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‘Relationships’
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By *hubaysi OP Woman
over a year ago
Leeds |
Fabbers,
Thinking about my last few forum threads in particular what are guys looking for on Fab and the responses I received.
Is it only ladies on here who are looking for a life relationship with someone? I don’t mean a FWB.
Guys say they want non complicated fun and saying no relationships at the start. Why is this?
Do people from Fab actually end up in a life relationship?
Bhubaysi x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fabbers,
Thinking about my last few forum threads in particular what are guys looking for on Fab and the responses I received.
Is it only ladies on here who are looking for a life relationship with someone? I don’t mean a FWB.
Guys say they want non complicated fun and saying no relationships at the start. Why is this?
Do people from Fab actually end up in a life relationship?
Bhubaysi x
"
I am not actively seeking one but if you met the right woman I’d be a fool to not give it a go. |
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There are a few men on here looking for proper relationships, many don't put it on their profile and you only find out when chatting, its mildly annoying as that's the opposite of what I want and spending a few days chatting until they admit it is wasting both of our time |
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I think it's not just Fab, it's throughout the country and possibly throughout the world.
An old man once said to me that women use sex as a hook, to get a relationship. I've also heard a saying; "Women use sex to get a relationship, and men use a relationship to get sex.".
Whatever people say, my experience is that a lot of women seem to link sex with commitment/emotions which is then geared towards a relationship. Like as if a relationship is the ultimate goal.
In the past, sex has got me into a lot of hassle for this very reason. The women who I've been with, some got obsessed and then started taking liberties. It's like as if some women are desperate for a relationship. If you fall for that, they then start to try to trap you and control you like as if you belong to them. Before you know it you're dealing with their insecurities and stepping on eggshells all the time. I can just do without the hassle. If you don't accept the pushes for a relationship, they often get very angry and start getting very bitter towards you. It's just better to be clear at the start and say 'no relationships'.
I don't know though. Not all women are like that. I imagine not all men are like that either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not sure if it’s just guys to answer? But for me personally I don’t want a relationship From here tbh I don’t ever want a relationship My life is far to busy for all of that although if a relationship was on the cards then maybe would have to be someone from here as they would be on my level and hopefully I could still do what I love with my new partner included
I have know lots of friends from here getting into relationships with people from here and from my point of view its seemed to have worked for them "
I couldn't have typed this better myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I weren’t happily in a relationship with my wonderful hubby I’d probably be open to having a relationship with someone on here. At least then I could guarantee they were on the same sexual wavelength as I am. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around."
I had a relationship with a man from here, and he did indeed, fuck around. The stupid thing was, he had permission with prior knowledge anyway, but still chose to lie about it. Maybe he was addicted to the kick he got from deceiving me, I dont know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They can. I definitely have, and a really great one at the time!
Does it matter what ppl say they want anyway? Surely you don't know what you want with someone until you've met them? If you go into it with unrealistic expectations then youre likely to come out disappointed.... ....modern fabbing seems to have a 100 page tick box questionnaire to complete and if you're forced to tick a box that you're unsure about then it's not very helpful to anyone.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around.
I don’t trust men not to fuck around full stop. "
How lovely, yes we are all the same, we speak as one! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fabbers,
Thinking about my last few forum threads in particular what are guys looking for on Fab and the responses I received.
Is it only ladies on here who are looking for a life relationship with someone? I don’t mean a FWB.
Guys say they want non complicated fun and saying no relationships at the start. Why is this?
Do people from Fab actually end up in a life relationship?
Bhubaysi x
"
You have been here long enough to know that there have been marriages between people who met on fab...
Also i think women are far more honest about what they want whereas men just tend to go with the flow...
Obviously there are the ones who definitely don't want a relationship.. (because they are already attached)... but i think deep down they want a relationship, they are just too scared to admit it |
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By *hubaysi OP Woman
over a year ago
Leeds |
"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around.
I don’t trust men not to fuck around full stop.
