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Single parents......
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I’m really finding it all a bit hard today being home alone with a child. No contact with others apart from face time or texts etc. I have a lot of friends that are in the typical “family” situation (mum and dad both at home) that are moaning at me saying how hard it is, I’m wanting to tell the to bugger off and say have a go on your own!! But biting my tongue and being polite, so thought I would rant on here instead!!!
I understand that we are ALL finding it difficult being at home 24/7 and all in different situations but it’s a difficult day for me today. The loneliest I think I’ve felt.
Anyone else struggling?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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*Hugs*
How old is your child?
I am home aline with my 6 y.o. who in all.honesty is living the stay at home rule.
Youtube, roblox and tick tock and Haribo is seeing them through. |
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I struggled yesterday. I felt like I was supposed to be a full time employee working from home, a full time mother, teacher and housekeeper. I don't think I'm actually achieving anything in any of those roles.
I've woken up feeling a bit better about things today. I think everyone is having good and not so good days.
Be kind to yourself, and send me a PM if you want chat or rant to someone in a similar situation.
Sending hugs xx |
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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago
Nottinghamshire |
Think everyone struggling I'm a single parents have been for years mine are older tho only got one at home now hes 23 I'm struggling as my youngest is in assisted living due to disability problems and I cant get to see him to make sure is needs are met I'm sure they are but seeing it makes me feel better  |
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I live within walking distance of two of my children and grandchildren.
My youngest had the virus and I couldn't visit. She has a husband, but she's still my baby. My other daughter separated from her husband prior to this so stuck at home with two children, one special needs no support.
Not seeing my kids for mother's day or my grandsons birthday was hard. Just heard this morning I'm being furloughed so no working from home from today.
It was hard going...it's going to be a nightmare so I understand your pain...hugs to you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm home alone with my 3 aged 14 12 and 9
My boyfriend doesn't live with me so he has gone home last week so I can't see him either, just text and chat on the phone.
Going back to work Sunday though after 3 weeks off with a back injury and will be glad of the adult company. The days are long at the monent   |
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I hit the boredom/fustration wall yesterday, being just two of us is hard for me because I like being able to choose my sociable time and now I'm a permanent entertainer, skype with school friends is helping lots and a half hour break is better than nothing,
Here is a huge form of escapism that suits me right now so that's how I'm coping today, I'll deal with tomorrow, tomorrow.
If you want a chat pop me a message x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I’m ok, just a bit emotional today and feeling it. I think as some have said we all have low days at the moment. It’s strangely comforting to know people are in similar situations so thank you xx |
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Another single parent here - at home with a 16 year old boy and a 14 year old girl.
My 16 year old is recovering from a hand operation (stitches out next week) and can do little for himself. Daughter has mental health issues and is extremely difficult to reason with - self harms when upset/agitated so is now slobbing round the house doing as she pleases and crashing around the house at 2am - knowing there’s little I can do about it. She obviously can’t see her usual support workers and telephone appointments didn’t work for her.
My mum’s one of the 1.3 million so I’m there almost daily taking care of her needs too.
As I’m a horny fecker I had to set the alarm for 6am yesterday for a porn and wank session as I knew the kids would be asleep then!
Fortunately my job can’t be done from home though so I’ve been furloughed. I understand it must be difficult to work from home in those conditions op!
If I feel sorry for myself at all, though, I imagine being stuck in the house 24/7 with either of my exes - and I suddenly feel a whole lot better about being a single parent! 
At least we single parents won’t be joining the rush for the divorce courts at the end of lockdown! |
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Big love to you all. It can be so tough.
I’ve been widowed seven years and have two children, 9 and 12. It’s hard going at the best of times but all this happening around us now, it’s certainly changed things and there’s lots of arguing! X |
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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago
A box at end of your bed |
Single father here with a 12 year old who refuses to do any school work at all. I am not cut out to be a teacher and have tried so hard to help him with school work but he just will not sit at the table and do school work. I am at my whits end with the school stuff and worried about what affect it will have when they all return to school again.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m really finding it all a bit hard today being home alone with a child. No contact with others apart from face time or texts etc. I have a lot of friends that are in the typical “family” situation (mum and dad both at home) that are moaning at me saying how hard it is, I’m wanting to tell the to bugger off and say have a go on your own!! But biting my tongue and being polite, so thought I would rant on here instead!!!
I understand that we are ALL finding it difficult being at home 24/7 and all in different situations but it’s a difficult day for me today. The loneliest I think I’ve felt.
Anyone else struggling?
