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Humiliation not for me, your thoughts!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I just watched a few vids of an Irish couple on a certain site, I was disgusted really afterwards as the poor girl looked like she was off her head and it was the guy who just getting his kicks humiliating her on camera he was no Spielberg but just ended up looking like a scumbag

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Whatever 2 consenting adults enjoy is OK by me, as long as noone is physically harmed. Plenty of people don't understand swinging at all and woukd think it disgusting. Consent is the key.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I just watched a few vids of an Irish couple on a certain site, I was disgusted really afterwards as the poor girl looked like she was off her head and it was the guy who just getting his kicks humiliating her on camera he was no Spielberg but just ended up looking like a scumbag "

But did she make his tea in the end?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

i don't think she was fit to walk to the kitchen to even put the kettle on

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By *es deux lapinCouple  over a year ago

dublin

Yes I watch hours of videos everyday and I always feel disgusted too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Irish women in general seem to be very submissive to their men, we have observed. Not all but a large percentage.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Irish women in general seem to be very submissive to their men, we have observed. Not all but a large percentage. "

Really? Properly submissive or "we prefer a quiet life" so appear so?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hey..im very submissive but I choose who..and only with somebody I really trust..unfortunately whether it's bdsm..swinging..or vanilla..there are guys who will take advantage of females with issues n label it dom/sub to make it sound exciting and acceptable..it's good that bdsm has become more accepted sexual behaviour but it's also become "trendy" to call yourself dom or sub..it makes me laugh when I get messages from guys who have read 50 shades but never even looked at any websites..blogs or research regarding true bdsm..please no slating or digs..it's just my opinion

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Hey..im very submissive but I choose who..and only with somebody I really trust..unfortunately whether it's bdsm..swinging..or vanilla..there are guys who will take advantage of females with issues n label it dom/sub to make it sound exciting and acceptable..it's good that bdsm has become more accepted sexual behaviour but it's also become "trendy" to call yourself dom or sub..it makes me laugh when I get messages from guys who have read 50 shades but never even looked at any websites..blogs or research regarding true bdsm..please no slating or digs..it's just my opinion"

I couldn't have said it better fair play xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hey..im very submissive but I choose who..and only with somebody I really trust..unfortunately whether it's bdsm..swinging..or vanilla..there are guys who will take advantage of females with issues n label it dom/sub to make it sound exciting and acceptable..it's good that bdsm has become more accepted sexual behaviour but it's also become "trendy" to call yourself dom or sub..it makes me laugh when I get messages from guys who have read 50 shades but never even looked at any websites..blogs or research regarding true bdsm..please no slating or digs..it's just my opinion

I couldn't have said it better fair play xx "

Duke..I get stick for not meeting but what I'm into I wouldn't let a random online stranger do to me..need to build up trust..N know each others wants n limits. For eg..my ex bf/dom lived in another city..if we had plans I had to send him pictures of what I would be wearing for approval..some might say that's not equal...but i wanted him to be attracted to me..N he showed me his appreciation..wasn't just "you're not wearing that"... was more "u think you're the sexiest woman alive when you dress for me" .to me that's dom/sub..not not a mention of getting on my knees or humiliation

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By *oghunter33Woman  over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

I obviously haven't seen those clips, if it gives both a kick and it's ok for both sides, that's fine.

However if it's a onesided sick relationship with a dom male who tries to dominate a insecure weak female in every aspect of her life it's obviously wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hey..im very submissive but I choose who..and only with somebody I really trust..unfortunately whether it's bdsm..swinging..or vanilla..there are guys who will take advantage of females with issues n label it dom/sub to make it sound exciting and acceptable..it's good that bdsm has become more accepted sexual behaviour but it's also become "trendy" to call yourself dom or sub..it makes me laugh when I get messages from guys who have read 50 shades but never even looked at any websites..blogs or research regarding true bdsm..please no slating or digs..it's just my opinion"

this is so well put and so true. You are either a born dominant or you're not, and I guess the same goes for submissives.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hey..im very submissive but I choose who..and only with somebody I really trust..unfortunately whether it's bdsm..swinging..or vanilla..there are guys who will take advantage of females with issues n label it dom/sub to make it sound exciting and acceptable..it's good that bdsm has become more accepted sexual behaviour but it's also become "trendy" to call yourself dom or sub..it makes me laugh when I get messages from guys who have read 50 shades but never even looked at any websites..blogs or research regarding true bdsm..please no slating or digs..it's just my opinion

