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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length, nor is there some magical quota of meets that defines a "real player".
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse...."
I see your point here and I agree but the idea of endless texting and requesting pics ect is tiresome and very common, for me anyway. It’s a swinging site after all. If someone I’m not interested in contacts me I will politely make them aware I’m not interested rather than chat for weeks aimlessly. |
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse...."
I agree to your comment..but i have read threads and comments where someone has gone.to the trouble of arranging a sitter...or traveled a distance..or even booked a hotel and someone doesnt even text to do a dragons den " sorry but i'm out" if any of the above happened me.i would take a 3 day ban and say it out.. might save someone else the same problem. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse....
I see your point here and I agree but the idea of endless texting and requesting pics ect is tiresome and very common, for me anyway. It’s a swinging site after all. If someone I’m not interested in contacts me I will politely make them aware I’m not interested rather than chat for weeks aimlessly. "
And other people prefer to get to know someone before meeting. If you feel you're not getting the quick meet you want yet keep chatting for weeks, then the choice to "waste" your time -as you put it (apparently feeling entitled to payback for your efforts?) was yours alone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse....
I agree to your comment..but i have read threads and comments where someone has gone.to the trouble of arranging a sitter...or traveled a distance..or even booked a hotel and someone doesnt even text to do a dragons den " sorry but i'm out" if any of the above happened me.i would take a 3 day ban and say it out.. might save someone else the same problem."
There is a facility to report no-shows to admin I believe, however naming and shaming would inevitably lead to malicious false reporting, just too many fuckwits out there with nothing better to do. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse....
I see your point here and I agree but the idea of endless texting and requesting pics ect is tiresome and very common, for me anyway. It’s a swinging site after all. If someone I’m not interested in contacts me I will politely make them aware I’m not interested rather than chat for weeks aimlessly.
And other people prefer to get to know someone before meeting. If you feel you're not getting the quick meet you want yet keep chatting for weeks, then the choice to "waste" your time -as you put it (apparently feeling entitled to payback for your efforts?) was yours alone."
I fear your missing my point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse....
I see your point here and I agree but the idea of endless texting and requesting pics ect is tiresome and very common, for me anyway. It’s a swinging site after all. If someone I’m not interested in contacts me I will politely make them aware I’m not interested rather than chat for weeks aimlessly.
And other people prefer to get to know someone before meeting. If you feel you're not getting the quick meet you want yet keep chatting for weeks, then the choice to "waste" your time -as you put it (apparently feeling entitled to payback for your efforts?) was yours alone.
I fear your missing my point. "
I'm not, nobody is forcing you to chat for weeks, if you're not getting the result you desire,move on to someone else. |
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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago
C'est moi Boudoir |
"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse....
I see your point here and I agree but the idea of endless texting and requesting pics ect is tiresome and very common, for me anyway. It’s a swinging site after all. If someone I’m not interested in contacts me I will politely make them aware I’m not interested rather than chat for weeks aimlessly. "
But what you’re describing isn’t necessarily a ‘timewaster’...
As Casey Lee said, “The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length”
Nothing is a certainty in this lifestyle, and a sense of ‘expectation’ it can only leave a bitter taste in your mouth if it doesn’t develope into what you wanted or expected.
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By *inacanTV/TS
over a year ago
Dublin |
"The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length, nor is there some magical quota of meets that defines a "real player".
Fully agree
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !! "
What do you consider a ‘real player’? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think timewasters should be named and shamed.
I agree.. but the site rules protect the fuckers..
Because it's so obviously open to abuse....
I see your point here and I agree but the idea of endless texting and requesting pics ect is tiresome and very common, for me anyway. It’s a swinging site after all. If someone I’m not interested in contacts me I will politely make them aware I’m not interested rather than chat for weeks aimlessly.
But what you’re describing isn’t necessarily a ‘timewaster’...
As Casey Lee said, “The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length”
Nothing is a certainty in this lifestyle, and a sense of ‘expectation’ it can only leave a bitter taste in your mouth if it doesn’t develope into what you wanted or expected.
"
Very true, I take both points on board and infact your correct .. glad I put it out there . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !!
What do you consider a ‘real player’? "
A person who is actively seeking meets rather than collecting pics. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !!
