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The sins of your friends.
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Someone is a bit of a cunt to you, calls you some names, harasses you. Finds reasons to argue with you. Lets say in work.
Someone else out of the blue is nice to you, you have a few chats, etc in the canteen when no one else is around etc.
Then you find out they are great friends with the person who goes out of their way to annoy you.
What do you do?
a) Judge them harshly for it and no longer be friends with them.
b) Don't judge them, but distance yourself from being friends with them, while staying polite.
c) Continue to be friends with them and don't judge them at all.
d) something else I cant think of.
I am a B, I wont judge them, but the chances of me and them being friends are now zero. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone is a bit of a cunt to you, calls you some names, harasses you. Finds reasons to argue with you. Lets say in work.
Someone else out of the blue is nice to you, you have a few chats, etc in the canteen when no one else is around etc.
Then you find out they are great friends with the person who goes out of their way to annoy you.
What do you do?
a) Judge them harshly for it and no longer be friends with them.
b) Don't judge them, but distance yourself from being friends with them, while staying polite.
c) Continue to be friends with them and don't judge them at all.
d) something else I cant think of.
I am a B, I wont judge them, but the chances of me and them being friends are now zero." I'd be B too just keep them at arm's length but be nice enough can't say anything bad about ya |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would assume they've decided that's the best way to deal with the the other person and continue being civil.
I don't do "friends" or "enemies" at work, I'm there to do a job. |
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C because it would piss the other person off to see it doesn't bother you and it's unfair to judge someone else on another's behavior. Besides they night just be friends with said people due to being friendly to all. |
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"I take people as they come so C.
Also it might soften the forsr persons view to you"
B and C people are both taking them as they come.
B are just taking their wider social interactions into account, and C are taking their personal one on one interactions into account. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I take people as they come so C.
Also it might soften the forsr persons view to you
B and C people are both taking them as they come.
B are just taking their wider social interactions into account, and C are taking their personal one on one interactions into account."
Fair point still C for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"None of the above but I'd sort out the original person first and foremost.
This exactly. If something like this happens in work, then it needs to be sorted first "
What if you can't sort it? Some people are just natural see you next Tuesdays. B |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"None of the above but I'd sort out the original person first and foremost.
This exactly. If something like this happens in work, then it needs to be sorted first
What if you can't sort it? Some people are just natural see you next Tuesdays. B"
Synts? |
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By *aid backMan
over a year ago
by a lake with my rod out |
"None of the above but I'd sort out the original person first and foremost.
This exactly. If something like this happens in work, then it needs to be sorted first
What if you can't sort it? Some people are just natural see you next Tuesdays. B
Synts?"
The robots are taking over? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone is a bit of a cunt to you, calls you some names, harasses you. Finds reasons to argue with you. Lets say in work.
Someone else out of the blue is nice to you, you have a few chats, etc in the canteen when no one else is around etc.
Then you find out they are great friends with the person who goes out of their way to annoy you.
What do you do?
a) Judge them harshly for it and no longer be friends with them.
b) Don't judge them, but distance yourself from being friends with them, while staying polite.
c) Continue to be friends with them and don't judge them at all.
d) something else I cant think of.
I am a B, I wont judge them, but the chances of me and them being friends are now zero."
I would pick C as they may have a completely different experience of the person you do. They are being friendly to you and until they give you reason not to trust them then just live and let live. |
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Imagine this in families . If you had a brother/ sister and you really didn’t like their partner , what would you do. I can think of several people in my immediate family I literally can’t stand but I don’t fall out with their partner/ my relative |
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C... While I get to the bottom of the problem with the first person and sort it out.
I've only ever come across 2 people in my entire working life who were simply cunts for no other reason than that is who they are. Both were female. One later lost her job for physically assaulting an apprentice (she dragged him out of the office by his ear when he brought her the wrong thing to 'show him' which one she actually wanted), and the other was an older woman who refused to up-skill or use new software because she was 'too old for all that' (she was 50) and doubled her own section staff's workload by forcing them to do everything manually for her as well as digitally per the organisation's policy. She too eventually lost her job for bullying. Anyone else who acted the cunt, I was able to resolve issues with, they were usually just stupid misunderstandings or resentments.
If your first colleague however did turn out to be a confirmed cunt, and there was no hope of changing that, I would have reservations about someone who would ignore, tolerate or worse, encourage, that kind of behaviour, so I would probably end up distancing myself from them too over time.
Same with swinging actually... I tend to take folk as I find them, and if there's an issue try to straighten it out.... But if someone is an irredeemable cunt and others tolerate or support it, I'll just distance myself and get on with doing what's right for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is a tricky one but overall I think C. I wouldn’t expect anyone to not speak or be friendly with someone on my account but I guess at a level I’d would be conscious of the relationship they might have and temper what I say around them as a result. |
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"This is a tricky one but overall I think C. I wouldn’t expect anyone to not speak or be friendly with someone on my account but I guess at a level I’d would be conscious of the relationship they might have and temper what I say around them as a result."
This for me too, you never know what they will say back about you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone is a bit of a cunt to you, calls you some names, harasses you. Finds reasons to argue with you. Lets say in work.
Someone else out of the blue is nice to you, you have a few chats, etc in the canteen when no one else is around etc.
Then you find out they are great friends with the person who goes out of their way to annoy you.
What do you do?
a) Judge them harshly for it and no longer be friends with them.
b) Don't judge them, but distance yourself from being friends with them, while staying polite.
c) Continue to be friends with them and don't judge them at all.
d) something else I cant think of.
I am a B, I wont judge them, but the chances of me and them being friends are now zero."
I'm definitely ( B ) I would definitely be polite but keep my distance. I couldn't see myself being friends with them. |
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By *oseredWoman
over a year ago
Dublin |
"Someone is a bit of a cunt to you, calls you some names, harasses you. Finds reasons to argue with you. Lets say in work.
Someone else out of the blue is nice to you, you have a few chats, etc in the canteen when no one else is around etc.
Then you find out they are great friends with the person who goes out of their way to annoy you.
What do you do?
a) Judge them harshly for it and no longer be friends with them.
b) Don't judge them, but distance yourself from being friends with them, while staying polite.
c) Continue to be friends with them and don't judge them at all.
d) something else I cant think of.
I am a B, I wont judge them, but the chances of me and them being friends are now zero.
I'm definitely ( B ) I would definitely be polite but keep my distance. I couldn't see myself being friends with them. "
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