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Wife not interested in sex
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here "
All to familiar |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
Only you can decide if this is too personal.
Anyhow I guess the way to go is to sit down with the wife and have an open conversation about needs, wants and desires on both sides and take it from there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only you can decide if this is too personal.
Anyhow I guess the way to go is to sit down with the wife and have an open conversation about needs, wants and desires on both sides and take it from there. "
I did, it fell on deaf ears |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"I did and she knows how I feel not been meen to her she is cool but well we pass it off at this stage , hence me on here "
Yeah but do you know what her need, wants and desires are?
Anyhow there's plenty of relationships where the sex went stale and if you can't fire it up again, maybe she's open to the idea of getting it somewhere else as long as you're discreet and keep it at an nsa level - given that the relationship is heathy in all other aspects. |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"By the way I have never meet any women on here but I was thinking I could sort out my horny thing but I am sure that’s gone now as I was so honest "
Some ladies on here meet guys in relationship, others don't, just how it is and a personal choice. But as this thread goes expect that some will give you some moral lectures. Anyhow if she's not into getting the sex going again but otherwise the relationship is healthy, freedom of sex could be a solution but it means to put the question to her rather than going behind her back. |
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If her age is close to yours, she’s likely in perimenopause. It’s the crazy hormone fluctuations before things eventually shut down and you’re in menopause. Her erratic cycles are common during peri , and those same hormone fluctuations can kill her sex drive.
Be kind, be sympathetic, tell her to look on social media for a menopause chicks group. There are several ways that it can be made easier. |
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OP, first use Reply & Quote so people know which comment you are replying to.
Secondly, have you sat her down and had a conversation with her about this? Face to face with kids asleep, or out of the house? Have you asked her where her libido is and what you might be able to do to resurrect it?
Tough conversations and not a one conversation fixer either, in my experience, especially if other half is not comfortable talking about sex, unfortunately.
When you tell us more further advice will be offered  |
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By *avie tCouple
over a year ago
otherside of nowhere |
Op if this is about you its not a new development as your verified by cam 5 years ago....and you have a pic having sex with someone....if it is a friend my apologies...mrs _avie t |
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By *avie tCouple
over a year ago
otherside of nowhere |
Not trying to get at you op...im just a bit confused...but you/your friend should grab the nettle have the talk because life is way too short to be unhappy about something that is a basic need never mind the closeness that a happy health marraige can being.. good luck |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I did. Try my best saying I am horny as hell , maybe she is going true menapase sorry just been honest, I won’t hassle her. As I love her very much , but I am lost to be honest as a man |
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"I did. Try my best saying I am horny as hell , maybe she is going true menapase sorry just been honest, I won’t hassle her. As I love her very much , but I am lost to be honest as a man "
Ask if she'll be prepared to look after you in bed.
If she refuseses, ask her if she has ideas how it can be quelled.
You might get a pass on other meets  |
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By *ordjeffMan
over a year ago
around and about ,as travel. |
"Only you can decide if this is too personal.
Anyhow I guess the way to go is to sit down with the wife and have an open conversation about needs, wants and desires on both sides and take it from there.
I did, it fell on deaf ears "
Same here with me too
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I'm slightly confused here, one minute you're saying it's a friends wife then you say you spoken to "your" wife.....
Anyways I think you need to consider her feelings. She is most likely pre menopausal going by her loss of libido and on a cycle every couple of weeks. Tell her to speak to her gp as she may need some hormone therapy. It's not easy going through this stage in life so be there for her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP, this is something you have to resolve with your partner, none of us here know the true situation of your wife's feelings or the reasons behind her loss of interest in sex.
I would suggest that telling her how horny you are is likely to have the opposite effect to the one you desire, she may feel pressured and resentful. Perhaps try telling her that the lack of sex makes you feel unloved and as if she doesn't value you and the closeness you used to have. Ask her what you can do to get back what you had as a couple in the earlier years. It's very unlikely that she has simply decided to stop having sex for no reason at all, there may be longterm issues which have built up to this and its something that needs to be worked on rather than focusing on the issue of sex.