How lovely, yes we are all the same, we speak as one! "
Only my opinion because of experiences but no offence was meant to you..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around."
But you'd expect them to trust you, and you're here....? |
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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago
London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact |
If you click with someone, sure. But the default starting point to say that you are not looking for anything from the onset gives the man a get out clause to commit to anything more serious. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around.
But you'd expect them to trust you, and you're here....? "
Why would I want them to trust me? I wouldn't be with them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around.
But you'd expect them to trust you, and you're here....?
Why would I want them to trust me? I wouldn't be with them. "
Jesus.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around.
But you'd expect them to trust you, and you're here....?
Why would I want them to trust me? I wouldn't be with them.
Jesus.... "
What don't you understand? |
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around."
But--if you meet someone from elsewhere, what guarantee do they have that YOU won't fuck around (as you're on here)? This is not directed specifically at you. I mean regarding anyone on here as a single person.
I think there's always an element of trust that needs to be established in any relationship, no matter where you meet.
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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Yes they do, to varying degrees of success. I think it's kind of like anywhere. Some relationships work, some don't. Sometimes people are really clear that that's what they want, other times they aren't. I've seen men looking for relationships, I think there does tend to be more women though (I'm not sure why that is). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't ever have a relationship with someone on here!! I wouldn't trust them not to fuck around.
But you'd expect them to trust you, and you're here....?
Why would I want them to trust me? I wouldn't be with them.
Jesus....
What don't you understand? "
What don't I understand? You appear to be saying it's ok for you to be on fab and still be trustworthy but others here can't be trusted just because they're here? Unless you're saying you're also not trustworthy...? Such a positive outlook on life! * Shrugs *
Anyway I've nothing to add to that. Have a great Friday and weekend |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would be open to a relationship. I’ve never hidden that fact, I’m looking to be married by the end of play 31/12/20.
I get A LOT of people saying ‘you’re so nice I wish I hadn’t met you on here otherwise I’d date you’ which makes me think there’s still a bit of slut shaming going on, and some guys have hang ups about women being on here.
Obviously that doesn’t apply to all guys before anyone jumps down my throat. Just some guys that I’ve spoken with |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not here looking for a relationship anymore than I am when I'm out shopping or at a pub etc. But you can never say you won't meet someone you just click with while on Fab. The question surely is whether you're open to a relationship or not, not where you find someone? |
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"I would be open to a relationship. I’ve never hidden that fact, I’m looking to be married by the end of play 31/12/20.
I get A LOT of people saying ‘you’re so nice I wish I hadn’t met you on here otherwise I’d date you’ which makes me think there’s still a bit of slut shaming going on, and some guys have hang ups about women being on here.
Obviously that doesn’t apply to all guys before anyone jumps down my throat. Just some guys that I’ve spoken with "
Nooooo really? That's so sad in this day and age.. and hello.. they are on here as well... If your like me your on here because you haven't met the right guy.. but what your supposed to remain a nun in the meantime... I did that for two years prior to being on here... It's not fun lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would be open to a relationship. I’ve never hidden that fact, I’m looking to be married by the end of play 31/12/20.
I get A LOT of people saying ‘you’re so nice I wish I hadn’t met you on here otherwise I’d date you’ which makes me think there’s still a bit of slut shaming going on, and some guys have hang ups about women being on here.
Obviously that doesn’t apply to all guys before anyone jumps down my throat. Just some guys that I’ve spoken with "
Yes! I like you and we got on but we met on fab...?! Sooooo |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would be open to a relationship. I’ve never hidden that fact, I’m looking to be married by the end of play 31/12/20.
I get A LOT of people saying ‘you’re so nice I wish I hadn’t met you on here otherwise I’d date you’ which makes me think there’s still a bit of slut shaming going on, and some guys have hang ups about women being on here.
Obviously that doesn’t apply to all guys before anyone jumps down my throat. Just some guys that I’ve spoken with "
Frustrating, but also a bullet dodged. |
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By *hubaysi OP Woman
over a year ago
Leeds |
"I would be open to a relationship. I’ve never hidden that fact, I’m looking to be married by the end of play 31/12/20.