"
hi hun ,if you ever need to shout out just message .It can be very hard trying to cope with everyone’s feelings and anxieties ,good listener here x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m struggling with cabin fever and the lack of adult conversation. My oldest hasn’t had any care bar one nights respite a week since January, and even that was a lifeline, and now that’s stopped because of the lockdown.
I can’t take her for a walk as she’s too aggressive and unpredictable, so my youngest is stuck in as well. Her dad isn’t working this weekend but has decided he won’t have her so she can have a break.
All I get is “put her in a home” when all I need is adequate support, and with nothing at all at the mo her behaviour has deteriorated- she’s a toddler locked in a very big body. Don’t go on faceb**k as it’s all about the lockdown so here is an escape.
Being a parent is hard, my attached friends are struggling as well, I’m just glad that through it all, even if it’s on here, there are support networks amongst family and friends for us all x
Viv x |
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"I’m struggling with cabin fever and the lack of adult conversation. My oldest hasn’t had any care bar one nights respite a week since January, and even that was a lifeline, and now that’s stopped because of the lockdown.
I can’t take her for a walk as she’s too aggressive and unpredictable, so my youngest is stuck in as well. Her dad isn’t working this weekend but has decided he won’t have her so she can have a break.
All I get is “put her in a home” when all I need is adequate support, and with nothing at all at the mo her behaviour has deteriorated- she’s a toddler locked in a very big body. Don’t go on faceb**k as it’s all about the lockdown so here is an escape.
Being a parent is hard, my attached friends are struggling as well, I’m just glad that through it all, even if it’s on here, there are support networks amongst family and friends for us all x
Viv x"
Sending massive hugs Viv. Sounds like our daughter’s conditions are different but I can definitely relate and feel your pain. Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP
AS you know I'm a single dad with 5 children and I'm still trying to work as well so I feel your pain it's very hard. Keep your chin up babe things will get better xxx  |
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"Single father here with a 12 year old who refuses to do any school work at all. I am not cut out to be a teacher and have tried so hard to help him with school work but he just will not sit at the table and do school work. I am at my whits end with the school stuff and worried about what affect it will have when they all return to school again.
"
Reassure yourself that he won't be the only. Has the school offered any online support? Would he work with a friend on video link or something? Try and make educational opportunities out of things like cooking eg get a recipe for 4 and get him to work out how much for the 2 of you. Etc. I'm a teacher if you want any ideas. |
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"Single father here with a 12 year old who refuses to do any school work at all. I am not cut out to be a teacher and have tried so hard to help him with school work but he just will not sit at the table and do school work. I am at my whits end with the school stuff and worried about what affect it will have when they all return to school again.
Reassure yourself that he won't be the only. Has the school offered any online support? Would he work with a friend on video link or something? Try and make educational opportunities out of things like cooking eg get a recipe for 4 and get him to work out how much for the 2 of you. Etc. I'm a teacher if you want any ideas. "
Absolutely. It’s fortunate in a way that my daughter’s condition means that, if anything, she’s taking school work TOO seriously and working until late at night.
My son was in his GCSE year so is floundering - just hoping he gets the grades for college/an apprenticeship.!
We’re all in the same boat here - just paddling with a different oar! |
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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago
A box at end of your bed |
"Single father here with a 12 year old who refuses to do any school work at all. I am not cut out to be a teacher and have tried so hard to help him with school work but he just will not sit at the table and do school work. I am at my whits end with the school stuff and worried about what affect it will have when they all return to school again.
Reassure yourself that he won't be the only. Has the school offered any online support? Would he work with a friend on video link or something? Try and make educational opportunities out of things like cooking eg get a recipe for 4 and get him to work out how much for the 2 of you. Etc. I'm a teacher if you want any ideas. "
Thanks for your great advice. I will give something like that a try. I know that his friends are saying they are not doing school work too but my worry is that they are just not admitting it. Getting him off the damn xbox is like getting blood from a stone.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
AS you know I'm a single dad with 5 children and I'm still trying to work as well
How are you sorting out childcare while you work ?"
Just b4 lockdown my mother and father in law moved in to mine as a temporary measure to help out so I could still work it's been a help but now I'm stuck with them when I get home from work |
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"Single father here with a 12 year old who refuses to do any school work at all. I am not cut out to be a teacher and have tried so hard to help him with school work but he just will not sit at the table and do school work. I am at my whits end with the school stuff and worried about what affect it will have when they all return to school again.
Reassure yourself that he won't be the only. Has the school offered any online support? Would he work with a friend on video link or something? Try and make educational opportunities out of things like cooking eg get a recipe for 4 and get him to work out how much for the 2 of you. Etc. I'm a teacher if you want any ideas.
