FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Rejection on here and outside of fab.
Rejection on here and outside of fab.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Every one has had there fair share of rejection. Yes it hurts.
I have rejected guys and even just friendships
Some times it is not abusive and it is done in a respected way.
Other times it is pure vile and makes you feel like pure crap and give up on the whole dating world or just living full stop.
Like if your guT instincts are telling you something is off about a person it is very seldom wrong.
But what is the worst message you received.if you want to share.
I had I'll only do you if I put a bag over your head.
You will never be wife material,your just a cum bucket and a pityfuck.
Your boyfriend must be blind.
You had kids,what poor fuck reproduce with you.or did you get pregnant by sperm donor.
Even a lesbian would lick you.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the worst ones for me are when i turn guys down and they respond with horrible fat shaming messages about how grateful I should be and nobody would touch me etc. I know it's bullshit obvs and it says a lot more about them than me, but those ones get to me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think the worst ones for me are when i turn guys down and they respond with horrible fat shaming messages about how grateful I should be and nobody would touch me etc. I know it's bullshit obvs and it says a lot more about them than me, but those ones get to me. "
I hear you hun. Some do cut deep.
But it was a blessing that it didn't go any further.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Worst about assholes that send abusive mails is that it kinda screws things up for the normal guys that if rejected can just get on with their day without the need to send vile mail.
I do believe that some of the worst messages come from 6th form schoolboys having a laugh in the common room... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not fab related but being told the "you could do/deserve better than me" linr really bugged me.
Its so disingenuous and the person clearly thinks the complete oposite. I like honesty |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Not fab related but being told the "you could do/deserve better than me" linr really bugged me.
Its so disingenuous and the person clearly thinks the complete oposite. I like honesty"
Ye like why say that. It is a pure mind fuck. Isn't that kinda for ourselves to find out if we think we deserve better. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't think I ever sent a vile mail on here or received one. "
That is good.
I have never sent any to guys that have rejected me whatever nice or them been vile. I just accepted it no need to be bitter. As it makes no difference,but just ends up consuming your day. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why bother giving these messages any thought, they are clearly the product of disturbed personalities and should simply be dismissed and not dwelt on. "
Easier said than done at times.
As if it is a continuous event. It does chip away at you.and even harder when it comes from someone who you taught love you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why bother giving these messages any thought, they are clearly the product of disturbed personalities and should simply be dismissed and not dwelt on.
Easier said than done at times.
As if it is a continuous event. It does chip away at you.and even harder when it comes from someone who you taught love you."
We have no control over the actions of others, what we can change is how we respond to them. |
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If tou cannot take rejection on here then you clearly shouldn’t be here. We aint all gonna click with each other and we never going to lnow if we do until we talk... if its a no from either party then move along... getting stressed aint going to make anyone change their mind....
“Oh because i said no and you called me a twat ill sleep with you now!!” Eejits |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
"
what a ignorant twat silver lining you didnt find out he was like that after you were with him  |
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I have no problem with rejection as everybody has their own types or preferences. Not everybody is for everybody else.
Saying no thanks, I'm not interested or you're not my type, etc is totally fine for me but it's when a person adds an unnecessary insult is what bothers me though I tend not to react or let them think it bothers me.
Worst one I ever had was about four years ago when a woman read my profile and said "You're just a waste of space aren't you? You should do yourself a favour and kill yourself".
That was one person I definitely didn't want to meet but sure if people make nasty remarks then it says more about them than what it does about you.
It doesn't bother me what they actually say to me or about it, just more that people can behave in such a way and think it is ok to do so. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why bother giving these messages any thought, they are clearly the product of disturbed personalities and should simply be dismissed and not dwelt on.
Easier said than done at times.
As if it is a continuous event. It does chip away at you.and even harder when it comes from someone who you taught love you.
We have no control over the actions of others, what we can change is how we respond to them. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If tou cannot take rejection on here then you clearly shouldn’t be here. We aint all gonna click with each other and we never going to lnow if we do until we talk... if its a no from either party then move along... getting stressed aint going to make anyone change their mind....
