FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you actually like fighting.....?
Do you actually like fighting.....?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Neither of us like confrontation. I (her) will always stand up on behalf of others when they are being treated unfairly, yet I don't always do it for myself.
Confrontational situations affect me for days after as I replay the scene over and over in my mind, I become an emotional soppy heap.
Her x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Neither of us like confrontation. I (her) will always stand up on behalf of others when they are being treated unfairly, yet I don't always do it for myself.
Confrontational situations affect me for days after as I replay the scene over and over in my mind, I become an emotional soppy heap.
Her x"
I hear ya! 
For me the energy drain depends who I'm arguing with and how much they orvthe issue matters to me and whether they genuinely want to hurt me or if it's just a misunderstanding... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No, not really. Like the perv up there, I love the make up sex. The rest of it makes me really anxious and emotional and uncertain so I try and avoid it as much as possible."
Isn't it the same with everyone? They just get scareder (I don't think that's a word) and scareder (but I used it again) and back themselves into a corner where they can't back down without looking like a dick, but then arguing on often has the same effect.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No, not really. Like the perv up there, I love the make up sex. The rest of it makes me really anxious and emotional and uncertain so I try and avoid it as much as possible.
Isn't it the same with everyone? They just get scareder (I don't think that's a word) and scareder (but I used it again) and back themselves into a corner where they can't back down without looking like a dick, but then arguing on often has the same effect...."
I think some people love arguing to be fair and it doesn't affect them in a way that makes them anxious or scared.
I'm similar to Meli, I hate fighting. I think life is too short for fights and arguments but some people seem to live for it. I try to cut out people like that as they're so toxic and they effect my mental health too much.
I've been with my partner over a decade and I could count the number of arguments we have had on one hand. I've grown up in a house where everyone was always fighting and I won't settle for that ever. |
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It depends.
If a person in the street attacked me then damn right I'll fight .
If someone say , kicked my dog , I'd kick the living shit out of them .
On the whole though , I'm way too placid to fight for the sake of it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I used to do it for fun. Adrenaline rush is amazing. Fear before hand isn't so nice though. 
Hooligan
Sometimes 
I meant in the ring though"
Ahhhhh. I take it back then  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I used to do it for fun. Adrenaline rush is amazing. Fear before hand isn't so nice though. "
It's funny, I hadn't even thought of the physical option when writing this thread.... I was just thinking about all the bellends arguing lately rampantly and consumingly over things and wondering if it was for them or THEM or US..... |
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By *estivalMan
over a year ago
borehamwood |
"I don't....
Let's make up and be friends....
Nip x
"
arguing or fighting? i dont mind an argument fighting on the other hand id rather not but if someone does kick off with me im not shy about having a punch up.some you win some you lose |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm feisty not fighty
This . Never had a fight in my life (physical)
really?not even schooldays? "
Nope. Nobody would dare 
Actually if you count my brother I’ve had loads but other than that no. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No one wins when the fighting starts whatever form it takes
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
Dreamer?
I'm not the only one....
"
I think ppl win, but what is winning, what's the prize? |
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By *estivalMan
over a year ago
borehamwood |
"I'm feisty not fighty
This . Never had a fight in my life (physical)
really?not even schooldays?
Nope. Nobody would dare
Actually if you count my brother I’ve had loads but other than that no. "
wow my high school i dont think a cpl of days went past without someone having a punch up and thats including the girls.saying that it was in a rough as shit part of harrow |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm feisty not fighty
This . Never had a fight in my life (physical)
really?not even schooldays?
Nope. Nobody would dare
Actually if you count my brother I’ve had loads but other than that no.
wow my high school i dont think a cpl of days went past without someone having a punch up and thats including the girls.saying that it was in a rough as shit part of harrow"
Oh there was always a scrap after school with someone! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm feisty not fighty
This . Never had a fight in my life (physical)
really?not even schooldays?
