FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > A woman's opinion on compliments...
A woman's opinion on compliments...
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By *easingTim OP Man
over a year ago
Loughlinstown |
I'm a big believer in the motto...
"A few nice words can set someone up for life"
So, if I think that someone,male or female, has earned or deserves a compliment, I'll pay them one 
Now, on meets or with women, I've straight up and honestly told a few women that they look stunning, sexy or that I enjoyed being with them. Some will say "Thank you"  while others have said they find it hard to accept a compliment.
My question is... If a woman is uncomfortable with hearing an honest compliment, should a man stop paying them??
I'd really like a woman's opinion on this... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Generally I think everyone likes to be complimented, regardless of their gender. Some people (men and female) just feel a bit awkward, but that's not to say that you should stop.
Unless of course the compliment is a bit over the top and overtly sexual which can make some women feel uncomfortable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah I find Irish people can be a bit awkward around compliments. If you tell someone "You've lovely legs" or "you've a nice smile," a lot of the time they'll say "oh I hate my legs etc." |
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Its not that its uncomfortable, but women are supposed to be modest. They dont want to actually acknowlegde their own self worth, so theyll reflect the compliment back to the person.
Its like the aldi ad a couple of years ago. A female complimented another female on her dress. Instead of saying thank you modestly, she reflects back saying she bought it in a charity shop while wittering away about it. 
I get embarrased being told i look sexy or that i look lovely and will often turn away or become shy for a few moments.
Its instilled into us to be like that and i believe its an irish thing. We dont want to appear to be overly confident in awesomeness. We just like being awesome
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By *easingTim OP Man
over a year ago
Loughlinstown |
"Generally I think everyone likes to be complimented, regardless of their gender. Some people (men and female) just feel a bit awkward, but that's not to say that you should stop.
Unless of course the compliment is a bit over the top and overtly sexual which can make some women feel uncomfortable."
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Well, can only speak for myself here, but I always try and be as natural and genuine as I can be. Am also very aware of the 3am Night Club Zombies  telling women "ye're gargus luv" 
Not my approach at all, at all... |
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I think you should never stop giving them. Just because the person, on face value, isn't accepting them doesn't mean you should stop. They may actually be trying to accept them.
Once it's a true compliment and not the stuff that gets flung about in here. |
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By *easingTim OP Man
over a year ago
Loughlinstown |
"Yeah I find Irish people can be a bit awkward around compliments. If you tell someone "You've lovely legs" or "you've a nice smile," a lot of the time they'll say "oh I hate my legs etc." "
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Never thought about the Irish thing but is it still embellished within our culture or hardwired in the Irish psyche that its embarrassing to ever accept a compliment as we don't want to stand out or seem big headed in accepting a compliment??? |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
What ever about women sometimes I find it hard to say something like great legs or u look great as they look at u as if ur a perve
Exception being at a swing event they usually take it as it's meant that u do have great legs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sometimes it's hard to accept a compliment but I'm of the opinion that if someone says your looking well .. your pretty ... your sexy .. anything nice just say thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What ever about women sometimes I find it hard to say something like great legs or u look great as they look at u as if ur a perve
Exception being at a swing event they usually take it as it's meant that u do have great legs "
It may be a bit more comfortable for both parties cj, if you weren't holding your cock while giving the compliment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely an irish thing. Personally i do say thank you when i receive a compliment as i dont receive them that often. Was bullied over my appearance for a long time so sometimes its hard to believe a compliment even whdn genuine. |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"What ever about women sometimes I find it hard to say something like great legs or u look great as they look at u as if ur a perve
Exception being at a swing event they usually take it as it's meant that u do have great legs
It may be a bit more comfortable for both parties cj, if you weren't holding your cock while giving the compliment. "
Hey its not my fault TK mac's sold me a trousers with no lining in the pockets   |
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By *easingTim OP Man
over a year ago
Loughlinstown |
"I think you should never stop giving them. Just because the person, on face value, isn't accepting them doesn't mean you should stop. They may actually be trying to accept them.
