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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Two couples were playing cards one evening.

John accidentally dropped some

cards on the floor. When he bent down under

the table to pick them up, he

noticed that Bill's wife's legs were wide

apart, and she wasn't wearing

any underwear! Shocked by this, John upon

trying to sit back up again,hit

his head on the table & emerged red-faced.

Later, John went to the kitchen

to get another drink. Bill's wife followed

& asked, "Did you see

anything that you liked under there?"

Surprised by her boldness, John admitted that,

well, indeed he did. She

said, "Well, you can have it but it will cost

you $500."

After taking a minute or two to assess the

financial situation as well as

the moral costs of this offer, John says that

he is indeed interested.

She tells him that since her husband, Bill,

works Friday afternoons & John

doesn't, that John should be at her house

around 2 p.m. Friday afternoon.

When Friday rolled around, John showed up at

Bill's house for the planned

time at 2 pm sharp & after paying her the

agreed upon $500, they went to

the bedroom & completed their sexual

transaction as Sue had promised.

Afterwards, John quickly dressed & left. As

usual, Bill came home from

work at 6pm & upon entering the house, asks

his wife abruptly, "Did John

come by the house this afternoon?" With a lump

in her throat, Bill's wife

answered,"Why yes, he did stop by for a few

minutes this afternoon".

Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her

husband curtly asked, "And did he

give you $500?". In terror, she assumed that

somehow he had found out, &

after mustering up her best poker face,

replied, "Well, yes, in fact he

did give me $500".

Bill, with a satisfied look on his face,

surprised his wife by

saying,"Good, I was hoping he did. John came

by the office this morning &

borrowed $500 from me. He promised me he'd

stop by our house this

afternoon on his way home & pay me back."

*NOW THAT'S A PLAYER ! ! ! !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.

"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." She rubbed baby

oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. Don't move until I tell you,"

she said, " pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.

"Oh it's a statue," she replied, "the Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too."

No more was said, not even when they went to bed. Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer.

"Here," he said to the statue, have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing."

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

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