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What type of fabber are you
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It doesn't really matter to be honest ...same result either way..I'd always send a message..very few if any reply...and l've never had a message received first...but like my profile says,not every shoe fits and none of us will lose sleep over it..but it's still a nice joint to hang out in ,the forums are a cool place . |
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Used to be quite proactive, but the time spent on chatting that lead nowhere, a string of cancelled/postponed meetings, plus a couple of no shows. All left us a little jaded, now we’re just hoping our mojo returns as it all seems too much effort at the mo. |
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By *h86Man
over a year ago
Glos |
More approached than approaching. Anxiety can be a pain in the ass! Writing a perfectly good coherent message then convincing yourself you sound like a twat and deleting it!
Although in some ways I'd rather do that then hope that 1 out of a thousand spam messages gets a reply |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach. "
Neither at the mo.
Just here for the shots and giggles of the forums.
But when we were meeting? Proactive. You'll rarely get what you're looking for waiting for it to come and find you. That's where many go wrong. That and being 'too'proactive and using a copy and paste, scatter gun approach in the hope that sending as many messages as possible will get a single reply.
It's all about balance. And not sitting around twiddling your thumbs.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I happily send a first message. May be following a fab or a wink.
Will also message on the back of the forums.
I try to respond to most messages sent to me. Even if only a polite no thanks |
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I wink time to time but I do prefer to be approached. Just because I’m looking for couples and there is two people instead of one so it’s better when they show interest, means that I got a green light from both parts   |
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By *avhonaWoman
over a year ago
Away with the faeries |
I'm rarely confident enough to send the first message. I'll send a wink sometimes, but the fear of rejection is usually sitting there in the back of my mind like a stubborn little git. |
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I'm a flirt on the forums but more passive one on one as I never know if the other person is interested or just being friendly.
It's hard to gauge if they might be interested or not if their profile doesn't have tv/ts on it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach. "
I'm somewhere in between. I don't send many messages because I'm selective/picky, probably more so than my boat race allows tbh. It doesn't bother me sending the first message it's the follow up that gets me doubting myself because different people like different types of message, general chat or something a bit fruity. I invariably get that wrong. But I'm not mystic meg so not a lot I can do about it really. |
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"I'm rarely confident enough to send the first message. I'll send a wink sometimes, but the fear of rejection is usually sitting there in the back of my mind like a stubborn little git. "
Please give it a go, it would make some lucky guys day and the chances of rejection is pretty low if you read your victims (sorry I meant the persons) criteria.
Wish more would message first but fully understand why a lot choose not to or don't need to |
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By *osweet69 OP Couple
over a year ago
portsmouth |
It seems single men are more proactive than single ladies (which is not a big surprise).Is it because men are so use to rejection in the non fab world that they can simple shrug it off but with the ladies they can not. But what about couples what are their reasons for been inactive?
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By *stoppMan
over a year ago
Durham |
I think when you first start out your a lot more proactive as a single male ( like a kid in a sweet shop) but the novelty wears off after a few month of going no where messages, currently I let members approach me these days partly because of the age thing being grandad age etc.. but I still get a few couples a year approach me, so not all bad. |
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I set my status and profile to what I am looking for at the time, they will be especially specific when I need certain attributes for a fantasy I want to indulge in, then I wait to see who messages me with the answers I am seeking |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (Mrs) quite shy until i get to know someone..I wish i was more up front as I never send the first message or go up to someone in a club that i fancy... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't message first anymore as we struggle to find a match. Those that message us generally don't read our profile. Slim pickings! "
I did, but your not into single men.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a dip in and out type and see if a conversation starts via forums. Although sometimes I do send the odd random message, if a profile really catches my eye. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach. "
Honestly, think I have only been messaged first once.
Apart from the odd message at 3am asking if I want a blowjob from a random guy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't message first anymore as we struggle to find a match. Those that message us generally don't read our profile. Slim pickings! I did, but your not into single men."
Correct. Believe it or not single men often didn't read our profile either. It's not just couples, but if we stopped them getting through too then being on here would be a bit pointless. Although maybe it already is... Time will tell |
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I've been getting a lot more traffic since I started using the cam chat rooms, clearly the sight of me sitting at my desk is more compelling than my profile lol
When this lockdown is over I need someone to take some more flattering photos, clearly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Inactive.
Because i can’t be arsed with the monumental effort it takes to actually arrange a meet. If it happens it happens, if not then c’est la vie."
I think this sort of sums up my feelings on the issue.
Well done |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"Proactive all the way 
Results are rarely forthcoming with a passive approach here, especially for us men!  "He who dares wins Rodney" kind of approach.  "
Not sure I've heard that one before |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not really that proactive at the moment. Just using fab here and there when I’ve got a bit of time.
One or two do have my fancy but I’m not someone who usually messages first - age restrictions are a bummer.
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I’m fairly new, but I’m finding the proactive approach leads nowhere 99% of the time (single blokes are ten a penny, and women get inundated with messages)
Then again, a lot of the time I read the profiles, and decide to send a message, only to find they’ve banned single men/everyone of your sex/non site supporters.
