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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? "
what do you mean by unintentional disrespect? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? "
It depends how far that person get with his or her unintentional disrespect.
It happened to me once. That person came back asap to me with apologies. It has been forgiven.
Normally,automatic block  No mercy  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? what do you mean by unintentional disrespect? "
Unintentional disrespect - not reading profiles, ignoring people's preferences, being overly persistent.... one can be all nice and polite and be convinced that they're so much better and more kind and genuine than everyone else and get carried away with the sleazy "nice guy" persona to the point where they hugely overstep the basic respect mark. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? what do you mean by unintentional disrespect?
Unintentional disrespect - not reading profiles, ignoring people's preferences, being overly persistent.... one can be all nice and polite and be convinced that they're so much better and more kind and genuine than everyone else and get carried away with the sleazy "nice guy" persona to the point where they hugely overstep the basic respect mark. "
depends then of the way the do it if its a harmless misundertanding i wouldn't care ... if its constant even after being told no then i would block... cant say that happens to single guys that often |
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"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? what do you mean by unintentional disrespect?
Unintentional disrespect - not reading profiles, ignoring people's preferences, being overly persistent.... one can be all nice and polite and be convinced that they're so much better and more kind and genuine than everyone else and get carried away with the sleazy "nice guy" persona to the point where they hugely overstep the basic respect mark. "
I usually do a 'thanks but no thanks' reply, even when it's obvious they didn't read my profile or aren't respecting my preferences. But only once. If they become persistent I won't reply and might even block. There's even a wee bit on my profile that states this.
I had a polite copy and paste message from a 23 year old guy over the weekend when I briefly had my filters off for a forum discussion. Now... 23 is 12 years outside my lower age preference, so this wasn't someone approaching 35 who thought he would chance his arm... This was someone who clearly hadn't even looked at my profile... I was just another hole online. But I replied and said 'thanks, but as my profile states, I'm not looking for meets, and when I am, my preference is for men over 35... Wish you luck with your search...' etc. Did I get a polite 'thanks for your reply. Happy fabbing'? Nope... Did it bother me? Nope... What did irk me however was getting his original copy and paste message again just 45 minutes later  Straight to block button. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's easy to fake "manners", respect takes into account the other person's wants, needs and boundaries."
Couldn't have put it any better myself. People faking manners then demand respect. Spot on. |
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"It's easy to fake "manners", respect takes into account the other person's wants, needs and boundaries.
Couldn't have put it any better myself. People faking manners then demand respect. Spot on. "
I think it all depends on what the intention was.. To accidently cause offence is acceptable with me. But I'm not easily offended, anyway. But to deliberately overlook your requests, clearly stated, is deliberate. And the intention... Well, at a minimum, its careless,.. And annoying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion? "
I think a lot depends on the circumstances here. If they didn't bother to read a profile and messaged then they don't deserve the respect or time. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Now... I am a passionate believer in respect to be earned and not given.
Does a person who disrespected you from their first message (even if it's unintentional) deserve your respect all the same?
What's your opinion?
I think a lot depends on the circumstances here. If they didn't bother to read a profile and messaged then they don't deserve the respect or time."
Very true... but... exactly same individuals who do that - also end up moaning about how nobody treats them right... catch 22 |
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For me respect is like sand. The moment I meet someone I pour it into their hands, so now they have two handfulls of sand.
If they drop it all on the floor straight away, then its gonna be hard for them to pick it all back up.
Everyone will let grains of sand fall between their fingers, and thats fine. |
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"Oh by the way, I'm not talking about anyone in particular, just some mail I've received lately raised a wonder.. "
Unless stated, I never assume anyone's thread is about someone in particular... My own threads are often inspired by conversations I've had with friends about their experiences and my curiosity about whether their experience was unique or something others had shared. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think a lot depends on the circumstances here. If they didn't bother to read a profile and messaged then they don't deserve the respect or time.
Very true... but... exactly same individuals who do that - also end up moaning about how nobody treats them right... catch 22 "
I get what you mean there but we've all seen plenty of people complaining there are no meets but they only want something very specific. In your case it just some respect, which should be easy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I believe everyone deserves a basic level of respect in evertday life. A stranger hasn't had an opportunity to earn your respect, but I treat them with respect when I meet them...'treat others as you wish to be treated' kind of logic. It's more to do with self respect and not being hypocritical. Normally when I feel disrespect I still show that person basic respect, as the majority of the time their disrespect comes from ignorance / negative personality trait(s) or their own mental turmoil and I won't lower my standards because of their behaviour.
I believe basic respect for others should be a given but I strongly believe admiration mush be earned. Admiration is the non basic form of respect in my book.
On here I don't see ignoring an offensive message or blocking that sender as being disrespectful, as it's a virtual world with virtual people ( some fake and some genuine ) until you actually meet someone or engage through many messages / posts. Like the site rules say 'taje no response to mran a polite no thank you / not my type, and people who are ignorant / send a generic paste and post first message / badger shouldn't be surprised if they get no responce...but that's just how I see it, everyone has their own views formed from their own experience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it depends sometimes. There's a difference between disrespect, and chancing their arm or being persistent I think.
But yeah mutual respect is key to me to meet, I'm not there solely for anyone elses pleasure but mine too. And if we're on the same wavelength all the better.
No respect, then what's the point, can't be lowering or belittling ourselves for fab meets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I believe if people don't respect from the beginning including reading profiles properly then I would doubt their ability to respect during a meet. That being said we are all guilty of missing the nuances in some people's profiles. Respect should of course be mutual and if someone does show interest in messaging its always respectful to reply even by saying 'sorry not my type' rather than just delete unless their profile states otherwise. If they persist then block. We are all human beings after all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it's unintentional then yes, but some people these days are far too offended, sometimes people get offended by a compliment, I once said to a girl i seen in town one day fuckin hell love some titts on ye she thought I was disrespectful  |
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