’ but I’d rather know. If my husband was doing something like that, I’d want to know about it.
They’re looking at houses? Fuck that. Tell her. |
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She deserves to know.
My OH is on tinder (obvs with my knowledge) so luckily I can just say ‘it’s ok I know’.
Yes, it might cause a shitstorm but it will also open dialogue between the pair to either split up or open their relationship or whatever.
My #1 rule is ‘you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors’ and you telling her Is factual. That’s just my opinion anyway.
*disclaimer - I do believe you have to be really close to someone to be able to do it though. Not just someone you ‘know to say hello to’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's all heresay, you know nothing for sure. Dont get involved.
If you saw him on an app, then maybe you can tell her.
My friend sent me a screenshot"
Forward the screenshot, say you’re sorry that you’re the one who’s showing her, but your pal showed you and you’d rather she knew about it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She deserves to know.
My OH is on tinder (obvs with my knowledge) so luckily I can just say ‘it’s ok I know’.
Yes, it might cause a shitstorm but it will also open dialogue between the pair to either split up or open their relationship or whatever.
My #1 rule is ‘you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors’ and you telling her Is factual. That’s just my opinion anyway.
*disclaimer - I do believe you have to be really close to someone to be able to do it though. Not just someone you ‘know to say hello to’ "
 |
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Personally I wouldn’t say a thing, I noticed someone on here that seemed to look familiar and it turned out to be a friends on off bf, as it happens he’s a bit I’d a twat anyway and she came to that conclusion all by herself without any input from me. Plus you could potentially get the blame for breaking up or causing issues in your friends relationship  |
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"It's all heresay, you know nothing for sure. Dont get involved.
If you saw him on an app, then maybe you can tell her.
My friend sent me a screenshot
Forward the screenshot, say you’re sorry that you’re the one who’s showing her, but your pal showed you and you’d rather she knew about it"
This! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would tell her.
People will tell you ‘it’s not your shit show!’ but I’d rather know. If my husband was doing something like that, I’d want to know about it.
They’re looking at houses? Fuck that. Tell her. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's all heresay, you know nothing for sure. Dont get involved.
If you saw him on an app, then maybe you can tell her.
My friend sent me a screenshot
Forward the screenshot, say you’re sorry that you’re the one who’s showing her, but your pal showed you and you’d rather she knew about it"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having thought about this a bit more I think it would depend how close a friend. If it was my best friend/brother/sister then I think I’d maybe speak to the person in the wrong and not the friend. Anyone else I’d stay out of it. I really don’t believe in getting involved in others people’s business. At all! |
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"It's all heresay, you know nothing for sure. Dont get involved.
If you saw him on an app, then maybe you can tell her.
My friend sent me a screenshot
Forward the screenshot, say you’re sorry that you’re the one who’s showing her, but your pal showed you and you’d rather she knew about it"
This those I class as friends I would be sure to let them know, if it was just a someone I knew to say hi to & polite chat I'd stay out of it tbh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would tell her.
People will tell you ‘it’s not your shit show!’ but I’d rather know. If my husband was doing something like that, I’d want to know about it.
They’re looking at houses? Fuck that. Tell her. "
Agree with you totally.
Tell her. A friend deserves honesty. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it was an acquaintance I'd stay out. A friend, she deserves to know. Yes it's shitty and being the barer of bad news isn't great but she should know. It's also saving her as people will see him on tinder and if people are talking behind her back. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would tell her.
People will tell you ‘it’s not your shit show!’ but I’d rather know. If my husband was doing something like that, I’d want to know about it.
They’re looking at houses? Fuck that. Tell her. "
Very much this!! What friend would let her just carry on oblivious.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So hopefully this won't get too controversial.
But I have a friend (female) who has been with her boyfriend a long time.
Not an open relationship or anything. However before lockdown they had a few ups and downs. They are still together, I asked how they are and she says they are fine now and are back looking at houses.
However someone I know also knows her boyfriend. And has seen him on a dating app. He told her he was single a couple of days ago.
What would you do? The right thing is surely to tell her as she is your friend. But at the same time could get very messy. "
Stay out of it!none of your business 
Simples |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’d say it depends entirely on your relationship with this friend. Are you close enough that you would hope that she would tell you in similar circumstances or are you sufficiently removed that you feel it wouldn’t be any of her business?
It’s a hard one but only you really know what your dynamic is with this friend |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She deserves to know.
My OH is on tinder (obvs with my knowledge) so luckily I can just say ‘it’s ok I know’.
