FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > How Forgiving are You ?
How Forgiving are You ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Always considered myself as a fairly _aid back guy, water off a ducks back and all that. Recently I was told I hold onto grudges for wrongs that have happened to me, not a nice trait. How forgiving are you ? Do you live and let live, allow people the right to be wrong. Or is it a case of an eye for an eye. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It really depends on what it is.if someone borrowed a fiver and didnt pay it back id get over it....if someone if someone borrowed 500 and didnt give it back then yes i would hold a grudge |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I find it very easy to cut people out of my life if they have done me wrong. Certain people are dead to me. And no fucker comes back from the dead."
Haha I hear ya.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You should forgive everyone who has ever hurt you, for your own sake. Some sorts of betrayals are easier to forgive. When the hurt and anger are really intense, it might not be possible, but ideally you let go of the hurt and anger as time passes .
Whether you should accept them back into your life is a different question. In a way, you have to bet your life on the person who betrayed you and hurt you sometimes over and over again and risk being hurt again . So, generally, not a wise move. It's unfortunate but you will more then Likely have your forgiveness thrown back in your face so it's best to forgive and move on .
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You should forgive everyone who has ever hurt you, for your own sake. Some sorts of betrayals are easier to forgive. When the hurt and anger are really intense, it might not be possible, but ideally you let go of the hurt and anger as time passes .
Whether you should accept them back into your life is a different question. In a way, you have to bet your life on the person who betrayed you and hurt you sometimes over and over again and risk being hurt again . So, generally, not a wise move. It's unfortunate but you will more then Likely have your forgiveness thrown back in your face so it's best to forgive and move on .
"
Very wise words lady  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Na forgive and forget life too short for holding grudges you could be dead tomorrow
Is that a threat? 
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I will fuck you to death smart arse  |
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"Na forgive and forget life too short for holding grudges you could be dead tomorrow
Is that a threat?
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I will fuck you to death smart arse "
Ooooo, matron!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not !
Yeah, that's what someone was saying about you this morning, well that and other stuff..
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Oh shit no, sorry, the bitching thread is over there! "
Sure if they're talking about us theyre leaving you alone Mick |
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"I'm not !
Yeah, that's what someone was saying about you this morning, well that and other stuff..
.
.
.
.
.
Oh shit no, sorry, the bitching thread is over there!
Sure if they're talking about us theyre leaving you alone Mick "
Bastards! |
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"I'm not !
Yeah, that's what someone was saying about you this morning, well that and other stuff..
.
.
.
.
.
Oh shit no, sorry, the bitching thread is over there!
Sure if they're talking about us theyre leaving you alone Mick
Bastards! "
Never mind. I forgive them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't know. Nobody ever does anything bad to me 
Im not so sure about that Michael, im sure your the type now that would turn the other cheek.
Get your eyes off my cheeks young fella! "
 haha, hey do you want to take your routine onto someone else's thread |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Depends what the situation is sometimes I do forgive but never forget  "
. . . .yes always forgive the first time..... Depending what it is obviously, but some things you can't forget!  |
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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago
C'est moi Boudoir |
"I'm not !
Yeah, that's what someone was saying about you this morning, well that and other stuff..
.
.
.
.
.
Oh shit no, sorry, the bitching thread is over there!
Sure if they're talking about us theyre leaving you alone Mick
Bastards! "
Father Michael, forgive those bastards for they know not what they do! 
After all.... Blessed are the cheese makers! |
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"I'm not !
Yeah, that's what someone was saying about you this morning, well that and other stuff..
.
.
.
.
.
Oh shit no, sorry, the bitching thread is over there!
Sure if they're talking about us theyre leaving you alone Mick
Bastards!
Father Michael, forgive those bastards for they know not what they do!
After all.... Blessed are the cheese makers! "
I think he meant producers of dairy products in general |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do allow people the right to be wrong as two wrongs don't make a right xx "
They would actually have to want to right the wrong for that bw responsible for their own actions and actively work to make amends , a lot of people can't or won't do that . |
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This whole business of "forgive and forget" is B.S. If you get screwed over (on something non sexual), guess what???
You'll get screwed over again and again until you get smart ...