Nope. Nobody would dare
Actually if you count my brother I’ve had loads but other than that no.
wow my high school i dont think a cpl of days went past without someone having a punch up and thats including the girls.saying that it was in a rough as shit part of harrow
Oh there was always a scrap after school with someone! "
How did you avoid the scrappage N...? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm feisty not fighty
This . Never had a fight in my life (physical)
really?not even schooldays?
Nope. Nobody would dare
Actually if you count my brother I’ve had loads but other than that no.
wow my high school i dont think a cpl of days went past without someone having a punch up and thats including the girls.saying that it was in a rough as shit part of harrow
Oh there was always a scrap after school with someone!
How did you avoid the scrappage N...?"
Dunno really. I really don’t coz I was just as gobby back then! |
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Physical fighting - make sure you know why and what you are fighting for, and that they are worth the consequences. Better to bow and back away than risk serious outcomes for false pride and loose change.
Discussion (not arguing) is different. We discuss to test our beliefs, to learn to share to challenge. Others may not be so altruistic and argue to control, reinforce and even bully. Ask yourself how much you value their opinion. Would you truly take their advice on buying a house? A car? A packet of biscuits? Then why would you allow their opinion to undermine your confidence in what you think.
Learn to not care about what people you don't care about think |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Physical fighting - make sure you know why and what you are fighting for, and that they are worth the consequences. Better to bow and back away than risk serious outcomes for false pride and loose change.
Discussion (not arguing) is different. We discuss to test our beliefs, to learn to share to challenge. Others may not be so altruistic and argue to control, reinforce and even bully. Ask yourself how much you value their opinion. Would you truly take their advice on buying a house? A car? A packet of biscuits? Then why would you allow their opinion to undermine your confidence in what you think.
Learn to not care about what people you don't care about think "
Debate , it's how you grow as a person. Whisper it though to be heard....
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I've never been in an angry argument or in a fight that was about me, I can always talk my way to reason and negotiation, I've broken plenty up though as it's a handy skill when working in a nightclub 
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I hate fighting and bad feeling with anybody. Making up is always good. But it requires both parties to want the same thing and some people love holding grudges. Fortunately Ailsa and I have always managed to find a way to come back together xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting and bad feeling with anybody. Making up is always good. But it requires both parties to want the same thing and some people love holding grudges. Fortunately Ailsa and I have always managed to find a way to come back together xx"
I think grudges are a waste of energy. What's done is done and if you choose to move forward and resolve something then it helps to have a clean slate to start from.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've never been in an angry argument or in a fight that was about me, I can always talk my way to reason and negotiation, I've broken plenty up though as it's a handy skill when working in a nightclub
"
I definitely see that quality in you my lovely and I'm ever so slightly jealous... x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't fight, I walk away and ignore. Nobody is worth getting upset over. Peace is something to be treasured. It was a hard lesson to learn when you are brought up to fight. So I learnt that lesson the hard way. But I'm glad I know it now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't fight, I walk away and ignore. Nobody is worth getting upset over. Peace is something to be treasured. It was a hard lesson to learn when you are brought up to fight. So I learnt that lesson the hard way. But I'm glad I know it now "
cmon pud em uuuuup  |
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"I hate fighting and bad feeling with anybody. Making up is always good. But it requires both parties to want the same thing and some people love holding grudges. Fortunately Ailsa and I have always managed to find a way to come back together xx
I think grudges are a waste of energy. What's done is done and if you choose to move forward and resolve something then it helps to have a clean slate to start from.... "
Agreed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't fight, I walk away and ignore. Nobody is worth getting upset over. Peace is something to be treasured. It was a hard lesson to learn when you are brought up to fight. So I learnt that lesson the hard way. But I'm glad I know it now cmon pud em uuuuup "
The fight was knocked out of me years ago. When you live with it on a daily basis then you find peace. You appreciate it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't fight, I walk away and ignore. Nobody is worth getting upset over. Peace is something to be treasured. It was a hard lesson to learn when you are brought up to fight. So I learnt that lesson the hard way. But I'm glad I know it now "
I agree on the whole, my home life was all fights, but you can't truly appreciate peace without some chaos... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't fight, I walk away and ignore. Nobody is worth getting upset over. Peace is something to be treasured. It was a hard lesson to learn when you are brought up to fight. So I learnt that lesson the hard way. But I'm glad I know it now cmon pud em uuuuup
The fight was knocked out of me years ago. When you live with it on a daily basis then you find peace. You appreciate it. "
That's why I'm a Nora no mates. Can't be bothered with other people's dramas . But I'm at peace with it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves. "
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....? "
Explain what you mean |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I will stand alone if I believe in something and yes, I'll fight to be heard.