Yes, it might cause a shitstorm but it will also open dialogue between the pair to either split up or open their relationship or whatever.
My #1 rule is ‘you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors’ and you telling her Is factual. That’s just my opinion anyway.
*disclaimer - I do believe you have to be really close to someone to be able to do it though. Not just someone you ‘know to say hello to’ "
I agree. I probably wouldn't tell a work colleague.
A man at work was having an affair with another woman at work. Everyone knew except his wife. It was horrible when she found out because she felt betrayed by not just him but her friends and colleagues too. |
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"If you have to stick your nose in, speak to him about it, not her"
Exactly this, it's a big if too. But go speak to the boyfriend and have a chat. Nobody knows what's happening and before throwing a hand grenade you need to find out. Having said that. Not sure you need to get involved at all. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"It's all heresay, you know nothing for sure. Dont get involved.
If you saw him on an app, then maybe you can tell her. "
Agreed as it's then not hearsay, I would be taking screenshots as proof though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's all heresay, you know nothing for sure. Dont get involved.
If you saw him on an app, then maybe you can tell her.
My friend sent me a screenshot
Forward the screenshot, say you’re sorry that you’re the one who’s showing her, but your pal showed you and you’d rather she knew about it"
Absolutely this |
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The right thing is to tell her, but that has so many variables. She does need to know though. The middle ground could be to send her the screenshot from an anon source then you're not the messenger but have done the right thing telling her, and can be there as a friend without it messing your friendship up.
One caveat though. A lot of people genuinely don't know you have to deactivate your account not just delete the app so there's an outside tiny chance of innocence, but she should still know so he can sort it if that's the case.
Good luck.. Xx |
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The girl I know who he spoke to doesn't think it's her business which is fair enough. She isn't pals with either of them. Just knew him from school.
She has told me and it's up to me if I tell my friend. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The girl I know who he spoke to doesn't think it's her business which is fair enough. She isn't pals with either of them. Just knew him from school.
She has told me and it's up to me if I tell my friend. "
See already it’s too he said she said for me. I’d stay well clear if I was you. |
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By *zoreanMan
over a year ago
Witney |
Oh boy, the old can of worms....same people all over again voting against and same people voting in favour... God these forums are getting so old. 
Just do whatever you want to do...if you need a forum to help you make a decision then you're most likely doing it wrong, follow your guts. |
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Yeh he's clearly deleted the app in a panic she will tell me he's on there. So he's obviously guilty and didn't want caught.
That to me makes me think she deserves to know. Because how many other girls has he chatted to on there or potentially met up with.
So tricky |
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If you were my friend and I was in that situation, I'd want you to tell me.
If I were him, I'd be expecting her to find out at somepoint, as it's only a matter of time till more of her friends see him. |
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Interesting dilemma.
I wonder how many men are on here without their wives knowing.
Send it to her anonymously and be her shoulder to cry on. After two months tell her how you feel about her. And Bingo she is yours.
During those two months while you are waiting it might be worth putting a profile on a dating app. She will never know....and it's not as if your dating yet... |
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"Interesting dilemma.
I wonder how many men are on here without their wives knowing.
Send it to her anonymously and be her shoulder to cry on. After two months tell her how you feel about her. And Bingo she is yours.
During those two months while you are waiting it might be worth putting a profile on a dating app. She will never know....and it's not as if your dating yet... "
He doesn’t want to be with her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No keep out of it. Unless you grew up with her like she was a sister. Family is the only time I think I would intervene and even then reluctantly. The little glow you might get from being helpful won't last long. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You know nothing about this. Could be an old profile from when they were split up... she could not be on the same page as him and living in hope... they could swing... could even be an old screen shot.
Mind your own business and tell your friend too aswell. If they have a problem they should go to him... not to you to go to her.
You're just a middle man. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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don't bother saying owt, life's hard enough without someone else's shite on your hands.
Anyway, Chances are if the shoe was on the other foot they'd not bother telling you.
Pays to be selfish 99% of the time
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From another angle, You can't be 100% sure this profile isn't a catfish, the person may have deleted the app after being sussed out he wasn't who he was supposed to be.
Personally I'd keep out of it, could get messy unless you are 100% it's definitely him and have more than a photo to prove it was him.
My two pence worth  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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100% tell her. Be non judgemental, show her the screenshot and say you wanted her to have all the information but support her whatever she decides.
