FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Getting the feels
Getting the feels
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Having spent a large part if my swinging life being a part if a couple getting the feels for a new lover was never an issue as I was totally in love with me wife. Now as a single and meeting on my own things are definitely different though I do enjoy the nsa lifestyle and it's all I want how do you stop yourself developing feelings for people other than just lust. ????
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me "
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do"
It’ll match my itchy fanny . Let’s scratch each other’s |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do
It’ll match my itchy fanny . Let’s scratch each other’s "
Babe  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do
It’ll match my itchy fanny . Let’s scratch each other’s
Babe "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do
It’ll match my itchy fanny . Let’s scratch each other’s
Babe
"
I worry about you 2 lol |
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I embrace them, I care deeply for all of my friends and that is what makes our relationships special, nothing better than making love with a close friend, but being able to walk away with a smile on our faces is very important to us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do
It’ll match my itchy fanny . Let’s scratch each other’s
Babe
I worry about you 2 lol"
You should definitely be worried  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When we met as two singles on here,
We had two rules no feeling and no babies.
We still have a 50% success rate on the rules so it’s not all bad 
Love you Mrs Sofa  "
goes many fab children do you now have lol 
Love you 2  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t. I can deal with it. I wouldn’t be having sex with them it I didn’t have some sort of feels for them. But that’s just me. Feelings don’t scare me
Do you like the feel of an itchy fanny? Heard you do
It’ll match my itchy fanny . Let’s scratch each other’s
Babe
I worry about you 2 lol
You should definitely be worried "
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You can't stop yourself developing feelings. I can't see any harm in it unless by feelings you mean love. Personally I can't see myself ever getting to know someone well enough to love them if we were meeting for casual sex and friendship. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Depending who they are, I dont believe feelings can be controlled. If theres that connection then dont over think it. Follow your heart xx "
I'm not saying its happening as such bit I do find with lock down especially that you have more time to talk to people and get to know them far better finding out you have loads in common and have some much you like about each other and u feel drawn to them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Depending who they are, I dont believe feelings can be controlled. If theres that connection then dont over think it. Follow your heart xx I'm not saying its happening as such bit I do find with lock down especially that you have more time to talk to people and get to know them far better finding out you have loads in common and have some much you like about each other and u feel drawn to them "
It's easy to get carried away when things are virtual. Which is why it's sensible to be cautious.
Although a flock of birds might be along in a minute to tell you I'm wrong |
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I don't think you can help feelings, sometimes you just click with someone when you're least expecting it. I'd speak to the other person involved, and if they felt the same way then go with it and see what happens. If they didn't feel the same, then I'm perfectly capable of managing my emotions and realising that people feel differently, I'm not some lovestruck teenager |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Depending who they are, I dont believe feelings can be controlled. If theres that connection then dont over think it. Follow your heart xx I'm not saying its happening as such bit I do find with lock down especially that you have more time to talk to people and get to know them far better finding out you have loads in common and have some much you like about each other and u feel drawn to them
It's easy to get carried away when things are virtual. Which is why it's sensible to be cautious.
Although a flock of birds might be along in a minute to tell you I'm wrong "
very true |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't think you can help feelings, sometimes you just click with someone when you're least expecting it. I'd speak to the other person involved, and if they felt the same way then go with it and see what happens. If they didn't feel the same, then I'm perfectly capable of managing my emotions and realising that people feel differently, I'm not some lovestruck teenager "
sound advice lily I think I actually alittle afraid to feel and not ready to feel yet but as many have said you cant help your feelings but caution is defo needed with anything
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends if you don't mind having your heart broken and feeling like a fool. That shit isn't any fun at all.
If that's a risk you're prepared to take then allow it. If not, don't meet the same person too often, keep communication on site only, and don't do sleepovers.
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Depends if you don't mind having your heart broken and feeling like a fool. That shit isn't any fun at all.
If that's a risk you're prepared to take then allow it. If not, don't meet the same person too often, keep communication on site only, and don't do sleepovers.
P"
a sound bit of advice x |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Sometimes the click happens when you least expect it, and I think that as long as the other person is feeling it too then it's an incredible thing. There's a lot of excitement involved in starting something new as well.
As long as the scary is just scared of the feelings and where it might go and what it might mean, it's a sensible way to be and worth pursuing.
I thought I'd closed off the door to my heart completely to anything deeper than friendship and thrown away the key. Turns out I was wrong and it only takes one person to start nudging at that door. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sometimes the click happens when you least expect it, and I think that as long as the other person is feeling it too then it's an incredible thing. There's a lot of excitement involved in starting something new as well.
As long as the scary is just scared of the feelings and where it might go and what it might mean, it's a sensible way to be and worth pursuing.
I thought I'd closed off the door to my heart completely to anything deeper than friendship and thrown away the key. Turns out I was wrong and it only takes one person to start nudging at that door. "
a very true statement a wise woman you are x |
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If you switch off your feelings completely you become very cold.
Just go with the flow, if you find yourself feeling more than you expected then have the conversation, it may go your way it may not, but you have to be honest with yourself and them. All part of life |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Sometimes the click happens when you least expect it, and I think that as long as the other person is feeling it too then it's an incredible thing. There's a lot of excitement involved in starting something new as well.
As long as the scary is just scared of the feelings and where it might go and what it might mean, it's a sensible way to be and worth pursuing.
I thought I'd closed off the door to my heart completely to anything deeper than friendship and thrown away the key. Turns out I was wrong and it only takes one person to start nudging at that door. a very true statement a wise woman you are x"
I am indeed x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having spent a large part if my swinging life being a part if a couple getting the feels for a new lover was never an issue as I was totally in love with me wife. Now as a single and meeting on my own things are definitely different though I do enjoy the nsa lifestyle and it's all I want how do you stop yourself developing feelings for people other than just lust. ????
