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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I am going to have to burn my house down.
Woke up, went downstairs and ouch!! My foot started to feel sore. Had a look and I have a spot on the the sole of my foot, red bump with a black dot in the middle 
I googled it, apparently it is a bite from either a Black Widow spider or a Brown Recluse
So the only sensible thing to do to get rid of the pesky critter is to burn the house down....
I've left instructions with POF about what to do with my dildo collection just in case I die and I will make sure there are Vol Au Vents at the bun fight.
Anyway.... That is worst case scenario, just in case.
Will keep you all updated
If I am still alive tonight we are having a party 'oop Dan Dog's allotment, Jim's marrow needs looking at  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it is a black widow please let me rescue it, do not burn the house down lol
I love all spiders and want to save them all. He will go to a good home lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife 
They're all over the shop boss.
I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls "
That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If it is a black widow please let me rescue it, do not burn the house down lol
I love all spiders and want to save them all. He will go to a good home lol"
Ooh yes you can have him, I will lure him out with flies in a jam jar |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife
They're all over the shop boss.
I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls
That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs "
How do you know I don't do that anyway?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't recommend burning the house.
Just get a bacon sarnie and leave it outside. They will swarm it then you can burn them.
Oh check your sex toys for any in there. You don't want them getting into your Juju. ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife
They're all over the shop boss.
I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls
That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs
How do you know I don't do that anyway? "
Ah so it’s you that fights crime in Wales |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't recommend burning the house.
Just get a bacon sarnie and leave it outside. They will swarm it then you can burn them.
Oh check your sex toys for any in there. You don't want them getting into your Juju. ??"
I can't hurt it Pink Foxy Lady would kill me, I shall put the bacon sardine in a jam jar, that'll stop him getting in my juju. Thanks boss |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife
They're all over the shop boss.
I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls
That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs
How do you know I don't do that anyway?
Ah so it’s you that fights crime in Wales "
Shhhhh, nobody is supposed to know |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.
If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.
I suspect it isn't  "
Oh Granny, thank goodness you're here. I love how you keep me so grounded |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous."
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis? |
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?"
Asleep probably |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can I be in the house while you burn it? I wanna prove to people I’m fireproof"
I'm not burning now, apparently it wasn't a spider. My foot is sore, ypu can come and do something with it if you don't mind |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?
Asleep probably "
Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep |
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?
Asleep probably
Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep "
Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If it’s a Brown Recluse then say goodbye to your foot. Maybe not now but at some random point in the future when it reactivates "
Ooh I'll look for that |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?
Asleep probably
Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep
Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis "
Ok ok, *hides drama llama* |
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?
Asleep probably
Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep
Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis
Ok ok, *hides drama llama* "
Hopefully it wont start munching on your linin  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.
Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?
Asleep probably
Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep
Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis
Ok ok, *hides drama llama*
Hopefully it wont start munching on your linin "
I'll tell you if he does |
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"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.
If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.
I suspect it isn't "
It could have been a Black Widow that had lost a scrap with a rival gang member and only had one fang |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Dreavus are you dead yet ?
Which one of you lot is going to suck her foot ?
I'm not. I'm having a Miso .......  "
Not yet Granny... just about hanging on.... Aw you properly look after me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.
If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.
I suspect it isn't
It could have been a Black Widow that had lost a scrap with a rival gang member and only had one fang "
Yes it could of, we cannot rule out these things. We need to be prepared for all eventualities |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"A spider? Move out immediately, don’t take chances .. yucky, scary devils they are. You need to leave your possessions and run for the hills! Or hop if your foot is sore "
Good plan, can you let me know when it is safe please Babs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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More likely to be a False Widow, as has been said.
If it were a Black Widow, there’s a chance you wouldn’t be typing your post. If it were a Brown Recluse, you’d probably want to be finding your way to a hospital......volcano lesions aren’t pleasant. |
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