If you can't get anywhere together, go to counselling. Even if she is reluctant to go, go by yourself. Seeing you determined to resolve your problems may spur her to join you, if not counselling will help you to see exactly where you are heading and what you want to do. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"OP, this is something you have to resolve with your partner, none of us here know the true situation of your wife's feelings or the reasons behind her loss of interest in sex.
I would suggest that telling her how horny you are is likely to have the opposite effect to the one you desire, she may feel pressured and resentful. Perhaps try telling her that the lack of sex makes you feel unloved and as if she doesn't value you and the closeness you used to have. Ask her what you can do to get back what you had as a couple in the earlier years. It's very unlikely that she has simply decided to stop having sex for no reason at all, there may be longterm issues which have built up to this and its something that needs to be worked on rather than focusing on the issue of sex.
If you can't get anywhere together, go to counselling. Even if she is reluctant to go, go by yourself. Seeing you determined to resolve your problems may spur her to join you, if not counselling will help you to see exactly where you are heading and what you want to do. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP, this is something you have to resolve with your partner, none of us here know the true situation of your wife's feelings or the reasons behind her loss of interest in sex.
I would suggest that telling her how horny you are is likely to have the opposite effect to the one you desire, she may feel pressured and resentful. Perhaps try telling her that the lack of sex makes you feel unloved and as if she doesn't value you and the closeness you used to have. Ask her what you can do to get back what you had as a couple in the earlier years. It's very unlikely that she has simply decided to stop having sex for no reason at all, there may be longterm issues which have built up to this and its something that needs to be worked on rather than focusing on the issue of sex.
If you can't get anywhere together, go to counselling. Even if she is reluctant to go, go by yourself. Seeing you determined to resolve your problems may spur her to join you, if not counselling will help you to see exactly where you are heading and what you want to do. "
That's good advice, in my case it's a mix of mismatched libidos exacerbated by alcoholism |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump her, lifes to long to wait around and have boring or in this case no sex 
Well you're going to get along here with that attitude  "
Loosen up would you, im messing!!. Thought the Op might be fed up of hearing all the Jeremy Kyle remedies.
Guess i must of touch a nerve  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
That's good advice, in my case it's a mix of mismatched libidos exacerbated by alcoholism
Yours or hers?
Hers - the hidden bottles kind"
The only reason I ask is that if she already doesnt know your not in here. If you were ever outed it would be bad enough but I think sharing her addiction with a publically viewable forum might not be the most sensitive step |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
That's good advice, in my case it's a mix of mismatched libidos exacerbated by alcoholism
Yours or hers?
Hers - the hidden bottles kind
The only reason I ask is that if she already doesnt know your not in here. If you were ever outed it would be bad enough but I think sharing her addiction with a publically viewable forum might not be the most sensitive step"
It would appear lack of knowledge or insight doesn't prevent you having an opinion. A bit preachy too |
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"Dump her, lifes to long to wait around and have boring or in this case no sex
Well you're going to get along here with that attitude
Loosen up would you, im messing!!. Thought the Op might be fed up of hearing all the Jeremy Kyle remedies.
Guess i must of touch a nerve "
You didn't touch a nerve with me I just found your comment immature and inappropriate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump her, lifes to long to wait around and have boring or in this case no sex
Well you're going to get along here with that attitude
Loosen up would you, im messing!!. Thought the Op might be fed up of hearing all the Jeremy Kyle remedies.
Guess i must of touch a nerve
You didn't touch a nerve with me I just found your comment immature and inappropriate. "
At least my comment was directed towards the contents of the thread, yours is just a typical comment from someone whos head is up their hole and is not needed in the thread. If you didnt like my comment just scroll past and say nothing when you have nothing constructive to add.