Thanks for your great advice. I will give something like that a try. I know that his friends are saying they are not doing school work too but my worry is that they are just not admitting it. Getting him off the damn xbox is like getting blood from a stone. "
See if the Xbox can be repurposed for educational communication
Would he learn coding or something? There are easy 2wk self guided courses online. Also look on Futurelearn (free online courses) - he might find something he's genuinely interested in, and any education is better than none. |
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"I’m really finding it all a bit hard today being home alone with a child. No contact with others apart from face time or texts etc. I have a lot of friends that are in the typical “family” situation (mum and dad both at home) that are moaning at me saying how hard it is, I’m wanting to tell the to bugger off and say have a go on your own!! But biting my tongue and being polite, so thought I would rant on here instead!!!
I understand that we are ALL finding it difficult being at home 24/7 and all in different situations but it’s a difficult day for me today. The loneliest I think I’ve felt.
Anyone else struggling?
"
throws a cuddle at you. This is difficult for many in so many different ways |
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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago
Nottinghamshire |
"I’m struggling with cabin fever and the lack of adult conversation. My oldest hasn’t had any care bar one nights respite a week since January, and even that was a lifeline, and now that’s stopped because of the lockdown.
I can’t take her for a walk as she’s too aggressive and unpredictable, so my youngest is stuck in as well. Her dad isn’t working this weekend but has decided he won’t have her so she can have a break.
All I get is “put her in a home” when all I need is adequate support, and with nothing at all at the mo her behaviour has deteriorated- she’s a toddler locked in a very big body. Don’t go on faceb**k as it’s all about the lockdown so here is an escape.
Being a parent is hard, my attached friends are struggling as well, I’m just glad that through it all, even if it’s on here, there are support networks amongst family and friends for us all x
Viv x"
See I can relate to this for different reasons mine did end up in assisted living it was a hard decision to make not gonna lie n say it's easy it's not but it opened doors up that I spend years n years trying to get the help I needed just amazed me as he got it just like that but hes happy n that's all that matters xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My kids have grown and left now but I was in my own with them a lot when they were very young.
Sympathies if they’re making it hard work.
I made a point of sitting down with them to give completely focussed attention for a set amount of time every day.
It was quite hard to do at first but we soon got into it and it was great fun. |
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I’ve just had a cry with youngest over the amount of schoolwork they’ve got & a lovely email back from the headteacher after I had a really good moan.
I am married to T but he’s not to the father of my children & he’s at work all day.
The children’s father is also at work in an unsafe environment so contact for last 2 weeks has only been by phone.
So it is down to me. It’s hard. So bloody hard. We can’t do it all. I’ve just nearly told 1 friend to F off who seems to be living a fantastic isolation life with 4 school age kids. She’s a special needs teacher part time so very well equipped to deal with it & hubby is also at home.
Give yourself a huge pat on the back for getting to today xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Just b4 lockdown my mother and father in law moved in to mine as a temporary measure to help out so I could still work
Very kind of them. "
Yes it has been a great help and I'd be in trouble if they didn't |
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You’re not alone OP
Although I share custody with my ex, it’s still tough the lack of adult conversation; the frustration of trying to get him to do school work; calls from the teachers, and add to that teenage hormones raging, I’ve had a cry or two.
Now he’s away a week, I have no purpose and this week has been a very quiet blur, except for still trying to get him to do his school work at the other house.
Make sure you talk to someone, even if it’s via text, a couple of friends have kept me going
Hugs OP xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hats off to you single mums and dads , you have the hardest job in the world ! I was on FaceTime to my step daughter yesterday who is on her own with 3 boys under 9 , the baby was trying to escape the middle one is constantly in the fridge and the oldest is stuck in his PlayStation I really felt for her. Sending love to whoever needs it x |
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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
I’m a single mam, my two oldest don’t live at home so my only contact with them and my little grandson has been through FaceTime. My two youngest who are usually at home with me have been with their dad for a week as I’m currently self isolating because of symptoms. I’m missing them like crazy and all the hugs and kisses I get off them but we FaceTime a lot. Saturday I cried for hours but my friends and bf have been a great support and kept me sane.
Big hugs to you  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you all for lovely words and messages. We are all going through this together, just alone. It’s nice to hear from others in the same boat as being parents is hard work but being a parent in isolation is definitely even harder. Although I spoke to my mum today and with her lovely (evil!) tone she did remind me at least we are not being bombed or having to protect our children from a war. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes. I hear you. It's me and two kids, and it's tough.
I had an outside social distanced cuppa with a friend yesterday which was lovely. Have you thought of that? |
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I effectively am a single parent..at the moment. My kids are 10 & 11. I didnt let them go tk their dad for his access this week as I had breaat cancer in late 2017 and therefore am classed as in the vulnerable group. The kida have been mostly with me since this lockdown started so I need to limit households.
