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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So ladies.... You come home to find I've got your significant other bound and gagged. He hasn't been the best boy lately and you're feeling selfish and horny.... Do we show him how you should be pleasured or are the cops called?! |
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.gutted...
thought i was going to be able to pass down an old family heirloom of advice where you arm yourself with a cattle prod then bind the sheeps hind legs deep into your wellies and enter flossy from behind for an incredible farmyard experience... |
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An English guy (the buggers you kicked out nearly 100 years ago and we have to live next door to) is travelling back home through the hills of mid Wales when needing a comfort stop and some refreshment stops at this very remote pub in the middle of no where... Parking up he is a little surprised by the number of cars parked up.. Its miles since he passed a village.. Also as he approaches the door he can hear the buzz of conversation coming from within...
Entering silence befalls the pub and everyone watches as he approaches the bar where the barman greets him.. "evening sir, what can I get you" the English guy asks for a shandy... "you not be from these parts" asks the barman.. "no I'm from over the border"... "what brings you round here, if you don't mind me asking" enquires the barman, with everyone listening intently to this developing conversation... "I'm a travelling salesman on my way home".... "oh what you be selling then" "well actually I sell what I make"... Captivated the barman asks "what do you make then..." actually I'm a taxidermist".... "taxidermist...? What would a taxidermist be then..?" puzzled the barman asks.. "I suppose the easiest and simplest way what I do is that stuff animals"... Turning to the enthralled pub audience the barman shouts "it's OK boys he's one of us!!!!" |
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"Or.... how the fook you got into my house in the first place.
I could be wrong , but me thinks that's called breaking and entering.   "
I know what your thinking. Lock all doors and windows to keep him inside for yourself. Lol |
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