I'll fight with myself at times if I may do something that tests my moral code.
I'll fight for love, but no longer to the detriment of myself.
I was always of the logic that if me standing up for what's true could inspire one other person not to roll over and to be counted, then it's worth the battle.
P
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves. "
So fucking true it's unreal
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean "
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
So fucking true it's unreal
P"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit... "
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P |
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves. "
Agreed. There are those who would rather fight than learn and you prove nothing by being their punch bag. Misguided belief 'I can change them' often ends badly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit... "
I absolutely agree, and that would be great, but actually we have a responsibility to ourselves to do our own work, some people recognise that, some don't, but that's their choice and journey.
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P"
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Physically, I can’t say I like it but I will if I have to although it’s been 6 years now, I’m glad of that as I’ve had 4 concussions in life and I’m not sure my brain can hack another one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive "
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P"
My OP said quite clearly I don't like fighting and let's be friends, so if you don't wanna be friends then you're in the wrong place babe
It's ok not to like someone but it's not ok to try to spoil their healthy positive thread with subtle digs....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P
My OP said quite clearly I don't like fighting and let's be friends, so if you don't wanna be friends then you're in the wrong place babe
It's ok not to like someone but it's not ok to try to spoil their healthy positive thread with subtle digs.... "
Jesus fucking christ I wasn't digging at you, my head is a cunting shed at the moment and I'm making the hardest decision of my life which comes with self reflection and a mountain of heartache but whatever. If you feel that was a dig at you, I apologise, I can only assume that you already have the spade in your hand
Peace out
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P
My OP said quite clearly I don't like fighting and let's be friends, so if you don't wanna be friends then you're in the wrong place babe
It's ok not to like someone but it's not ok to try to spoil their healthy positive thread with subtle digs....
Jesus fucking christ I wasn't digging at you, my head is a cunting shed at the moment and I'm making the hardest decision of my life which comes with self reflection and a mountain of heartache but whatever. If you feel that was a dig at you, I apologise, I can only assume that you already have the spade in your hand
Peace out
P"
Glad to hear it and thanks.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P
My OP said quite clearly I don't like fighting and let's be friends, so if you don't wanna be friends then you're in the wrong place babe
It's ok not to like someone but it's not ok to try to spoil their healthy positive thread with subtle digs....
Jesus fucking christ I wasn't digging at you, my head is a cunting shed at the moment and I'm making the hardest decision of my life which comes with self reflection and a mountain of heartache but whatever. If you feel that was a dig at you, I apologise, I can only assume that you already have the spade in your hand
Peace out
P"
xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m a trained MMA fighter - fought all my life.
Not many know or realise I have social anxiety in big crowds will always try and avoid confrontation. Being 6’3 Irish & well built people try probe a point
I don’t go out much just to avoid people trying to prove their manhood - as for arguments same thing, if you can’t discuss the issue then take yourself away from that person.
Life’s too short for enemies |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’m a trained MMA fighter - fought all my life.
Not many know or realise I have social anxiety in big crowds will always try and avoid confrontation. Being 6’3 Irish & well built people try probe a point
I don’t go out much just to avoid people trying to prove their manhood - as for arguments same thing, if you can’t discuss the issue then take yourself away from that person.
Life’s too short for enemies "
Right on brother! It's a shame you feel like you have to avoid some folk though... |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P"
Keeping it real is about the sum of it - no point dressing something up or putting on a pretence for the sake of appearances.
