FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > married love swinging but partner is not
married love swinging but partner is not
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Whats the groups feelings on this. Im married and love the whole swinging thing but my wife hates it. I have decided to go it alone and hopefully meet some amazing people. |
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By *aid backMan
over a year ago
by a lake with my rod out |
"Whats the groups feelings on this. Im married and love the whole swinging thing but my wife hates it. I have decided to go it alone and hopefully meet some amazing people. "
first of all id hide ur face pic esp if your wife isnt into swinging you dont know you may know you and her |
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"Whats the groups feelings on this. Im married and love the whole swinging thing but my wife hates it. I have decided to go it alone and hopefully meet some amazing people. "
Depends if she knows and is happy for you to "go it alone ". If so, good luck.
If you intend to do it behind her back , think long and hard. Marriages are based on compromise, not discussing an issue and then doing your own thing if you don't get your desired outcome. |
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I'm sure you will get meets but we definitely will not meet married men alone even if their partner is ok with it. It just goes against what we believe swinging is and if your wife doesn't know , that we feel is highly disrespectful towards her and your marriage.
Best of luck whatever you chose to do |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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First she knows but did say will see how she feels after my first meet as to if she continues to agree so I will respect that. I was just curious as to how married guys on own are accepted. Thanks for replys |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
Coming from a similar perspective as yourself communication is vitial discuss what draws u to swinging and what reservations she has. Show her the site browse others experiences in stories and fantasy chat to other newbie and experienced cpls even go to a M&G with her where she can see other cpls enjoying a social no pressure night out. But most of all coumunicate
Happy swinging |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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think carefully wat will be lost .........NO going back once u step out.......best of luck with your decision but think of who else may be affected by it |
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By *razy-CplCouple
over a year ago
Cork and surrounding areas |
"Coming from a similar perspective as yourself communication is vitial discuss what draws u to swinging and what reservations she has. Show her the site browse others experiences in stories and fantasy chat to other newbie and experienced cpls even go to a M&G with her where she can see other cpls enjoying a social no pressure night out. But most of all coumunicate
Happy swinging"
 cj has it in a nut shell
mrs crazy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Coming from a similar perspective as yourself communication is vitial discuss what draws u to swinging and what reservations she has. Show her the site browse others experiences in stories and fantasy chat to other newbie and experienced cpls even go to a M&G with her where she can see other cpls enjoying a social no pressure night out. But most of all coumunicate
Happy swinging"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Coming from a similar perspective as yourself communication is vitial discuss what draws u to swinging and what reservations she has. Show her the site browse others experiences in stories and fantasy chat to other newbie and experienced cpls even go to a M&G with her where she can see other cpls enjoying a social no pressure night out. But most of all coumunicate
Happy swinging"
Cj you are such a wise old git lol, only kidding very good advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would personally use a slightly different approach! Don't try to force her instead give up swinging for her and dont be so interested, she might change her mind then! Bring it up in a way that might seem like her idea while you being intimate, fantasise about sexual encounters but not what you like but what she would enjoy instead, if you want to swing you gotta be open to the idea of her being with as many men or women as she want to fulfill her sexual desires, not your own selfishness to see how many holes you can stick your tally wacker in! You might have more success that way... Also tell her you love her and make her feel desirable and wanted every day so she doesn't feel you want to replace her instead of exploring with you... Women are funny creatures at time if you want something too much they won't give it to you for the simple fact you want it too much! Good luck  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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VroomVroom thats almost Inception material right there
Problem is, I am pretty sure it has been said in a couple of recent rom-com movies, and falling for that "nah, I am not really interested" would be a sign that I would be pretty alarmed about... Why? Cause it can mean a couple of things, and in my book none of them is pretty. |
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By *imwildWoman
over a year ago
around |
"Vroom you are so insightful to the way a woman thinks!!! 
Is this the same guy that had all the women up in arms last week ?,he's def not as dumb as he looks.Excellent advice Vroom "
Up in arms over what? Mustn't have been all of us!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would personally use a slightly different approach! Don't try to force her instead give up swinging for her and dont be so interested, she might change her mind then! Bring it up in a way that might seem like her idea while you being intimate, fantasise about sexual encounters but not what you like but what she would enjoy instead, if you want to swing you gotta be open to the idea of her being with as many men or women as she want to fulfill her sexual desires, not your own selfishness to see how many holes you can stick your tally wacker in! You might have more success that way... Also tell her you love her and make her feel desirable and wanted every day so she doesn't feel you want to replace her instead of exploring with you... Women are funny creatures at time if you want something too much they won't give it to you for the simple fact you want it too much! Good luck "
vroom vroom his wife HATES it.