What do you consider a ‘real player’?
A person who is actively seeking meets rather than collecting pics. "
So you think 80% of people are pic collectors? Defo not my experience of fab. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !!
What do you consider a ‘real player’?
A person who is actively seeking meets rather than collecting pics.
So you think 80% of people are pic collectors? Defo not my experience of fab. "
Great thanks for the input. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !!
What do you consider a ‘real player’?
A person who is actively seeking meets rather than collecting pics.
So you think 80% of people are pic collectors? Defo not my experience of fab. "
Your body is absolutely gorgeous, and that's the least interesting thing about you..any pics  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it comes down to entitlement a lot on here, some people think because a person was polite and a few messages when back and forth then a meet was going to happen.
What grinds my gears is when people arrange something and then block you, hide their account or just stop responding. Hard enough to get meets arranged as is. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think it comes down to entitlement a lot on here, some people think because a person was polite and a few messages when back and forth then a meet was going to happen.
What grinds my gears is when people arrange something and then block you, hide their account or just stop responding. Hard enough to get meets arranged as is."
Totally agree !! We have feelings too LOL |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think my biggest problem is when you text a girl based on her description and what she likes even when she has no pics, verifications and bio and she asks for a face pic but when you ask her to do so first it goodbye. Shur I could be talking to a man for all I know ha. |
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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago
C'est moi Boudoir |
"I think my biggest problem is when you text a girl based on her description and what she likes even when she has no pics, verifications and bio and she asks for a face pic but when you ask her to do so first it goodbye. Shur I could be talking to a man for all I know ha. "
You probably are!   |
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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago
C'est moi Boudoir |
People could be chatting for awhile and then become aware of something that makes them change their mind. The idea behind chatting is part of getting to know if you are suited and it's not all apparent in the first message.
Op as you are into stats and trends maybe look back at the stage where communication breaks down perhaps it's something you are saying or doing. Or maybe interest wanes after awhile due to not being able to find time to meet. Getting the logistics right as well as the connection takes time and patience. The majority in my experience are here to swing not collect pic's. Also a lot of people state on their profile that they don't want lengthy conversation so maybe seek out like minded fabbers.
Madame B |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People could be chatting for awhile and then become aware of something that makes them change their mind. The idea behind chatting is part of getting to know if you are suited and it's not all apparent in the first message.
Op as you are into stats and trends maybe look back at the stage where communication breaks down perhaps it's something you are saying or doing. Or maybe interest wanes after awhile due to not being able to find time to meet. Getting the logistics right as well as the connection takes time and patience. The majority in my experience are here to swing not collect pic's. Also a lot of people state on their profile that they don't want lengthy conversation so maybe seek out like minded fabbers.
Madame B"
Very relevant points .. I did apply this to my approach .. being totally open to times and locations making the process as easy and fun as possible. Anyway I’m becoming too focused on the why not and not enough attention paid to the why yes please lol thanks for your response !! |
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"The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length, nor is there some magical quota of meets that defines a "real player".
"
 |
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By *ajobMan
over a year ago
Newtownabbey |
"The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length, nor is there some magical quota of meets that defines a "real player".
"
It is very annoying and a waste of somebodys time when a meet doesnt show and just leaves you in limbo...not good |
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By *antosh69Couple
over a year ago
birmingham |
Been texting by for over a months - texts usually instigated by him late night ...sometimes 8 texts a night asking 'what is she doing, what is she wearing' ...even sending vids of him playing with himself. Then a couple of weeks ago we had the opportunity to meet in his area in a flat we had. That evening, a 'family situation' arose ....and to the last hour he was not saying 'can't come' but rather 'I'll let you know'. The meeting didn't take place.
Carried on texting daily ...and agreed to meet last night. He was 15 miles away and we agreed 10pm at a local pub. When I asked how far he was at 9.40 ....was told 'can we make it later?. I suggested 10.30.
At 10.40 I asked if he was near ....he said 'terrible traffic .....be later. I said OK - but let me know about progress. Hearing nothing at 11 I asked for an eta ....no response...and so I asked again 'how long now'? No reply.