“Oh because i said no and you
called me a twat ill sleep with you now!!” Eejits"
I actually haven't experience rejection on here,(yet).just one nasty comment on a pic I put up,but blocked and delete are just the best part of this.
More so out in the real world.been stood up,Ghosted.Ya know the usual perks of life. But I am still here and enjoying the good times with good people
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By *iiboyMan
over a year ago
Tankardstown |
"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
"
"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
"
Something similar happened with me only in reverse , met a lady id been chatting to a few weeks for cofee in the red cow ,anyhow turns out she had a room booked and when i was reluctant to go up she got very abusive , i tuned it out but as i was leaving i did hear, i was only fucking you for pity, subsequently she told a few people a couple of untrue shit about me but hey cest la vie
[/quote ]
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thankfully in all my experience I've never received any direct abuse.
There have been some general references to cheaters being despicable (no matter how you look at it, its ironic) but I can deal with that. |
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"I don't think we've ever received a nasty message. We should probably thank our lucky stars.
I've probably jinxed it now though. "
Yeah, I was trying to think of something negative to say about ye guys...
Nah, I've got nothing...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
Something similar happened with me only in reverse , met a lady id been chatting to a few weeks for cofee in the red cow ,anyhow turns out she had a room booked and when i was reluctant to go up she got very abusive , i tuned it out but as i was leaving i did hear, i was only fucking you for pity, subsequently she told a few people a couple of untrue shit about me but hey cest la vie
[/quote ]
"
Talk about the great escape. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have no problem with rejection as everybody has their own types or preferences. Not everybody is for everybody else.
Saying no thanks, I'm not interested or you're not my type, etc is totally fine for me but it's when a person adds an unnecessary insult is what bothers me though I tend not to react or let them think it bothers me.
Worst one I ever had was about four years ago when a woman read my profile and said "You're just a waste of space aren't you? You should do yourself a favour and kill yourself".
That was one person I definitely didn't want to meet but sure if people make nasty remarks then it says more about them than what it does about you.
It doesn't bother me what they actually say to me or about it, just more that people can behave in such a way and think it is ok to do so."
That is horrible to say to anyone and yes it's screams that they have serious issues. Lucky escape in all honesty. |
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"I don't think we've ever received a nasty message. We should probably thank our lucky stars.
I've probably jinxed it now though.
Yeah, I was trying to think of something negative to say about ye guys...
Nah, I've got nothing...
"
The worst I could be accused of is berating that poor man at that NYE party!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m gobsmacked to read the examples of messages and abusive behaviour people have been subjected to. No matter what it wouldn’t be nice to be on the receiving end  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Only good experience here but on the normal dating world, read a profile, spent ages writing a message taking her likes and interests and what she said into account, sent the message and within minutes got a reply say "why the fuck would a woman like me ever give an ugly fucker like you the time of day, you should just go ahead and kill yourself now", that hurt, it should not have, she was nothing but some random woman online but it did, I never got many reply on normal dating sites and never got bitter about, it was the woman choice to reply or not but that message made me bitter for a bit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was chatting to this girl on fab for a few weeks, everything was going great then I find out the bitch doesn’t like lasagne!
Needless to say she didn’t get to see my John Thomas.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't say I've ever experienced any of it....everyone I've been in contact with from the site or met at socials and parties has been friendly, pleasant and most definitely not abusive. "
I went to the rvc once with my wife, lovely people there, but that's real life, real people.
I haven't really experienced it here apart from one gobshite who won throll of the year trying to get me down over an Emotional post a while back.. But you'll always have sad people like that, and he didn't succeed  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Being rejected twice in kind way. Im still alive 
It happens. We wouldnt be all the people cup of tea. And yes, have rejected few people on fabs. Ive got two messages back saying "you are a bitch" and "fu..ck you"
Blocked them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
"
That is beyond rude and disrespectful. Don't know what the hell some people get out of that. Totally unacceptable. God I prefer to respect the ladies and couples on here. Life is too short. Better happy and being rude like that. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
That is beyond rude and disrespectful. Don't know what the hell some people get out of that. Totally unacceptable. God I prefer to respect the ladies and couples on here. Life is too short. Better happy and being rude like that. Xxx"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Every one has had there fair share of rejection. Yes it hurts.