What are you saying he needs to be open to the idea of her being with lots of men lol she doesn't want it sure. .. or is this a beginners guide to swinging  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Vroom you are so insightful to the way a woman thinks!!!
Is this the same guy that had all the women up in arms last week ?,he's def not as dumb as he looks.Excellent advice Vroom "
You do realise he is using the same woman psychology trip on ye guys?
First criticize the woman, make her feel worthless, and then ease up your spiel, and the woman comes flying in, eager to please and appease... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"VroomVroom thats almost Inception material right there
Problem is, I am pretty sure it has been said in a couple of recent rom-com movies, and falling for that "nah, I am not really interested" would be a sign that I would be pretty alarmed about... Why? Cause it can mean a couple of things, and in my book none of them is pretty."
What are you on about lol?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would personally use a slightly different approach! Don't try to force her instead give up swinging for her and dont be so interested, she might change her mind then! Bring it up in a way that might seem like her idea while you being intimate, fantasise about sexual encounters but not what you like but what she would enjoy instead, if you want to swing you gotta be open to the idea of her being with as many men or women as she want to fulfill her sexual desires, not your own selfishness to see how many holes you can stick your tally wacker in! You might have more success that way... Also tell her you love her and make her feel desirable and wanted every day so she doesn't feel you want to replace her instead of exploring with you... Women are funny creatures at time if you want something too much they won't give it to you for the simple fact you want it too much! Good luck "
Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Vroom you are so insightful to the way a woman thinks!!!
Is this the same guy that had all the women up in arms last week ?,he's def not as dumb as he looks.Excellent advice Vroom
Up in arms over what? Mustn't have been all of us!!"
Oh I wasn't one of them and can't remember the thread now but he def caused a bit of debate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Vroom you are so insightful to the way a woman thinks!!!
Is this the same guy that had all the women up in arms last week ?,he's def not as dumb as he looks.Excellent advice Vroom
You do realise he is using the same woman psychology trip on ye guys?
First criticize the woman, make her feel worthless, and then ease up your spiel, and the woman comes flying in, eager to please and appease... "
Shhh please be quiet don't be giving my tricks away Omg what am I gonna do now that I got exposed ohhhhhhhh noon! Well done m8 genius  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would personally use a slightly different approach! Don't try to force her instead give up swinging for her and dont be so interested, she might change her mind then! Bring it up in a way that might seem like her idea while you being intimate, fantasise about sexual encounters but not what you like but what she would enjoy instead, if you want to swing you gotta be open to the idea of her being with as many men or women as she want to fulfill her sexual desires, not your own selfishness to see how many holes you can stick your tally wacker in! You might have more success that way... Also tell her you love her and make her feel desirable and wanted every day so she doesn't feel you want to replace her instead of exploring with you... Women are funny creatures at time if you want something too much they won't give it to you for the simple fact you want it too much! Good luck
Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
"
My dear is not reverse "psychology" beside you know the same as me in term of this case so it's a big assumption to make that this approach won't work... So if the man wants to involve his wife and want advice I'm sure it's worth at least a try from a genuine non manipulating approach |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
"
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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DTG hate and love are on the same plane of emotions! The very homophobic man that really hates gays it's the one that would love to come out of the closet and become Cher  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so "
So why write a long message full of crap??
Too much time on your hands??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so "
I don't understand your statement Vroom. Care to explain? Maybe I'm just too dumb. (wink wink nudge nude, lol, pmsl etc)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"DTG hate and love are on the same plane of emotions! The very homophobic man that really hates gays it's the one that would love to come out of the closet and become Cher "
Kinda like how BOILING & COLD are similar? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
So why write a long message full of crap??
Too much time on your hands???"
You need to go get laid woman, I detect too much stress in your tone! Crap= your point of view I respect that! Too much time we'll that's my busy isn't it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
I don't understand your statement Vroom. Care to explain? Maybe I'm just too dumb. (wink wink nudge nude, lol, pmsl etc) "
Meaning we only know what he told us while I'm pretty sure there are way more elements involved in their life that what meet the eye... So I dont intend to know everything about their life or intentions but he asked for advice, so advice he was given I'm sure he can decide what is best for him and his wife |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
So why write a long message full of crap??
Too much time on your hands???
You need to go get laid woman, I detect too much stress in your tone! Crap= your point of view I respect that! Too much time we'll that's my busy isn't it? "
Lol I don't do stress and certainly not here.
Respect..... are you sure you know the meaning
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"DTG hate and love are on the same plane of emotions! The very homophobic man that really hates gays it's the one that would love to come out of the closet and become Cher
Kinda like how BOILING & COLD are similar? "
Depends which way you want to look at it but yes! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
I don't understand your statement Vroom. Care to explain? Maybe I'm just too dumb. (wink wink nudge nude, lol, pmsl etc)
Meaning we only know what he told us while I'm pretty sure there are way more elements involved in their life that what meet the eye... So I dont intend to know everything about their life or intentions but he asked for advice, so advice he was given I'm sure he can decide what is best for him and his wife "
Me either I can just about understand my own goings on without trying to work out anyone elses. There's always more going on in these things that we don't know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
So why write a long message full of crap??