Midnight came and went ....and nothing heard from him - and now it's afternoon the next day ....yet he was on this site in the morning!!! Timewaster you reckon??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People give out about guys not turning up, the amount of woman no shows of late is shocking, it's rude and if it was a guy they would be slated... Report all no shows not just the males  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder what people’s view on the percentage breakdown of timewasters v real players on here ?
Personally I’d say is 80/20 on the side of timewasters !! "
What's you're view of what a time waster is? Don't mind me asking and what might be the generally accepted view of what a time waster is ?.I'm only asking OP. Harry |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Been texting by for over a months - texts usually instigated by him late night ...sometimes 8 texts a night asking 'what is she doing, what is she wearing' ...even sending vids of him playing with himself. Then a couple of weeks ago we had the opportunity to meet in his area in a flat we had. That evening, a 'family situation' arose ....and to the last hour he was not saying 'can't come' but rather 'I'll let you know'. The meeting didn't take place.
Carried on texting daily ...and agreed to meet last night. He was 15 miles away and we agreed 10pm at a local pub. When I asked how far he was at 9.40 ....was told 'can we make it later?. I suggested 10.30.
At 10.40 I asked if he was near ....he said 'terrible traffic .....be later. I said OK - but let me know about progress. Hearing nothing at 11 I asked for an eta ....no response...and so I asked again 'how long now'? No reply.
Midnight came and went ....and nothing heard from him - and now it's afternoon the next day ....yet he was on this site in the morning!!! Timewaster you reckon???"
Yep time waster... I had one where I drove into town for a meet through rush hour traffic... no show and profile deleted on Fab... fucking pathetic but it happens....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had three time wasters in one week, one let on they fell in a quarry and insidently had a meet a few days later and posted it like how can some people be so stupid, I agree they should be named and shamed, get them off fab leaving g us with just genuine people, and there should be a three strike system and your out banning there ip address from rejoining that would sort it out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To us, a person is only a time waster if a meet is arranged and then they don't show up (without a valid excuse).
People may and sometimes do chat for weeks. C tends to do that for a while with some guys as it can be hard to match her or our free time with theirs as her medical condition can play up at times. For many real life also quite often takes over (kids, work, etc). People could have a meet arranged and then something could genuinely crop up such as a babysitter letting them down or a family emergency (someone in hospital perhaps) or being suddenly called into work, and that's ok, these things can happen but it is just common courtesy to let the other people know. Also, after chatting for a while with a meet having not yet been arranged, people have the right to change their mind. C has talked to guys before whom she liked at first but then changed her mind because they started being pushy or constantly sleazing.
The ones that really annoy us though are the ones who go on and on at C about how wonderful she is and how they would so love to meet, etc etc and then when they finally get their chance they flake or go all silent then usually come up with some bullshit excuse about how they got called into work or something came up. We had a guy do this recently. He had chatted C up on Kik every day trying to get her to meet alone. He finally got his chance when we advertised a social meet and it was him messaged us saying he'd be interested. I wasn't available so he would have been getting to meet C on her own. An agreement was in place and after all the pursuing he had done she got silence and heard nothing from him the rest of the day. He messaged late on the next day with a bullshit excuse about how he suddenly got called into work and didn't have his phone with him. Don't believe it but let's say we give the benefit of the doubt. "That's fair enough, things happen, but you can't take just 30 seconds to send a text before going into work or in today's world of technology you couldn't get on the internet anywhere and message our profile and let her/us know instead of wasting our time. It's just common courtesy." He went on the ever growing block list.
I remember another guy arranged a time and place with us for a social meet. We were sat in the bar at 7pm like we'd arranged and there was no sign of him. We messaged him about 8 and the cheeky bugger then turned round and said he is having a few drinks with a friend in another part of Belfast but would be round after. He thought it ok to just keep us on hold and that we would just sit waiting for him. Another guy ended up coming to meet us at short notice then eventually around 11pm the first guy messaged asking where we were. Unbelievable the nerve of some people. Lol
If C and I say we are going to meet then we will usually always follow through and if something crops up we let the other person know.
So far we have only ever let down two people.
One of them was coming to meet us in a bar after he finished work but C took ill and I brought her home.
The guy showed up and waited for an hour before I had checked C's phone and seen the Kik messages then explained to him.
Obviously he was a bit pissed off but once I had explained things to him he was decent about it.
