FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Why is it so hard
Why is it so hard
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm finding its patience but watch you don't fall at the final hurdles..I had just got to organising a coffee meet with a girl I found really attractive and chanced a comment suggesting a coffee at hers instead..long story short it ain't happening now..could've kicked myself |
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Ah young padawan, you have taken the first step along the path to greatness, accepting your limits and asking for guidance.
When I was a young padawan myself, my master told me "Tree does not swing from human, human swings from tree. Look for single branch overhanging river".
It's advice I took to heart, my master was a great teacher. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I joined up here years ago under a different name. Took ages, months, (years even) just to get a reply. But eventually I did, and started chatting to a few and finally a bit of success.
I left, and came back under a different username, and guess what... IT WAS JUST AS DIFFICULT.
Some of the people I knew had either left or changed names, but eventually over time it got rolling again.
a HUGE ratio of men to women, plus you need to out the fakes and whatnot.
Like everything, it just takes time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again. Then I, and near enough every other guy on this website must be crazy.
Because a woman could join and meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. A guy could join and not get a meet for 3 years. Even more. 30 years.
I get annoyed with the website. I get annoyed lowering my standards just in hopes of a reply that never happens. Then I go off the website for a while. But of course, I start thinking to myself maybe today will be different if I login... That is the definition of madness.
I don't mail women anymore on here.
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"They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again. Then I, and near enough every other guy on this website must be crazy.
Because a woman could join and meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. A guy could join and not get a meet for 3 years. Even more. 30 years.
I get annoyed with the website. I get annoyed lowering my standards just in hopes of a reply that never happens. Then I go off the website for a while. But of course, I start thinking to myself maybe today will be different if I login... That is the definition of madness.
I don't mail women anymore on here.
"
I mean if you don’t mail women anymore you’ve probably no chance of a meet . Women do occasionally mail me and say they really really really want to meet me but they never follow through . All talk. Only way I found to get meets was to make the first move |
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"They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again. Then I, and near enough every other guy on this website must be crazy.
Because a woman could join and meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. A guy could join and not get a meet for 3 years. Even more. 30 years.
I get annoyed with the website. I get annoyed lowering my standards just in hopes of a reply that never happens. Then I go off the website for a while. But of course, I start thinking to myself maybe today will be different if I login... That is the definition of madness.
I don't mail women anymore on here.
"
"A woman could join and meet 30 men in 30 days"
Bitch please.
I've been here two years and without lowering my standards I most definitely haven't reached your magic number 30.
Yes, I've met way more than 30 people, but vast majority of them we're people I got to know through organized meet and greets.
Example: over 30 days there's been over 100000 verified men online. 2000 out of them are within 40 miles. 1000 fits your age preference. 400 notice you and message you. 100 of them messages are actually decent. 30 of the senders you may find attractive. With only 10 of them the conversation will go beyond polite "how are you exchanges.
Now we're talking 40 mile radius... reduce it to 10 mile. Boom - you're left with 2 potential meets. 1 of them is married. Shame.
Last man standing.... wait. He's got a full time job and his schedule doesn't align with yours. Plan a meet for weeks and weeks... finally everything is in place. We'll see each other tomorrow... oh No, would you look at that - a no show! |
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"They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again. Then I, and near enough every other guy on this website must be crazy.
Because a woman could join and meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. A guy could join and not get a meet for 3 years. Even more. 30 years.
I get annoyed with the website. I get annoyed lowering my standards just in hopes of a reply that never happens. Then I go off the website for a while. But of course, I start thinking to myself maybe today will be different if I login... That is the definition of madness.
I don't mail women anymore on here.
I mean if you don’t mail women anymore you’ve probably no chance of a meet . Women do occasionally mail me and say they really really really want to meet me but they never follow through . All talk. Only way I found to get meets was to make the first move "
I don't mail first. But I agree most (in my experience) that mail don't follow through. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm finding its patience but watch you don't fall at the final hurdles..I had just got to organising a coffee meet with a girl I found really attractive and chanced a comment suggesting a coffee at hers instead..long story short it ain't happening now..could've kicked myself"
Now that's an " ouch "..you still chatting in anyway with her ?... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find if you're looking at a ladys profile and if she has a specific thing written on her profile or status ,a message to her asking or commenting about that catches their attention rather than a " hi " or " how's things " cause they get 100's of them a day ...the heading in your message has to grab their attention, they have a yellow wall of Messages every day ,just try to be the brick in that wall that stands out as they scroll through it..not easy at all l admit . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Bitch please.
I've been here two years and without lowering my standards I most definitely haven't reached your magic number 30.
Yes, I've met way more than 30 people, but vast majority of them we're people I got to know through organized meet and greets.
"
Are you mental or high or something?
I said a woman could meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. The big word there is wanted.
But lol. You get back saying how how you haven't reached my "magic number" of 30 then in the next sentence state how you met more than 30 people hahahaha.
That is special. Lol.
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"
Bitch please.
I've been here two years and without lowering my standards I most definitely haven't reached your magic number 30.
Yes, I've met way more than 30 people, but vast majority of them we're people I got to know through organized meet and greets.
