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Divorce in Ireland
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?"
Don't think it's so much a waiting list as a cooling off period just to be sure divorce is what u want |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
Don't think it's so much a waiting list as a cooling off period just to be sure divorce is what u want "
I have 1.5 years to go to my divorce and I understand the cooling off period to ensure theres no chance of reconciliation but 4 yrs is a bit long. |
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By *igertigerCouple (MM)
over a year ago
nr Letterkenny |
"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?"
much too long should be reduced to 12
months |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is talk of cutting it to 2 years. I don't think a referendum is needed for this. 4 years is way too long. 2 I think would be long enough. As another poster mentioned it's a cooling off period and to see if there is reconciliation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There is talk of cutting it to 2 years. I don't think a referendum is needed for this. 4 years is way too long. 2 I think would be long enough. As another poster mentioned it's a cooling off period and to see if there is reconciliation. "
2 years is much more reasonable. Some people find it hard to move on and I think the closure of divorce would help. |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
Don't think it's so much a waiting list as a cooling off period just to be sure divorce is what u want
I have 1.5 years to go to my divorce and I understand the cooling off period to ensure theres no chance of reconciliation but 4 yrs is a bit long."
While I agree with u that's what the good politicians of the time thought was needed to stem the flood of expected divorce proceedings and somehow I'd say they were led by their religious beliefs,What they didn't take into account was the amount of people living in complete misery and poverty due to relationship breakdown |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There is talk of cutting it to 2 years. I don't think a referendum is needed for this. 4 years is way too long. 2 I think would be long enough. As another poster mentioned it's a cooling off period and to see if there is reconciliation.
2 years is much more reasonable. Some people find it hard to move on and I think the closure of divorce would help. "
I agree 100% with this. I think divorce would bring closure. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There is talk of cutting it to 2 years. I don't think a referendum is needed for this. 4 years is way too long. 2 I think would be long enough. As another poster mentioned it's a cooling off period and to see if there is reconciliation.
2 years is much more reasonable. Some people find it hard to move on and I think the closure of divorce would help. "
Yes I agree with you. And for the people who have moved on 4 years is a long time to wait for closure. There are also financial implications to having to wait four years too. Things like inheritance and changes in circumstances become relevant again when the divorce comes around |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I'm thinking if I meet the love of my life (again) and we want to marry asap I've to convince her to hold off for 4 years before we can do so. (Not that I will meet her..can't even get a "hello" or "not interested" on this or dating sites lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
Don't think it's so much a waiting list as a cooling off period just to be sure divorce is what u want
I have 1.5 years to go to my divorce and I understand the cooling off period to ensure theres no chance of reconciliation but 4 yrs is a bit long.
While I agree with u that's what the good politicians of the time thought was needed to stem the flood of expected divorce proceedings and somehow I'd say they were led by their religious beliefs,What they didn't take into account was the amount of people living in complete misery and poverty due to relationship breakdown "
Exactly! I have to go to court for a judicial separation as we can't agree to each others terms for a legal separation. Judicial separation is a quick pass to a divorce but without legal aid, you're talking 10k to go to court for it. It's all very silly.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't get married in the first place...... and problem solved.  "
lol I knew a idiot of a young lad from limerick who proposed to a young woman when he was seventeen lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
Don't think it's so much a waiting list as a cooling off period just to be sure divorce is what u want
I have 1.5 years to go to my divorce and I understand the cooling off period to ensure theres no chance of reconciliation but 4 yrs is a bit long.
While I agree with u that's what the good politicians of the time thought was needed to stem the flood of expected divorce proceedings and somehow I'd say they were led by their religious beliefs,What they didn't take into account was the amount of people living in complete misery and poverty due to relationship breakdown
Exactly! I have to go to court for a judicial separation as we can't agree to each others terms for a legal separation. Judicial separation is a quick pass to a divorce but without legal aid, you're talking 10k to go to court for it. It's all very silly. "
The cost of it..even when everyone agrees..is disgraceful. I'd say there's a lot of separated couples who just can't afford the divorce. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don't get married in the first place...... and problem solved. lol I knew a idiot of a young lad from limerick who proposed to a young woman when he was seventeen lol"
Are they still together? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
 "
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well. "
It's when you split up! You have to tell your solicitor the date.
My solicitor was saying if it can be proven in court that you both went back to each other for a booty call, the 4 yrs starts all over again..  no chance |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well.
It's when you split up! You have to tell your solicitor the date.
My solicitor was saying if it can be proven in court that you both went back to each other for a booty call, the 4 yrs starts all over again.. no chance"
thanks for the advice. Definitely no booty call, that's for sure. She had somebody else for that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well.
It's when you split up! You have to tell your solicitor the date.