My ex isnt happy with me at all. He fails to see the bigger picture...the health of everyone. I told him its not ideal but we have to follow HSE guidelines.
Kids have online classroom work to do. Have devices too. I can get out with a run etc with them except my 11yr old broke a few bones in his wrist last week and is in a cast!! I also ordered tennis rackets, badminton rackets and some other sports stuff today.
MrD is still working and has been staying in his place to keep everyone safe. |
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"I effectively am a single parent..at the moment. My kids are 10 & 11. I didnt let them go tk their dad for his access this week as I had breaat cancer in late 2017 and therefore am classed as in the vulnerable group. The kida have been mostly with me since this lockdown started so I need to limit households.
My ex isnt happy with me at all. He fails to see the bigger picture...the health of everyone. I told him its not ideal but we have to follow HSE guidelines.
Kids have online classroom work to do. Have devices too. I can get out with a run etc with them except my 11yr old broke a few bones in his wrist last week and is in a cast!! I also ordered tennis rackets, badminton rackets and some other sports stuff today.
MrD is still working and has been staying in his place to keep everyone safe. "
We’re in a similar situation as T had - stem cell transplant for blood cancer in 2017 but their dad has been very understanding & it was his idea for me to keep the kids. T is working but self employed & isolates when there.
Look after yourself xx |
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"I effectively am a single parent..at the moment. My kids are 10 & 11. I didnt let them go tk their dad for his access this week as I had breaat cancer in late 2017 and therefore am classed as in the vulnerable group. The kida have been mostly with me since this lockdown started so I need to limit households.
My ex isnt happy with me at all. He fails to see the bigger picture...the health of everyone. I told him its not ideal but we have to follow HSE guidelines.
Kids have online classroom work to do. Have devices too. I can get out with a run etc with them except my 11yr old broke a few bones in his wrist last week and is in a cast!! I also ordered tennis rackets, badminton rackets and some other sports stuff today.
MrD is still working and has been staying in his place to keep everyone safe.
We’re in a similar situation as T had - stem cell transplant for blood cancer in 2017 but their dad has been very understanding & it was his idea for me to keep the kids. T is working but self employed & isolates when there.
Look after yourself xx"
Thanks... same to you. My ex doesnt have 1 reasonable bone in his body. Ranting and raving at me he was. |
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"These are hard times.
Reach out if you're struggling even if it's just virtually x "
Agree. Even if its for a whinge. There are loads of people in the same boat. Look after your own mental health right now xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Single parent to a 10 year old daughter. I’m still doing two shifts a week but they’re night shifts and I have to let my mum stay here the two nights I work (she’s 55) to watch my daughter.
I’ve given up trying to keep the house tidy and I kind of relaxed a bit after that. I’m doing washing and general tidying but not the usual standard.
She’s in the kitchen now creating fuck knows what, she’s making shortbread out of her recipe book, refuses to let me help!
I’m kind of loving not having to do the school run if I’m honest. We’re not in a routine cos if my kid is left to sleep she’ll sleep till gone 11 in the morning, in still up at 7 so I do my cleaning then and washing, weathers nice so I can peg it out by half 8. Not using so many clothes either so I’m kind of enjoying things. |
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It’s so hard, I have a 2 and 6 year old. Last week I was trying and failing to juggle them and working from home while trying not to loose my mind. Felt like all I did was shout constantly and was stressed beyond belief. Then their dad for furloughed so they went to him more and now I’m not well so they’re there indefinitely for now and now I’ve been alone all week I’d kill to hear them fighting with each other, making a mess and climbing all over me |
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"Single parent to a 10 year old daughter. I’m still doing two shifts a week but they’re night shifts and I have to let my mum stay here the two nights I work (she’s 55) to watch my daughter.
I’ve given up trying to keep the house tidy and I kind of relaxed a bit after that. I’m doing washing and general tidying but not the usual standard.
She’s in the kitchen now creating fuck knows what, she’s making shortbread out of her recipe book, refuses to let me help!
I’m kind of loving not having to do the school run if I’m honest. We’re not in a routine cos if my kid is left to sleep she’ll sleep till gone 11 in the morning, in still up at 7 so I do my cleaning then and washing, weathers nice so I can peg it out by half 8. Not using so many clothes either so I’m kind of enjoying things. "
We've delegated cooking to our 17yo son, because we're both ill. It's brilliant that she wants to cook at her age and it'll be bloody useful in future when you can come home to dinner on the table already |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I had to get into a routine because my youngest has ASD and will just do his own sweet thing if he’s not reigned in a bit.
