FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > It's not you it's...oh wait no it is you
It's not you it's...oh wait no it is you
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Yeah its one of the drawbacks of doing anything on here. You could restrict your message filters. If you message them first they can reply no matter what the filter says (as far as I know) at least then you'll only hear from people you want to hear from. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone else get overwhelmed with the perviness on here and feel like they need to take a break?
I'm beginning to lose all hope for men...."
Ok where to start....... yes this site can be extremely seedy for a lady I can imagine. I only say imagine, as my profile rarely gets "perved on" let alone anywhere near the amount of traffic that your profile must generate. Ladies put up tasteful and often outright saucy pics....... yours are a bit of a different league and I will explain why ........
Pics of bums or breasts or full length pics are great and can be perved on to an extent........ rarely do they contain face pics too and there is something very personal about that ......at least that's what I believe. I can imagine you could be recognised walking down the street by any guy who has perved on your pics and possibly this could lend to the overwhelming sense of being perved on or seediness you are currently associating with the site?
It is only an opinion ..... And I wil come clean .... I have ADMIRED your pics too......especially because you have face pics ......E. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Anyone else get overwhelmed with the perviness on here and feel like they need to take a break?
I'm beginning to lose all hope for men....
Ok where to start....... yes this site can be extremely seedy for a lady I can imagine. I only say imagine, as my profile rarely gets "perved on" let alone anywhere near the amount of traffic that your profile must generate. Ladies put up tasteful and often outright saucy pics....... yours are a bit of a different league and I will explain why ........
Pics of bums or breasts or full length pics are great and can be perved on to an extent........ rarely do they contain face pics too and there is something very personal about that ......at least that's what I believe. I can imagine you could be recognised walking down the street by any guy who has perved on your pics and possibly this could lend to the overwhelming sense of being perved on or seediness you are currently associating with the site?
It is only an opinion ..... And I wil come clean .... I have ADMIRED your pics too......especially because you have face pics ......E."
I have no problem with the admiration  but its the pervy messages I'm so sick of. Ive gotten so many that I'm beginning to think all men think with one think which isnt fair for the majority of nice guys |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think it's possibly to do with the nature of the site your damned if you do and damned if you don't. Have to say though OP would be fairly openminded and kinky enough so they had to be bad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think it's possibly to do with the nature of the site your damned if you do and damned if you don't. Have to say though OP would be fairly openminded and kinky enough so they had to be bad. "
I cannot attest to the kinkiness or openmindedness of OP (unfortunately).......but maybe it is possible that us guys feel the need to try to raise the stakes when messaging you in order to hopefully grab your attention and stick out from the crowd ??? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Think it's possibly to do with the nature of the site your damned if you do and damned if you don't. Have to say though OP would be fairly openminded and kinky enough so they had to be bad. "
Thanks! Yep I'm very kinky and open minded, i dont think theres anything i havent done or seen but respect goes a long way. I just think its missing from Fab. Like a guy would hardly walk up to you in the street and say "I wanna lick you all over", "I'm staying in ABC hotel lets fuck" etc |
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"Think it's possibly to do with the nature of the site your damned if you do and damned if you don't. Have to say though OP would be fairly openminded and kinky enough so they had to be bad.
I cannot attest to the kinkiness or openmindedness of OP (unfortunately).......but maybe it is possible that us guys feel the need to try to raise the stakes when messaging you in order to hopefully grab your attention and stick out from the crowd ???"
If you read her profile she clearly says no pervy messages though. And raising the stakes to try and stand out might get you noticed but probably not in a good way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think it's possibly to do with the nature of the site your damned if you do and damned if you don't. Have to say though OP would be fairly openminded and kinky enough so they had to be bad.
I cannot attest to the kinkiness or openmindedness of OP (unfortunately).......but maybe it is possible that us guys feel the need to try to raise the stakes when messaging you in order to hopefully grab your attention and stick out from the crowd ???
If you read her profile she clearly says no pervy messages though. And raising the stakes to try and stand out might get you noticed but probably not in a good way."
Yes very true .....but do most guys actually read and TAKE ON BOARD everything written in the text of a profile ?........ obviously not. |
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Interesting...
Ladies have a problem with perviness which I do understand completely.
