FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Let down gently.
Let down gently.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So you've been chatting to someone for a couple of days. Email ping-pong, the usual. Hitting it off, you think this could work. Sexually compatible etc.
A meeting is suggested, it's your favourite (€€€ - tripadvisor style) restaurant. Christ, you think 'he's good'.
You ask for a photo, just to seal it all in your own mind.
Then, bam, not attracted to him. Never will be. As much as I'd like to say personality can do it all, I'm too shallow for that, apparently
How do you let him down?
Thanks Fabbers.
DB.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's so easy to tell you to just tell him he's not your type.....but I know I can't do that myself. It just feels horrible after you've been chatting for so long to do that to someone, as much as you may like them!
Unless you just suggest your meet is only social and stress that! |
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Sometimes its best to be honest. Just tell him that although we have hit it off with the messaging but don't think your my type but will still be friends and meet for coffee and or talk on here if he wants. Then it is his choice  |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends  |
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"Sometimes its best to be honest. Just tell him that although we have hit it off with the messaging but don't think your my type but will still be friends and meet for coffee and or talk on here if he wants. Then it is his choice "
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"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends "
yes and you could also discover that his pic is shit and dose him no justice. |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends yes and you could also discover that his pic is shit and dose him no justice."
This is true in a lot of cases some people just don't suit the camera me included. Say it straight u have nothing to loose and everything to gain |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A guy once messaged me back saying 'nah, not feeling it'....horrible..I'd prefer the 'you're lovely but not my type' x"
I prefer if nothing was said to me at all, I get the message they're not interested when they don't reply back after sending a photo! I just move on, it's his loss after all!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes its best to be honest. Just tell him that although we have hit it off with the messaging but don't think your my type but will still be friends and meet for coffee and or talk on here if he wants. Then it is his choice
"
Good advice,he ll be hurt either way but best to do it sooner rather than later. |
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"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends yes and you could also discover that his pic is shit and dose him no justice.
This is true in a lot of cases some people just don't suit the camera me included. Say it straight u have nothing to loose and everything to gain "
Hate my photo and would agree with this 100% |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends "
I wouldn't encourage him by agreeing to meet him for just coffee! That only makes him think he's still in with a chance! |
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"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends
I wouldn't encourage him by agreeing to meet him for just coffee! That only makes him think he's still in with a chance!"
Not at all......have met a few for just coffee and they knew it wasn't going any further. Still talk on here as well. |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends
I wouldn't encourage him by agreeing to meet him for just coffee! That only makes him think he's still in with a chance!"
I see what u mean but at the end of the day he has managed to gain her interest up to this I hate pics first msg I'd much prefer to meet in a public place and judge for my self. Make it clear its coffee and a chat if there is any playing it will be at a later date, quiet easy to say as u part I don't think this is going any further |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Grow a set and tell the truth tell him the pic really did nothing for u but u still like to meet him socially to be sure its a swingers site not love actualy. U may even find u enjoy each others company and become friends
I wouldn't encourage him by agreeing to meet him for just coffee! That only makes him think he's still in with a chance!
I see what u mean but at the end of the day he has managed to gain her interest up to this I hate pics first msg I'd much prefer to meet in a public place and judge for my self. Make it clear its coffee and a chat if there is any playing it will be at a later date, quiet easy to say as u part I don't think this is going any further "
Good point there so long as he accepts that in good faith! |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
I have met peeps for a social coffee with the full knowledge its a coffee and ended up with some of the best sex, others either one or the other decided no its not going any further we still chat and have a laugh |
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"I have met peeps for a social coffee with the full knowledge its a coffee and ended up with some of the best sex, others either one or the other decided no its not going any further we still chat and have a laugh"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Won't he see this and now know??
No, he's from another site.
That would have been pretty cruel! "
Sorry never thought about that.Yes that would have been thee worst.Good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have met peeps for a social coffee with the full knowledge its a coffee and ended up with some of the best sex, others either one or the other decided no its not going any further we still chat and have a laugh"
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
Seriously Db I was in chat there was a guy on cam that a female pm me about to look at his pics he's a god on cam he's ordinary bite the bullet go for it u never know
Yes I had a perve damn hot to trot u are mmmmmm |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely its not about letting people down gently or harshly as much as its about having a good time and enjoying the moment. Noone has a right to sex just cause you agree to meet up. I met my best friend on here and she told me i wasn't her type when i sent my face pic. I figured fair enough but we kept chatting as we enjoyed the craic and finally met for a walk. I think its fair enough to say that if we hadn't met for that walk both our lives would have been missing something but neither of us met for that walk with a preconceived notion that we would have sex. That was over 2 and half years ago!!! |
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I meet lot's of people for coffee and they have never had a problem with that being all that's on offer tbh and usually with out a face pic too! As I hate getting my face pic taken .on occasion it has led to more at another time but more often it doesn't for a number of reasons , lack of opportunity being one lol. .... and that's ok! But I still chat to many of them and have become friends. We are all adults and have the ability to behave like adults ... Those that don't ... Aren't going to get far tbh. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dirty...