Once it's a true compliment and not the stuff that gets flung about in here. "
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Am sure there's a lot of men here who appreciate the beauty, classiness or sensuality of a woman's pics and have tastefully said so via pm's...
...as opposed to guys who just flatter to try and get sex or agree with everything that women say here on the forums...
However, if a woman is trying yet failing to accept a man's compliment, should he appreciate her and keep expressing but only on a smaller scale?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think you should never stop giving them. Just because the person, on face value, isn't accepting them doesn't mean you should stop. They may actually be trying to accept them.
Once it's a true compliment and not the stuff that gets flung about in here.
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Am sure there's a lot of men here who appreciate the beauty, classiness or sensuality of a woman's pics and have tastefully said so via pm's...
...as opposed to guys who just flatter to try and get sex or agree with everything that women say here on the forums...
However, if a woman is trying yet failing to accept a man's compliment, should he appreciate her and keep expressing but only on a smaller scale??"
If in a relationship and the woman is failing to accept compliments might just take a while for her to believe there are sincere. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me it depends who is giving me the compliment, if it's someone who knows me well then I will gratefully accept it and say thank you. If it's a guy from here who sends a mail saying 'you're very pretty' when he hasn't actually seen my face and for all he knows I could have a face like a slapped arse, I'll still say thank you but totally disregard it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Generally I pay a compliment...and they usually say something back like " looking good yourself " or something...then I follow with something really smooth like "have you had a recent eye test " |
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"Its not that its uncomfortable, but women are supposed to be modest. They dont want to actually acknowlegde their own self worth, so theyll reflect the compliment back to the person.
Its like the aldi ad a couple of years ago. A female complimented another female on her dress. Instead of saying thank you modestly, she reflects back saying she bought it in a charity shop while wittering away about it.
I get embarrased being told i look sexy or that i look lovely and will often turn away or become shy for a few moments.
Its instilled into us to be like that and i believe its an irish thing. We dont want to appear to be overly confident in awesomeness. We just like being awesome
"
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
I think the Irish are pretty good in making compliments, way better than where I grew up. Therefore I'm rather surprised with that 'it's an Irish thing not knowing to deal with getting a compliment'. I've to say I had to learn and improve my complementing skills that when I arrived on the Irish shores and it's something you can learn. Don't just say it's ingrained in us to be modest or an Irish thing. Be proud, be self confident and enjoy the compliment nothing wrong with it (as long as it isn't just roide flattery) It's lovely to be complimented and it's a good feeling to give compliments. So op don't stop, everyone loves being complimented even if they can't admit it or go shy. |
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By *easingTim OP Man
over a year ago
Loughlinstown |
"Definitely an irish thing. Personally i do say thank you when i receive a compliment as i dont receive them that often. Was bullied over my appearance for a long time so sometimes its hard to believe a compliment even whdn genuine. "
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I suppose that's it... If a person is bullied or belittled in their past and then suddenly someone comes along and says "I think you look stunning"... That compliment has to go up against a belief system that thinks otherwise  ...
Good to see you've made progress there and just looking at your pics honestly think you've great legs too ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Definitely an irish thing. Personally i do say thank you when i receive a compliment as i dont receive them that often. Was bullied over my appearance for a long time so sometimes its hard to believe a compliment even whdn genuine.
------------
I suppose that's it... If a person is bullied or belittled in their past and then suddenly someone comes along and says "I think you look stunning"... That compliment has to go up against a belief system that thinks otherwise ...
Good to see you've made progress there and just looking at your pics honestly think you've great legs too ..."
Thanks |
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By *easingTim OP Man
over a year ago
Loughlinstown |
"I think you should never stop giving them. Just because the person, on face value, isn't accepting them doesn't mean you should stop. They may actually be trying to accept them.
Once it's a true compliment and not the stuff that gets flung about in here.
------------
Am sure there's a lot of men here who appreciate the beauty, classiness or sensuality of a woman's pics and have tastefully said so via pm's...
...as opposed to guys who just flatter to try and get sex or agree with everything that women say here on the forums...