I'm not a fan of fighting, I usually come off worst, and have learned over the years to walk away and just ignore when I need to but if it's something I believe passionately about or when it comes to debating a point like adults, and I have sufficient self-belief and knowledge to do so then I'll engage so long as it's reasoned and rational. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
We could also try to protect each other too respectfully, then there's hopefully less self protection needed....?
Explain what you mean
Lol I wasn't criticising I promise, more expanding on your point. If we put more effort into looking after each other instead of fighting then we'd need the look out for ourselves less. Like a real community, innit...
Perfect world perhaps but there are always people who will see that vulnerability of looking out for others as a way to manipulate. We all know there are those who will use someones caring nature against them
P
And some who won't.... ....try to stay positive
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P
Keeping it real is about the sum of it - no point dressing something up or putting on a pretence for the sake of appearances.
I'm not a fan of fighting, I usually come off worst, and have learned over the years to walk away and just ignore when I need to but if it's something I believe passionately about or when it comes to debating a point like adults, and I have sufficient self-belief and knowledge to do so then I'll engage so long as it's reasoned and rational."
Thanks Mr, are you open to changing your opinion of someone through discussion and compromise? And allowing them to change theirs of you? |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P
Keeping it real is about the sum of it - no point dressing something up or putting on a pretence for the sake of appearances.
I'm not a fan of fighting, I usually come off worst, and have learned over the years to walk away and just ignore when I need to but if it's something I believe passionately about or when it comes to debating a point like adults, and I have sufficient self-belief and knowledge to do so then I'll engage so long as it's reasoned and rational.
Thanks Mr, are you open to changing your opinion of someone through discussion and compromise? And allowing them to change theirs of you? "
Always open to having my opinion not only of people, but situations, changed. To what degree and how open I am to it depends very much on the individual circumstance though - when you have weighed factors up over a period of time through first hand observation, experience and reliable information from other sources though, it sometimes just won't happen regardless.
It's the nature of the world that you can't expect everyone to get on or everyone to like you - I know I certainly have my detractors in life, and they're perfectly entitled to their opinion, and I accept that totally without feeling the need to change their opinion, because ultimately I can hold my head high and say I'm happy with the person I am, whilst recognising I'm nowhere near perfect and not without my faults. |
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I hate fighting, as I tend not to hit much I try to throttle people.
As for an argument I tend to shy away from them, as I have a very bad temper as well. I do try to reign in it as much as I can, but occasionally it does get free. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
That's why watching and learning is so important. Patterns of behaviour can tell you an awful lot about a person and what's going on behind the scenes.
Good and bad everywhere, but no use in walking round with rose tinted glasses. Gets you in all kinds of bother.
Keeping it real innit.
P
Keeping it real is about the sum of it - no point dressing something up or putting on a pretence for the sake of appearances.
I'm not a fan of fighting, I usually come off worst, and have learned over the years to walk away and just ignore when I need to but if it's something I believe passionately about or when it comes to debating a point like adults, and I have sufficient self-belief and knowledge to do so then I'll engage so long as it's reasoned and rational.
Thanks Mr, are you open to changing your opinion of someone through discussion and compromise? And allowing them to change theirs of you?
Always open to having my opinion not only of people, but situations, changed. To what degree and how open I am to it depends very much on the individual circumstance though - when you have weighed factors up over a period of time through first hand observation, experience and reliable information from other sources though, it sometimes just won't happen regardless.
It's the nature of the world that you can't expect everyone to get on or everyone to like you - I know I certainly have my detractors in life, and they're perfectly entitled to their opinion, and I accept that totally without feeling the need to change their opinion, because ultimately I can hold my head high and say I'm happy with the person I am, whilst recognising I'm nowhere near perfect and not without my faults."
That's a fair comment . I'm not too dissimilar myself. I'm well aware I can rub ppl up the wrong way from time to time and come across as a disruptor, but it's my nature to challenge things and to challenge myself also. Life's too short for anger and hate.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, as I tend not to hit much I try to throttle people.