Many times I have Ooogled over face pics,and thought wow gorgeous only to meet in person and feel NOTHING..
Then a face pic I'd just ignore or not be impressed with only to be all over them in person..
It's all about chemistry...
I'd say meet for a drink lunch or just a cupa you may be surprised |
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"Surely its not about letting people down gently or harshly as much as its about having a good time and enjoying the moment. Noone has a right to sex just cause you agree to meet up. I met my best friend on here and she told me i wasn't her type when i sent my face pic. I figured fair enough but we kept chatting as we enjoyed the craic and finally met for a walk. I think its fair enough to say that if we hadn't met for that walk both our lives would have been missing something but neither of us met for that walk with a preconceived notion that we would have sex. That was over 2 and half years ago!!! "
So did you have sex? I'm dying to know  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely its not about letting people down gently or harshly as much as its about having a good time and enjoying the moment. Noone has a right to sex just cause you agree to meet up. I met my best friend on here and she told me i wasn't her type when i sent my face pic. I figured fair enough but we kept chatting as we enjoyed the craic and finally met for a walk. I think its fair enough to say that if we hadn't met for that walk both our lives would have been missing something but neither of us met for that walk with a preconceived notion that we would have sex. That was over 2 and half years ago!!!
So did you have sex? I'm dying to know "
Jog on you  |
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"Surely its not about letting people down gently or harshly as much as its about having a good time and enjoying the moment. Noone has a right to sex just cause you agree to meet up. I met my best friend on here and she told me i wasn't her type when i sent my face pic. I figured fair enough but we kept chatting as we enjoyed the craic and finally met for a walk. I think its fair enough to say that if we hadn't met for that walk both our lives would have been missing something but neither of us met for that walk with a preconceived notion that we would have sex. That was over 2 and half years ago!!!
So did you have sex? I'm dying to know
Jog on you "
Hah, I bet you're wondering as well? |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Surely its not about letting people down gently or harshly as much as its about having a good time and enjoying the moment. Noone has a right to sex just cause you agree to meet up. I met my best friend on here and she told me i wasn't her type when i sent my face pic. I figured fair enough but we kept chatting as we enjoyed the craic and finally met for a walk. I think its fair enough to say that if we hadn't met for that walk both our lives would have been missing something but neither of us met for that walk with a preconceived notion that we would have sex. That was over 2 and half years ago!!!
So did you have sex? I'm dying to know "
Same here mick but it sounded so rosemantic I didn't want to ruin the moment since u did hell go tell us was it against a tree |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely its not about letting people down gently or harshly as much as its about having a good time and enjoying the moment. Noone has a right to sex just cause you agree to meet up. I met my best friend on here and she told me i wasn't her type when i sent my face pic. I figured fair enough but we kept chatting as we enjoyed the craic and finally met for a walk. I think its fair enough to say that if we hadn't met for that walk both our lives would have been missing something but neither of us met for that walk with a preconceived notion that we would have sex. That was over 2 and half years ago!!!
So did you have sex? I'm dying to know
Same here mick but it sounded so rosemantic I didn't want to ruin the moment since u did hell go tell us was it against a tree "
Its Lacey here.
No we didn't have sex against a tree.....well not the first time anyway lol. We ended in a hotel room a few weeks later and, after experiencing the hottest kissing ever in the lift, we had the most amazing sex I have ever had. The chemistry was electric and it still is....
So don't base everything on a face pic as I have found my best friend who provides the most amazing benefits....(it was a shite pic though  sorry Shercock) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mick and Cj...A walk in the park
Ohh Annie u duirty thing the two of us will u be able for us
God no...
We will be gentle
To start with anyway  "
Gentle????
Thought you knew me?  |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"Mick and Cj...A walk in the park
Ohh Annie u duirty thing the two of us will u be able for us
God no...
We will be gentle
To start with anyway
Gentle????
Thought you knew me? "
I do thats the problem a wolf in sheep's clothing haha |
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