I have a problem with the general rudeness of ladies and couples on here. A polite messages deserves a polite reply even if it's no thanks.... but the standard ignore the message is rude.. or am I too sensitive? |
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"
Yes very true .....but do most guys actually read and TAKE ON BOARD everything written in the text of a profile ?........ obviously not. "
Id imagine thats a major part of OPs frustration,that shes taken thr time to write it and gets ignored. I dont understand how anyone would start off flirting by demonstrating that they dont care about what the other person wants.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Mechanics dont show their tools when looking for a job so why do men feel the need to?
I'm scarred with the amount of unsolicited dicks ive seen. Yes its a swinger site but theres more to it than anatomy. |
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"Interesting...
Ladies have a problem with perviness which I do understand completely.
I have a problem with the general rudeness of ladies and couples on here. A polite messages deserves a polite reply even if it's no thanks.... but the standard ignore the message is rude.. or am I too sensitive?"
I was talking with a girl who said she got over 100 messages in the first hour after she signed up. Its more polite to reply but with that volume.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Interesting...
Ladies have a problem with perviness which I do understand completely.
I have a problem with the general rudeness of ladies and couples on here. A polite messages deserves a polite reply even if it's no thanks.... but the standard ignore the message is rude.. or am I too sensitive?"
Yes, as those who do reply with a 'no thanks' are often subjected to abusive replies or questions asked as to 'why not'. That's simply why some don't reply! |
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By *ilderMan
over a year ago
dublin |
"Mechanics dont show their tools when looking for a job so why do men feel the need to?
I'm scarred with the amount of unsolicited dicks ive seen. Yes its a swinger site but theres more to it than anatomy. "
I think some only have their 'tools', no personality to back it up... Ohhhhhhhh saucer of milk for Wilder!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Max ive received is 50msgs in 30mins.
To prove my point on perviness, in the past 10mins ive received these two delightful msgs:
"Hey lets fuck"
"You're the type of girl id love to get pregnant" (dick pic included)
It really puts me off the idea of dating even. |
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By *ilderMan
over a year ago
dublin |
"Max ive received is 50msgs in 30mins.
To prove my point on perviness, in the past 10mins ive received these two delightful msgs:
"Hey lets fuck"
"You're the type of girl id love to get pregnant" (dick pic included)
It really puts me off the idea of dating even. "
Oh dear!! Never give up hope, it's all we have   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Oh dear!! Never give up hope, it's all we have "
I'm trying!!! Which is why i feel like i need to take a break but then when i do, i feel like I'm not being me, like I'm suppressing a part of me. Damnit kinks are complicated!
How do you all date with added kinks? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Max ive received is 50msgs in 30mins.
To prove my point on perviness, in the past 10mins ive received these two delightful msgs:
"Hey lets fuck"
"You're the type of girl id love to get pregnant" (dick pic included)
It really puts me off the idea of dating even. "
But you have also received at least one message from someone who has been both polite and complimentary. Someone who took the time to read your profile and respected your wishes ...... may not be to your liking but we are not all muppets !!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Max ive received is 50msgs in 30mins.
To prove my point on perviness, in the past 10mins ive received these two delightful msgs:
"Hey lets fuck"
"You're the type of girl id love to get pregnant" (dick pic included)
It really puts me off the idea of dating even. "
The fact this site is free I think it attracts so many time wasters, fake accounts and people here just taking the piss. I dunno but I think that wouldn't be the case if this site wasn't free. |
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By *ilderMan
over a year ago
dublin |
"
Oh dear!! Never give up hope, it's all we have
I'm trying!!! Which is why i feel like i need to take a break but then when i do, i feel like I'm not being me, like I'm suppressing a part of me. Damnit kinks are complicated!
How do you all date with added kinks? "
Life is complicated I guess. My vanilla dating hasn't been successful in ages, I tend to get bored and happening upon a kinkster isn't easy. Sometimes you think you've found someone on your page but the signals they were giving out was more of a fantasist then a practicer  but we live in hope  |
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The fact of the matter is most guys and lots of girls come on here for nsa sex it is first and foremost a sex site for hook ups,yes there will be people who take it to extremes but if your profile is open access then you must expect all walks and sorts to view comment and message it. In short I guess I am saying if people cannot handle messages from random strangers that contain sexual remarks then they may not best be suited to a social site that caters to the very same thing. |
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"Max ive received is 50msgs in 30mins.
To prove my point on perviness, in the past 10mins ive received these two delightful msgs:
"Hey lets fuck"
"You're the type of girl id love to get pregnant" (dick pic included)
It really puts me off the idea of dating even. "
How could you refuse those charmers?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Oh dear!! Never give up hope, it's all we have
I'm trying!!! Which is why i feel like i need to take a break but then when i do, i feel like I'm not being me, like I'm suppressing a part of me. Damnit kinks are complicated!
