FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > friends or family finding out :)
friends or family finding out :)
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By *nandtn OP Couple
over a year ago
Leeds |
just curious to hear stories of any one telling there friends or family about there secret swingers life style and there reactions or has any one been caught by friends or family in there swinger life styles etc etc etc we look forward to hearing any stories  |
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"just curious to hear stories of any one telling there friends or family about there secret swingers life style and there reactions or has any one been caught by friends or family in there swinger life styles etc etc etc we look forward to hearing any stories "
I know a few over years who have been found
out so to speak. Even some who have been exposed so to speak by media press. Many think they have nothing to lose. The reality from what I've seen is quite different. People get ridiculed ostracised and same goes for their kids and those close to them. I have known people in so called sensitive jobs being let go in subtle ways. My advice is before you adopt the I have nothing to lose and we all here same reasons attitude or everyone would love to be doing this kind of thinking consider public perception of what we do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We actually just recently made contact with a couple who'll remain nameless by the way, for the purpose of this comment.
After a few messages back and forward and a pic swap, it turned out we knew the male half over ten years!!! He had been to our wedding also. Awkward or what
We are still friends and all that goes on is totally private.
And we both have a trusted friend or two that know.
As for family, we pay for that day NEVER to come. No pun intended!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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All my friends know, these are people i trust, my brother knows too cos he is very open minded, my sister definitely not and nor does my dad obviously, i don't wanna lose my job over it so i am careful but when i am out with friends we chat about it, they are nosey though lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Two of my sister's know and my friend as she use to swing herself. As long as I'm careful and protect myself and not making my child an orphan they are fine. I think it's good for men and women to have someone they trust to tell where there going in this lifestyle |
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I told my cousin- who i though was very close to me. He bit on the wild side himself but i would have never expected this reaction from him.
He completely blocked us off. When he did bump into his he says he was completely embarrassed.
He recommended that maybe we should do a marraige course.
So bad call on my part telling him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I told my cousin- who i though was very close to me. He bit on the wild side himself but i would have never expected this reaction from him.
He completely blocked us off. When he did bump into his he says he was completely embarrassed.
He recommended that maybe we should do a marraige course.
So bad call on my part telling him."
Same here...told my best friend
She's very open minded a married woman who i saved more than once by telling her husband she was at ours when she wasn't.....ie with a guy
The look and attitude she gave me was of pure horror!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just curious to hear stories of any one telling there friends or family about there secret swingers life style and there reactions or has any one been caught by friends or family in there swinger life styles etc etc etc we look forward to hearing any stories
I know a few over years who have been found
out so to speak. Even some who have been exposed so to speak by media press. Many think they have nothing to lose. The reality from what I've seen is quite different. People get ridiculed ostracised and same goes for their kids and those close to them. I have known people in so called sensitive jobs being let go in subtle ways. My advice is before you adopt the I have nothing to lose and we all here same reasons attitude or everyone would love to be doing this kind of thinking consider public perception of what we do."
God yeah!!! Couldn't agree more!!! Well said!!!! |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"I told my cousin- who i though was very close to me. He bit on the wild side himself but i would have never expected this reaction from him.
He completely blocked us off. When he did bump into his he says he was completely embarrassed.
He recommended that maybe we should do a marraige course.
So bad call on my part telling him.
Same here...told my best friend
She's very open minded a married woman who i saved more than once by telling her husband she was at ours when she wasn't.....ie with a guy
The look and attitude she gave me was of pure horror!! "
i think u don't really know ur friends untill u tell them something like this i keep it close to me my wife knows and her sister but i don't think id like anybody else close to me to know |
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What appears perfectly normal here looks totally different in vanilla land - " he/ she is part of a swingers community " can be a badge that would never leave you ( or your kids )
Guard your privacy and leave the unenlightened wallow in their own ignorance . |
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By *oci1Couple
over a year ago
Trim |
"my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses."
 good point as a single think couples and single females have so much more to loose especially when they have nippers  |
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"my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses. good point as a single think couples and single females have so much more to loose especially when they have nippers "
Yes but what you do here now sticks with you and your rep for life in this now instantly traceable electronic era. You may not care now but who knows what the future holds. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Very well said llong....  
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out."
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!! |
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"Very well said llong....
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out.
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!!"
Love I knew her too. She was lovely person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No one knows that I'm on this site. My closer friends know that I have nsa sex though and they don't care, it's my life after all.
I'd rather keep this to myself as the majority of people wouldn't understand and I wouldn't want it to affect my work or career. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Very well said llong....
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out.
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!!"
If it's the same lady I am thinking of and she was one lovely lady, her life got so messed up by it all I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Wasn't just her life that got ruined  |
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"Very well said llong....
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out.
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!!
