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Help For Newbie

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Hey. Just simple question well plea for help. I'm newish on here and genuine but it seems like it's next to impossible to meet anyone here. I ne'er stand a big issue is there 5/6 guys to every girl. Another is alot are timewasters (Ive realised they don't come to forums).

But I've tried contacting nearly every girl and no luck and couples too. So there anything I'm missing. Like I'm not expecting a meet straight away and not saying want to screw etc. I like chatting and am genuine. I don't think I ugly but any other suggestions to help or is it the site just isn't for me?

Also I have photos in private simply because from my area there is a lot of timewasters on here I've seen and don't want to be exposed by them in like when I come here I want it to be private.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Take any negative stuff off ur profile like the bit about being messed around and left. Biggest help is to chose ur messages wisely and not blanket message every woman with in 10 miles. Wait until they are online before u message, put something different in ur headline other than hi. Sometimes it pays to be persistent when messaging but mention that u messaged before. Couldnt be arsed typing any more but thats a good start. Oh and never take the himp through rejection. And theres prob 100 blokes to every woman.lol. good luck

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Veris are important, they may not be the be all and end all but certainly help. So maybe get to a meet and great, chat to a few people and hopefully if they are verified, they will verify you.

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By *aid backMan  over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

we where all newbies once. swinging isn't a quick way to get a ride. its easier down your local. id stop messaging every woman and cpl and start joining in on the forums have some craic and the meets will happen.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If you were a woman would you write back to someone with your profile? Women get plenty of messages on here so you need to try and make yourself stand out from the crowd. Having a virtually empty profile isn't going to do that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just add to what Laidback said....the forums are a good place...the thing to remember though don't get too excited with ones on it...(yes get the banter and craic going stay positive, be decent and avoid negativity)....but it's the ones reading it and not contributing that will often message you privately often after reading your comments whom may be interested in you. Only about 2% actually engage in the forums so be aware there's a much bigger audience watching and listening. It'll will hapoen if you stay patient....happy fabbing.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's hard to stand out as a single male here. Carpet bombing women with messages doesn't work. You are one of many who will be doing that. As the other posters here have said, lots of people look at the forums. Don't force it. Quality over quantity.

Just be you, be patient, make friends. It's not a quick fix. It will take 6 months probably before people begin to trust you.

This isn't a dating site. It's a swingers site. Swinger friends can fuck each other.

Mr Arrow

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By *ean0001Man  over a year ago

Dublin West

If there was 5 or 6 guys to every girl it would be grand. Its probably 10 times that in reality.

I can only echo what others have said. You need to put in the effort to get the rewards. Your hardest veri will be your first.

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By *ommickMan  over a year ago

cork


"It's hard to stand out as a single male here. Carpet bombing women with messages doesn't work. You are one of many who will be doing that. As the other posters here have said, lots of people look at the forums. Don't force it. Quality over quantity.

Just be you, be patient, make friends. It's not a quick fix. It will take 6 months probably before people begin to trust you.

This isn't a dating site. It's a swingers site. Swinger friends can fuck each other.

Mr Arrow"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Take any negative stuff off ur profile like the bit about being messed around and left. Biggest help is to chose ur messages wisely and not blanket message every woman with in 10 miles. Wait until they are online before u message, put something different in ur headline other than hi. Sometimes it pays to be persistent when messaging but mention that u messaged before. Couldnt be arsed typing any more but thats a good start. Oh and never take the himp through rejection. And theres prob 100 blokes to every woman.lol. good luck "

This is very well thought out advice and don't do hi how's u as a 1st message it does our heads in lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Take any negative stuff off ur profile like the bit about being messed around and left. Biggest help is to chose ur messages wisely and not blanket message every woman with in 10 miles. Wait until they are online before u message, put something different in ur headline other than hi. Sometimes it pays to be persistent when messaging but mention that u messaged before. Couldnt be arsed typing any more but thats a good start. Oh and never take the himp through rejection. And theres prob 100 blokes to every woman.lol. good luck

This is very well thought out advice and don't do hi how's u as a 1st message it does our heads in lol"

Ive been here a long long time, so ive picked up abit.lol.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Leave it's not worth the shit here, it dose not matter how guinne you are were never going to meet the perfect standard for this self-centered place...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Cheers for tips. As I said I not carpet bombing or annoying girls it's more just struggling to be recognised

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By *ub_leitrim_guyMan  over a year ago

Out in the sticks


"Leave it's not worth the shit here, it dose not matter how guinne you are were never going to meet the perfect standard for this self-centered place..."

You are here 5 months!