My solicitor was saying if it can be proven in court that you both went back to each other for a booty call, the 4 yrs starts all over again.. no chance thanks for the advice. Definitely no booty call, that's for sure. She had somebody else for that. "
Ah chin up, you'll be grand  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well.
It's when you split up! You have to tell your solicitor the date.
My solicitor was saying if it can be proven in court that you both went back to each other for a booty call, the 4 yrs starts all over again.. no chance thanks for the advice. Definitely no booty call, that's for sure. She had somebody else for that.
Ah chin up, you'll be grand "
Aww thank you. I've found a very close friend who is keeping me very sane through this whole process.Have a great Sunday. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well. "
You don't need actual proof..you need to be certain of the date you last were together as man and wife. The date the relationship broke down..or as near to it as the week or for example things were bad during the summer and we split up by Halloween.. |
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By *DSGCouple
over a year ago
That place in |
"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well.
It's when you split up! You have to tell your solicitor the date.
My solicitor was saying if it can be proven in court that you both went back to each other for a booty call, the 4 yrs starts all over again.. no chance"
Not that I'd anything to worry about but solicitor told me that as well.
Once your relationship has broken up is a pretty loose term but basically when you are no longer living the same way as you were beforehand. For example: if you've only one bed, you can still be sleeping in it together as long as that is ALL you do. Of course it needs your ex to be honest and admit that... Luckily for me, mine was. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's 4 years from the time you stopped being in a relationship with your ex not 4 years from when you get a legal separation.
really? What defines a relationship though? Is it the last time yous had sex together? Is it from the time she said she was in love with someone else? Sorry for the questions here. I suppose all of the above needs proof as well.
It's when you split up! You have to tell your solicitor the date.
My solicitor was saying if it can be proven in court that you both went back to each other for a booty call, the 4 yrs starts all over again.. no chance
Not that I'd anything to worry about but solicitor told me that as well.
Once your relationship has broken up is a pretty loose term but basically when you are no longer living the same way as you were beforehand. For example: if you've only one bed, you can still be sleeping in it together as long as that is ALL you do. Of course it needs your ex to be honest and admit that... Luckily for me, mine was. "
I asked my ex a few times could we split up and he kept saying no but I just used the date that he eventually did go. but I suppose I could have used any of the previous dates too. |
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?"
I dont think its long at all..The reason why you got married to that person in the first case is becuse you were both in love..how can you just stop loving someone after a year or 2 years..4 years would make your mind up the love would be gone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
I dont think its long at all..The reason why you got married to that person in the first case is becuse you were both in love..how can you just stop loving someone after a year or 2 years..4 years would make your mind up the love would be gone "
Have you ever been married and not wanting to be married to that person anymore but still be financially and legally tied to that person??? What about abusive marriages? You dont know what you're talking about... |
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
I dont think its long at all..The reason why you got married to that person in the first case is becuse you were both in love..how can you just stop loving someone after a year or 2 years..4 years would make your mind up the love would be gone
Have you ever been married and not wanting to be married to that person anymore but still be financially and legally tied to that person??? What about abusive marriages? You dont know what you're talking about... "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ridiculous amount of time I’ve 1.5yrs to wait to get divorced I knew straight away it was the right decision to separate never once went back.
Should be done on an individual basis and mediation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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After 7 years separated from my x wife we decided to finalise by getting divorced after being legally separated we went out for dinner together and wrote our own settlements and handed it to our solicitors ended up very cheap i remember the night well i had monkfish |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ridiculous amount of time I’ve 1.5yrs to wait to get divorced I knew straight away it was the right decision to separate never once went back.
Should be done on an individual basis and mediation"
Exactly! Each case should be seen individually. Esp if there's kids involved and there's still hassle cos one parent is having trouble moving on. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"After 7 years separated from my x wife we decided to finalise by getting divorced after being legally separated we went out for dinner together and wrote our own settlements and handed it to our solicitors ended up very cheap i remember the night well i had monkfish "
haha..brilliant. what was for dessert? |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"After 7 years separated from my x wife we decided to finalise by getting divorced after being legally separated we went out for dinner together and wrote our own settlements and handed it to our solicitors ended up very cheap i remember the night well i had monkfish "
Oh I do love a good bit of monkfish |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
I dont think its long at all..The reason why you got married to that person in the first case is becuse you were both in love..how can you just stop loving someone after a year or 2 years..4 years would make your mind up the love would be gone "
Some people are extremely lucky that they fall in love and they stay in love, others aren't. You marry someone and it doesn't work out for whatever reason, doesn't even have to be anyone's fault. 4 years is holding people to randsom. Meditation is a good way to go if you both can agree who gets what. If you can't agree and it goes to court the only people who win are solicitors. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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7 long years it took my Polish exwife and I to divorce.. think Eire 15 or 20 years ago with religion pushing all the buttons in backround to try and get people back together..need I say never again in a million years that scenario.. you live and learn... |
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
I dont think its long at all..The reason why you got married to that person in the first case is becuse you were both in love..how can you just stop loving someone after a year or 2 years..4 years would make your mind up the love would be gone
Some people are extremely lucky that they fall in love and they stay in love, others aren't. You marry someone and it doesn't work out for whatever reason, doesn't even have to be anyone's fault. 4 years is holding people to randsom. Meditation is a good way to go if you both can agree who gets what. If you can't agree and it goes to court the only people who win are solicitors. "
I suppose its like that to stop messers getting married for the sake of it..marrige shouldn't be seen lightly..its a long term commitment..till death do us part |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
I dont think its long at all..The reason why you got married to that person in the first case is becuse you were both in love..how can you just stop loving someone after a year or 2 years..4 years would make your mind up the love would be gone
Some people are extremely lucky that they fall in love and they stay in love, others aren't. You marry someone and it doesn't work out for whatever reason, doesn't even have to be anyone's fault. 4 years is holding people to randsom. Meditation is a good way to go if you both can agree who gets what. If you can't agree and it goes to court the only people who win are solicitors.
