FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > White knighting
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " I'll answer this question after I've finished my speedboat ride. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " *unkindness not kindness | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some men are really genuine and actually state their opinions without having hidden agenda. You can spot genuine men when they reply to your thread or stand up for what they believe it is right without texting you after " What if they text you without replying to your thread? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time!" Well not true | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time!" Sounds like quite the story! What if it was a woman being nasty to a man though? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Well not true " What's not true? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Sounds like quite the story! What if it was a woman being nasty to a man though? " I'll leave them to it | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’d say the difference between the two is quite obvious on here. Loads of it at the moment. Not just from men either. It’s entertaining " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’d say the difference between the two is quite obvious on here. Loads of it at the moment. Not just from men either. It’s entertaining " Or maybe I mean lamppost pissing. I get mixed up between the two. Never heard of either till fab! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Well not true What's not true?" Your first point. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some men are really genuine and actually state their opinions without having hidden agenda. You can spot genuine men when they reply to your thread or stand up for what they believe it is right without texting you after What if they text you without replying to your thread? " you can assume that they just want your anus | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) " Quite the irony | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " Incongruous language. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Personally I see more women sticking up for other women. I doubt there's a term for that though x " Women supporting women I love seeing this because you know the intention is pure and less likely to have a hidden agenda other than just making someone feel good about themselves | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Personally I see more women sticking up for other women. I doubt there's a term for that though x Women supporting women I love seeing this because you know the intention is pure and less likely to have a hidden agenda other than just making someone feel good about themselves " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) " I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " Don't you worry your pretty, little head about it. We, men will take care of it! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’d say the difference between the two is quite obvious on here. Loads of it at the moment. Not just from men either. It’s entertaining Or maybe I mean lamppost pissing. I get mixed up between the two. Never heard of either till fab!" Lamppost pissing (cringe term), I see as staking a claim to someone from comments they'll put on threads. White knighting is just sycophantic behaviour where the person intended does virtually no wrong and will always receive a public show of support regardless if its deserved or not. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. Don't you worry your pretty, little head about it. We, men will take care of it! " Awww you really think I'm pretty? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. " Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions . | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’d say the difference between the two is quite obvious on here. Loads of it at the moment. Not just from men either. It’s entertaining Or maybe I mean lamppost pissing. I get mixed up between the two. Never heard of either till fab! Lamppost pissing (cringe term), I see as staking a claim to someone from comments they'll put on threads. White knighting is just sycophantic behaviour where the person intended does virtually no wrong and will always receive a public show of support regardless if its deserved or not." Ah right. I definitely see both of those. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions ." I want one on a horse dressed in white to come and pick me up from work | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions ." That just means they’ve subscribed to the premium white knighthood. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions ." Hadn't thought of this! Maybe there's some sort of nirvana of knighthood all men are secretly trying to attain | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions ." Knight white extra | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’d say the difference between the two is quite obvious on here. Loads of it at the moment. Not just from men either. It’s entertaining Or maybe I mean lamppost pissing. I get mixed up between the two. Never heard of either till fab! Lamppost pissing (cringe term), I see as staking a claim to someone from comments they'll put on threads. White knighting is just sycophantic behaviour where the person intended does virtually no wrong and will always receive a public show of support regardless if its deserved or not." Nah white knighting is defending women for some expected gain or benefit. Also believing the women aren't capable of defending themselves. Which is amusing as it's often something men are accused of when defending women over feminist issues. So these strong independent women they are argueing them to be not only need a man to defend their honour but also are unlikely to see a man only standing up for her to try to get in her pants or something. It does happen but those who go around accusing everyone of it are far more annoying and often more patronising than the so called white knights ever are. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I think sometimes people mix up white knighting and arse kissing. Both happen quite a lot on the forum. On the flip side there are people who just throw out the term white knighting whenever a man posts in support of a woman. " This! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions . I want one on a horse dressed in white to come and pick me up from work " Riding in style Nora! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I think sometimes people mix up white knighting and arse kissing. Both happen quite a lot on the forum. On the flip side there are people who just throw out the term white knighting whenever a man posts in support of a woman. " Agreed. And arse kissing/ white knighting is hardly limited to men towards women. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"It's usually judging others by their own standards. Personally I have to examine what a person's reasons are for saying it. If the person is really doing what they are accusing them of, are women not smart enought to figure that out for themselves and ignore the person or do they need another man to save them from the white night? (Irony much!?) I would like to think so. However sometimes it is said in such a way that you really believe it's true. Or maybe I'm just naive. Even if you are, what do you call the men who jump to your rescue to save you from the white knights? Are they another level of knight? A unicorn knight? Or a double white knight? These are the important questions ." Would they be classed as Kings as once a Knight's never quite enough. Just a thought | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I think sometimes people mix up white knighting and arse kissing. Both happen quite a lot on the forum. On the flip side there are people who just throw out the term white knighting whenever a man posts in support of a woman. This!" Yes. Occasionally men agree with women. Shock. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days." Yeah I’ve heard that a lot. I find that really sad | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some people have no agenda. They are just honest in their opinions and try to be kind and diplomatic. I don’t hang around here enough to tell the difference when people are ‘white knighting’ or ass-kissing, I just take what people say on face value. xx" I tend to start by taking things at face value. Then see how they play out. It's not as though anyone makes all their decisions on meeting anyone based on forum interaction. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. As for the whole white knight thing you are either Damned if you do or damned if you don't. I would assume by now most people would know if we were being White knighted or perhaps we been so locked away by Social media we can't tell one person true meaning or not. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some people have no agenda. They are just honest in their opinions and try to be kind and diplomatic. I don’t hang around here enough to tell the difference when people are ‘white knighting’ or ass-kissing, I just take what people say on face value. xx" | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days." I think some people have just grown up with the ingrained idea that any interaction between men and women has sexual motivations. I think back to school days where any time I talked to a boy my friends would immediately think we fancied each other and start gossiping. The idea that men and women can be platonically respectful towards each other is actually kind of new when you think about it. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. As for the whole white knight thing you are either Damned if you do or damned if you don't. I would assume by now most people would know if we were being White knighted or perhaps we been so locked away by Social media we can't tell one person true meaning or not. " Ok so if men are only friends with you to try and shag you, if I've had male friends turn down sex from me, does that mean I'm really a man? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. " Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. " I think these generalisations are really unfair to men. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. I think these generalisations are really unfair to men." Agreed. Yet they nearly always come from men | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. I think these generalisations are really unfair to men." I have a lot of female friends who I have zero interest in shagging. My closest friend is a lady, and we won’t ever end up in bed together. Opinions such as this are just not true, and are indeed unfair towards men. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. As for the whole white knight thing you are either Damned if you do or damned if you don't. I would assume by now most people would know if we were being White knighted or perhaps we been so locked away by Social media we can't tell one person true meaning or not. " Am I being a white knight by disagreeing with this? This thread is so meta. I don't fancy all the women I know so I don't want to sleep with them all. They're just friends. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"People think too much on the forum, or like to over analyse every little thing. Let people be chivalrous if they want, it harms no one. " I like this stance. And chivalry seems a forgotten art. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. " So you are saying if a female friend of yours was sitting on your sofa and said to you "fuck me right now" you would say no we're just friends. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" On the flip side there are people who just throw out the term white knighting whenever a man posts in support of a woman. " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Hello O.P. People saying that every comment of support by every man that shows support is as unacceptable as people seeing every opposite comment women make as bitchy or jealousy. " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. So you are saying if a female friend of yours was sitting on your sofa and said to you "fuck me right now" you would say no we're just friends. " I think so, although it hasn’t ever happened to me like that to be honest. I’m just saying, you’d have to think blokes were all pretty predatory to say we’d bother to maintain friendships on the off chance of a shag | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. So you are saying if a female friend of yours was sitting on your sofa and said to you "fuck me right now" you would say no we're just friends. " This is implying that all men will have sex with any woman that asks, regardless of attraction, current relationships etc. This is simply not true and an outdated way of thinking. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some people just want to be kind." Some folk are misguided | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"If I like a woman enough to be friends with them then I will want to bang them. If they don't want to bang me then it's just awkward as I still want to bang them so they get weirded out and then we aren't friends anymore. If they do want to bang me and we do it then I'll be friendly afterwards as they've earned my friendship. " ... I wish I could tell whether you're joking or not | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I’d say the difference between the two is quite obvious on here. Loads of it at the moment. Not just from men either. It’s entertaining Or maybe I mean lamppost pissing. I get mixed up between the two. Never heard of either till fab! Lamppost pissing (cringe term), I see as staking a claim to someone from comments they'll put on threads. White knighting is just sycophantic behaviour where the person intended does virtually no wrong and will always receive a public show of support regardless if its deserved or not." Great way to describe it | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Your platonic male friends are trying to shag you, you have just let your friends or the fact you haven't seen anything to lead you to it. all men what pussy weather we have to blow smoke up your arse or remember your mums birthday to get it. Sorry don’t agree with this at all. I think you have to be quite cynical to say we can’t be friends with a woman unless we secretly wanted to shag them. I think these generalisations are really unfair to men. Agreed. Yet they nearly always come from men " Quite. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days." I rarely believe this story when I hear it | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it " Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some people have no agenda. They are just honest in their opinions and try to be kind and diplomatic. I don’t hang around here enough to tell the difference when people are ‘white knighting’ or ass-kissing, I just take what people say on face value. xx" Bingo! Like that post. If it's minor or light hearted banter/jokes then we can all smile at those posts in public forums. However if it's constant pestering towards an individual and getting out of hand I have posted to either divert or diffuse situation. It don't matter if it's for single men, women, couples or if I know them or not. There are those that turn a blind eye and say there is never any negativity going on because they don't want to be seen going against the grain or particular forumites. There are many Fabbers with no agenda or hidden motives. We can all have a good time without stepping on toes. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future)" I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. " More power to you. I guess though, as someone who personally finds it patronising, I wouldn't kick up a stink. I'd smile and say thank you and move on. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Sounds like quite the story! What if it was a woman being nasty to a man though? " It ended with me stamping on a guys head! Nearly killed him. All because he was beating up a girl | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. More power to you. I guess though, as someone who personally finds it patronising, I wouldn't kick up a stink. I'd smile and say thank you and move on." Fair enough. I think sometimes it can be done in a way that's patronising but sometimes it can also be done in a way that's just intended as a mark of respect. As long as it's not when I'm at a distance where I have to do the awkward run/walk so as not to keep the door-opener waiting haha. The worst memory I have of someone holding a door open for me was a nightclub bouncer who then slapped my ass on my way through. That was definitely not respectful | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. More power to you. I guess though, as someone who personally finds it patronising, I wouldn't kick up a stink. I'd smile and say thank you and move on. Fair enough. I think sometimes it can be done in a way that's patronising but sometimes it can also be done in a way that's just intended as a mark of respect. As long as it's not when I'm at a distance where I have to do the awkward run/walk so as not to keep the door-opener waiting haha. The worst memory I have of someone holding a door open for me was a nightclub bouncer who then slapped my ass on my way through. That was definitely not respectful " Sure. It's a matter of preference. I prefer not. It amounts to the same thing for me though. 95% of the time (unless there's an arse slapping or a "little lady" or something else weird going on), I'll smile and say thank you. Life's too short. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. " I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. " Have you missed all the other attitudes they depict in mad men? Cos most of the time, it doesn't show the prevailing attitudes of men towards women in a good light | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"... I suppose I only even talk about it here as a, the rude man eating feminist getting outraged by a man holding a door. I think most consider me into the man eating feminist territory, and I could probably count on one hand I've been anything other than polite to someone holding a door for me. And it's been when they've been creepy or put on some ridiculous theatrics about it. And even then... I've rolled my eyes or told them not to touch me. Not exactly horrific." Not at all. You're perfectly entitled to your opinion regarding this subject without being seen as a raging feminist and I can't speak for everyone but I definitely didn't think that. Like you said, different women have different preferences. I'm not saying I want men to hold doors open for me, I'm just saying that if they did (as an automatic thing instead of a deliberate, "look at how chivalrous I'm being" kind of thing) it would definitely put a little sparkle in my step. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I just try and be a good person and do the right thing. Some people read more into it though. For example, I've opened the door for a woman before and she gave me a scowl. I just thought don't flatter yourself, I'm not nice because I want to get in your knickers. It happens more and more often these days. I rarely believe this story when I hear it Likewise. I'm one of those women who rankles when guys make a show of opening a door for me. I smile and say thank you, because I have manners. (If they're a friend, I ask them not to in future) I disagree... I was watching Mad Men recently which is set in the 60s and noticed all the little things men would do around women ie standing up when they came to the dinner table until they sat down, removing their hats in the presence of a lady, opening car doors etc. Of course I wouldn't ever expect any man to do this for me but I would definitely feel a bit special if he did. Have you missed all the other attitudes they depict in mad men? Cos most of the time, it doesn't show the prevailing attitudes of men towards women in a good light " Yes I was going to add the addendum that on the flip side most of the male characters in MM were cheating on their wives but then thought better than to bring something like that up on a fab forum I do understand that show represented terrible sexist attitudes in the 60s in an unfortunately very realistic way but I was just focusing on the chivalry aspect | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"This thread has given me a complex about doors now, because I hold doors open for everyone Male/female. Isn’t that just what people do? The safest option appears to be slam door in persons face, regardless of gender." No. Hold doors for people. Just be polite. It's not a big deal. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"This thread has given me a complex about doors now, because I hold doors open for everyone Male/female. Isn’t that just what people do? The safest option appears to be slam door in persons face, regardless of gender." To be fair I also hold doors open for both men and women. I think the safest bet is to just go by the distance rule. Are they close enough for you to only have to stand there about a second? Then yes. Otherwise by all means slam that fucker | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"This thread has given me a complex about doors now, because I hold doors open for everyone Male/female. Isn’t that just what people do? The safest option appears to be slam door in persons face, regardless of gender." Also I was referring to date type situations as opposed to just everyday. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Sounds like quite the story! What if it was a woman being nasty to a man though? It ended with me stamping on a guys head! Nearly killed him. All because he was beating up a girl" That sounds a bit unnecessary | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"This thread has given me a complex about doors now, because I hold doors open for everyone Male/female. Isn’t that just what people do? The safest option appears to be slam door in persons face, regardless of gender. Also I was referring to date type situations as opposed to just everyday. " Oh on a date I might playfully say "oh please don't bother with all of that". Playfully. If things keep up I'll explain why. I just like manners, without it being gendered. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Sounds like quite the story! What if it was a woman being nasty to a man though? It ended with me stamping on a guys head! Nearly killed him. All because he was beating up a girl That sounds a bit unnecessary " So does that make you the bigger person for having used violence... to stop violence? Just curious. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! Sounds like quite the story! What if it was a woman being nasty to a man though? It ended with me stamping on a guys head! Nearly killed him. All because he was beating up a girl That sounds a bit unnecessary " He was beating up a girl quite badly, when I stepped into pull him off, he took a swing at me and missed but the girl I was with on her arse. I seen red and kicked off. I used to be an evil cunt.....that incident was a wake up call and changed me! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. " It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly." Absolutely spot on! If I don't get a thank you for being polite, I'm.not best pleased.....again, regardless of gender! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly." | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly." What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! " Sure if you help me to put mine on | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who would have thought holding a door open for another could ever be so controversial.... Still no door on the cave so I'll wander off *shaking head in bemusement " ... I was responding to claims of rudeness re opening doors by saying that I'm not rude... regardless of what I might feel. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! Sure if you help me to put mine on " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! Sure if you help me to put mine on " Haha is it to keep you safe from perving eyes? And protect your modesty ? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! Sure if you help me to put mine on " Equality eh? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! " Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! Sure if you help me to put mine on Equality eh?" Absofuckinglutely! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"There's nothing more attractive than a man who has morals & will stick up for what is right. I've brought up my sons to do just that. I hate bullies. I myself couldn't walk by a fight or bullying without saying something. I'd fight a man () " Nice! If people didn't walk away more bullies would not get away with things. I was once at a huge Fab social, argument/fight broke out and was right in there putting myself literally in harms way to stop it, but then I got pulled away by a friend and told off Still remember that night because only time I witnessed a major incident related to Fab. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me " That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"There's nothing more attractive than a man who has morals & will stick up for what is right. I've brought up my sons to do just that. I hate bullies. I myself couldn't walk by a fight or bullying without saying something. I'd fight a man () Nice! If people didn't walk away more bullies would not get away with things. I was once at a huge Fab social, argument/fight broke out and was right in there putting myself literally in harms way to stop it, but then I got pulled away by a friend and told off Still remember that night because only time I witnessed a major incident related to Fab." Good for you! Unfortunately I've witnessed and been subject to severe bullying within the workplace. Two grown ass men who thought they could intimidate the weak. I wouldn't stand for it hence why one got sacked & the other a final warning. It was a year long battle to get to that point but I won | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
". I do love a bit of this too I have to say. A bit of showmanship. I open doors for people with a flourish sometimes, tis nice. It is nice, regardless of the gender of the person holding the door open or the one it's being held for. I find it somewhat ridiculous when people take offence at a simple act of politeness and courtesy and have to make it about something else - I'll always hold doors open, will always offer to take someone's hand to help them over a fence or whatever, and will always show common and basic courtesy regardless of who they are - if they have a problem with that it's their problem not mine frankly. What about helping to put on a coat? I am not embarrassed to admit I do like these little gestures! Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me " My ONE very specific "polite" thing I don't like is when someone tries to step in when they see me changing a water cooler, especially if it's a man for some reason. Only because I don't like feeling like someone is underestimating my physical strength, but that's a personal hang up that probably comes from being a bigger girl. I do remain polite but also I'm like "thanks but I've got this". Also it always makes me feel good when I manage to do it by myself | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. " Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood " Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too " I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" My ONE very specific "polite" thing I don't like is when someone tries to step in when they see me changing a water cooler, especially if it's a man for some reason. Only because I don't like feeling like someone is underestimating my physical strength, but that's a personal hang up that probably comes from being a bigger girl. I do remain polite but also I'm like "thanks but I've got this". Also it always makes me feel good when I manage to do it by myself " And this is where common sense and a little respect comes in to it - despite the fact that I'll always be courteous and polite towards anyone, and offer to help, I'm also not going to try and patronise by taking a "you're a woman are you sure you can manage" angle - to take your example I might ask if you needed a hand, or if it looked like you were struggling offer to help - but I'm not going to immediately assume you need it and rush over and push you out of the way either. It's about using discretion and common sense nothing more, and that applies regardless of the gender of the person you are helping. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too " Of course you can, we already know we can't win whatever we do. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"There's nothing more attractive than a man who has morals & will stick up for what is right. I've brought up my sons to do just that. I hate bullies. I myself couldn't walk by a fight or bullying without saying something. I'd fight a man () Nice! If people didn't walk away more bullies would not get away with things. I was once at a huge Fab social, argument/fight broke out and was right in there putting myself literally in harms way to stop it, but then I got pulled away by a friend and told off Still remember that night because only time I witnessed a major incident related to Fab. Good for you! Unfortunately I've witnessed and been subject to severe bullying within the workplace. Two grown ass men who thought they could intimidate the weak. I wouldn't stand for it hence why one got sacked & the other a final warning. It was a year long battle to get to that point but I won " Perseverance! Happy days Politics/drama, bullying is common in workplace. You have to stand your ground otherwise people try to take the piss and advantage. Once you show them you ain't a pushover some back off or in extreme circumstances shown the door. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. " My tongue was in my cheek for the avoidance of doubt - sadly there are *some* feminists who do seem to have a problem with chivalry as this thread appears to have shown. And it happening naturally is exactly how it should be - again regardless of the gender of the person doing it or the recipient - comes back to basic common courtesy and decency NOT a man or woman thing in the slightest | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. " And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" My ONE very specific "polite" thing I don't like is when someone tries to step in when they see me changing a water cooler, especially if it's a man for some reason. Only because I don't like feeling like someone is underestimating my physical strength, but that's a personal hang up that probably comes from being a bigger girl. I do remain polite but also I'm like "thanks but I've got this". Also it always makes me feel good when I manage to do it by myself And this is where common sense and a little respect comes in to it - despite the fact that I'll always be courteous and polite towards anyone, and offer to help, I'm also not going to try and patronise by taking a "you're a woman are you sure you can manage" angle - to take your example I might ask if you needed a hand, or if it looked like you were struggling offer to help - but I'm not going to immediately assume you need it and rush over and push you out of the way either. It's about using discretion and common sense nothing more, and that applies regardless of the gender of the person you are helping." Yes it's the latter that annoys me. I have no problem with someone asking if I need a hand as a water cooler is generally a pretty heavy object but 9 times out of 10 (yes I have changed a lot of water coolers) it will be someone physically trying to take it off me because they assume I can't handle it, whether that be because of my sex or physique. When in actual fact I am the Chief Bottle/Jar Opener among most of my social circles | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving." Yes that's why I said "in my opinion". | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving. Yes that's why I said "in my opinion". " I was agreeing with you | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving. Yes that's why I said "in my opinion". I was agreeing with you " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving. Yes that's why I said "in my opinion". I was agreeing with you " Sorry, but saying "you like it, I don't" seems a funny way of agreeing with someone | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" My ONE very specific "polite" thing I don't like is when someone tries to step in when they see me changing a water cooler, especially if it's a man for some reason. Only because I don't like feeling like someone is underestimating my physical strength, but that's a personal hang up that probably comes from being a bigger girl. I do remain polite but also I'm like "thanks but I've got this". Also it always makes me feel good when I manage to do it by myself And this is where common sense and a little respect comes in to it - despite the fact that I'll always be courteous and polite towards anyone, and offer to help, I'm also not going to try and patronise by taking a "you're a woman are you sure you can manage" angle - to take your example I might ask if you needed a hand, or if it looked like you were struggling offer to help - but I'm not going to immediately assume you need it and rush over and push you out of the way either. It's about using discretion and common sense nothing more, and that applies regardless of the gender of the person you are helping." | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" My ONE very specific "polite" thing I don't like is when someone tries to step in when they see me changing a water cooler, especially if it's a man for some reason. Only because I don't like feeling like someone is underestimating my physical strength, but that's a personal hang up that probably comes from being a bigger girl. I do remain polite but also I'm like "thanks but I've got this". Also it always makes me feel good when I manage to do it by myself And this is where common sense and a little respect comes in to it - despite the fact that I'll always be courteous and polite towards anyone, and offer to help, I'm also not going to try and patronise by taking a "you're a woman are you sure you can manage" angle - to take your example I might ask if you needed a hand, or if it looked like you were struggling offer to help - but I'm not going to immediately assume you need it and rush over and push you out of the way either. It's about using discretion and common sense nothing more, and that applies regardless of the gender of the person you are helping. Yes it's the latter that annoys me. I have no problem with someone asking if I need a hand as a water cooler is generally a pretty heavy object but 9 times out of 10 (yes I have changed a lot of water coolers) it will be someone physically trying to take it off me because they assume I can't handle it, whether that be because of my sex or physique. When in actual fact I am the Chief Bottle/Jar Opener among most of my social circles " Yep can totally see why that would be annoying - much the same as I would be faced with a similar situation and anyone tried to do the same and had made assumptions I wasn't capable. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " I think you're absolutely right and I'll fight anyone who says you're not. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Some men are really genuine and actually state their opinions without having hidden agenda. You can spot genuine men when they reply to your thread or stand up for what they believe it is right without texting you after " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Surely, projecting is where it all goes wrong. Some people care, those projecting obviously don’t." Brilliant | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Personally I see more women sticking up for other women. I doubt there's a term for that though x Women supporting women I love seeing this because you know the intention is pure and less likely to have a hidden agenda other than just making someone feel good about themselves " I disagree | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I haven't read the entire thread, but what some see has negative traits others see has positive. I was brought up to be polite and courteous towards others and I love to compliment the ladies. It seems you can't win. You try to be kind and get slagged off or you're impolite and get called nasty. . I'll just be me - take it or leave it. " I know what you mean. For example some call flirting lamppost pissing. I'm a heavy flirt, half the time it's not even serious, I'm just having light hearted back and forth with someone. However, even if I do actually fancy someone, my flirting isn't staking a claim. I'm a swinger, I share happily and readily. Others can go right ahead and piss all over that same lamppost too (provided said lamppost enjoys watersports i guess ) | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving. Yes that's why I said "in my opinion". I was agreeing with you Sorry, but saying "you like it, I don't" seems a funny way of agreeing with someone " I think the agreement is on that neither is wrong or "less feminist". | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
" Yep that too - wasn't about to list them all I also always walk on the side nearest the road when I can and anything else that is basic common decency....so shoot me That probably is a thread in itself. A list of gestures going extinct. Where I am from men kiss woman's hand as a sign of respect. Not always but in certain situations. I love that. Within family too. Careful...the feminists will be after you for failing the sisterhood Cant I be a feminist when it comes to important issues and a person who appreciates this kind of traditional behaviour too? I do hold door for the men too I definitely class myself as a feminist and see nothing wrong with these little shows of chivalry. The difference between that and "old fashioned" in my opinion is EXPECTING a man to do it. I have zero expectations but find it nice when it happens basically. And gee, it's just preference. You like it, I don't, we're both polite, the world keeps moving. Yes that's why I said "in my opinion". I was agreeing with you Sorry, but saying "you like it, I don't" seems a funny way of agreeing with someone I think the agreement is on that neither is wrong or "less feminist"." Ah right...didn't read it that way | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"What about knight in white satin? " They never reach the end so I wouldn’t count on them personally | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? " I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Have seen people throwing this term around a lot on the forums lately. Why do people assume that the only reason a man would stand up for a woman would be to increase their chances of sex? If someone said something unkind about me outside of fab I'd like to think that my platonic male friends would stick up for me. And they definitely don't fancy me! Is it not possible that some men simply want to call out injustice and kindness when they see it, without expecting anything to come of it? Or am I simply being naive and in fact there are just plenty of sycophantic men on here that will pander to us for the slightly increased chance of pussy? Thoughts on a postcard. " i agree with you amber what colour are your niks today? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" " You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into " It's more the shit she says *you're* into that surprises me Gladys...I did remember your weekend name right I hope | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into " Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes." And the anal plug tails | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes. And the anal plug tails " Swish, swish! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes." From white knights to their trusty steeds in one thread...boom | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Probably because some of us are old school and taught at a young age manners maketh man , " Manners does not mean agreeing for the sake of agreeing | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes." The Hoofy ones? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes. The Hoofy ones?" Kind of like platform boots but without a heel on them so you have to balance on just your toes. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes. The Hoofy ones? Kind of like platform boots but without a heel on them so you have to balance on just your toes." Yeah that's the ones, stick a status up I'm sure someone will buy you some! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes. And the anal plug tails Swish, swish!" Feed the horse... | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into It's more the shit she says *you're* into that surprises me Gladys...I did remember your weekend name right I hope " Shhh Gladys gets upset if you use it during the week | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time!" This could be used as an example of White Knighting. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into Pony play is thing. I rather like the look of the shoes. The Hoofy ones? Kind of like platform boots but without a heel on them so you have to balance on just your toes. Yeah that's the ones, stick a status up I'm sure someone will buy you some!" No thanks | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"Who wants to come for a ride on my horsey? I know she likes riding and all but not sure Miss Red will appreciate being called "horsey" You would be surprised at the some of the shit she's into " Ahem, no discretion | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |
"I'll stand by and watch 2 women arguing but I cant stand seeing a bloke being nasty to a woman and would always step in. Last time I done that though, I nearly ended up in the jail for a long time! This could be used as an example of White Knighting. " Well the next time you see a woman getting the living hell beat out of her by a bloke, just you stand there in fear of being called a white knight! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) |