How do you all date with added kinks? "
Gave up dating when started enjoying the social part of swinging but im a different age group to yourself and I've lived and had my children so can imagine be quite restrictive to yourself or younger single ladies. |
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"The fact of the matter is most guys and lots of girls come on here for nsa sex it is first and foremost a sex site for hook ups,yes there will be people who take it to extremes but if your profile is open access then you must expect all walks and sorts to view comment and message it. In short I guess I am saying if people cannot handle messages from random strangers that contain sexual remarks then they may not best be suited to a social site that caters to the very same thing."
The issue is that the messages are pretty lacking in imagination, charm and basic respect. Even if its just sex sending "Lets fuck" isnt going to ever work. If thats all a person can come up with, if thats the sum total of their personality then maybe they arent suited to a SOCIAL sex site. |
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"The fact of the matter is most guys and lots of girls come on here for nsa sex it is first and foremost a sex site for hook ups,yes there will be people who take it to extremes but if your profile is open access then you must expect all walks and sorts to view comment and message it. In short I guess I am saying if people cannot handle messages from random strangers that contain sexual remarks then they may not best be suited to a social site that caters to the very same thing.
The issue is that the messages are pretty lacking in imagination, charm and basic respect. Even if its just sex sending "Lets fuck" isnt going to ever work. If thats all a person can come up with, if thats the sum total of their personality then maybe they arent suited to a SOCIAL sex site."
get off yer steed mister knight its a bloody swingers site the clue is in the name. how can people be so offended when they are on a site where 99% of people just want to get their end away and have no qualms in saying so, sheesh the world is full of snowflakes. |
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"The fact of the matter is most guys and lots of girls come on here for nsa sex it is first and foremost a sex site for hook ups,yes there will be people who take it to extremes but if your profile is open access then you must expect all walks and sorts to view comment and message it. In short I guess I am saying if people cannot handle messages from random strangers that contain sexual remarks then they may not best be suited to a social site that caters to the very same thing.
The issue is that the messages are pretty lacking in imagination, charm and basic respect. Even if its just sex sending "Lets fuck" isnt going to ever work. If thats all a person can come up with, if thats the sum total of their personality then maybe they arent suited to a SOCIAL sex site.
get off yer steed mister knight its a bloody swingers site the clue is in the name. how can people be so offended when they are on a site where 99% of people just want to get their end away and have no qualms in saying so, sheesh the world is full of snowflakes."
Ha ha, not intending to white knight anyone. Yeah its a swingers site, but that doesnt mean you have to be lazy and dull when you message someone. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"OP I so understand you!!
I often felt like leave.. and I left..deleted profile, took break.. now back and already again feeling like need break  "
Finally someone who gets it!! |
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These idiots that send dick pics with a first msg without even getting asked for them have zero game you should just ignore them, I do get Pervy msgs off women making demands but just ignore them they will get fed up and not txt anymore. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP I so understand you!!
I often felt like leave.. and I left..deleted profile, took break.. now back and already again feeling like need break
Finally someone who gets it!!"
I get it, too, ladies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I totally get what you are saying OP. The thing is the men who send 'fancy a fuk' type messages are very unlikely to get a meet off here. They are idiots wanking furiously at their keyboards with limited social skills, who wouldn't know what to do with a real woman. Pity them and their sad little cocks. |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
I laugh those messages off, I think it's the only way to deal with them. I certainly wouldn't delete my profile just because of some silly messages. When you delete your profile you only have to go through the ordeal of being a newbie and being bombarded with messages again. Take a break and hide your profile i think would be more sensible. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think it's possibly to do with the nature of the site your damned if you do and damned if you don't. Have to say though OP would be fairly openminded and kinky enough so they had to be bad.
Thanks! Yep I'm very kinky and open minded, i dont think theres anything i havent done or seen but respect goes a long way. I just think its missing from Fab. Like a guy would hardly walk up to you in the street and say "I wanna lick you all over", "I'm staying in ABC hotel lets fuck" etc"
Like misscar said it's the nature of the site. Obviously he's not gonna say that to you on the street!! Kinda like how I don't upload the pics I have here onto Facebook. This is a site for hooking up for nsa sex. It comes with the territory. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dirty messages are expected on a sexsite though no? I dont even read them..im more shocked at the wanna meet or fuck tonight messages when they literally have no idea what you look like..basically implying they will fuck anything  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The fact of the matter is most guys and lots of girls come on here for nsa sex it is first and foremost a sex site for hook ups,yes there will be people who take it to extremes but if your profile is open access then you must expect all walks and sorts to view comment and message it. In short I guess I am saying if people cannot handle messages from random strangers that contain sexual remarks then they may not best be suited to a social site that caters to the very same thing.