As for an argument I tend to shy away from them, as I have a very bad temper as well. I do try to reign in it as much as I can, but occasionally it does get free."
Noted... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I’m always partial to wrestling
Pin me down and spank me please? 
Instrument of choice being?
Revolver...."
 no playing with firearms... besides you just need to look pretty and assume the position...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well I’m always partial to wrestling
Pin me down and spank me please?
Instrument of choice being?
Revolver...."
Can you wear a balaclava and stockings and shout "freeze, this is a robbery!" as you do it please....? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well I’m always partial to wrestling
Pin me down and spank me please?
Instrument of choice being?
Revolver....
no playing with firearms... besides you just need to look pretty and assume the position... "
We'll see about that, WON'T WE....! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well I’m always partial to wrestling
Pin me down and spank me please?
Instrument of choice being?
Revolver....
no playing with firearms... besides you just need to look pretty and assume the position...
We'll see about that, WON'T WE....! "
Sorry, correction, we'll see about it WON'T WE, yes Mam....! * |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves. "
This hits the nail on the head for me. Stepping away from those negative/confrontational people/situations I’d the healthiest thing you can do for yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate fighting, don't enjoy any of it, but sometimes it's about realising that you can't always resolve things.
People need to take responsibility for their own actions, and do their own learning, whether they recognise that or not.
And sometimes we need to accept that it's better for us to step away from a dynamic that's unhealthy and bad for us, because ultimately we need to protect ourselves.
This hits the nail on the head for me. Stepping away from those negative/confrontational people/situations I’d the healthiest thing you can do for yourself. "
I was watching one of the race threads self destruct yesterday and thinking exactly this. Nobody was winning, nobody was changing anyone's opinion or learning or educating, just venting and baiting.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I've learnt anything about people with a bad attitude who could cause a row in an empty house. It's that you've only had a glimpse of their world. You can walk away and be happy, but they will always be finding someone else to fight with, their life will not be a happy one and leave them in the knowledge that the hell you felt being in their presence is the hell they will live in untill they learn to change their ways. I bumped into a woman a few weeks ago with that character, when I was early 20's we did physically fight on the street. A few times. Till one day my mum told me not to look at her, if you see her look the other way. What you don't see won't annoy you. Every time I looked at her she would provoke me I'd hit her till I was dragged off her. But from that day and that advice , just don't look and it won't get to you. It worked and I moved on. She has found countless other victims through the years. I had a little inwards smile when I saw her, she hasn't aged very well, her bitter ugly personality has set on her face. She will be 42 this year and no woman welcomes the aging progress before their time. I believe in karma |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I've learnt anything about people with a bad attitude who could cause a row in an empty house. It's that you've only had a glimpse of their world. You can walk away and be happy, but they will always be finding someone else to fight with, their life will not be a happy one and leave them in the knowledge that the hell you felt being in their presence is the hell they will live in untill they learn to change their ways. I bumped into a woman a few weeks ago with that character, when I was early 20's we did physically fight on the street. A few times. Till one day my mum told me not to look at her, if you see her look the other way. What you don't see won't annoy you. Every time I looked at her she would provoke me I'd hit her till I was dragged off her. But from that day and that advice , just don't look and it won't get to you. It worked and I moved on. She has found countless other victims through the years. I had a little inwards smile when I saw her, she hasn't aged very well, her bitter ugly personality has set on her face. She will be 42 this year and no woman welcomes the aging progress before their time. I believe in karma"
Why on earth would I feel happy that someone else was miserable though just because we'd argued....? |
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I used to start a fight on purpose just so we could get to the making up stage yeah fun and games back then
But one day I pushed it too much haven't seen her in 4 years
If only I hadn't been a cunt
