FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Walking in blind..
Walking in blind..
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets"
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have done it both ways that is pics before hand and just met for coffee after chatting and dont think it makes much of a difference. If however a person has an exact requirement then to confirm by pic is ok but its all about the chemistry?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have not and wpuld not meet without swappibg face pics.
Its a huge part of attraction for me so a face I dont fancy wpuld just be a waste of both our times arranging a meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have not and wpuld not meet without swappibg face pics.
Its a huge part of attraction for me so a face I dont fancy wpuld just be a waste of both our times arranging a meet"
Jasus you should be happy to meet anyone as long as they have a pussy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have not and wpuld not meet without swappibg face pics.
Its a huge part of attraction for me so a face I dont fancy wpuld just be a waste of both our times arranging a meet Jasus you should be happy to meet anyone as long as they have a pussy. "
I know..... I know....
But you know me I have a massively over inflated ego |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have not and wpuld not meet without swappibg face pics.
Its a huge part of attraction for me so a face I dont fancy wpuld just be a waste of both our times arranging a meet Jasus you should be happy to meet anyone as long as they have a pussy.
I know..... I know....
But you know me I have a massively over inflated ego"
Ah it be worse if you had a massively over inflated cock. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have done it both ways that is pics before hand and just met for coffee after chatting and dont think it makes much of a difference. If however a person has an exact requirement then to confirm by pic is ok but its all about the chemistry??"
Intial attraction as well as great conversation leads to chemistry in my opinion.
Chat ended pretty quickly today with a guy because he wasn't willing to share pic pre meet. |
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By *avie tCouple
over a year ago
otherside of nowhere |
Never send face pics but as this is the first thing on our profile we tend not to be asked.....for us the only way of seeing if theres attraction is to meet chat and take it from there.....but people should do whatever is right for them... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope, always prefer an eyes on 1st at the least a face pic. A coffee meet prefered but that can"t always happen. Has to be chemistry and a bit of banter there for me. People have been honest with me when I wasn't for them (including yourself op lol) and I respect that and prefer it that way and I am the same when I don't feel attracted to someone but no matter how polite you are about it some will always take offence.
I got chatting with a girl on Sat, nothing major just a few messages back and forth and to be honest she was bread crumming me with 2/3 word responses and long waits between replies. We started chatting on "the platform that cant be mentioned here", again brief responses from her and she asked for a face pic altough I had already sent 1 here I sent 3 more and then I asked for 1 in return which was reciprocated but unfortunately there was no attraction there for me.
I was straight up and said I hate doing this bit but your not my type, in an instant the tone changed and I was was told I was blocked on fab and she had no interest in guys who are all about looks and think they are better than others.
I tried to be nothing but polite and apologetic through the following exchange but was basically told I'm not all that to look at myself (never said I was) and my texts say it all along my lack of veri's.
I'm not an any hole is a goal type of guy, don't think I am anything spectacular myself but I wont go for someone am not attracted to just to get a leg over....is honesty the best policy or do we lie, play along and just let it fizzle out with no intention of meeting just to avoid confrentation or hurting peoples feelings?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nope, always prefer an eyes on 1st at the least a face pic. A coffee meet prefered but that can"t always happen. Has to be chemistry and a bit of banter there for me. People have been honest with me when I wasn't for them (including yourself op lol) and I respect that and prefer it that way and I am the same when I don't feel attracted to someone but no matter how polite you are about it some will always take offence.
I got chatting with a girl on Sat, nothing major just a few messages back and forth and to be honest she was bread crumming me with 2/3 word responses and long waits between replies. We started chatting on "the platform that cant be mentioned here", again brief responses from her and she asked for a face pic altough I had already sent 1 here I sent 3 more and then I asked for 1 in return which was reciprocated but unfortunately there was no attraction there for me.
I was straight up and said I hate doing this bit but your not my type, in an instant the tone changed and I was was told I was blocked on fab and she had no interest in guys who are all about looks and think they are better than others.
I tried to be nothing but polite and apologetic through the following exchange but was basically told I'm not all that to look at myself (never said I was) and my texts say it all along my lack of veri's.
I'm not an any hole is a goal type of guy, don't think I am anything spectacular myself but I wont go for someone am not attracted to just to get a leg over....is honesty the best policy or do we lie, play along and just let it fizzle out with no intention of meeting just to avoid confrentation or hurting peoples feelings?
"
Definitely honesty.. Like u said yourself, its breadcrumbing otherwise and respect for people as well as their time is more important.
No one should apologise for non attraction. Its there or not. Cannot be forced.
I haven't had any one become aggressive or insulting once I sent a respectful thanks but no thanks message. I thank them for their time, the chats and wish them well. Least anyone deserves. If they do get nasty, more a reflection on them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone really do this on a social and why?