Verified by 5 people

Newest 1 month ago

3 fem. 2 cpl. 4 meet.

so have a think about who is self -centered !!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Leave it's not worth the shit here, it dose not matter how guinne you are were never going to meet the perfect standard for this self-centered place..."
....of course fab is self centered. ..we joined to get what we want....didn't you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Leave it's not worth the shit here, it dose not matter how guinne you are were never going to meet the perfect standard for this self-centered place..."

And definitely don't do posts like this on the forum, because that's a sure fire turn off for anyone who might have an interest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Also I'm in Clare do I suffer as I not in Dublin area or does location matter. I do drive a lot so location isn't ever an issue even for coffee meets.

Like I admire ye guys as ye do seem to have it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee.

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By *ub_leitrim_guyMan  over a year ago

Out in the sticks


"Also I'm in Clare do I suffer as I not in Dublin area or does location matter. I do drive a lot so location isn't ever an issue even for coffee meets.

Like I admire ye guys as ye do seem to have it."

You'd think someone would organize a party in Limerick! Not a hope...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Leave it's not worth the shit here, it dose not matter how guinne you are were never going to meet the perfect standard for this self-centered place.......of course fab is self centered. ..we joined to get what we want....didn't you? "
and what is what ye want,

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. "
so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

OP no offence but your profile is bland and generic. You have one not-great photo and show absolutely no personality. Get a variety of pictures up there. Check our other guys' profiles for ideas for good pictures. As for the profile text, there's nothing that stands out whatsoever. Put some effort in, show some wit and originality. If your messages are in the same vein as your profile then it's no wonder you're not getting replies.

Spend some time checking out good male profiles and then work on your own.

Also of course location matters. There are over a million people in Dublin. Obviously there are going to be a lot more members here than in other parts of the country.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's.."
....no I think you are wrong there... I live miles from back end of beyond and have travelled long distance for just coffee and a chat.... sometimes it leads to more... sometimes not....

You only get out what you put in...and if you want to put it in , you have to go out

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's.."

Fuck u do some moaning. Its no wonder ur struggling. All this crap is not going to help either. If its so bad leave like uve been trying to do for the past week

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's......no I think you are wrong there... I live miles from back end of beyond and have travelled long distance for just coffee and a chat.... sometimes it leads to more... sometimes not....

You only get out what you put in...and if you want to put it in , you have to go out "

Im not saying that's the way it is, just that some women do feel that way and have expressed it. Of course there are women it won't bother either way and of course there are guys who will travel with no expectation. It does no harm to have it on his profile though.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's......no I think you are wrong there... I live miles from back end of beyond and have travelled long distance for just coffee and a chat.... sometimes it leads to more... sometimes not....

You only get out what you put in...and if you want to put it in , you have to go out

Im not saying that's the way it is, just that some women do feel that way and have expressed it. Of course there are women it won't bother either way and of course there are guys who will travel with no expectation. It does no harm to have it on his profile though. "

... absolutely... I was disagreeing with redfans post

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By *aid backMan  over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's.."

why are you so bitter jesus you have had meets there are guys out there with no meets in 5 months and you bitch and moan if fab has got to you this much in five months imagine what it will be like in a years time

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. so what are you ment to do stay in clare where notting happing get real not everyone lives in city's......no I think you are wrong there... I live miles from back end of beyond and have travelled long distance for just coffee and a chat.... sometimes it leads to more... sometimes not....

You only get out what you put in...and if you want to put it in , you have to go out

Im not saying that's the way it is, just that some women do feel that way and have expressed it. Of course there are women it won't bother either way and of course there are guys who will travel with no expectation. It does no harm to have it on his profile though. ... absolutely... I was disagreeing with redfans post "

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By *ale4U2Man  over a year ago

Nearby

Get a pair of grey trackies a size to small ... Bingo !!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Get a pair of grey trackies a size to small ... Bingo !!! "

Best.... Advice..... EVER!!!!!

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By *ale4U2Man  over a year ago

Nearby


"Get a pair of grey trackies a size to small ... Bingo !!!

Best.... Advice..... EVER!!!!!"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You should probably put that on your profile, as some women won't feel comfortable with a guy traveling a long way just for coffee. "

I travel alot and have had meets in all corners. Know what you are looking for and keep that standard. Sometimes you may have to wait a while but most often your meets will be repeats and those are usually the best. (IMO)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Looks like the two Clare men are gone off for a mmf with Biddy Early

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By *rivexMan  over a year ago

Newtown

So what have we Learned from a guy leaving after the wisdoms departed?

The Secret is:

Don't ask for advice, no one knows

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