I was with someone where my gut told me he was cheating but I never had any proof. He managed to convince me I was the problem and my self esteem and mental health plummeted. Finally I found out I was right - I just wish someone had told me sooner. |
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"100% tell her. Be non judgemental, show her the screenshot and say you wanted her to have all the information but support her whatever she decides.
I was with someone where my gut told me he was cheating but I never had any proof. He managed to convince me I was the problem and my self esteem and mental health plummeted. Finally I found out I was right - I just wish someone had told me sooner."
Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So hopefully this won't get too controversial.
But I have a friend (female) who has been with her boyfriend a long time.
Not an open relationship or anything. However before lockdown they had a few ups and downs. They are still together, I asked how they are and she says they are fine now and are back looking at houses.
However someone I know also knows her boyfriend. And has seen him on a dating app. He told her he was single a couple of days ago.
What would you do? The right thing is surely to tell her as she is your friend. But at the same time could get very messy. "
Is she a best friend ? And is it 100% true x |
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I'd do more with my best friend than I would with others. Generally it's wise to stay out of it. I'd probably give a general, vague guide to them to ensure that they are being fully honest with each other about trying to meet others |
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By *abonWoman
over a year ago
L’boro/Ashby & Cheltenham |
I’ve been in this situation. I called my friend (hadn’t chatted in a while) to generally ask how she was doing. She opened up saying marriage struggling, they were trying to fix things. At that point I had to tell her I’d seen a profile on tinder saying he was already single, and ready to date! He’d cheated on her before and screwed her financially so she needed to know.
I wasn’t judgemental, and she took another year to finally leave him, but she was grateful I told her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just say look someone I know has sent me this and now I’ve seen it I can’t unsee it. I would hate for you to find out and know that I knew but didn’t tell you.
Do what you want with the information, I won’t judge you. |
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"Why do you have to tell her? Tell him
But surely he will just lie and le his way out of it. Liars lie don’t they. "
,
Yep and he'll lie to her too if the op tells her and she confronts him. If it is him. |
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"Why do you have to tell her? Tell him
But surely he will just lie and le his way out of it. Liars lie don’t they. ,
Yep and he'll lie to her too if the op tells her and she confronts him. If it is him. "
It's second hand information after all |
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Think if was me I’d like to know. I’ve been cheated on myself in the past. Your friend might be wasting her time in relationship if her boyfriend is already looking elsewhere, better to get out now. Granted not a ideal situation for you o/p tho |
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The op hasn't seen him on a dating site, someone else has. I'd be very hesitant to tell a friend something I hadn't actually seen for myself. Without witnessing it personally it's just gossip, the only person I would tell would be the man himself. |
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When I was cheated on it turned my world upside down. It wasn't the cheating itself that caused me problems it was the lies, the deception and the fact other people knew and didn't tell me.
I knew in my gut it was happening but everything had an excuse, every disappearance had a "valid reason" and some of those were using mutual friends as scapegoats.
He was absolutely adamant even when I kicked him out that he hadn't cheated, that he was innocent.
15 months later the woman he WAS cheating on me with came to me cos they had split up, she told me everything, which all added up to those times I knew in my gut it was happening.
I asked her why he didn't just leave and live with her, why wait for me to kick him out?
..... "because he wanted to make your life so miserable you either killed yourself or kicked him out so he could be the victim"
From that point I had no idea who I could trust, I had no idea what from the last 11 years had been real and what hadn't. It knocked me badly. My confidence and trust in others hit the deck, to the point I had a full on breakdown and was off work for 9 months.
That's my story. I couldn't let someone else go through what I went through.
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"When I was cheated on it turned my world upside down. It wasn't the cheating itself that caused me problems it was the lies, the deception and the fact other people knew and didn't tell me.
I knew in my gut it was happening but everything had an excuse, every disappearance had a "valid reason" and some of those were using mutual friends as scapegoats.
He was absolutely adamant even when I kicked him out that he hadn't cheated, that he was innocent.
15 months later the woman he WAS cheating on me with came to me cos they had split up, she told me everything, which all added up to those times I knew in my gut it was happening.
I asked her why he didn't just leave and live with her, why wait for me to kick him out?
..... "because he wanted to make your life so miserable you either killed yourself or kicked him out so he could be the victim"
From that point I had no idea who I could trust, I had no idea what from the last 11 years had been real and what hadn't. It knocked me badly. My confidence and trust in others hit the deck, to the point I had a full on breakdown and was off work for 9 months.