I get A LOT of people saying ‘you’re so nice I wish I hadn’t met you on here otherwise I’d date you’ which makes me think there’s still a bit of slut shaming going on, and some guys have hang ups about women being on here.
Obviously that doesn’t apply to all guys before anyone jumps down my throat. Just some guys that I’ve spoken with "
I have had this from someone I thought would not be as judgemental. Apparently women on Fab or who go to swinging clubs are not worthy of being in a relationship because they have shagged a few guys. Yes some male chauvinists exist in 2020! Btw this man I mention is not on Fab so he will not see this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not here looking for a relationship anymore than I am when I'm out shopping or at a pub etc. But you can never say you won't meet someone you just click with while on Fab. The question surely is whether you're open to a relationship or not, not where you find someone?"
Not really. Some people just don't want to date swingers. |
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"I'm not here looking for a relationship anymore than I am when I'm out shopping or at a pub etc. But you can never say you won't meet someone you just click with while on Fab. The question surely is whether you're open to a relationship or not, not where you find someone?"
|
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"Guys say they want non complicated fun and saying no relationships at the start. Why is this?"
Because captial-R Relationships are *significantly* easier to find than uncomplicated fun. You don't need to come to a specialist networking site like this one to find them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it's not just Fab, it's throughout the country and possibly throughout the world.
An old man once said to me that women use sex as a hook, to get a relationship. I've also heard a saying; "Women use sex to get a relationship, and men use a relationship to get sex.".
Whatever people say, my experience is that a lot of women seem to link sex with commitment/emotions which is then geared towards a relationship. Like as if a relationship is the ultimate goal.
In the past, sex has got me into a lot of hassle for this very reason. The women who I've been with, some got obsessed and then started taking liberties. It's like as if some women are desperate for a relationship. If you fall for that, they then start to try to trap you and control you like as if you belong to them. Before you know it you're dealing with their insecurities and stepping on eggshells all the time. I can just do without the hassle. If you don't accept the pushes for a relationship, they often get very angry and start getting very bitter towards you. It's just better to be clear at the start and say 'no relationships'.
I don't know though. Not all women are like that. I imagine not all men are like that either."
True.
I don't think I'll be in a relationship again.
I'm not going to say never - because you never know right
I dont find being in a couple easy like some people do - and I find men difficult to trust - I have been known to turn into that emotional wreck you speak of in this thoughtful post.
Men feel trapped - they find it difficult to be open and honest - women feel neglected and that's when the 'single male ' profiles happen on Fab.
No thanks
Disclaimer - this is a tongue in cheek post and isn't meant to start some ridiculous gender war
Ta |
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"I think it's not just Fab, it's throughout the country and possibly throughout the world.
An old man once said to me that women use sex as a hook, to get a relationship. I've also heard a saying; "Women use sex to get a relationship, and men use a relationship to get sex.".
Whatever people say, my experience is that a lot of women seem to link sex with commitment/emotions which is then geared towards a relationship. Like as if a relationship is the ultimate goal.
In the past, sex has got me into a lot of hassle for this very reason. The women who I've been with, some got obsessed and then started taking liberties. It's like as if some women are desperate for a relationship. If you fall for that, they then start to try to trap you and control you like as if you belong to them. Before you know it you're dealing with their insecurities and stepping on eggshells all the time. I can just do without the hassle. If you don't accept the pushes for a relationship, they often get very angry and start getting very bitter towards you. It's just better to be clear at the start and say 'no relationships'.
I don't know though. Not all women are like that. I imagine not all men are like that either."
I'm sorry to say that I've had this experience too. It's very disappointing, even upsetting, to find out that the wonderful, joyous sex I had with someone was just a means to an end for them; a tool they used to attempt to manipulate me into a situation that would only make me miserable. I'm a living being with needs and appetites, not a sexless accessory in someone else's fantasy of "domestic bliss". Eugh. |
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