So I sit and wait for a wink, a message, or a Fab..... and end up on the forums instead. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I stick my ore in ont' forums from time to time that's about it other than the odd people that have messaged me, I might be a little too relaxed about about it all, although I've had some lovely chats with people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m a polite one msg proactive type of fabber not had a lot of success but being single and not being able to go out only to work I find it passes the time and any interaction is good at the moment to keep you mentally stable it frustrates me when you get blocked so can’t even explain yourself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very rare we move first. We tend to have a nosey on the forum, well i do (miss) i like the chit chat to it all. We arent in a major rush for anything but if someone puts effort in with us we give 100% bk |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ooh it's difficult you want to make a good first impression and put a lot of effort into an introduction only for it to be ignored or deleted...so you become lazy and just try a simple.hello and then your are not making an effort..  |
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By *osweet69 OP Couple
over a year ago
portsmouth |
"Ooh it's difficult you want to make a good first impression and put a lot of effort into an introduction only for it to be ignored or deleted...so you become lazy and just try a simple.hello and then your are not making an effort.. "
We understand and feel your pain. |
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I put a lot of effort in at first, but I’m mostly just trawling for the forums now.
I find it’s much, much easier to meet people via dating apps, and being open and honest about intentions and kinks has yielded great results for me. So I’m just sticking with that.
Occasionally sending a message. Mostly just fab people’s pics and add them to my hot list if I want to check them out again. |
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"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach. "
We are a bit of both- I’m quite shy initially, it’s the Mr that tends to be more proactive in making the first move. Although, it’s me that then does most of the chit chat |
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By *kiolo1Couple
over a year ago
Whitland |
"I set my status and profile to what I am looking for at the time, they will be especially specific when I need certain attributes for a fantasy I want to indulge in, then I wait to see who messages me with the answers I am seeking"
Sounds like a good strategy. I like to use the status to pose questions which brings in messages with people's stories, entertaining and good convo starters. But currently do both, but most people I have continued chats with have approached us first. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ll approach generally as im still a relative newbie i don’t get many approaching me unless! I hope I shouldnt need read more into why I’m not getting many.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mostly just send winks tbh. I do respond to everyone who messages me, which is usually far and inbetween. I guess I could message me, see where it goes. |
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"I don’t need to approach at all, so I don’t...."
Guys to fem ratio is a massive difference, though it's not surprising you don't need to approach anyone!
For a guy with a link for lingerie I do have to be more proactive! |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
Very lazy fabbers here, we don’t browse anymore, haven’t in the last couple of years, so generally just reply to those that message us and take it from there if there’s attraction all round and we click with them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I rarely send a first private message unless something on the forum has triggered it. I tend to interact on the forum and things happen from there.I have quite a few friends but I rarely meet, often because, due to logistics, distance and personal circumstances, it is impractical.
Most see me as a friend or acquaintance rather than as a sexual partner and that’s just fine.
A lot of people have me blocked. |
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I sat back until I was comfy & figured things out. Then I decided nothing would come my way if I wasn't brave enough to talk to some local females & see if any of them fancied something "different". While most were a polite no thanks or ignored me totally, I found a couple of gems who I've met & am still in touch with now away from Fab. I'm never gonna get that lucky being based where I am & chasing the almost impossible dream! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I prefer to wait to be approached. I don’t like rejection
Saying that, if someone makes the effort to message and converse, I will always try to engage, I’m not one to give one word answers and I don’t expect a man to be the only one to put in any effort. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Inactive. I don't need to do anything when I get randoms bombarding me ad nauseum
But I am proactive in making the other party prove their worth and keeping them on their toes. |
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"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach. "
Usually we get on with life and wait to be approach. However, on occasion we will make the first move, though it never seems to work. |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
All men have to think about is does your profile reflect you to the fullest degree? Do you have clear and concise pictures that are not of your cock?
If you can answer no to any of those 2 questions, then you are doomed from the start! |
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"I prefer to wait to be approached. I don’t like rejection
Saying that, if someone makes the effort to message and converse, I will always try to engage, I’m not one to give one word answers and I don’t expect a man to be the only one to put in any effort."
Yeah one word answers and messages with no effort is hard work and only deserves the same kind of response! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach. "
Oh wow this is a great thread. Thanks OP! Changed over the years...
At the beginning very much proactive from updates on my profile, forums to chat rooms and much more. As time went on things just evolved. Learn and adapt. Plus friends distracting and leading astray... ahem!
Became less pro and more inactive in terms of online presence because went more into the social/club scene. It got to the point before lockdown I didn't need to login as much because connected with good friends outside of Fab so always know where to meet and which places to go to etc
Having said that being a Fabber is not just an online presence for me. It's still one of the 1st questions when bump into newbies out and about in the networks... are you on Fab? Yes, great. If not, get on it!
Technically I guess I am still proactive
Being a Fabber will always be special. Even if not logged in for a while. Happy memories 
P.s. XXX Adventures on hold till after lockdown. Stay safe fellow Fabbers x
#Paused |
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By *osweet69 OP Couple
over a year ago
portsmouth |
"Are you proactive on fab or inactive and wait to be approach.
Oh wow this is a great thread. Thanks OP! Changed over the years...
At the beginning very much proactive from updates on my profile, forums to chat rooms and much more. As time went on things just evolved. Learn and adapt. Plus friends distracting and leading astray... ahem!
Became less pro and more inactive in terms of online presence because went more into the social/club scene. It got to the point before lockdown I didn't need to login as much because connected with good friends outside of Fab so always know where to meet and which places to go to etc
Having said that being a Fabber is not just an online presence for me. It's still one of the 1st questions when bump into newbies out and about in the networks... are you on Fab? Yes, great. If not, get on it!
Technically I guess I am still proactive
Being a Fabber will always be special. Even if not logged in for a while. Happy memories
P.s. XXX Adventures on hold till after lockdown. Stay safe fellow Fabbers x
#Paused"
 Sounds like you have found your own little niche. Long may it continue. |
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