That's my story. I couldn't let someone else go through what I went through.
"
Yes a terrible ordeal you went through with him If he can do what he did to you no doubt he,ll do it again to someone else and perhaps more people to think people like him exist in the outside world is scary thou they have always existed it certainly shows a very dark side of the human psyche.  |
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Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
The reason I was unsure about getting involved is she's a good friend and I don't want to break her heart. But I feel she deserves to know |
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"Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
The reason I was unsure about getting involved is she's a good friend and I don't want to break her heart. But I feel she deserves to know "
And make her own mind up. I'm not going to tell her to do anything. Purely just give her the info and then it's up for her/ them to work out or decide what to do.
If I tell him he will deny point blank. |
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By *mberWoman
over a year ago
Preston |
I'd tell her. I wouldn't make a huge deal of it but I'd pass the info on.
If I found out a friend knew about a partner cheating but didn't tell me I don't think I could be friends with them any more.
If it's innocent (which it's not) then he can explain it.
The question I'd ask is "if she were my sister would I want someone to tell her?"
Good luck OP in whatever you decide |
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"Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
The reason I was unsure about getting involved is she's a good friend and I don't want to break her heart. But I feel she deserves to know
And make her own mind up. I'm not going to tell her to do anything. Purely just give her the info and then it's up for her/ them to work out or decide what to do.
If I tell him he will deny point blank."
how can he if you have screen shots?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
"
I think showing screenshots sounds really vindictive |
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"Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
I think showing screenshots sounds really vindictive "
There's nothing vindictive about it. I'm just trying to look out for a friend. Nothing more. I'm not out to ruin the relationship. But as my friend I feel she deserves to know and then make her own mind up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
I think showing screenshots sounds really vindictive
There's nothing vindictive about it. I'm just trying to look out for a friend. Nothing more. I'm not out to ruin the relationship. But as my friend I feel she deserves to know and then make her own mind up. "
You're not exactly going to be doing anything positive for the relationship |
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"Sorry just on the ones that say she won't believe me or its hearsay. I have screenshots so it's true and I have the evidence as such.
I think showing screenshots sounds really vindictive
There's nothing vindictive about it. I'm just trying to look out for a friend. Nothing more. I'm not out to ruin the relationship. But as my friend I feel she deserves to know and then make her own mind up.
You're not exactly going to be doing anything positive for the relationship "
No but I might for her long term future |
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"Sure you don't have feelings for her yourself? Sounds a bit like you do.
I'm sure. I actually thought he was a decent guy. And perhaps they can work it out. Not in this for myself....."
you're in a difficult position. All you can do is what you think is best |
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I would rather know..nothing worse than finding out somethings been going on for months under your nose..and the longer you leave it while knowing the bigger the fall out would be if she found out you knew! If this is someone you care about then its your duty to tell her. |
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I started chattin yo someone on here the other week who was telling me some fella started chattin him up on here askin yo meet him n stuff
Wen he went on his profile reckonised his face
Turnes out the fella who has been chaatin to him is the bf of this ones good mate who he has known her since school
She loves the bobes of him lookin to move in together but he is chattin him up
Now he is the same doesnt know wether to tell her her fella is chattin him up on here,
Of which he has told her he is on here
Or does he mention to him that his gf is this ones best mate.
Im the same really n stay out of it
Even tho good mates
Its their lives to sort out
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Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago
Doire Theas |
"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
So glad to hear this you definitely done the right thing she deserved to know  |
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By *mberWoman
over a year ago
Preston |
"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
I'm glad you made the right choice for you and your friend. She can go forward making an informed choice now. |
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
Glad you didn't listen to the 'not my business' posters.
If you have a good friend, you look out for them. That's your business. |
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
blimey that all happened quickly. I hope it works out ok for both of them whatever they decide to do.
One of the reasons we try to ensure that we meet genuinely single men is because we don't want to enable situations like this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
Ah I’m proud of you! Well done. It’s not easy being the one to tell someone bad news, but you’re right - it was the right thing to do. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Imagine they split up and she finds out you knew and net told her , how would you feel?
For me if she’s close I’d tell her what you know and who told you , it’s about where you loyalty lies and how much of a friend you are
If you just want to stay out of it that’s fine, I’d do that if I didn't care much about the people involved |
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
Ah I’m proud of you! Well done. It’s not easy being the one to tell someone bad news, but you’re right - it was the right thing to do. "
I'm proud of you too, I wish I had a friend like you when I was being manipulated, deceived and told I was crazy.
