FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > You know you’ve been in lockdown too long when ........
You know you’ve been in lockdown too long when ........
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In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!  
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up! "
Tell me a story?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well what did Brett look like
Pre lockdown he would have been a definite no-no! After 6 weeks of lockdown though - not bad at all! "
Hi this is Brett I will be round as soon as lock down is over |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up! "
I started fantasising about my neighbour even though he's a total wanker |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
Tell me a story? "
Once upon a time there was a very horny old fart who used her wand so often that it contacted the sex toys union and organised a strike for all my toys!
The horny old fart was very sad and cried herself to sleep!
The end!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You actually do try that clothes hanger trick. As advised on forum. Not sure which of the two makes me look more insane. "
What's the clothes hanger thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
Tell me a story?
Once upon a time there was a very horny old fart who used her wand so often that it contacted the sex toys union and organised a strike for all my toys!
The horny old fart was very sad and cried herself to sleep!
The end! "
That's never the end, there's a club SX chapter missing... |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
I started fantasising about my neighbour even though he's a total wanker"
Mine are octogenarians. Hope yours is at least younger? |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
I started fantasising about my neighbour even though he's a total wanker
Mine are octogenarians. Hope yours is at least younger? "
Definitely younger, cute too |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
Tell me a story?
Once upon a time there was a very horny old fart who used her wand so often that it contacted the sex toys union and organised a strike for all my toys!
The horny old fart was very sad and cried herself to sleep!
The end!
That's never the end, there's a club SX chapter missing... "
Several chapters - but thinking about past sexploits makes me horny - and my sex toys are on strike - remember?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
I started fantasising about my neighbour even though he's a total wanker
Mine are octogenarians. Hope yours is at least younger?
Definitely younger, cute too "
What is an octogenarian |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
I started fantasising about my neighbour even though he's a total wanker
Mine are octogenarians. Hope yours is at least younger?
Definitely younger, cute too "
Aw - what a shame he’s a wanker then! X |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
I started fantasising about my neighbour even though he's a total wanker
Mine are octogenarians. Hope yours is at least younger?
Definitely younger, cute too
What is an octogenarian "
Someone in their eighties! He may be in his seventies though - I haven’t asked! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Decided to get on the tictok bandwagon and have turned into more of a perv than I was before - oooooooh those gents that do the little dances are nearly making my foofoo flutter away.
Oh my!
Oh my!
I’m way too old for it but it’s lockdown so what else can you do?
Psyche |
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"Decided to get on the tictok bandwagon and have turned into more of a perv than I was before - oooooooh those gents that do the little dances are nearly making my foofoo flutter away.
Oh my!
Oh my!
I’m way too old for it but it’s lockdown so what else can you do?
Psyche "
I’ve heard of tic-tlc as my kids use it but wouldn’t know where to start! Love your latest pic though btw! |
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"This is how I know I've been in lock down too long. I really need to know what an octogenarian is and I don't care at all arghhhhhh"
With you on that one. I keep pausing tv programs to google things! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is how I know I've been in lock down too long. I really need to know what an octogenarian is and I don't care at all arghhhhhh
With you on that one. I keep pausing tv programs to google things! "
Me too but its embarrassing when it's only playschool I'm watching  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
Tell me a story?
Once upon a time there was a very horny old fart who used her wand so often that it contacted the sex toys union and organised a strike for all my toys!
The horny old fart was very sad and cried herself to sleep!
The end!
That's never the end, there's a club SX chapter missing...
Several chapters - but thinking about past sexploits makes me horny - and my sex toys are on strike - remember? "
Improvise my love! What's wrong with a good old fashioned spin cycle and a cactus....? |
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"In my case it was two days ago when I was awaiting a delivery of dog food.
Got a text that morning to tell me Brett the delivery driver would be here around 2pm - and I spent all morning excitedly wondering what Brett would look like!
So - what’s happened to you that made you realise you’ve been in lockdown waaaaay too long?
Ps - Real stories or - if you prefer - make one up!
Tell me a story?