Too much time on your hands???
You need to go get laid woman, I detect too much stress in your tone! Crap= your point of view I respect that! Too much time we'll that's my busy isn't it?
Lol I don't do stress and certainly not here.
Respect..... are you sure you know the meaning
"
Well you seem to be the one instigating! So maybe you don't know the meaning, advice was given you don't agree give your own don't criticise mine! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
I don't understand your statement Vroom. Care to explain? Maybe I'm just too dumb. (wink wink nudge nude, lol, pmsl etc)
Meaning we only know what he told us while I'm pretty sure there are way more elements involved in their life that what meet the eye... So I dont intend to know everything about their life or intentions but he asked for advice, so advice he was given I'm sure he can decide what is best for him and his wife
Me either I can just about understand my own goings on without trying to work out anyone elses. There's always more going on in these things that we don't know. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"***Gets the Popcorn **** ***Gets Vroom a shovel***
*** and buries him with it ***"
Please I love popcorn, maybe I can eat my way out..... Ohhhhh nooooo zombie zombie |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well "young" man you have a lot to learn about women!!
I can't see reverse physcology working on this occasion.
Another we know very little about this case to make such a big assumption it's nearly dumb to do so
So why write a long message full of crap??
Too much time on your hands???
You need to go get laid woman, I detect too much stress in your tone! Crap= your point of view I respect that! Too much time we'll that's my busy isn't it?
Lol I don't do stress and certainly not here.
Respect..... are you sure you know the meaning
Well you seem to be the one instigating! So maybe you don't know the meaning, advice was given you don't agree give your own don't criticise mine! "
Why not? If you are going to give "advice" on an open forum, you are leaving yourself wide open to be criticised.
Like you said we don't know all the facts so it be wrong for me to give advice, and I certainly wouldn't give advice like yours to anyone. Hopefully the Op is more respectful to his wife than thinking " let it be her idea" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe the OP should think about the ramifications of 'the first meet'. If she's not fine with it afterwards, she could see it as 'leaving you' material. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe the OP should think about the ramifications of 'the first meet'. If she's not fine with it afterwards, she could see it as 'leaving you' material. "
100% agree to that! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Popcorn is all gone
As is Brum brum's antagony."
I don't get you Candy..
However. .. on the lyrics thread you put up Please please please let me let me let me lyrics. .. have you heard clayhills version? ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Popcorn is all gone
As is Brum brum's antagony.
I don't get you Candy..
However. .. on the lyrics thread you put up Please please please let me let me let me lyrics. .. have you heard clayhills version? ?? "
I have now, I lasted 42 seconds...
It reminded me of the Trumpton theme at the start. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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'm sure it's worth at least a try from a genuine non manipulating approach
That's the contradiction of the day
Vroom your suggesting he plays a game in a bid trick his wife into thinking it's for her gratification ! When it's really for him
I think that's called MANIPULATION
The OP should also considering putting his face picture on private .. As respect for his wife's position ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Popcorn is all gone
As is Brum brum's antagony.
I don't get you Candy..
However. .. on the lyrics thread you put up Please please please let me let me let me lyrics. .. have you heard clayhills version? ??
I have now, I lasted 42 seconds...
It reminded me of the Trumpton theme at the start."
I heard the clay hill one in "This is england" (highly recommend that movie/tv series) anyway I heard the cover before I heard the original. .. prefer the cover |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Popcorn is all gone
As is Brum brum's antagony.
I don't get you Candy..
However. .. on the lyrics thread you put up Please please please let me let me let me lyrics. .. have you heard clayhills version? ??
I have now, I lasted 42 seconds...
It reminded me of the Trumpton theme at the start.
I heard the clay hill one in "This is england" (highly recommend that movie/tv series) anyway I heard the cover before I heard the original. .. prefer the cover"
*points finger 'Blasphemer!'
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"^^^^^ my bad ^^^^^
who sings original?
The Smiths, now I know you hate links but,
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yRYpd3_roHg"
The bother of that!! I do appreciate it though x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"'m sure it's worth at least a try from a genuine non manipulating approach
That's the contradiction of the day
Vroom your suggesting he plays a game in a bid trick his wife into thinking it's for her gratification ! When it's really for him
I think that's called MANIPULATION
The OP should also considering putting his
face picture on private .. As respect for his
wife's position ! "
I put face pick up to that at im not cheating |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"'m sure it's worth at least a try from a genuine non manipulating approach
That's the contradiction of the day
Vroom your suggesting he plays a game in a bid trick his wife into thinking it's for her gratification ! When it's really for him
I think that's called MANIPULATION
The OP should also considering putting his
face picture on private .. As respect for his
wife's position !