Learn from my mistake folks becarful x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I've learnt anything about people with a bad attitude who could cause a row in an empty house. It's that you've only had a glimpse of their world. You can walk away and be happy, but they will always be finding someone else to fight with, their life will not be a happy one and leave them in the knowledge that the hell you felt being in their presence is the hell they will live in untill they learn to change their ways. I bumped into a woman a few weeks ago with that character, when I was early 20's we did physically fight on the street. A few times. Till one day my mum told me not to look at her, if you see her look the other way. What you don't see won't annoy you. Every time I looked at her she would provoke me I'd hit her till I was dragged off her. But from that day and that advice , just don't look and it won't get to you. It worked and I moved on. She has found countless other victims through the years. I had a little inwards smile when I saw her, she hasn't aged very well, her bitter ugly personality has set on her face. She will be 42 this year and no woman welcomes the aging progress before their time. I believe in karma
Why on earth would I feel happy that someone else was miserable though just because we'd argued....? "
Because people like that can't see their way out of it. They go out their way to upset people, they reap what they sow. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I've learnt anything about people with a bad attitude who could cause a row in an empty house. It's that you've only had a glimpse of their world. You can walk away and be happy, but they will always be finding someone else to fight with, their life will not be a happy one and leave them in the knowledge that the hell you felt being in their presence is the hell they will live in untill they learn to change their ways. I bumped into a woman a few weeks ago with that character, when I was early 20's we did physically fight on the street. A few times. Till one day my mum told me not to look at her, if you see her look the other way. What you don't see won't annoy you. Every time I looked at her she would provoke me I'd hit her till I was dragged off her. But from that day and that advice , just don't look and it won't get to you. It worked and I moved on. She has found countless other victims through the years. I had a little inwards smile when I saw her, she hasn't aged very well, her bitter ugly personality has set on her face. She will be 42 this year and no woman welcomes the aging progress before their time. I believe in karma
Why on earth would I feel happy that someone else was miserable though just because we'd argued....?
Because people like that can't see their way out of it. They go out their way to upset people, they reap what they sow. "
I guess if it works for you I'm not gonna argue. Myself I'd rather leave ppl happier than I found them, even the dicks.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to enjoy competitions with kickboxing, I used to enjoy little scraps when I used to play hockey. I can be confrontational but I think that’s cos I’m quite blunt. I’ve stuck a knife in a few footballs as well when they’ve hit my window or my car in the drive and as yet no parent has knocked my door even though the kids will shout I’m gonna tell my mother on you!
I used to be be scrappy in school and have fights on the yard but was never a bully and would often get involved if I saw someone being bullied. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess if it works for you I'm not gonna argue. Myself I'd rather leave ppl happier than I found them, even the dicks....
It does work for me. That was the first time my mind changed and I didn't fight anymore.
I have came across another couple of people of the same ilk over the years and looked away. It's tried tested and proven to be the right thing for me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I used to enjoy competitions with kickboxing, I used to enjoy little scraps when I used to play hockey. I can be confrontational but I think that’s cos I’m quite blunt. I’ve stuck a knife in a few footballs as well when they’ve hit my window or my car in the drive and as yet no parent has knocked my door even though the kids will shout I’m gonna tell my mother on you!
I used to be be scrappy in school and have fights on the yard but was never a bully and would often get involved if I saw someone being bullied. "
So relieved that see it was footballs and not footballers.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who wants a fight
I'll get the talc ....
And I’ll go back to 7 sachets
Those were the days!!! "
Used to love a talc fight. Wasn't to impressed when my kids done it though! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nothing I used to enjoy more than getting smashed with the lads on a weekend and battering some randomer(s) in the club, outside the takeaway or at the taxi rank.
Too be late teens early twenties again...
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Who wants a fight
I'll get the talc ....
And I’ll go back to 7 sachets
Those were the days!!!
Used to love a talc fight. Wasn't to impressed when my kids done it though! "
And the making up after.... x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nothing I used to enjoy more than getting smashed with the lads on a weekend and battering some randomer(s) in the club, outside the takeaway or at the taxi rank.
Too be late teens early twenties again...