Another one C and I had booked a hotel room but had to contact the guy at the last minute to let him know it wouldn't be happening as C's medical condition was playing up and she was in no fit state. He was totally understanding and we are set to reschedule with him.
Things do happen but it's communication that is key and it is just common courtesy to keep people informed so far as possible.
We've had plenty of guys who have made arrangements to meet then went silent and never heard from again or come up with some bullshit excuse days later. These people we just ignore and/or block and move on. As we become more experienced we are finding it easier to out the fakes and flakes before they can waste our time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only timewaster is someone who arranges a meet and doesn't turn up. Nobody is obliged to meet anyone else just because they've chatted at length, nor is there some magical quota of meets that defines a "real player".
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To us, a person is only a time waster if a meet is arranged and then they don't show up (without a valid excuse).
People may and sometimes do chat for weeks. C tends to do that for a while with some guys as it can be hard to match her or our free time with theirs as her medical condition can play up at times. For many real life also quite often takes over (kids, work, etc). People could have a meet arranged and then something could genuinely crop up such as a babysitter letting them down or a family emergency (someone in hospital perhaps) or being suddenly called into work, and that's ok, these things can happen but it is just common courtesy to let the other people know. Also, after chatting for a while with a meet having not yet been arranged, people have the right to change their mind. C has talked to guys before whom she liked at first but then changed her mind because they started being pushy or constantly sleazing.
The ones that really annoy us though are the ones who go on and on at C about how wonderful she is and how they would so love to meet, etc etc and then when they finally get their chance they flake or go all silent then usually come up with some bullshit excuse about how they got called into work or something came up. We had a guy do this recently. He had chatted C up on Kik every day trying to get her to meet alone. He finally got his chance when we advertised a social meet and it was him messaged us saying he'd be interested. I wasn't available so he would have been getting to meet C on her own. An agreement was in place and after all the pursuing he had done she got silence and heard nothing from him the rest of the day. He messaged late on the next day with a bullshit excuse about how he suddenly got called into work and didn't have his phone with him. Don't believe it but let's say we give the benefit of the doubt. "That's fair enough, things happen, but you can't take just 30 seconds to send a text before going into work or in today's world of technology you couldn't get on the internet anywhere and message our profile and let her/us know instead of wasting our time. It's just common courtesy." He went on the ever growing block list.
I remember another guy arranged a time and place with us for a social meet. We were sat in the bar at 7pm like we'd arranged and there was no sign of him. We messaged him about 8 and the cheeky bugger then turned round and said he is having a few drinks with a friend in another part of Belfast but would be round after. He thought it ok to just keep us on hold and that we would just sit waiting for him. Another guy ended up coming to meet us at short notice then eventually around 11pm the first guy messaged asking where we were. Unbelievable the nerve of some people. Lol
If C and I say we are going to meet then we will usually always follow through and if something crops up we let the other person know.
So far we have only ever let down two people.
One of them was coming to meet us in a bar after he finished work but C took ill and I brought her home.
The guy showed up and waited for an hour before I had checked C's phone and seen the Kik messages then explained to him.
Obviously he was a bit pissed off but once I had explained things to him he was decent about it.
Another one C and I had booked a hotel room but had to contact the guy at the last minute to let him know it wouldn't be happening as C's medical condition was playing up and she was in no fit state. He was totally understanding and we are set to reschedule with him.
Things do happen but it's communication that is key and it is just common courtesy to keep people informed so far as possible.
We've had plenty of guys who have made arrangements to meet then went silent and never heard from again or come up with some bullshit excuse days later. These people we just ignore and/or block and move on. As we become more experienced we are finding it easier to out the fakes and flakes before they can waste our time."
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By *antosh69Couple
over a year ago
birmingham |
My timewaster actually contacted me
being blocked here - and though blocked number on mobile managed to get through on Whatsapp (???how). He said he was sorry...but had 'another meet 10 mins away' and sent a vid of himself in action with someone !!!! So he decided to go there and let us down because it was convenient for him to do so. I told him that we don't lie, cheat or deceive others and that was our standard in life and that his standards were obviously much lower and we couldn't be dealing with people like that.
And he thought his behaviour was acceptable!
What a prat!!!
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