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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Looking to see what peoples opinions are on this
Was talking to a friend over the weekend. He is in a relationship with his girlfriend for the last number of years. They got talking about having a threesome, group plan etc. He said she was fully up for it when it involved another guy/guys joining but told him now way,not ever would she let a girl join. He said he felt upset after it because he was willing to try what she wanted but she wouldn't try what he wanted. I told him that in my opinion they should forget about it so and he told me that, the problem now is she wants to try another guy with them and keeps asking and dropping hints since.
What would you do / have done in this situation? I dont know what advise him now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Looking to see what peoples opinions are on this
Was talking to a friend over the weekend. He is in a relationship with his girlfriend for the last number of years. They got talking about having a threesome, group plan etc. He said she was fully up for it when it involved another guy/guys joining but told him now way,not ever would she let a girl join. He said he felt upset after it because he was willing to try what she wanted but she wouldn't try what he wanted. I told him that in my opinion they should forget about it so and he told me that, the problem now is she wants to try another guy with them and keeps asking and dropping hints since.
What would you do / have done in this situation? I dont know what advise him now "
Well be planted the seed so now he must watch it grow. |
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When he originally brought up the idea he probably envisaged a hot threesome with the single girl down the road, but, like often happens, realised that his partner's idea of a threesome was with the hot single guy down the road.... If he's not comfortable with an MFM, and she's not comfortable with an FMF... They really just have the following options..
1) forget about the whole thing and continue as they are
2) try soft swap with another couple and see how that goes
3) agree to each have their own sexual exploration with others but without each other's involvement
4) completely go their separate ways
We've had a similar conversation before OP, and what I said then still stands... You can't and shouldn't badger someone into something like this... Everyone should come to it willingly or not at all. There's no fair or unfair in forcing this issue... It's either right or wrong, and if someone is being badgered, it's very very wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When he originally brought up the idea he probably envisaged a hot threesome with the single girl down the road, but, like often happens, realised that his partner's idea of a threesome was with the hot single guy down the road.... If he's not comfortable with an MFM, and she's not comfortable with an FMF... They really just have the following options..
1) forget about the whole thing and continue as they are
2) try soft swap with another couple and see how that goes
3) agree to each have their own sexual exploration with others but without each other's involvement
4) completely go their separate ways
We've had a similar conversation before OP, and what I said then still stands... You can't and shouldn't badger someone into something like this... Everyone should come to it willingly or not at all. There's no fair or unfair in forcing this issue... It's either right or wrong, and if someone is being badgered, it's very very wrong. "
Our conversation was ringing in my head when i was talking to him, no more came from my situation as are no longer Fb's. I tried explaining a few things to him without letting him know i was part of a swinging site.
I dont think the problem he has is not wanting a male, he is ok with that. But his problem is that shes not ok with another female joining them. Granted we were both full of drink but in his own words "shes selfish"  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is she available for a mocho latte? 
 believe me, they might struggle to even get others to join. She aint no oil painting
Does she have a pulse?
#highstandardsaregreatlyoverrated  "
Can she even half pretend to laugh at Kaizer's jokes?  |
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"Is she available for a mocho latte?
believe me, they might struggle to even get others to join. She aint no oil painting
Does she have a pulse?
#highstandardsaregreatlyoverrated
Can she even half pretend to laugh at Kaizer's jokes? "
Jesus, you're fussy! The only red line I have is that she must be there.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is she available for a mocho latte?
believe me, they might struggle to even get others to join. She aint no oil painting
Does she have a pulse?
#highstandardsaregreatlyoverrated
Can she even half pretend to laugh at Kaizer's jokes?
Jesus, you're fussy! The only red line I have is that she must be there. "
Do not call the Manbeast that please Micky
Presence isn't all its cracked up to be at times
Apparently she's no oil painting.... Would finger painting do? |
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"Is she available for a mocho latte?
believe me, they might struggle to even get others to join. She aint no oil painting
Does she have a pulse?
#highstandardsaregreatlyoverrated
Can she even half pretend to laugh at Kaizer's jokes?
Jesus, you're fussy! The only red line I have is that she must be there.
Do not call the Manbeast that please Micky
Presence isn't all its cracked up to be at times
Apparently she's no oil painting.... Would finger painting do? "
I do like a bit of fingering, truth be told.
It's an underrated skill. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm sure as with most couples on here, our decision to start swinging was not taken easily and millions of conversations were had. We talked for a long time about our likes and dislikes and then when we decided to give it a go the conversation started about what rules we would have etc and what were our limits. Although we have changed a lot in our rules and what we like since we started the one thing that's never changed is we talk about everything. For your friend his first step was bringing it up... He might not have gotten the answer he wanted but those are the conversations that need to be had. Neither himself or herself can be pushed into doing anything they don't want to do but he should take his time with this and really make sure they are on the same page before they go any further with it.
Mrs  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm sure as with most couples on here, our decision to start swinging was not taken easily and millions of conversations were had. We talked for a long time about our likes and dislikes and then when we decided to give it a go the conversation started about what rules we would have etc and what were our limits. Although we have changed a lot in our rules and what we like since we started the one thing that's never changed is we talk about everything. For your friend his first step was bringing it up... He might not have gotten the answer he wanted but those are the conversations that need to be had. Neither himself or herself can be pushed into doing anything they don't want to do but he should take his time with this and really make sure they are on the same page before they go any further with it.
Mrs "
It would be much easier if he was on here and reading these because i dont fancy telling him some of the info on here and then answering where i pulled it from. Its not an easy situation to be in id imagine. The closest i came to it was with a fb but not someone i was in a relationship with. Hats off to the couples on here that have being through it and are enjoying this type of lifestyle |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Do it then she might give in once she's had her fun. You suggested and it her in the mind of thinking so when she's had her fun either she will want group fun with other cpls or just men or maybe give in to your sexual desires |
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Shes like most women I have ever chatted to.
If youre a man, and you are not comfortable with a mfm only happening and a fmf never happening, then dont bring the topic up at all.
Women are not dumb, they know nearly every guy on the planet dreams of a ffm, they have had guys drop hints before about them.
If what you really want is ffm and you are willing to do a mfm to get it, then just leave her alone too.
Its just some fantasy, leave it to the people who enjoy group sex to do..
Or dump them and try find one of them girls so terrified of being alone they will turn bi for their man. |
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"Shes like most women I have ever chatted to.
If youre a man, and you are not comfortable with a mfm only happening and a fmf never happening, then dont bring the topic up at all.
Women are not dumb, they know nearly every guy on the planet dreams of a ffm, they have had guys drop hints before about them.
If what you really want is ffm and you are willing to do a mfm to get it, then just leave her alone too.
Its just some fantasy, leave it to the people who enjoy group sex to do..
Or dump them and try find one of them girls so terrified of being alone they will turn bi for their man."
Wow ... I only have this to say ...  |
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"Tell him his chances of being able to pull a unicorn for ffm are zilch anyway,he's tying himself in knots over nothing"
Might as well try the mmf. He might like it. Even if she agreed to ffm, would struggle to find the f. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell him his chances of being able to pull a unicorn for ffm are zilch anyway,he's tying himself in knots over nothing
Might as well try the mmf. He might like it. Even if she agreed to ffm, would struggle to find the f."
The old tit-for-tat is a bit childish anyway, does any adult relationship really operate in that way . It's a question of finding things that both can be happy with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its amazing how many men want to go down the ffm option but back away from the mmf option
Why is it amazing surely its just another preference?"
Yes just another preference
I love both options, but in my own personal experience the mmf gets brushed to the side |
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Micky has been obsessed with the Manbeast for years 