I always say, I'd rather be stung by the truth than stabbed in the back by a lie.
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Tell her. If you have some form of reasonable evidence (screenshot etc).
What’s worse, a difficult conversation now, or trying to support your friend through a breakup and a house sale, maybe even a divorce? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell her. If you have some form of reasonable evidence (screenshot etc).
What’s worse, a difficult conversation now, or trying to support your friend through a breakup and a house sale, maybe even a divorce? "
Perhaps he'll still have to support her through the breakup now that he has told her |
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
Right decision. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You want her OP"
What makes you think he ‘wants’ her?
Because he is friends with her and showed her proof her boyfriend was cheating? You reckon he had an ulterior motive for doing this?
Maybe, just *maybe* some men are friends with women because...they enjoy their friendship! A platonic friendship! Not every man befriends women to fuck them, then moan about the ‘friend zone’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You want her OP
What makes you think he ‘wants’ her?
Because he is friends with her and showed her proof her boyfriend was cheating? You reckon he had an ulterior motive for doing this?
Maybe, just *maybe* some men are friends with women because...they enjoy their friendship! A platonic friendship! Not every man befriends women to fuck them, then moan about the ‘friend zone’"
Fake news...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
Ah I’m proud of you! Well done. It’s not easy being the one to tell someone bad news, but you’re right - it was the right thing to do.
I'm proud of you too, I wish I had a friend like you when I was being manipulated, deceived and told I was crazy.
I always say, I'd rather be stung by the truth than stabbed in the back by a lie.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just for those who wanted to know. Spoke to my friend and told her.
She has confronted her bf and despite initially denying he then admitted once she showed him the screenshots.
She said she really appreciated me telling her and we are all good.
What happens going forward is up to her. But definitely was the right thing to do.
"
You are a great friend. She is lucky to have you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Get a SIM card from the shop for 99p put in in your phone and send her the details she will not know it was you. She will have the proof of what he is doing |
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"So hopefully this won't get too controversial.
But I have a friend (female) who has been with her boyfriend a long time.
Not an open relationship or anything. However before lockdown they had a few ups and downs. They are still together, I asked how they are and she says they are fine now and are back looking at houses.
However someone I know also knows her boyfriend. And has seen him on a dating app. He told her he was single a couple of days ago.
What would you do? The right thing is surely to tell her as she is your friend. But at the same time could get very messy. "
Unless you can benefit the situation, I would keep quiet.
Is it your business to get involved?
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"So hopefully this won't get too controversial.
But I have a friend (female) who has been with her boyfriend a long time.
Not an open relationship or anything. However before lockdown they had a few ups and downs. They are still together, I asked how they are and she says they are fine now and are back looking at houses.
However someone I know also knows her boyfriend. And has seen him on a dating app. He told her he was single a couple of days ago.
What would you do? The right thing is surely to tell her as she is your friend. But at the same time could get very messy.
Unless you can benefit the situation, I would keep quiet.
Is it your business to get involved?
"
Unless you can benefit from the situation 
You know what? If you have absolute proof, then why turn a blind eye.
People die every day because others turn a blind eye. People get abused because others turn a blind eye.
People get taken for cunts because others turn a blind eye.
People get away with murder because others turn a blind eye.
I'm not suggesting we all start spying on our neighbours and attempt to change the world by actively looking for things to preach about or "interfere" with, but.... if we all open our eyes just a little bit wider then maybe, just maybe we can change the world for a few.
If telling someone the truth means I potentially lose a friend, well, I'd rather lose a friend and KNOW it was because I cared for them and was brave enough to stand up for their future, cos that's what you're doing when passing on the knowledge, you're standing up for them. You're giving them the information that gives them choice.
If you're mate was getting ripped off by someone financially most people would point it out, yet when people are getting ripped off emotionally is "ohhhhh fuck all to do with me lalallalalalala"
I just can't imagine going to a friends funeral and thinking to myself "awwww bless them, they dedicated their life to someone who was taking them for a fool, but at least it's over now and ya know, what they didn't know didn't hurt them. Rest in peace"
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I still find it difficult to accept that the first choice in these cases is to tell the partner rather than the person themselves. What's the reasoning behind that? I know that "he will just deny it" is the stock answer but how do you know that? How can you predict how that person will react?
Also in this age of stolen identity with pictures easily available to copy how on earth is it possible to verify that it's actually that person behind the profile?
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Rem_mber that if they remain together you will no longer be friends.