Surely swapping pics before progressing to social meet or otherwise is standard...? "
I think a coffee meet or a drink is a lot better than swapping pictures |
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"I have done it both ways that is pics before hand and just met for coffee after chatting and dont think it makes much of a difference. If however a person has an exact requirement then to confirm by pic is ok but its all about the chemistry??
Intial attraction as well as great conversation leads to chemistry in my opinion.
Chat ended pretty quickly today with a guy because he wasn't willing to share pic pre meet. "
I find it’s mostly women who won’t share face pics. I have no issue sharing mine and do face pic Friday regularly. It’s sending your face to someone won’t send one back or say that they aren’t Thor type and finding themselves blocked so they won’t have to say they aren’t attracted to them.
Not everyone else’s cup of tea and that ok but they block the guys and it appears like they are messers or pick collectors. |
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....? "
Attraction isn't always physical. Stimulate my mind and my body will follow.  |
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"I have done it both ways that is pics before hand and just met for coffee after chatting and dont think it makes much of a difference. If however a person has an exact requirement then to confirm by pic is ok but its all about the chemistry??
Intial attraction as well as great conversation leads to chemistry in my opinion.
Chat ended pretty quickly today with a guy because he wasn't willing to share pic pre meet.
I find it’s mostly women who won’t share face pics. I have no issue sharing mine and do face pic Friday regularly. It’s sending your face to someone won’t send one back or say that they aren’t Thor type and finding themselves blocked so they won’t have to say they aren’t attracted to them.
Not everyone else’s cup of tea and that ok but they block the guys and it appears like they are messers or pick collectors. "
Thor's no one's type |
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By *oseredWoman
over a year ago
Dublin |
I need a face pic for many reasons. 1. so I know who to look for when meeting and 2. to establish if there is even a small physical attraction. 3. if they are not a attracted to me I'd rather find out before a meet in person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, always prefer an eyes on 1st at the least a face pic. A coffee meet prefered but that can"t always happen. Has to be chemistry and a bit of banter there for me. People have been honest with me when I wasn't for them (including yourself op lol) and I respect that and prefer it that way and I am the same when I don't feel attracted to someone but no matter how polite you are about it some will always take offence.
I got chatting with a girl on Sat, nothing major just a few messages back and forth and to be honest she was bread crumming me with 2/3 word responses and long waits between replies. We started chatting on "the platform that cant be mentioned here", again brief responses from her and she asked for a face pic altough I had already sent 1 here I sent 3 more and then I asked for 1 in return which was reciprocated but unfortunately there was no attraction there for me.
I was straight up and said I hate doing this bit but your not my type, in an instant the tone changed and I was was told I was blocked on fab and she had no interest in guys who are all about looks and think they are better than others.
I tried to be nothing but polite and apologetic through the following exchange but was basically told I'm not all that to look at myself (never said I was) and my texts say it all along my lack of veri's.
I'm not an any hole is a goal type of guy, don't think I am anything spectacular myself but I wont go for someone am not attracted to just to get a leg over....is honesty the best policy or do we lie, play along and just let it fizzle out with no intention of meeting just to avoid confrentation or hurting peoples feelings?
Definitely honesty.. Like u said yourself, its breadcrumbing otherwise and respect for people as well as their time is more important.
No one should apologise for non attraction. Its there or not. Cannot be forced.
I haven't had any one become aggressive or insulting once I sent a respectful thanks but no thanks message. I thank them for their time, the chats and wish them well. Least anyone deserves. If they do get nasty, more a reflection on them. "
I wouldnt say she was aggressive or abusive but she did go about a little character assassination by implying I was shallow, looks oriented and thought I was better than others when I wasn't all that myself. We only exchanged a handful of messages nowhere near enough to guage what I am really like but like you I stayed respectful a polite but I guess with some defence mechanisms kick in and the best form of defence is attack....just rise above it |
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By *ommando4Man
over a year ago
South Co. Dublin |
"I need a face pic for many reasons. 1. so I know who to look for when meeting and 2. to establish if there is even a small physical attraction. 3. if they are not a attracted to me I'd rather find out before a meet in person. "
4. To check the Garda photofits for serial rapists ????
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I need a face pic for many reasons. 1. so I know who to look for when meeting and 2. to establish if there is even a small physical attraction. 3. if they are not a attracted to me I'd rather find out before a meet in person. 4. To check the Garda photofits for serial rapists ????"
Passport or driver's license at least, no? |
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done it quite a few times sometimes been a late invite due to someone dropping out or just not had time to engage in kik group first. does mean though you go in with no thoughts on who to talk to and give everyone and equal chance |
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By *1CorkCouple
over a year ago
Cork |
"We don't send face pics. We meet socially first with no expectations. If we click and there is attraction we take it from there. It has worked well for us so far "
Have to agree with this. A 15 min no obligation coffee much better than being caught out by the insincere multiple profile owners. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....?