"Forgive but don't forget" is a better rule of law... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it's bad I do struggle to forgive but as I get older that's alot of energy wasted. We all screw up and rarely do people intentialy want to hurt you and if someone does hurt you on purpose it's there's to deal with. They have to live with it you have the control you can let it go... sorry a long answer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do allow people the right to be wrong as two wrongs don't make a right xx
They would actually have to want to right the wrong for that bw responsible for their own actions and actively work to make amends , a lot of people can't or won't do that . "
Yes but if they don't then no point in a person bother no more with the situation, let it go i would say x. Even though i have no idea what this or whom its about lol . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If it's bad I do struggle to forgive but as I get older that's alot of energy wasted. We all screw up and rarely do people intentialy want to hurt you and if someone does hurt you on purpose it's there's to deal with. They have to live with it you have the control you can let it go... sorry a long answer "
,........... . . ..it's okay we forgive you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This whole business of "forgive and forget" is B.S. If you get screwed over (on something non sexual), guess what???
You'll get screwed over again and again until you get smart ...
"Forgive but don't forget" is a better rule of law..."
Sometimes you get screwed over on the sexual stuff too . You are right you do need to get smart but holding a grudge is not healthy and forgiveness isn't for them it's for you and your own well being . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do allow people the right to be wrong as two wrongs don't make a right xx
They would actually have to want to right the wrong for that bw responsible for their own actions and actively work to make amends , a lot of people can't or won't do that .
Yes but if they don't then no point in a person bother no more with the situation, let it go i would say x. Even though i have no idea what this or whom its about lol . "
OP didn't say what it was about . But the point I was trying to make is if you wait for someone to make amnends to be able to forgive them you may be waiting a long time best thing is to forgive , let it go and move on . |
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"This whole business of "forgive and forget" is B.S. If you get screwed over (on something non sexual), guess what???
You'll get screwed over again and again until you get smart ...
"Forgive but don't forget" is a better rule of law...
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Sometimes you get screwed over on the sexual stuff too . You are right you do need to get smart but holding a grudge is not healthy and forgiveness isn't for them it's for you and your own well being . "
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Screwed over in love and lust and have the battle scars to prove it! It's just that I think "forgive and forget" is pure new age dogma, up there with "just accept things as they are" and "think only positive thoughts"
I agree, forgiving is healthy as done properly allows you to take the emotional bag off your shoulders and lay it on the ground...
Forgetting is foolish though as anyone who doesn't learn from past mistakes are doomed to repeat those exact same mistakes. If a (Fab or real) snake bites you once, guess what will likely happen the 2nd, 3rd or 4th time???
I know the above might be construed as bitter, but am actually a very happy go lucky person
Great forum Op |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This whole business of "forgive and forget" is B.S. If you get screwed over (on something non sexual), guess what???
You'll get screwed over again and again until you get smart ...
"Forgive but don't forget" is a better rule of law...
---------
Sometimes you get screwed over on the sexual stuff too . You are right you do need to get smart but holding a grudge is not healthy and forgiveness isn't for them it's for you and your own well being .
---------------
Screwed over in love and lust and have the battle scars to prove it! It's just that I think "forgive and forget" is pure new age dogma, up there with "just accept things as they are" and "think only positive thoughts"
I agree, forgiving is healthy as done properly allows you to take the emotional bag off your shoulders and lay it on the ground...
Forgetting is foolish though as anyone who doesn't learn from past mistakes are doomed to repeat those exact same mistakes. If a (Fab or real) snake bites you once, guess what will likely happen the 2nd, 3rd or 4th time???
I know the above might be construed as bitter, but am actually a very happy go lucky person
Great forum Op "
So forgive and don't forget .
As for making the same mistake , people can be foolish they will believe any lie they are told because they want it to be true . As a result it might take a few times for the lesson to sink in .
You can also be unlucky enough to come across someone who is just very good at lying and being deceptive .
In those cases you can't blame your self just except what happened and mark it off as a lesson learned. You have to learn to forgive yourself too . |
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"I am normally the forgive and never forget type to make sure it wont happen again .
Mr Dirty xx"
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So, if a Fab guy told you he normally lasts longer than the 5 minutes he just did  ... Would you forgive hi "short cummings" or forget about him very quickly soon after?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unfortunately I am cursed with a long memory. We only learn life lessons from bad experiences. That's why I very rarely look back and only look forward with positivity.yabba dabba doo?? |
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