The issue is that the messages are pretty lacking in imagination, charm and basic respect. Even if its just sex sending "Lets fuck" isnt going to ever work. If thats all a person can come up with, if thats the sum total of their personality then maybe they arent suited to a SOCIAL sex site.
get off yer steed mister knight its a bloody swingers site the clue is in the name. how can people be so offended when they are on a site where 99% of people just want to get their end away and have no qualms in saying so, sheesh the world is full of snowflakes."
The logic behind this line of thinking is frighteningly stupid. Similar to how someone recently implied that since this is a NSA people obviously don't have morals.
Just because someone likes/wants NSA sex doesn't automatically mean they also want to be treated like something that was scrapped off the bottom of their shoe.
Not only that but the completely lack of intelligence in people who send those kind of messages is going to be such a turn off for 99% of people. If I was Fab straight and meet up with the kinda of guys who send me messages I honestly think I'd need to tie their shoes laces for them afterwards because they are too thick to do it themselves. Not much of a turn-on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The fact of the matter is most guys and lots of girls come on here for nsa sex it is first and foremost a sex site for hook ups,yes there will be people who take it to extremes but if your profile is open access then you must expect all walks and sorts to view comment and message it. In short I guess I am saying if people cannot handle messages from random strangers that contain sexual remarks then they may not best be suited to a social site that caters to the very same thing.
The issue is that the messages are pretty lacking in imagination, charm and basic respect. Even if its just sex sending "Lets fuck" isnt going to ever work. If thats all a person can come up with, if thats the sum total of their personality then maybe they arent suited to a SOCIAL sex site.
get off yer steed mister knight its a bloody swingers site the clue is in the name. how can people be so offended when they are on a site where 99% of people just want to get their end away and have no qualms in saying so, sheesh the world is full of snowflakes.
The logic behind this line of thinking is frighteningly stupid. Similar to how someone recently implied that since this is a NSA people obviously don't have morals.
Just because someone likes/wants NSA sex doesn't automatically mean they also want to be treated like something that was scrapped off the bottom of their shoe.
Not only that but the completely lack of intelligence in people who send those kind of messages is going to be such a turn off for 99% of people. If I was Fab straight and meet up with the kinda of guys who send me messages I honestly think I'd need to tie their shoes laces for them afterwards because they are too thick to do it themselves. Not much of a turn-on. "
It's also frighteningly stupid not to expect those type of messages or to be surprised by them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Oh dear!! Never give up hope, it's all we have
I'm trying!!! Which is why i feel like i need to take a break but then when i do, i feel like I'm not being me, like I'm suppressing a part of me. Damnit kinks are complicated!
How do you all date with added kinks? "
Eh, Why dont you just block men from messaging you so?? Then again, youd miss the ego massaging then wouldnt you... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We put a filter on blocking men from messaging us. It can be very annoying especially when the men feel entitled to meet you, or get more from you than you are offering.
"When are we meeting?" "I am going to cum in your wife's mouth tonight" "send me face pics" ... its all draining.
We got no friend requests until we had friend only pics. Then we were popular.
I would recommend hiding your account. It is a relief because it cuts off the random people who just look to see who is on and message them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Filters, filters, filters!
No need to get 100's of messages a day if you don't want them.
Decide what/ who you want and block the rest out.
I'm not saying that will totally stop the idiots - but it will help |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's also frighteningly stupid not to expect those type of messages or to be surprised by them "
I just chuckle to myself and delete when I get a message from a total cretin
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
It's also frighteningly stupid not to expect those type of messages or to be surprised by them
I just chuckle to myself and delete when I get a message from a total cretin
"
Me too. Tho sometimes its good (bad) to string them along a little |
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"I totally get what you are saying OP. The thing is the men who send 'fancy a fuk' type messages are very unlikely to get a meet off here. They are idiots wanking furiously at their keyboards with limited social skills, who wouldn't know what to do with a real woman. Pity them and their sad little cocks."
Very funny! But very true haha |
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