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"Dump her, lifes to long to wait around and have boring or in this case no sex
Well you're going to get along here with that attitude
Loosen up would you, im messing!!. Thought the Op might be fed up of hearing all the Jeremy Kyle remedies.
Guess i must of touch a nerve
You didn't touch a nerve with me I just found your comment immature and inappropriate.
At least my comment was directed towards the contents of the thread, yours is just a typical comment from someone whos head is up their hole and is not needed in the thread. If you didnt like my comment just scroll past and say nothing when you have nothing constructive to add.
"
Lol thanks for giving me a laugh. There goes your immature attitude again and sad you think you gave constructive advise is a joke. |
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Same kinda thing happened me 3 years ago. Girlfriend was sex crazed until she fell pregnant. Our daughter was born and after a few months and still no action I asked her what was wrong? She said she felt as tho she had become "A sexual" didn't find me or any man or woman attractive anymore. Didn't know what to do or say. Struggled with that for a few more months until I got a call from her at work one day saying its over and iv gone to stay with my parents. Missus and child gone when I got home. That day sucked ass. Hard to come back from. Still think about it a lot. Still wonder if I'd done this or that or whatever. Have moved on now again with someone new but the pain of what happened is still raw and will be for sometime I would think.
Sounds like your in a no win situation op. Fight with her if you love her tho and don't fight against her. It may just be what saves ye. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
That's good advice, in my case it's a mix of mismatched libidos exacerbated by alcoholism
Yours or hers?
Hers - the hidden bottles kind
The only reason I ask is that if she already doesnt know your not in here. If you were ever outed it would be bad enough but I think sharing her addiction with a publically viewable forum might not be the most sensitive step
It would appear lack of knowledge or insight doesn't prevent you having an opinion. A bit preachy too "
Not meaning to be preachy and I have pretty good insights to tge life of alchoholics. Its just not something I'd share here personally. But each to there own |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here "
My friend there more to relationships than sex.If you love her you not cheat.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here My friend there more to relationships than sex.If you love her you not cheat."
Well that's cleared it up in 15 succinct words. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
That's good advice, in my case it's a mix of mismatched libidos exacerbated by alcoholism
Yours or hers?
Hers - the hidden bottles kind
The only reason I ask is that if she already doesnt know your not in here. If you were ever outed it would be bad enough but I think sharing her addiction with a publically viewable forum might not be the most sensitive step
It would appear lack of knowledge or insight doesn't prevent you having an opinion. A bit preachy too
Not meaning to be preachy and I have pretty good insights to tge life of alchoholics. Its just not something I'd share here personally. But each to there own"
Fair enough and I'm certainly not going to argue. But, when I mentioned alcoholism you yourself asked "yours or hers"
Council for the defence rests. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here My friend there more to relationships than sex.If you love her you not cheat.
Well that's cleared it up in 15 succinct words. "
I always glad to help. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
That's good advice, in my case it's a mix of mismatched libidos exacerbated by alcoholism
Yours or hers?
Hers - the hidden bottles kind
The only reason I ask is that if she already doesnt know your not in here. If you were ever outed it would be bad enough but I think sharing her addiction with a publically viewable forum might not be the most sensitive step
It would appear lack of knowledge or insight doesn't prevent you having an opinion. A bit preachy too
Not meaning to be preachy and I have pretty good insights to tge life of alchoholics. Its just not something I'd share here personally. But each to there own
Fair enough and I'm certainly not going to argue. But, when I mentioned alcoholism you yourself asked "yours or hers"
Council for the defence rests. "
Well yes because if it was your own then all power to you for sharing because it wouldnt be an easy thing to do and is quite a personal issue.
Anyway hope you find what your looking for on here |
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Well you could do what others do, cheat on their wife and become the most popular men on fab?
Me personally, I'd just masturbate for the rest of my life, and hope that she was safe when she was off getting sex from other men, and doing with them all the things she wont do with me, because thats what happens, they don't lose interest in sex, they loose interest in sex with their partner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well you could do what others do, cheat on their wife and become the most popular men on fab?