Are you mental or high or something?
I said a woman could meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. The big word there is wanted.
But lol. You get back saying how how you haven't reached my "magic number" of 30 then in the next sentence state how you met more than 30 people hahahaha.
That is special. Lol.
"
So you're saying that I didn't meet 30 people because I didn't want to? Why would I join this site if I didn't want to meet people I like and find attractive?
Do women's standards not matter in regards to who we want to meet any more? More the merrier?
Went to one m&g with another 100 fabbers. Woopty do. Going by your logic I've now met 100 people.
By meeting 30 people I meant meet them alone and personal. Find each one attractive, interactive and not a let down enough to meet.
You're clearly the high one brotha. Drink some water. |
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Think my first meet from joining a site like here was well over the year mark and even at that I may only get a couple of meets a year. No point in complaining about it, just be patient and hang on in till your luck changes. Just because you joined a swinger site, doesn't mean you going to be getting sex all the time. It takes just as much effort and time, for people to trust you as it would in normal life. Well worth the wait when you do start to meet others that are that bit more kinkier the vanilla folk.  |
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"They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again. Then I, and near enough every other guy on this website must be crazy.
Because a woman could join and meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. A guy could join and not get a meet for 3 years. Even more. 30 years.
I get annoyed with the website. I get annoyed lowering my standards just in hopes of a reply that never happens. Then I go off the website for a while. But of course, I start thinking to myself maybe today will be different if I login... That is the definition of madness.
I don't mail women anymore on here.
"A woman could join and meet 30 men in 30 days"
Bitch please.
I've been here two years and without lowering my standards I most definitely haven't reached your magic number 30.
Yes, I've met way more than 30 people, but vast majority of them we're people I got to know through organized meet and greets.
Example: over 30 days there's been over 100000 verified men online. 2000 out of them are within 40 miles. 1000 fits your age preference. 400 notice you and message you. 100 of them messages are actually decent. 30 of the senders you may find attractive. With only 10 of them the conversation will go beyond polite "how are you exchanges.
Now we're talking 40 mile radius... reduce it to 10 mile. Boom - you're left with 2 potential meets. 1 of them is married. Shame.
Last man standing.... wait. He's got a full time job and his schedule doesn't align with yours. Plan a meet for weeks and weeks... finally everything is in place. We'll see each other tomorrow... oh No, would you look at that - a no show! "
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OP, you’re here 4 months and already have 2 meets under your belt!
I could be wrong but most people would regard that as being pretty successful at this stage.
These threads probably do more harm than good as it can come across as a little whiney, needy or ‘look at me’ and do more to alienate than attract.
(Just our opinion) but hey, whatever happens it’s fab life, so happy fabbing and hope it works out for you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Bitch please.
I've been here two years and without lowering my standards I most definitely haven't reached your magic number 30.
Yes, I've met way more than 30 people, but vast majority of them we're people I got to know through organized meet and greets.
Are you mental or high or something?
I said a woman could meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. The big word there is wanted.
But lol. You get back saying how how you haven't reached my "magic number" of 30 then in the next sentence state how you met more than 30 people hahahaha.
That is special. Lol.
So you're saying that I didn't meet 30 people because I didn't want to? Why would I join this site if I didn't want to meet people I like and find attractive?
Do women's standards not matter in regards to who we want to meet any more? More the merrier?
Went to one m&g with another 100 fabbers. Woopty do. Going by your logic I've now met 100 people.
By meeting 30 people I meant meet them alone and personal. Find each one attractive, interactive and not a let down enough to meet.
You're clearly the high one brotha. Drink some water. "
What utter shite. |
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"They say the definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again. Then I, and near enough every other guy on this website must be crazy.
Because a woman could join and meet 30 men over 30 days if she wanted. A guy could join and not get a meet for 3 years. Even more. 30 years.
I get annoyed with the website. I get annoyed lowering my standards just in hopes of a reply that never happens. Then I go off the website for a while. But of course, I start thinking to myself maybe today will be different if I login... That is the definition of madness.
I don't mail women anymore on here.
"A woman could join and meet 30 men in 30 days"
Bitch please.
I've been here two years and without lowering my standards I most definitely haven't reached your magic number 30.
Yes, I've met way more than 30 people, but vast majority of them we're people I got to know through organized meet and greets.
Example: over 30 days there's been over 100000 verified men online. 2000 out of them are within 40 miles. 1000 fits your age preference. 400 notice you and message you. 100 of them messages are actually decent. 30 of the senders you may find attractive. With only 10 of them the conversation will go beyond polite "how are you exchanges.
Now we're talking 40 mile radius... reduce it to 10 mile. Boom - you're left with 2 potential meets. 1 of them is married. Shame.
Last man standing.... wait. He's got a full time job and his schedule doesn't align with yours. Plan a meet for weeks and weeks... finally everything is in place. We'll see each other tomorrow... oh No, would you look at that - a no show! "
Love this explanation |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hey everyone been here a while now and finding very hard to find any meets or even start a chat any advice?
If it was too easy you probably wouldn't want it. Lol"
that's a great point really  |
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