I put face pick up to that at im not cheating "
not worried that someone on here will know you and your wife then, maybe your wife doesn't want the fact her husband swings without her broadcast? just a thought |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"'m sure it's worth at least a try from a genuine non manipulating approach
That's the contradiction of the day
Vroom your suggesting he plays a game in a bid trick his wife into thinking it's for her gratification ! When it's really for him
I think that's called MANIPULATION
The OP should also considering putting his
face picture on private .. As respect for his
wife's position !
I put face pick up to that at im not cheating "
The fact you have a profile that she is aware of is sufficient to show you are 'not cheating'
What about the wider implications of having a very distinctive face & body avatar public to the World Wide Web |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I have to say for a site where freedom to express your sexual prefrence or desires is generally accepted in the swinging world some people are very judgemental. I think the need to look up swinging in reference to the content of this site |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have to say for a site where freedom to express your sexual prefrence or desires is generally accepted in the swinging world some people are very judgemental. I think the need to look up swinging in reference to the content of this site "
We're basically just saying that you're a single male profile. .. deal w/it
Your wife hates the thought therefore you won't be a couples profile. .. we are open here you asked for advice and you got LOTS |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"DTG hate and love are on the same plane of emotions! The very homophobic man that really hates gays it's the one that would love to come out of the closet and become Cher
Kinda like how BOILING & COLD are similar?
Depends which way you want to look at it but yes! "
Ok so close your eyes. I'm going to pour either "boiling" or "cold" water over you (no not in any kinky way!) but it won't matter which, will it? Cause they're both similar right? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have to say for a site where freedom to express your sexual prefrence or desires is generally accepted in the swinging world some people are very judgemental. I think the need to look up swinging in reference to the content of this site "
As for you, the only person you should be asking is your wife. You can take on board vroom's advice from his male perspective and it might work to some degree but she'll eventually see through it. Over time she might change her mind yes but not if you go on ahead without her and do your own thing. Surely it's best to explore together even if that means you waiting for a while.
As for swinging it means a whole host of things to individuals here, you can't say that someone's view of it is wrong because it's different to your interpretation, otherwise you are being judgemental too!
I think you came here looking support to justify going solo but in actual fact by even mentioning that your wife hates the idea, you already knew what the response would be. Even in a community of open minded people.
Sometimes the term 'open minded' is confused with lacking in morals. or grey areas of what's right and wrong, when there's a former commitment (like marriage) already existing. I'm not saying that makes me a saint, I just don't lie to myself about what is right or wrong. Those are the consequences we all face when we make informed choices. I believe your situation is a decision based on an informed choice.
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"DTG hate and love are on the same plane of emotions! The very homophobic man that really hates gays it's the one that would love to come out of the closet and become Cher
Kinda like how BOILING & COLD are similar?
Depends which way you want to look at it but yes!
Ok so close your eyes. I'm going to pour either "boiling" or "cold" water over you (no not in any kinky way!) but it won't matter which, will it? Cause they're both similar right? "
That reminds me of the story of the cop who stopped a car that drove through a stop sign. The driver said there was nothing coming and sure wasn't slowing down the same as stopping anyway. The cop asked him to get out of the car and proceeded to beat seven shades of shite out of him with his baton. When he was lying on the ground in a heap the cop said.. "Now, would you like me to stop or just slow down?" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"DTG hate and love are on the same plane of emotions! The very homophobic man that really hates gays it's the one that would love to come out of the closet and become Cher
Kinda like how BOILING & COLD are similar?
Depends which way you want to look at it but yes!
Ok so close your eyes. I'm going to pour either "boiling" or "cold" water over you (no not in any kinky way!) but it won't matter which, will it? Cause they're both similar right?
That reminds me of the story of the cop who stopped a car that drove through a stop sign. The driver said there was nothing coming and sure wasn't slowing down the same as stopping anyway. The cop asked him to get out of the car and proceeded to beat seven shades of shite out of him with his baton. When he was lying on the ground in a heap the cop said.. "Now, would you like me to stop or just slow down?" "
Lol my dad used to tell us that when we misbehaved!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have to say for a site where freedom to express your sexual prefrence or desires is generally accepted in the swinging world some people are very judgemental. I think the need to look up swinging in reference to the content of this site "
ah jeez, ya know yer right, musta been doing it wrong all these years, obviously you have it sorted and therefore just wanted people to tell you what you are doing is wonderful, spot on and a real achievement, carry on! |
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