Once upon a time there was a very horny old fart who used her wand so often that it contacted the sex toys union and organised a strike for all my toys!
The horny old fart was very sad and cried herself to sleep!
The end!
That's never the end, there's a club SX chapter missing...
Several chapters - but thinking about past sexploits makes me horny - and my sex toys are on strike - remember?
Improvise my love! What's wrong with a good old fashioned spin cycle and a cactus....? "
When I was little we had a spin dryer that was so old it practically jumped around the room - so my mum used to make me sit on it to keep it still! I don’t recall any cacti being involved though? X |
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"Daily highlight is having a shower at 5pm, getting dressed, doing your hair and going out for a lettuce or a loaf of bread "
Tbh my hair is awful right now. Desperately need cutting and the grey roots are about an inch long. Leaving colouring it until after lockdown though to let the condition improve.
At least you’re buying lettuce though - I’ve turned into a chocoholic! |
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"You actually do try that clothes hanger trick. As advised on forum. Not sure which of the two makes me look more insane. Yep, passed the coat hanger challenge here "
Still don’t know what that is - but I’m intrigued! X |
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"You actually do try that clothes hanger trick. As advised on forum. Not sure which of the two makes me look more insane. Yep, passed the coat hanger challenge here
Still don’t know what that is - but I’m intrigued! X"
Can you hang your coat off your erect nipples? |
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"You actually do try that clothes hanger trick. As advised on forum. Not sure which of the two makes me look more insane. Yep, passed the coat hanger challenge here
Still don’t know what that is - but I’m intrigued! X
Can you hang your coat off your erect nipples?"
Ah - nope! The nipples may be erect but I don’t think the boobies are firm enough to be the support act! |
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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago
Visiting Blackpool |
"You actually do try that clothes hanger trick. As advised on forum. Not sure which of the two makes me look more insane. Yep, passed the coat hanger challenge here
Still don’t know what that is - but I’m intrigued! X
Can you hang your coat off your erect nipples?
Ah - nope! The nipples may be erect but I don’t think the boobies are firm enough to be the support act! "
Cheat and lean back a bit, no cheating here |
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"I had to turn the cushion over on my spot on the sofa cos I’m making an arse groove!"
I know. I have major guilt that I haven’t deep cleaned the house, have an amazing garden and bake every other day! Instead I’ve watched about a million box sets and chased a puppy round the house pretty constantly! |
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"You think you have completed Netflix and start to watch porn and just get jealous because their actually getting some and your not. "
Amen sister! I loathe couples on here now because they’re ‘getting’ it whilst the rest of us aren’t!
Actually I need another thread to tell them just how much I hate them!  |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"You think you have completed Netflix and start to watch porn and just get jealous because their actually getting some and your not.
Amen sister! I loathe couples on here now because they’re ‘getting’ it whilst the rest of us aren’t!
Actually I need another thread to tell them just how much I hate them! "
 |
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"You think you have completed Netflix and start to watch porn and just get jealous because their actually getting some and your not.
Amen sister! I loathe couples on here now because they’re ‘getting’ it whilst the rest of us aren’t!
Actually I need another thread to tell them just how much I hate them!
"
You know me - I never bear grudges! |
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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
"When you do your hair and put lippy on to take the bin out
Definitely not here! The hairs on my legs and bits are so long now I’ll need to borrow a beard trimmer after lockdown!  "
I had to jump out of bed today I nearly missed them
Peachy you crack me up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
When your so bored you actually calculate how much it would cost you to do all the charity adds. Donkeys, tigers, kids walking for water, RSPCA to name just a few.
Another def sign is when you start asking yourself should I get an over 50s funeral plan. Really have to unplug the tv for few days lol. |
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"Well what did Brett look like
Pre lockdown he would have been a definite no-no! After 6 weeks of lockdown though - not bad at all!
Hi this is Brett I will be round as soon as lock down is over "
No I'm Brett!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have started having conversations with my plants. At least they realise how fascinating I am!"
Ha! Don't get me started on the gardening. Not doing it again next year! |
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