Attraction isn't all visual  "
Really personally that's bullshit going by the rejections I've received lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....?
Attraction isn't all visual "
Completely agree 
We always meet blind, personality is the key to attraction for us, besides which, some people are simply not very photogenic or conventionally "good-looking" but can be very appealing in the flesh. |
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....?
Attraction isn't all visual
Completely agree
We always meet blind, personality is the key to attraction for us, besides which, some people are simply not very photogenic or conventionally "good-looking" but can be very appealing in the flesh. "
Totally agree and we re happy to do the same . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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All my meets so far have been blind in that they have not seen me. I always get a pic first more to ensure they don't look crazy as sometimes you can tell the loons from a mile away.
I think its hard to gauge attraction from a photo. It's more in the glint of the eye or a cheeky smile.
To the few that I did send one I trusted them but would not do it randomly or very often. I think in the year I am here I sent it 3 times. |
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"Does anyone really do this on a social and why?
Surely swapping pics before progressing to social meet or otherwise is standard...? "
Have gone on social meets in the past without swapping face pics. Some have turned out brilliantly
I think it depends on your own personality and how you find attraction in others. If you're someone who's primary attraction is looks or a particular type of physique, then obviously photos are going to be more important in making the decision to meet someone. |
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"I wonder is it easier for a couple to take that chance "
Couples take a lot for granted (I know, I've done it myself!). When you're meeting or even just chatting as part of a couple, you're very secure in the knowledge that someone always has your back, and that if plans fall through, you can still have fun with each other, and aren't just sighing wearily and reaching for your wand/rabbit/vibe (or kleenex and lube). Rejection or disappointment isn't as hard to take, because you've someone beside you who already thinks you're amazing. Some actually need this. Some would be too fragile to handle meeting as a single, to attend parties and events as a single, to walk into the unknown without having that safety net of a partner either at their side, or at home waiting for them to check in and say everything is going OK. So yeah, meeting blind would be easier for couples in general. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In the past I have met with some great women and couples and I found the best looking woman does not mean the best experience. I met a couple as part of a foursome and this lady was very beautiful as in model material but not great between the sheets and was more interested in what her hubby was doing. So its all about the chemistry and attraction oh and some horny people also goes a long way im in your area but outside your age limit |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I've done a few social meets without swapping face pics.in fact the best meet I've had off here was a blind meet.i think meeting anyone off here is taking a chance anyhow I've met some guys who the pics they swapped were either years out of date or not them at all. |
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By *edro50Man
over a year ago
enniskillen |
I have to say looks don't matter to me I want personality,same likes and loves,wants and desires. I also want a lady who's daring and imaginative!if the lady has all these things and we are looking the same thing then everything else is secondary! |
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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago
Galway |
"I wonder is it easier for a couple to take that chance
Couples take a lot for granted (I know, I've done it myself!). When you're meeting or even just chatting as part of a couple, you're very secure in the knowledge that someone always has your back, and that if plans fall through, you can still have fun with each other, and aren't just sighing wearily and reaching for your wand/rabbit/vibe (or kleenex and lube). Rejection or disappointment isn't as hard to take, because you've someone beside you who already thinks you're amazing. Some actually need this. Some would be too fragile to handle meeting as a single, to attend parties and events as a single, to walk into the unknown without having that safety net of a partner either at their side, or at home waiting for them to check in and say everything is going OK. So yeah, meeting blind would be easier for couples in general. "
That’s pretty much what I was thinking. The majority of people who have said they never send face pics and are happy to meet blind are couples. It’s a lot easier to walk away from a meet when you have someone walking with you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think a face pic is necessary for BOTH parties after initial contact and chatting ..if not it can lead very fast and easily into the " TIMEWASTERS " lane on this Highway...interest has to be both ways in mind and physical.....if not..total waste of time ... |
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....? "
you can't tell much from a pic, the way it's taken can flatter anyone, far from vain I like face to face. you can read more from body language than an pic. but I would share a face pic for id purposes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always like to see a face pic first before a meet. It gives both the opportunity to back out though if there is a connection in the chat, I wouldnt base whether to meet or not on the face pic.
If a coffee meet takes place and we hit it off good....if no chemistry....well I like meeting new possible friends!
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"I always like to see a face pic first before a meet. It gives both the opportunity to back out though if there is a connection in the chat, I wouldnt base whether to meet or not on the face pic.
If a coffee meet takes place and we hit it off good....if no chemistry....well I like meeting new possible friends!