"
Glorious.... |
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Used to be a scrapper back in the day. Decided to channel that energy into martial arts instead:ju-jitsu, shotokan karate and finally settled on kick boxing. Retired due to an injury that meant I couldn't compete at the level I wanted to again- British championship level, so did teaching for a few years. Something to tell the grandkids that Nana competed in the British championships....and still has most of her own teeth |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Used to be a scrapper back in the day. Decided to channel that energy into martial arts instead:ju-jitsu, shotokan karate and finally settled on kick boxing. Retired due to an injury that meant I couldn't compete at the level I wanted to again- British championship level, so did teaching for a few years. Something to tell the grandkids that Nana competed in the British championships....and still has most of her own teeth "
Wow that's really cool!
Is it true that controlled fighting helps with discipline outside the ring? My ex. did kick boxing but you'd never have guessed without knowing.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I love a good tussle occasionally. It's good for your mental wellbeing. "
I hate fights, but I kinda agree with you too because it's difficult to enjoy the peace unless you had the drama and chaos.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I love a good tussle occasionally. It's good for your mental wellbeing.
I hate fights, but I kinda agree with you too because it's difficult to enjoy the peace unless you had the drama and chaos.... "
It's all good. Just pick your battles wisely.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I love a good tussle occasionally. It's good for your mental wellbeing.
I hate fights, but I kinda agree with you too because it's difficult to enjoy the peace unless you had the drama and chaos....
It's all good. Just pick your battles wisely. "
Haha, battles and wars... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nothing I used to enjoy more than getting smashed with the lads on a weekend and battering some randomer(s) in the club, outside the takeaway or at the taxi rank.
Too be late teens early twenties again...
"
I hope you're joking! |
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"Used to be a scrapper back in the day. Decided to channel that energy into martial arts instead:ju-jitsu, shotokan karate and finally settled on kick boxing. Retired due to an injury that meant I couldn't compete at the level I wanted to again- British championship level, so did teaching for a few years. Something to tell the grandkids that Nana competed in the British championships....and still has most of her own teeth
Wow that's really cool!
Is it true that controlled fighting helps with discipline outside the ring? My ex. did kick boxing but you'd never have guessed without knowing.... "
It helped me, never used to tell people what I was up to. I would be training with people alot better than me european and world level so that helped. Miss the discipline of the karate most. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Used to be a scrapper back in the day. Decided to channel that energy into martial arts instead:ju-jitsu, shotokan karate and finally settled on kick boxing. Retired due to an injury that meant I couldn't compete at the level I wanted to again- British championship level, so did teaching for a few years. Something to tell the grandkids that Nana competed in the British championships....and still has most of her own teeth
Wow that's really cool!
Is it true that controlled fighting helps with discipline outside the ring? My ex. did kick boxing but you'd never have guessed without knowing....
It helped me, never used to tell people what I was up to. I would be training with people alot better than me european and world level so that helped. Miss the discipline of the karate most."
I wanna get my daughter doing something like that. I'd like her to be able to kick ass.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I like a banter. Hate abuse. It's a fine line!"
It is indeed and often ppl see what they want to in a text comment based on previous rather than how it was intended..... ....I don't think most ppl wake up in the morning wanting to hurt other ppl, shit just gets confusing.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nothing I used to enjoy more than getting smashed with the lads on a weekend and battering some randomer(s) in the club, outside the takeaway or at the taxi rank.
Too be late teens early twenties again...
I hope you're joking!"
Beautiful nip slip! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Used to be a scrapper back in the day. Decided to channel that energy into martial arts instead:ju-jitsu, shotokan karate and finally settled on kick boxing. Retired due to an injury that meant I couldn't compete at the level I wanted to again- British championship level, so did teaching for a few years. Something to tell the grandkids that Nana competed in the British championships....and still has most of her own teeth
Wow that's really cool!
Is it true that controlled fighting helps with discipline outside the ring? My ex. did kick boxing but you'd never have guessed without knowing....
It helped me, never used to tell people what I was up to. I would be training with people alot better than me european and world level so that helped. Miss the discipline of the karate most.