If it's the same lady I am thinking of and she was one lovely lady, her life got so messed up by it all I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Wasn't just her life that got ruined "
Could happen to most here tbh. They tore everything in her life apart. There was nothing unusually vulnerable about this lady either. In fact probably quite the opposite. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Very well said llong....
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out.
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!!
If it's the same lady I am thinking of and she was one lovely lady, her life got so messed up by it all I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Wasn't just her life that got ruined
Could happen to most here tbh. They tore everything in her life apart. There was nothing unusually vulnerable about this lady either. In fact probably quite the opposite."
There was other motives and more to the story than just being on a swingers site. Not saying that it was right but there was a bigger picture  |
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Only one friend knows has a snoop on my profile. .
its horrible having is disclosed.
Im not hurting anyone im single but I have had someone threaten to tell on me.
Why can't people leave people alone.
I get the lifestyle ain't everyone's cup of tea.
Turn a blind eye.
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"Very well said llong....
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out.
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!!
If it's the same lady I am thinking of and she was one lovely lady, her life got so messed up by it all I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Wasn't just her life that got ruined
Could happen to most here tbh. They tore everything in her life apart. There was nothing unusually vulnerable about this lady either. In fact probably quite the opposite.
There was other motives and more to the story than just being on a swingers site. Not saying that it was right but there was a bigger picture "
Yes there were but it was the swingers thing was Achilles heal. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses. good point as a single think couples and single females have so much more to loose especially when they have nippers
Yes but what you do here now sticks uwith you and your rep for life in this now instantly traceable electronic era. You may not care now but who knows what the future holds."
the way i see it is its the same if for example we are all out nite clubbing every weekend and looking for one nite stands were just doing it over the internet instead which is nothing wrong with it i think.Off course im always carefull i dont bed hop lol a meet once a month if im lucky and plus im a single parent so that takes alot off my time too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses. good point as a single think couples and single females have so much more to loose especially when they have nippers
Yes but what you do here now sticks uwith you and your rep for life in this now instantly traceable electronic era. You may not care now but who knows what the future holds.
the way i see it is its the same if for example we are all out nite clubbing every weekend and looking for one nite stands were just doing it over the internet instead which is nothing wrong with it i think.Off course im always carefull i dont bed hop lol a meet once a month if im lucky and plus im a single parent so that takes alot off my time too."
I disagree, it's not the same thing. Nowadays going out and hooking up is 'common' enough.
But having sex with several people at the same time or couples having sex with others is not the same thing and I don't think it's accepted by the average vanilla person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The way I see it it's my secret until I change otherwise I respect people in the same situation but there is no crossover to normality This is in effect supposed to be a fantasy world where fantasies never entertained in real life and subjects and conversations would be awkward and in some areas even taboo There needs to be a clear distinction and separation and adult understanding of the consequences if precautions at all level aren't taken |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses. good point as a single think couples and single females have so much more to loose especially when they have nippers
Yes but what you do here now sticks uwith you and your rep for life in this now instantly traceable electronic era. You may not care now but who knows what the future holds.
the way i see it is its the same if for example we are all out nite clubbing every weekend and looking for one nite stands were just doing it over the internet instead which is nothing wrong with it i think.Off course im always carefull i dont bed hop lol a meet once a month if im lucky and plus im a single parent so that takes alot off my time too.
I disagree, it's not the same thing. Nowadays going out and hooking up is 'common' enough.
But having sex with several people at the same time or couples having sex with others is not the same thing and I don't think it's accepted by the average vanilla person. "
this is very true if u scored in a bar or a club one on one its no way near frowned upon as arranging to meet cpls or multiple people on a site especially a swingers sight there still enough taboos out there about open minded sex |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"my mates know i dont really care to be honest im free and single and live alone not hurting anyone and plus what i do in my own time is my bis and no one elses. good point as a single think couples and single females have so much more to loose especially when they have nippers
Yes but what you do here now sticks uwith you and your rep for life in this now instantly traceable electronic era. You may not care now but who knows what the future holds.
the way i see it is its the same if for example we are all out nite clubbing every weekend and looking for one nite stands were just doing it over the internet instead which is nothing wrong with it i think.Off course im always carefull i dont bed hop lol a meet once a month if im lucky and plus im a single parent so that takes alot off my time too.
I disagree, it's not the same thing. Nowadays going out and hooking up is 'common' enough.
But having sex with several people at the same time or couples having sex with others is not the same thing and I don't think it's accepted by the average vanilla person. "
well i think some people are very old fashoined when it comes to sex still but it still doesnt really bother me that im here i have needs just like the next person i c cant do relationships anymore to much hard work and i hardly go out.So this is this the best way for me to people if people dont like it thats up to them. |
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"My ma and most my friend no I had a threesome but nobody knows I'm on here
What did your ma think? Does she have any sisters my age? "
she jus laughed she's mad she meets up with men from plenty of fish n all haha she's single do u want her number haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Very well said llong....