I have rejected guys and even just friendships
Some times it is not abusive and it is done in a respected way.
Other times it is pure vile and makes you feel like pure crap and give up on the whole dating world or just living full stop.
Like if your guT instincts are telling you something is off about a person it is very seldom wrong.
But what is the worst message you received.if you want to share.
I had I'll only do you if I put a bag over your head.
You will never be wife material,your just a cum bucket and a pityfuck.
Your boyfriend must be blind.
You had kids,what poor fuck reproduce with you.or did you get pregnant by sperm donor.
Even a lesbian would'nt lick you.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
Holy shit... that's brutal.. you know what, that's just bad karma on him. There's no words to describe that..
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On behalf of all the decent men on this who actually want to treat Women with respect I apologise sincerely for all the Gobshites who think it's funny and and enjoy playing mindfuck games with all Ladies on this. I'm ashamed to know that men..and Women..out there do that and just know there is decent human beings out there who'll treat you all with the respect and care that you all deserve. xx |
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
"
I think we are all shades and all shapes, and we all gorgeous in our own way , don't let anyone change your inner light |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have rejected and being rejected by many through fab and off of fab.its part of experencing life making mistakes and learning by them.you build urself back up again and move onwards abd do not look backwards. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Latest and probably the worst ever and there has been quite a few over the years. Chatted to a guy here for few weeks and finally got to arrange a coffee meet (joys of shift work).
The guy came into the coffee shop, I stood up and has he approached he looked me up and down I put out my hand "hi xxxx, I'm xxxx " his reply was "oh no your not for me" turned on his heels and left me standing in middle of coffee shop.
Now this guy knew exactly what I looked like, I am very clear to any guy I chat with I'm fat. Have to say it completely floored me.
I think we are all shades and all shapes, and we all gorgeous in our own way , don't let anyone change your inner light "
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I’d pass no thought to this you can’t be everybody cup of tea I’ve rejected and been rejected but never got personal or Abusive towards anybody but I tell you want is a little bit annoying is when you put effort into first message and it gets read but no reply but sure look you will always meet rude ppl here and outside of here op |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The worst one I have gotten is when I politely told a guy I wasn’t interested he told me that he was going to track me down and r**e me and kick the crap out of me and leave me for dead by the one he was finished with me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst one I have gotten is when I politely told a guy I wasn’t interested he told me that he was going to track me down and r**e me and kick the crap out of me and leave me for dead by the one he was finished with me "
I hope to God you went straight to the Gardai with this.. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’d pass no thought to this you can’t be everybody cup of tea I’ve rejected and been rejected but never got personal or Abusive towards anybody but I tell you want is a little bit annoying is when you put effort into first message and it gets read but no reply but sure look you will always meet rude ppl here and outside of here op"
I will be honest,I get easily distracted as I am a single mum,Did work 12hr shifts as a health care Assistant and I am a part time student to become a SNA. so I don't always pay attention to the messages,I don't mean to be rude. And I then know that I have missed out,my loss. So I do understand the frustration. But it doesn't help either when you are bombard by the same person with different messages. Yes I know that I have single guys blocked. For a while at the moment.that is due to the fact that I wore myself thin. Ain't my fault that the male female ratio isn't even. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst one I have gotten is when I politely told a guy I wasn’t interested he told me that he was going to track me down and r**e me and kick the crap out of me and leave me for dead by the one he was finished with me I hope to God you went straight to the Gardai with this.."
It was just from a keyboard warrior I don’t let things like that get to me, I just reported him and blocked |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Only good experience here but on the normal dating world, read a profile, spent ages writing a message taking her likes and interests and what she said into account, sent the message and within minutes got a reply say "why the fuck would a woman like me ever give an ugly fucker like you the time of day, you should just go ahead and kill yourself now", that hurt, it should not have, she was nothing but some random woman online but it did, I never got many reply on normal dating sites and never got bitter about, it was the woman choice to reply or not but that message made me bitter for a bit"
That is so horrible.