However, if a woman is trying yet failing to accept a man's compliment, should he appreciate her and keep expressing but only on a smaller scale??
If in a relationship and the woman is failing to accept compliments might just take a while for her to believe there are sincere."
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When I was younger I used to have a mate who was like a big brother to me. I was really shy with women and he used to fill my head with "you're as good as any other man" "you've charm... Use it!" "Be yourself" repeated again and again and again
...and do you know what?
It all eventually sunk in!! Met him two years ago and reminded him of all those chats we used to have. So, his compliments definitely worked on me
So, guess I'm passing this on now... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me it depends who is giving me the compliment, if it's someone who knows me well then I will gratefully accept it and say thank you. If it's a guy from here who sends a mail saying 'you're very pretty' when he hasn't actually seen my face and for all he knows I could have a face like a slapped arse, I'll still say thank you but totally disregard it. "
Couldn't have said it any better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its not that its uncomfortable, but women are supposed to be modest. They dont want to actually acknowlegde their own self worth, so theyll reflect the compliment back to the person.
Its like the aldi ad a couple of years ago. A female complimented another female on her dress. Instead of saying thank you modestly, she reflects back saying she bought it in a charity shop while wittering away about it.
I get embarrased being told i look sexy or that i look lovely and will often turn away or become shy for a few moments.
Its instilled into us to be like that and i believe its an irish thing. We dont want to appear to be overly confident in awesomeness. We just like being awesome
"
Exactly!! could not have explained it better myself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its not that its uncomfortable, but women are supposed to be modest. They dont want to actually acknowlegde their own self worth, so theyll reflect the compliment back to the person.
Its like the aldi ad a couple of years ago. A female complimented another female on her dress. Instead of saying thank you modestly, she reflects back saying she bought it in a charity shop while wittering away about it.
I get embarrased being told i look sexy or that i look lovely and will often turn away or become shy for a few moments.
Its instilled into us to be like that and i believe its an irish thing. We dont want to appear to be overly confident in awesomeness. We just like being awesome
Exactly!! could not have explained it better myself "
Have to agree with the above comments. I think the Irish are genetically wired in such a way that we find it difficult to accept a complement. It would be great if we could just say "Thank you" without feeling awkward. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That one gets me all the time "you are Beautiful" when they have only seen your tits.. it's hard to except a compliment on Fab as alot of mails are clearly copy and paste... W |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That one gets me all the time "you are Beautiful" when they have only seen your tits.. it's hard to except a compliment on Fab as alot of mails are clearly copy and paste... W "
you are beautiful  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That one gets me all the time "you are Beautiful" when they have only seen your tits.. it's hard to except a compliment on Fab as alot of mails are clearly copy and paste... W you are beautiful "
And you are a smooth one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me it depends who is giving me the compliment, if it's someone who knows me well then I will gratefully accept it and say thank you. If it's a guy from here who sends a mail saying 'you're very pretty' when he hasn't actually seen my face and for all he knows I could have a face like a slapped arse, I'll still say thank you but totally disregard it. "
Haha that's very true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That one gets me all the time "you are Beautiful" when they have only seen your tits.. it's hard to except a compliment on Fab as alot of mails are clearly copy and paste... W "
Loool men who gives compliments like that have one thing in mind only trying to get up ur nickers and the sad thing is they're getting fack all because most woman like u don't find it attractive |
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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago
C'est moi Boudoir |
Yes the Irish tend to suffer from a compliment complex handed down by generations of people afraid of "getting above their station" but things are changing for both sexes. Women are getting better at recieving them and filtering out the falseness of some I also think it has become ok for women to compliment men also. As in guy's are more open to hearing someone other than mammy say how great they are
Here on fab, virtual compliments are based on persona but also verifications have had a lot to do with that, it's a unique situation were you are rated for all to see! And like compliments paid directly to you, the good and unique one's stand out. I will accept a compliment as genuine if it is based on interaction more so than a straight in and bam. It is possible to introduce yourself without running up someone's hoo ha. I like genuine compliments, who doesn't but not when someone feigns all over you in the first few messages.
Madame
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