"
Feelings are normal are they not? Everyone had their own view of course and that's their right but personally I can't have sex with someone without some kind of connection. That connection will include feelings of some kind including trust, friendship and a level of care and kindness. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Having spent a large part if my swinging life being a part if a couple getting the feels for a new lover was never an issue as I was totally in love with me wife. Now as a single and meeting on my own things are definitely different though I do enjoy the nsa lifestyle and it's all I want how do you stop yourself developing feelings for people other than just lust. ????
Feelings are normal are they not? Everyone had their own view of course and that's their right but personally I can't have sex with someone without some kind of connection. That connection will include feelings of some kind including trust, friendship and a level of care and kindness."
very well said sparkles ps hope your well and lock down isnt to unkind to you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Having spent a large part if my swinging life being a part if a couple getting the feels for a new lover was never an issue as I was totally in love with me wife. Now as a single and meeting on my own things are definitely different though I do enjoy the nsa lifestyle and it's all I want how do you stop yourself developing feelings for people other than just lust. ????
Feelings are normal are they not? Everyone had their own view of course and that's their right but personally I can't have sex with someone without some kind of connection. That connection will include feelings of some kind including trust, friendship and a level of care and kindness. very well said sparkles ps hope your well and lock down isnt to unkind to you x"
Lockdown is a bitch but I'm a bigger bitch |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Having spent a large part if my swinging life being a part if a couple getting the feels for a new lover was never an issue as I was totally in love with me wife. Now as a single and meeting on my own things are definitely different though I do enjoy the nsa lifestyle and it's all I want how do you stop yourself developing feelings for people other than just lust. ????
Feelings are normal are they not? Everyone had their own view of course and that's their right but personally I can't have sex with someone without some kind of connection. That connection will include feelings of some kind including trust, friendship and a level of care and kindness. very well said sparkles ps hope your well and lock down isnt to unkind to you x
Lockdown is a bitch but I'm a bigger bitch "
your not a bitch your one of the nicest people I've ever spoken to on this site x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You need to be able to recognise the difference between emotional attachment and being in love with someone... I have been seeing my fwb for almost 4 years, I told him at the start that I would love him... Sex is better that way... I also told him, I would never be in love with him, as that is not what I want. I am not his ideal woman either and I chose him for exactly that reason, if or when he wants to have a proper gf/wife... It won't be me. You can stop "the feels" it just depends whether you want to or not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I (her) was a single female with a profile on here I would always abide by a personal rule of being able to walk away from someone I played with. This helped me as a reality check to ensure that I wasn't developing feelings for that person and that it was strictly NSA fun.
This personal rule of mine was very successful until I had a first meet with Mr, and all my emotions got entangled with his just as much as our body parts did. The rest is history and we are fortunately blissfully happy together.
When you are attracted to a person through the initial profile, then chatting which leads to flirtation, you're building a connection with the person. Sometimes you know in the back of your mind whether this person is more of a physical attraction and a lust or also an emotional attraction which too can be lustful but also caring and sensual. It's at these times you can check in with yourself "can I walk away?".
If you can't walk away then have a conversation with the person, find out if they feel the same way. Sometimes, the other person may not be feeling quite the same as you and in a way that comes as a blessing in disguise to help you get back your balance but on other instances they may be on the same page as you. What is decided at that crossroads is between the 2 people involved (if it's as straightforward as that).
OP what I hope my response is saying is that there are ways to help you keep your emotions from connecting too much to someone, but also it's not the end of the world if you do care a little more than you should.
I am so thankful that I met a person who I want to share the rest of my life with. I am also thankful to the wonderful lovers I have met, some of which have become great friends.
I have gone on far too much and because I didn't click reply and quote I have no bloody clue whether I have answered your question or not....oh well
Her x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When I (her) was a single female with a profile on here I would always abide by a personal rule of being able to walk away from someone I played with. This helped me as a reality check to ensure that I wasn't developing feelings for that person and that it was strictly NSA fun.
This personal rule of mine was very successful until I had a first meet with Mr, and all my emotions got entangled with his just as much as our body parts did. The rest is history and we are fortunately blissfully happy together.
When you are attracted to a person through the initial profile, then chatting which leads to flirtation, you're building a connection with the person. Sometimes you know in the back of your mind whether this person is more of a physical attraction and a lust or also an emotional attraction which too can be lustful but also caring and sensual. It's at these times you can check in with yourself "can I walk away?".
If you can't walk away then have a conversation with the person, find out if they feel the same way. Sometimes, the other person may not be feeling quite the same as you and in a way that comes as a blessing in disguise to help you get back your balance but on other instances they may be on the same page as you. What is decided at that crossroads is between the 2 people involved (if it's as straightforward as that).
OP what I hope my response is saying is that there are ways to help you keep your emotions from connecting too much to someone, but also it's not the end of the world if you do care a little more than you should.
I am so thankful that I met a person who I want to share the rest of my life with. I am also thankful to the wonderful lovers I have met, some of which have become great friends.
I have gone on far too much and because I didn't click reply and quote I have no bloody clue whether I have answered your question or not....oh well
Her x"
good answer sweet xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As others have said, there is a difference between feeling affection, kindness, fondness etc for someone and the feeling of falling in love.
Some get them confused with each other. I’m pretty cold hearted in the sense of feeling anything deeper for anyone these days which suits me fine. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t really fall for folk on here, i just get dickmatised for a bit and then 3,2,1 i’m back in the room and common sense prevails.
Good sex reels you in. "
dickmatised is that when the guy waves his dick infront of your face and say your under my control and when I click my fingers you will open your mouth lol |
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