Just cannot understand the reason why anyone would say such a thing like that. To literally tell someone to kill themselves. And then they wonder why people snap and do end it. That was a blessing in it self that you didn't get to meet her. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The worst one I have gotten is when I politely told a guy I wasn’t interested he told me that he was going to track me down and r**e me and kick the crap out of me and leave me for dead by the one he was finished with me I hope to God you went straight to the Gardai with this.."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh I've been called so many names I just block and forget them.. "
Boglady the only names you should be called on this site are: beautiful, sexy, very attractive! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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There are a lot of hurt angry people out there,and they don't know how to break the circle.
And you end up with what happens now.
Look unrequited love hurts. But it doesn't give anyone the right to be so horrible.
But thank God for the one who are sometimes misjudged until you get to know them and turn out to be the best thing to enter your life.
As we are all guilty of making quick judgements and Assumption.
I never claim to be 100% perfect and I am aware that I am not every one cuppa or that I don't have super powers to make men/man love me forever.
You can't make someone love you.
But you will find that there will be plenty that would just fuck ya. But you can't let that eat a way at you. And it works that way for men as much as women.
Plus a snake always know what it is,it's just others what it to be something else. It's a human flaw to try and change someone else into your imagination person. Only to realise that you don't like what they are.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On behalf of all the decent men on this who actually want to treat Women with respect I apologise sincerely for all the Gobshites who think it's funny and and enjoy playing mindfuck games with all Ladies on this. I'm ashamed to know that men..and Women..out there do that and just know there is decent human beings out there who'll treat you all with the respect and care that you all deserve. xx"
Couldn't agree more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On behalf of all the decent men on this who actually want to treat Women with respect I apologise sincerely for all the Gobshites who think it's funny and and enjoy playing mindfuck games with all Ladies on this. I'm ashamed to know that men..and Women..out there do that and just know there is decent human beings out there who'll treat you all with the respect and care that you all deserve. xx
Couldn't agree more "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Love the new "send direct photo" feature
Screen grab pic followed by something like
Without trying to be funny or anything, but have you ever given any thought to becoming a site supporter. Amongest other features, it allows one to see messages in a messaging app thread format much like you have on WhatsApp etc.
Plus you clearly haven't read our profile, add to that a repeated (more than once), copy and paste message.
So on that evidence, we are politely going to have to decline your offer to chat, we do hope this advice is taken well and that it is seen in the good light that it was meant. We also hope you carry on enjoying the site
Happy fabbing
Xxx
HB & WB
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're the bottom of the food chain boys "
We wouldn't go that far, we both previously had single profiles on here, and Mr on other sites some in other countries and others in Ireland before this site became popular. It ain't dynamical systems and differential equations we are talking about here. Its mostly just basic social interaction. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're the bottom of the food chain boys
We wouldn't go that far, we both previously had single profiles on here, and Mr on other sites some in other countries and others in Ireland before this site became popular. It ain't dynamical systems and differential equations we are talking about here. Its mostly just basic social interaction. "
your spot on a bit of polite chat go's a long way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dont see the logic behind it... u message cuz ur interested.. u dont get the reply u wanted.. why dont down the route of giving abuse... be polite n respectful to all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Rejection only hurts if you let it..if somebody rejects you thats their problem..laugh and move on "
That's a very good way to think of things very Zen like |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dont see the logic behind it... u message cuz ur interested.. u dont get the reply u wanted.. why dont down the route of giving abuse... be polite n respectful to all"
I dont think logic is a stong point for the people sending the abuse |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dont see the logic behind it... u message cuz ur interested.. u dont get the reply u wanted.. why dont down the route of giving abuse... be polite n respectful to all"
Its only a proof that some people stop developing at the stage being in the preschool 
They just don't get the point that being rude is a big failure
Well, for most of them it might be a kind of a game too. Just move on and don't think too much about them.
Life is wonderful even with these kind of extras
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