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Chuck Norris jokes

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I’m sure a few of you remember these lol ,post away the the ones that can

This is one of my favorites

Chuck Norris invented giraffes by uppercutting horse

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’m sure a few of you remember these lol ,post away the the ones that can

This is one of my favorites

Chuck Norris invented giraffes by uppercutting horse "

Oooh my favourite Google where is Chuck Norris

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’m sure a few of you remember these lol ,post away the the ones that can

This is one of my favorites

Chuck Norris invented giraffes by uppercutting horse

Oooh my favourite Google where is Chuck Norris "

Chuck Norris is the only man to lose his virginity before his father

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By *eggmothoin75Man  over a year ago

close to you

Chuck Norris was born, next day world war 2 over. True story

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

When chuck Norris just push ups he pushes the earth away from himself

FACT

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

During meteor showers Chuck Norris runs outside with a bar of soap.

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By *otnwild69Couple  over a year ago

cork city

Before he goes to sleep the boogieman looks under his bed for Chuck Norris.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

When chuck Norris _umps into water he doesn’t get wet the water gets chuck Norrised

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By *ombikerMan  over a year ago

the right side of the river

Chuck Norris sleeps with the lights on, because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Jesus may have walked on water but Chuck Norris can swim on land.

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By *acko10Man  over a year ago

Limerick

[Removed by poster at 10/05/18 20:23:15]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity.............twice.

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By *umpsMan  over a year ago

city

When David Banner gets angry is turns into the hulk.. when the hulk gets angry he turns into chuck Norris

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When Chuck Norris moved out of his parents house he turned to his father before he walked out and said "Dad, you're the man of the house now"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"When chuck Norris _umps into water he doesn’t get wet the water gets chuck Norrised "

I genuinely lol'd!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris was walking down the street and got a boner.

There were no survivors!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Alexander Graham Bell invented the phone,he had 2 missed calls from Chuck Norris...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Chuck Norris once did a round house kick so fast his foot went back in time and killed hitler

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck norris can divide by zero.

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By *ustin-SiderMan  over a year ago

Belfast

During the last cold weather spell my nipples got so hard they challenged Chuck Norris to a street fight.

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By *eiseguy83Man  over a year ago

Waterford

When learning CPR Chuck Norris actually brough the practice dummy to life

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By *andsomeman100Man  over a year ago

Ah sure now...

Chuck Norris has a Fab meet this weekend.

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By *ichael McCarthyMan  over a year ago

Lucan

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Death once had a near chuck norris experience

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris only dates Single males!

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By *ustin-SiderMan  over a year ago

Belfast


"Death once had a near chuck norris experience "

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By *ohnandGemCouple  over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris once had a boomerang...but it was too frightened to come back to him.

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By *oby.mobyMan  over a year ago

waterford

Chuck Norris doesnt switch on the light, he switches off the dark.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love this thread...

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars that's why there are no signs of life...!!!

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By *oo32Man  over a year ago

tipperary

Chuck norris doesnt wear a condom...cause theres no such thing as protection from chuck norris

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By *ealOne74Man  over a year ago

limerick

Chuck Norris is waking up the alarm clock...

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By *andsomeman100Man  over a year ago

Ah sure now...

Chuck Norris was the first to discover you could milk a cow.

...But no one had the balls to ask him what he was doing at the time.

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By *razy-88Man  over a year ago

Belfast-carlingford

Used to love these!!

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72 and they're all poisonous

Mr.T isn’t afraid of flying, he scared of running into chuck Norris up there and having nowhere to run

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown


"Chuck Norris once did a round house kick so fast his foot went back in time and killed hitler"

----------------------------

When Chuck saw Bruce Lee for the first time, he threw a beautiful roundhouse kick missing the television but kicking the over a flower vase and stubbing his big toe...

With all the crying and commotion going on, his mammy banned him from watching any tv violence for a week. Chuck was inconsolable

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown


"Chuck Norris is waking up the alarm clock..."

----------------------

After waking up Chuck used to have Frosties but has stopped as Frosties go straight to Chuck's thighs

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown


"When David Banner gets angry is turns into the hulk.. when the hulk gets angry he turns into chuck Norris"

-------------------

Chuck Norris tried to dry hump MC Hammer's leg...

but ended up crying when Hammer said

"You can't touch this"

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown

Chuck Norris fought Rambo, Bruce Lee, The Fantastic 4 and Wonder Woman all on the night

...and lost

...then to make matters worse, he was barred from ever attending that particular Nursing home again on Halloween Night

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown


"Chuck Norris only dates Single males! "

--------------------

Don't know about that but...

Chuck Norris' milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown

If you yell "Chuck Norris" into the Grand Canyon...

it echoes back "got his ass kicked by Bruce Lee"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris' daughter once lost her virginity.

Chuck Norris got it back

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris has a diary called the Guinness book of world records

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When the president pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris' cell phone rings

Think I’ll stop at that could go on all day.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Chuck Norris isn't hung like a horse,horse's are hung like Chuck Norris lol..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They say theres no chin under chuck norris' beard just another fist

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