I suppose its like that to stop messers getting married for the sake of it..marrige shouldn't be seen lightly..its a long term commitment..till death do us part "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm 6yrs in and still not divorced because the solicitors keep delaying it just to make more money. It should be 1 yr max and it should be at a fixed cost. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I only one who thinks having to wait 4 years for divorce in Ireland is ridiculous? Why can't there be a referendum to cut the waiting list down?
Don't think it's so much a waiting list as a cooling off period just to be sure divorce is what u want
I have 1.5 years to go to my divorce and I understand the cooling off period to ensure theres no chance of reconciliation but 4 yrs is a bit long.
While I agree with u that's what the good politicians of the time thought was needed to stem the flood of expected divorce proceedings and somehow I'd say they were led by their religious beliefs,What they didn't take into account was the amount of people living in complete misery and poverty due to relationship breakdown
Exactly! I have to go to court for a judicial separation as we can't agree to each others terms for a legal separation. Judicial separation is a quick pass to a divorce but without legal aid, you're talking 10k to go to court for it. It's all very silly. "
You will still have to go through the whole divorce proceedings again I'm afraid. And what's agreed for a judicial separation does not necessarily mean will be granted in a divorce. In Ireland the whole lot goes back into the pot again come divorce time. I got a judicial separation but was agreed by the barristers and both parties before we went into court. We still had to go into court for the Judge to rule the settlement. When it gets closer to the court date one side usually asks for settlement talks to see if something can be agreed. Still costs the same amount though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can see the common denominator here. None of you would have a problem if you didn't get married in the first place silly people "
Hindsight is a wonderful thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can see the common denominator here. None of you would have a problem if you didn't get married in the first place silly people "
Oh to be as wise as you lol. I'm actually very relieved I was married. It gave me way more rights when it came to the custody of my children. So that was great insight as they are my everything. |
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"I can see the common denominator here. None of you would have a problem if you didn't get married in the first place silly people
Oh to be as wise as you lol. I'm actually very relieved I was married. It gave me way more rights when it came to the custody of my children. So that was great insight as they are my everything. "
For men yes I totally agree cos men don't have a leg to stand on regards their kids if not married and thats just scandalous in this day and age.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"After 7 years separated from my x wife we decided to finalise by getting divorced after being legally separated we went out for dinner together and wrote our own settlements and handed it to our solicitors ended up very cheap i remember the night well i had monkfish haha..brilliant. what was for dessert?"
Eaton mess i do believe we never did the going back for sex which i think helps as we are still the best of friends |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Separated over 3 years haven't seen him since he left besides to harass me so really if not living as married couple ye should be able to divorce pretty much straight away |
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"What they didn't take into account was the amount of people living in complete misery and poverty due to relationship breakdown "
I'm fairly sure the politicians took that into account, and just don't care.
If they don't care about mental patients being denied water as punishment, why would they give a shit about someone during a breakup?
Do you think they care about women because they brought in Abortion? |
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By *aid backMan
over a year ago
by a lake with my rod out |
"I can see the common denominator here. None of you would have a problem if you didn't get married in the first place silly people
Oh to be as wise as you lol. I'm actually very relieved I was married. It gave me way more rights when it came to the custody of my children. So that was great insight as they are my everything.
For men yes I totally agree cos men don't have a leg to stand on regards their kids if not married and thats just scandalous in this day and age...."