I wanna get my daughter doing something like that. I'd like her to be able to kick ass.... "
Krav Maga is amazing I did that when I first joined the prison service and did it alongside the control and restraint training. Got to P4 grade in Krav but it’s the closest you’ll get to real life situations. Kickboxing is good but in a real life fight there’s no judge and there’s definitely no rules. Krav is all about disarming your opponent using any method, eye gauging, c h o k e s, biting, it’s all about giving you enough time to get away from your attacker. They teach you how to disarm someone with a gun or knife, they teach you what to do if someone tries to jack you in a vehicle, if you’re in a hostage situation, bar brawl, if you’re jumped. We’d fight blind folded and with the lights out in the studio. But you can have all the skills in the world and you’re never completely safe. I remember the first time something ever kicked off in the prison and I peed myself I was so frightened . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Did anyone else watch karate kid as a child and join karate class? I done two nights, found out it was self defence and packed it in. I wanted to kick my brother's arse.
Used to love WWF wrestling then close lining him.
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Did anyone else watch karate kid as a child and join karate class? I done two nights, found out it was self defence and packed it in. I wanted to kick my brother's arse.
Used to love WWF wrestling then close lining him.
"
Wax on, wax off Daniel San. That one legged stalk pose was the best! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did anyone else watch karate kid as a child and join karate class? I done two nights, found out it was self defence and packed it in. I wanted to kick my brother's arse.
Used to love WWF wrestling then close lining him.
Wax on, wax off Daniel San. That one legged stalk pose was the best! "
We've all done that kick. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Used to be a scrapper back in the day. Decided to channel that energy into martial arts instead:ju-jitsu, shotokan karate and finally settled on kick boxing. Retired due to an injury that meant I couldn't compete at the level I wanted to again- British championship level, so did teaching for a few years. Something to tell the grandkids that Nana competed in the British championships....and still has most of her own teeth
Wow that's really cool!
Is it true that controlled fighting helps with discipline outside the ring? My ex. did kick boxing but you'd never have guessed without knowing....
It helped me, never used to tell people what I was up to. I would be training with people alot better than me european and world level so that helped. Miss the discipline of the karate most.
I wanna get my daughter doing something like that. I'd like her to be able to kick ass....
Krav Maga is amazing I did that when I first joined the prison service and did it alongside the control and restraint training. Got to P4 grade in Krav but it’s the closest you’ll get to real life situations. Kickboxing is good but in a real life fight there’s no judge and there’s definitely no rules. Krav is all about disarming your opponent using any method, eye gauging, c h o k e s, biting, it’s all about giving you enough time to get away from your attacker. They teach you how to disarm someone with a gun or knife, they teach you what to do if someone tries to jack you in a vehicle, if you’re in a hostage situation, bar brawl, if you’re jumped. We’d fight blind folded and with the lights out in the studio. But you can have all the skills in the world and you’re never completely safe. I remember the first time something ever kicked off in the prison and I peed myself I was so frightened . "
Fuck me Annie you scare me sometimes, but that sounds really good and practical! I could use a bit of that myself otherwise my daughter would just come home and beat me up.... |
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"Did anyone else watch karate kid as a child and join karate class? I done two nights, found out it was self defence and packed it in. I wanted to kick my brother's arse.
Used to love WWF wrestling then close lining him.
"
Loved karate kid, I made one of the headbands with the rising sun on it... Using permanent ink was a bad idea as when I took it off I had a nice print of the rising sun on my forehead and looked like I had been hit on the forehead by a golf ball for days. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Did anyone else watch karate kid as a child and join karate class? I done two nights, found out it was self defence and packed it in. I wanted to kick my brother's arse.
Used to love WWF wrestling then close lining him.
Loved karate kid, I made one of the headbands with the rising sun on it... Using permanent ink was a bad idea as when I took it off I had a nice print of the rising sun on my forehead and looked like I had been hit on the forehead by a golf ball for days. "
See, fighting is BAD....! |
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