"
Is this dream date .com or swinging, most people only ever meet the once !!!! So why looking at pictures!!!! When it's about getting physical , that's pof mind you most of us can find the face pictures on there lol |
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"Is this dream date .com or swinging, most people only ever meet the once !!!! So why looking at pictures!!!! When it's about getting physical , that's pof mind you most of us can find the face pictures on there lol "
So, to be clear.... are you saying that you don't care what someone looks like physically? You have absolutely no preferences at all? That nothing could possibly put you off shagging someone once they agreed to meet you? |
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"Tryst and isodole its not about looks for me its about personality ,attitude,imagination and adventurous connection for me!"
Good for you... Although I'm not sure why you've singled me out to say it to...  |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....?
Attraction isn't all visual
Completely agree
We always meet blind, personality is the key to attraction for us, besides which, some people are simply not very photogenic or conventionally "good-looking" but can be very appealing in the flesh. "
This sometimes it just there the urge to rip someones clothes off |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always like to see a face pic first before a meet. It gives both the opportunity to back out though if there is a connection in the chat, I wouldnt base whether to meet or not on the face pic.
If a coffee meet takes place and we hit it off good....if no chemistry....well I like meeting new possible friends!
Is this dream date .com or swinging, most people only ever meet the once !!!! So why looking at pictures!!!! When it's about getting physical , that's pof mind you most of us can find the face pictures on there lol "
Unlike you, I just can't shag anything with a pulse! There has to be some sort of attraction and yeah looks do play a part to a small degree.
But each to their own |
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By *edro50Man
over a year ago
enniskillen |
"I always like to see a face pic first before a meet. It gives both the opportunity to back out though if there is a connection in the chat, I wouldnt base whether to meet or not on the face pic.
If a coffee meet takes place and we hit it off good....if no chemistry....well I like meeting new possible friends!
Is this dream date .com or swinging, most people only ever meet the once !!!! So why looking at pictures!!!! When it's about getting physical , that's pof mind you most of us can find the face pictures on there lol
Unlike you, I just can't shag anything with a pulse! There has to be some sort of attraction and yeah looks do play a part to a small degree.
But each to their own "
I agree Phoenix |
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By *inale.xMan
over a year ago
Portadown |
I dont object to sending face pics, attraction is largely visual.
But, it is actually something that you need to have built up a little trust before you send them. Your face is pretty much your identity?
For some, in many professions, there can be serious implications of being 'outed' on a site such as fab due to associated stigma. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep- have done it most times on coffee meets and several times for sex meets
But why? Isn't attraction something you want to establish early on....?
Attraction isn't all visual
Completely agree
We always meet blind, personality is the key to attraction for us, besides which, some people are simply not very photogenic or conventionally "good-looking" but can be very appealing in the flesh.
This sometimes it just there the urge to rip someones clothes off "
Oh yes!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I dont object to sending face pics, attraction is largely visual.
But, it is actually something that you need to have built up a little trust before you send them. Your face is pretty much your identity?
For some, in many professions, there can be serious implications of being 'outed' on a site such as fab due to associated stigma."
Not just that, there are many here who have no regard for privacy or discretion and will just share pics they have been sent with other users.  |
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"OK I see that my apologies I seem to have offended you!I'm just giving my point of view!"
I agree with Pedro and I would have said the same myself it's not all about physical looks people it just go for physical miss everything somebody could be absolutely amazing in bed but not look the best brain is wired differently and as a ugly guy myself I know
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"Does anyone really do this on a social and why?
Surely swapping pics before progressing to social meet or otherwise is standard...? "
I sometimes go with my gut, I purposely dont ask for a face pic and take the risk, its exciting and the last time I did it I struck gold. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Does anyone really do this on a social and why?
Surely swapping pics before progressing to social meet or otherwise is standard...?
I sometimes go with my gut, I purposely dont ask for a face pic and take the risk, its exciting and the last time I did it I struck gold."
Brave move |
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"Does anyone really do this on a social and why?
Surely swapping pics before progressing to social meet or otherwise is standard...?
I sometimes go with my gut, I purposely dont ask for a face pic and take the risk, its exciting and the last time I did it I struck gold.
Brave move "
It is, but I think there was something about her, it just got that feeling it was going to pay off, mind you a few times it didnt  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone really do this on a social and why?
Surely swapping pics before progressing to social meet or otherwise is standard...?
I sometimes go with my gut, I purposely dont ask for a face pic and take the risk, its exciting and the last time I did it I struck gold.
Brave move
It is, but I think there was something about her, it just got that feeling it was going to pay off, mind you a few times it didnt "
Is that not kind of wasting th other persons time? You might have been able to tell them they werent your type before the meet...
Although I guess they did the samething |
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I'd never meet without seeing a face pic and I'd think it was very strange if a guy agreed to meet me without one - an indication of low to no standards, which is a turnoff for me.
I've sent my face pic to probably hundreds of guys at this stage and have never had an issue. It's extremely not a big deal to show someone my face. |
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