I couldn't have said it better fair play xx

Duke..I get stick for not meeting but what I'm into I wouldn't let a random online stranger do to me..need to build up trust..N know each others wants n limits. For eg..my ex bf/dom lived in another city..if we had plans I had to send him pictures of what I would be wearing for approval..some might say that's not equal...but i wanted him to be attracted to me..N he showed me his appreciation..wasn't just "you're not wearing that"... was more "u think you're the sexiest woman alive when you dress for me" .to me that's dom/sub..not not a mention of getting on my knees or humiliation "

*i think you're the sexiest

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hey..im very submissive but I choose who..and only with somebody I really trust..unfortunately whether it's bdsm..swinging..or vanilla..there are guys who will take advantage of females with issues n label it dom/sub to make it sound exciting and acceptable..it's good that bdsm has become more accepted sexual behaviour but it's also become "trendy" to call yourself dom or sub..it makes me laugh when I get messages from guys who have read 50 shades but never even looked at any websites..blogs or research regarding true bdsm..please no slating or digs..it's just my opinion

this is so well put and so true. You are either a born dominant or you're not, and I guess the same goes for submissives."

Im probably ranting here a bit but it's actually something I know a bit about..personally I agree..I think you're born sub/dom..just like being born gay...

Some can enjoy aspects of bdsm..but when I accepted what I am I became a lot more at peacr witg myself..N btw..I work in a high pressure professional job..im financially independent n very feisty..if I submit then you really are a dom and I respect you..a true dom will take care of a true sub because he adores her for her submission because he knows she chooses very carefully

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By *hocko87Man  over a year ago

dublin

Look dom n sub is a whole different ball game it takes a lot of trust if ur going to b a sub . I've talked to female subs n they enjoy being a sub. But only to a certain person not to every one . IDE luv to try being a sub to a lady . Trust is a very big part of it . Unlike as they say vanilla sex all u need is chemistery .

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By *ocko123Man  over a year ago

Derry

As said, Consent the key! A matter of taste and agreed parameters.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Many people who are natural subs will crave being humiliated. The role of the Dom is to give a safe environment to allow both parties to explore this side of their nature's.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As said, Consent the key! A matter of taste and agreed parameters."

Get what your saying..but I've a small issue here..if the person labelled as sub is really agreeing because they have mental health issues n not because they get any gratification sexual or any other way..is that OK? We all know a well known case this year where a female allowed herself to be used as a sub to satisfy a guys supposed dom wants..N we all know how it ended..as a sub..I believe you have to be quite strong minded..N know exactly what you're doing..

When I'm in the middle of a scenario with my master it would be very clear to an outside observer that I'm getting off on it..not a dom has to have enough knowledge of the sub to know where her limits are..can you get that with a stranger?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The whole point is that the boundaries and limits are determined by the sub.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I tend to agree with a lot of what is said here. If we are stereotyping in general women do tend to be more sexually submissive and males sexually dominant and that is how society has portrayed it for many years. Consent is key as the others have said. I know that while I have done humiliations scenes with submissives that it's not something that comes easy to me but more so something that I know they really enjoy and need. I watch femdom videos and I enjoy them. And in general they have a definitive humiliation aspect to them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Many people who are natural subs will crave being humiliated. The role of the Dom is to give a safe environment to allow both parties to explore this side of their nature's. "

Agree here..im not actually against humiliation. It's not for me...but to me the doms responsibility is to know when enough is enough..even before the sub knows

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The whole point is that the boundaries and limits are determined by the sub. "

Exactly

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The whole point is that the boundaries and limits are determined by the sub. "

.. and the Dom too. Just because you're dominant doesn't mean you would be willing to do ANYTHING the sub wants. Mutual respect for limits is necessary.

A good Dom will know their own limits.

Both parties need to be able to come away with self respect intact afterwards.

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By *ocko123Man  over a year ago

Derry

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By *j47Man  over a year ago

limerick

one of the best and informative threads on this exploration of sub/dom relationships I have seen on this forum.

as sub will always have control but a good dom will know the boundaries of his sub when to push a little when to hold and as said gratification for both parties is the endgame

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"one of the best and informative threads on this exploration of sub/dom relationships I have seen on this forum.

as sub will always have control but a good dom will know the boundaries of his sub when to push a little when to hold and as said gratification for both parties is the endgame "

Awww thanks cj..I kinda went on a rant..but glad you got something from it..N for the record..i think a lot of the confusion cones from confusing submissive for subservient and dominant for domineering..but when it's all good...it's really good ...mmmm

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sub/dom is very misunderstood by many on here. A true sub/dom is very much a relationship of sorts. It needs a lot of trust but most importantly TIME... It takes time to bring a sub or dom for that matter to a level of understanding for their partner so both may get maximum pleasure from their meetings.

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