Is there a list? Like top 50?
I have heard there are annual awards and all, but they wont invite me."
That just means you have maintained your artistic integrity |
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here "
If she is a similar age to you it could be early menopause  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump her, lifes to long to wait around and have boring or in this case no sex "
It is not nice... Yeah, you have a right to say your opinion but you have no idea about marriage and relationships 
OP, you must talk with your wife first. Women have life cycles and for few days or weeks we may be extremely horny then our libido goes down, total zero interest in sex. Additionally, if there is too much stress at work, she might doesnt like herself like she looks (yeah, we women are b...tches to ourselves). All these things may have impact on her sex life too. Talk talk and once again talk. You might be surprised how easy you can fix the actual situation.
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump her, lifes to long to wait around and have boring or in this case no sex
It is not nice... Yeah, you have a right to say your opinion but you have no idea about marriage and relationships
OP, you must talk with your wife first. Women have life cycles and for few days or weeks we may be extremely horny then our libido goes down, total zero interest in sex. Additionally, if there is too much stress at work, she might doesnt like herself like she looks (yeah, we women are b...tches to ourselves). All these things may have impact on her sex life too. Talk talk and once again talk. You might be surprised how easy you can fix the actual situation.
Good luck! "
Wisdom there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here "
If you loved her and your relationship you would love every part of her if not then swing. Don’t move to swing to fast it could be a mistake in long run. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yes I love her very much and we do talk about it she don’t like it either it’s not just me we both know this , we even joke saying well at least you won’t be with anyone else , and before folks say she could be getting it somewhere else no we are 100 percent just us I come on here to perve to be honest |
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It can be very frustrating for other person when other person sex drive is soaring for naughyness we all are human we all like to feel sexy & wanted in a relationship,when it happens it feel like rejection, you're wife can go try own doctor to get things sorted as know myself if was me female half I would ,try talk make her understand how you're feeling ,or go on as you are ,we have right to imateisty as we all human most people dnt set out to do any hurting towards there spouse feelings ,but does happen ,life is a short spin we can judge other people to quick do what you feel is right for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Goldie there is alot of good advice in here, counselling for you as a couple, I would also suggest for you personally also & a medical check up for your wife to investigate the nearly weekly periods.
I would also suggest you also come off Fab & any other dating site you maybe on, it maybe a release but being caught will weaken an already weak relationship. as others have said, "more to a relationship than sex" but w by w ...if on it's going wrong in the bedroom it's going wrong. you both need to step back & honestly look at where you are after all these years together.
Apart from the possible medical issue, people do drift apart & end up staying in a non sexual relationship "for the kids"
you may have alot of decisions to make, some inward looking to do, all best done away from Fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The advice given of do what feels right for you is I feel the worst advice anyone gives in this situation. Primarily they are saying get out and leave her with this and that's what usually happens. It's a selfish reason and selfish motivation.
Did you get together for your selfish motivation or for a mutual reason, what you both brought to the table?
Youre a couple for good reason. You also need to think of 'you' as a couple first and explore all the avenues which others have suggested.
Last resort is then you, and that's probably for the door. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s a man to do if the wife is not interested in sex anymore, and seems to be on her monthly thing every two weeks even she don’t understand why she is , and husband is highly sexed , has a wank each day just to sort him self out and not bother her , asking for a friend not on here "
I'm with you on this.
Had the chats many times, promised changes that only last for a week or two blah blah blah.
I found myself a discreet fuck buddy. She was in the same boat with the hubby only servicing her once every 3 weeks.
She needed more and coz we we're both married it was purely sex. Nothing else on the adjenda.
It works if you find the right buddy.
No emotional involvement so it's not cheating.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I did and she knows how I feel not been meen to her she is cool but well we pass it off at this stage , hence me on here "
. So it's not your friend is it you
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