I never married and I have a child I just went yo court and got joint custody in fact I've always got exactly what I wanted through the courts |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There was a bill proposed (and accepted) last year in the Dail on the reduction of the waiting period to two years, it was originally expected that the referendum would be held in November this year but it seems to have been put back till next year.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all the replies to my original question. I very much appreciate it. It's good to get a second opinion on important things in life. "
its a shame you didnt realise that prior to the marriage |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all the replies to my original question. I very much appreciate it. It's good to get a second opinion on important things in life.
its a shame you didnt realise that prior to the marriage "
hillarious.....not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all the replies to my original question. I very much appreciate it. It's good to get a second opinion on important things in life.
its a shame you didnt realise that prior to the marriage hillarious.....not."
i know, theres more fun on donalds thread |
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Personally I think 2 yrs maybe is enough give people time to calm down and actually decide if divorce is the best option ....
Also throwing the divorce card evertime a row occurs is not right either
. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I think 2 yrs maybe is enough give people time to calm down and actually decide if divorce is the best option ....
Also throwing the divorce card evertime a row occurs is not right either
."
I think there should be fast-track divorces for anyone whose partner keeps threatening it every time there's a row  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There are ways of making the divorce go quicker.
If you've gone to marriage counselling that helps speed up the process.And a cut throat lawyer.
"
I wanted to go to marriage counselling but my ex turned it down point blank. A third person came on the scene and it was game over at that stage. I'm just looking to get closure very quickly, forget everything and try to move on as best as possible. We can't go down the line of solicitors just yet due to the cost. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are ways of making the divorce go quicker.
If you've gone to marriage counselling that helps speed up the process.And a cut throat lawyer.
I wanted to go to marriage counselling but my ex turned it down point blank. A third person came on the scene and it was game over at that stage. I'm just looking to get closure very quickly, forget everything and try to move on as best as possible. We can't go down the line of solicitors just yet due to the cost."
Gettting a solicitor was the best money i ever spent.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There are ways of making the divorce go quicker.
If you've gone to marriage counselling that helps speed up the process.And a cut throat lawyer.
I wanted to go to marriage counselling but my ex turned it down point blank. A third person came on the scene and it was game over at that stage. I'm just looking to get closure very quickly, forget everything and try to move on as best as possible. We can't go down the line of solicitors just yet due to the cost.
Gettting a solicitor was the best money i ever spent.
"
Thank you for the advice, I know it's something we both have to look into to get everything finalised. The quicker we have no contact whatsoever the better it will be for me. Hope the rest of your Monday is going good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are ways of making the divorce go quicker.
If you've gone to marriage counselling that helps speed up the process.And a cut throat lawyer.
I wanted to go to marriage counselling but my ex turned it down point blank. A third person came on the scene and it was game over at that stage. I'm just looking to get closure very quickly, forget everything and try to move on as best as possible. We can't go down the line of solicitors just yet due to the cost.
Gettting a solicitor was the best money i ever spent.
Thank you for the advice, I know it's something we both have to look into to get everything finalised. The quicker we have no contact whatsoever the better it will be for me. Hope the rest of your Monday is going good. "
Go to mediation, solicitors can have a vested interest in dragging things out. A mediator will involve you both in aiming for an equitable and fair agreement which can then be used as the basis for legal separation and divorce. The more amicably things can be done the better in the long run, both financially and psychologically. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There are ways of making the divorce go quicker.
If you've gone to marriage counselling that helps speed up the process.And a cut throat lawyer.
I wanted to go to marriage counselling but my ex turned it down point blank. A third person came on the scene and it was game over at that stage. I'm just looking to get closure very quickly, forget everything and try to move on as best as possible. We can't go down the line of solicitors just yet due to the cost.
Gettting a solicitor was the best money i ever spent.
Thank you for the advice, I know it's something we both have to look into to get everything finalised. The quicker we have no contact whatsoever the better it will be for me. Hope the rest of your Monday is going good.
Go to mediation, solicitors can have a vested interest in dragging things out. A mediator will involve you both in aiming for an equitable and fair agreement which can then be used as the basis for legal separation and divorce. The more amicably things can be done the better in the long run, both financially and psychologically."
Mediation all done and dusted along with an agreement signed. She even complimented on how well we get on together.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are ways of making the divorce go quicker.
If you've gone to marriage counselling that helps speed up the process.And a cut throat lawyer.
I wanted to go to marriage counselling but my ex turned it down point blank. A third person came on the scene and it was game over at that stage. I'm just looking to get closure very quickly, forget everything and try to move on as best as possible. We can't go down the line of solicitors just yet due to the cost.
Gettting a solicitor was the best money i ever spent.
Thank you for the advice, I know it's something we both have to look into to get everything finalised. The quicker we have no contact whatsoever the better it will be for me. Hope the rest of your Monday is going good.
Go to mediation, solicitors can have a vested interest in dragging things out. A mediator will involve you both in aiming for an equitable and fair agreement which can then be used as the basis for legal separation and divorce. The more amicably things can be done the better in the long run, both financially and psychologically.Mediation all done and dusted along with an agreement signed. She even complimented on how well we get on together.."
then you're already way ahead of most couples. |
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