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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Just read a story on the BBC news about a guy in Scotland who's been convicted of having sex with his bicycle. I kid you not.
The gist of the story is - cleaners knocked on door, no response so opened it with master key. Dude is wearing nothing but a white t-shirt (why colour was important remains a mystery?) and thrusting his thing at his bike.... Cleaners tell manager, manager ring the peelers, guys ends up with a 3 year probation order and has to sign sex offenders register.
Now I'm wondering what I'm missing here? The dude was in the privacy of his room with the door locked - what law/s has he broken? What's next? Housewives up and down the country doing time for cruelty to cucumbers!??
 Should I get written consent from my electric toothbrush if I'm outta batteries for my vibe? 
And will there be a task force set up to eradicate indecent photos of sky remotes?? 
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No way...that is hilarious"
Must be more to it?
The cop actually said this: "In almost four decades in the law I thought I had come across every perversion known to mankind, but this is a new one on me. I have never heard of a 'cycle-sexualist'."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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that story is years old , not sure what paper is reporting it now , but there was a case in the u k where the guy was convicted and put on the sex offenders register for having sex with his bicycle , apparently the hotel maid walked in on him and made a complaint that had seen him assaulting the bicycle . the charge was brought forward because the hotel maid said she was subjected to the spectacle . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just read a story on the BBC news about a guy in Scotland who's been convicted of having sex with his bicycle. I kid you not.
The gist of the story is - cleaners knocked on door, no response so opened it with master key. Dude is wearing nothing but a white t-shirt (why colour was important remains a mystery?) and thrusting his thing at his bike.... Cleaners tell manager, manager ring the peelers, guys ends up with a 3 year probation order and has to sign sex offenders register.
Now I'm wondering what I'm missing here? The dude was in the privacy of his room with the door locked - what law/s has he broken? What's next? Housewives up and down the country doing time for cruelty to cucumbers!??
Should I get written consent from my electric toothbrush if I'm outta batteries for my vibe?
And will there be a task force set up to eradicate indecent photos of sky remotes??
"
clearly the guy has severe"cycle sexual tendencies"
N needs counseling 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Always have to watch the Scottish
"No way...that is hilarious
Must be more to it?
The cop actually said this: "In almost four decades in the law I thought I had come across every perversion known to mankind, but this is a new one on me. I have never heard of a 'cycle-sexualist'."
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"that story is years old , not sure what paper is reporting it now , but there was a case in the u k where the guy was convicted and put on the sex offenders register for having sex with his bicycle , apparently the hotel maid walked in on him and made a complaint that had seen him assaulting the bicycle . the charge was brought forward because the hotel maid said she was subjected to the spectacle . "
It was an old article, I just stumbled across it somewhere. It just seemed like he wasn't intending to be an exhibitionist? So if my window cleaner caught me having a solo session would he have a case?
Apart from that - the maid needs to catch herself on. Some people have no sense of humour! |
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