School work takes us from 11 until 2 (that’s for both of them) then we have lunch then go out the back for a kick about or they help me with ing etc in the garden.
Back in for a hot chocolate and then they are allowed free time to play or we watch a film.
That is our Mon to Fri routine.
They are terrible with face timing family so have only done it twice and it makes me cringe because they come across so disinterested.
By late afternoon they are ready to kill each other so I allow them Xbox time and then we go back in the garden for more football or a game of catch.
By the time this virus does one I’ll be ready to sign up to play for Man United.
I’m not a crafter nor a cook type mum, so if they want to draw, crack on. Want to help with getting dinner ready then fair enough but I’m not “baking” with them. We have made stuff together for maths related school work but that’s my limit.
I chat to my mum but she’s up to her eyes with work so is focused on that, my ex messages / video chats about the boys, their other Nan and gramp message and video chat but that’s it for our social interaction. Oh and my course tutor occassionally Zooms me.
I did go to Home Bargains last Friday and I tell you, I’ve never been so excited to get in my car and go off on my own to the shops!!
I’m fairly anti social and a loner though so I’m just enjoying being with the kids, not doing the School run and just being free to potter about without feeling like we must go out and do XYZ.
I’m on parents School Facebook thing and a fair few are struggling with it all OP, I know it doesn’t help practically, but others are going through the same thing and are with you in spirit x
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I’m really finding it all a bit hard today being home alone with a child. No contact with others apart from face time or texts etc. I have a lot of friends that are in the typical “family” situation (mum and dad both at home) that are moaning at me saying how hard it is, I’m wanting to tell the to bugger off and say have a go on your own!! But biting my tongue and being polite, so thought I would rant on here instead!!!
I understand that we are ALL finding it difficult being at home 24/7 and all in different situations but it’s a difficult day for me today. The loneliest I think I’ve felt.
Anyone else struggling?
"
I've got my daughter and my mentally/physically ill mum with me, it's like having 2 kids at times, it's frustrating. I'm trying to stay positive to keep their spirits up as much as mine. I'm not a very touchy feely person with family and friends so I'm missing the physical contact I get from going to the club. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well quick update. She forgot to put the sugar in so was shortbread with just flour egg and butter. Tasted like shit. I didn’t know they didn’t have sugar in till I was chewing one!! |
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"Well quick update. She forgot to put the sugar in so was shortbread with just flour egg and butter. Tasted like shit. I didn’t know they didn’t have sugar in till I was chewing one!!"
Lol. Im baking alot with my 2 to keep them amused and to kill time. Gonna be a fat fool!!! I do exercise but maybe need to step it up a bit with the baking! |
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"I’m really finding it all a bit hard today being home alone with a child. No contact with others apart from face time or texts etc. I have a lot of friends that are in the typical “family” situation (mum and dad both at home) that are moaning at me saying how hard it is, I’m wanting to tell the to bugger off and say have a go on your own!! But biting my tongue and being polite, so thought I would rant on here instead!!!
I understand that we are ALL finding it difficult being at home 24/7 and all in different situations but it’s a difficult day for me today. The loneliest I think I’ve felt.
Anyone else struggling?
"
I'm a single dad although he's 17 it's still hard motivating him and doing pretty much everything else!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I feel for you. I have two teenage daughters who are missing their friends.
It's hard to get interaction with them at times but so far it's not been too bad. Had a tough day on Wednesday as I was struggling with them & their lack of enthusiasm for anything.
But they're coming through the other side now, starting to help out more & keep the place tidy along with sorting through their wardrobes etc to get them in order.
But the lack of grown up contact, shall we say, is hard. I have to be Dad, cook, cleaner, chef & entertainer all in one as I worry about food & bills.
But, we as parents dig deep & carry on. Nothing wrong with feeling like you're struggling though. Chin up everyone.
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"Well quick update. She forgot to put the sugar in so was shortbread with just flour egg and butter. Tasted like shit. I didn’t know they didn’t have sugar in till I was chewing one!!"
Send 'em here. I currently can't taste a damn thing due to Covid-19 |
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I have a friend that’s a single mum with no assistance from her ex and that’s difficult enough so chucking in CV-19 make it epic.
Missy is on the at risk register so house bound, not being allowed out of the house for months has really depressed her. I really worry about bringing cv19 back with me when I have ventured out for shopping .
We are both wfh and trying to get our teenage son to do his homework. Fortunately he has his PlayStation to keep in touch with his friends.
I feel bad when I see al the ‘super parents’ on FB with their bloody schedules and effing rainbows lol. |
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