Thank u curvy if u are who I think u are lol u probably remember old friend of ours from another site who had their life destroyed by being found out.
I remember a lovely lovely lady from the Belfast area wh I chatted with on another site was outted by a Sunday paper after a meet n greet. They used her pics her name n her profile info....ruined her. This was about 7 years ago. I hope she got over it...not a pleasant ordeal at all!!!"
But is that not illegal what that paper did. How were they allowed to print all that. Is there not a law that identities need to be hidden if the paper had not gotten that persons permission to print that. She was not doing anything illegal. The fact that she was using here real name by the sounds of is another matter but what the paper did sounds illegal????
That must have been terrible for her. Scary stuff
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just curious to hear stories of any one telling there friends or family about there secret swingers life style and there reactions or has any one been caught by friends or family in there swinger life styles etc etc etc we look forward to hearing any stories "
I saw my neighbour on here a few times (she married but on here as single)
but I never let on i saw her it gives me a wee giggle though when i bump into her in the shops or on the road lol |
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By *al2001Man
over a year ago
kildare |
I dont kno if this fits thread but any excuse to tell it.I kno a girl here who introduced her cousin to fab n threesomes, cause I was the m in that mff
Wonder is there a prize for the most milage 1 guy can get out of 1 story.id def win it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Apparently my husband knows according to user no longer uses site.... "your hubby knows your on here and has seen all your verifications good luck explaining that maybe you will learn to keep your legs closed instead of cheating on a decent man you slut"
nice
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I dont kno if this fits thread but any excuse to tell it.I kno a girl here who introduced her cousin to fab n threesomes, cause I was the m in that mff
Wonder is there a prize for the most milage 1 guy can get out of 1 story.id def win it "
I've heard of kissing cousins but 3sum cousins is a new one haha
Thou is she your cousin or the girls cousin lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently my husband knows according to user no longer uses site.... "your hubby knows your on here and has seen all your verifications good luck explaining that maybe you will learn to keep your legs closed instead of cheating on a decent man you slut"
nice
"
Yawn Yawn ZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
There's always 1 dickhead isnt there ??
Fuk him he's an arse-hole NAME AND SHAME THE PRICK |
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By *avie tCouple
over a year ago
otherside of nowhere |
No one knows we are swingers and if it's up to us no one ever will......it is completely different a single guy or girl hooking up in a club to a cpl swaping partners or a guy or girl having meets with the purpose of n.s.a.sex....this is the real world and yes ppl would frown on it |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"No one knows we are swingers and if it's up to us no one ever will......it is completely different a single guy or girl hooking up in a club to a cpl swaping partners or a guy or girl having meets with the purpose of n.s.a.sex....this is the real world and yes ppl would frown on it"
i do |
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By *avie tCouple
over a year ago
otherside of nowhere |
"No one knows we are swingers and if it's up to us no one ever will......it is completely different a single guy or girl hooking up in a club to a cpl swaping partners or a guy or girl having meets with the purpose of n.s.a.sex....this is the real world and yes ppl would frown on it
i do "
Don't mind you knowing....your as depraved as us..... |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"No one knows we are swingers and if it's up to us no one ever will......it is completely different a single guy or girl hooking up in a club to a cpl swaping partners or a guy or girl having meets with the purpose of n.s.a.sex....this is the real world and yes ppl would frown on it
i do
Don't mind you knowing....your as depraved as us....."
moi i am an |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A few of my friends know. Had to tell them shortly after I joined cos they demanded to know why i was being so secretive and where i was going the whole time. The girl i told wasn't impressed at all at first but she gets it now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A good friend in work knows... good for your safety really... And he knows to dispose of my Fabs bag in my drawer quickly if anything should happen to me  |
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George Bernard Shaw wrote a lot of terrible crap, but maybe his "The only secrets are those that keep themselves" is apt here.
When you tell one person a secret, it very rarely if ever stays with one person.
This is a very small country where six degrees of separation are in all probability three. |
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Good on your dad....he did right thing...there is a lot of trust involved with people you meet...especially down the country...every action has a reaction ..and people have to accept the consequences...but the vanilla brigade should be more understanding...and it should not be used to destroy peoples lives.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This might sound a bit morbid, but as a single profile on here i would like if there was a time based automatic 'delete profile' function that would automatically delete my profile if it was not accessed for a specified period of time.
My reasoning for this is if god forbid something happened to me tomorrow I would not like my profile to stay up for as long as fabs exists. I am single so i would have no one else to do it.
This could be a feature that you enable separately if you desired it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a young single female here I have to say it gets a tad lonely!!! Lol
Nobody knows about me being on here, I cud trust them I know that but I know deep down they'd b horrified and completely not understand!!
It's a shame cos it's just another side to me, being a swinger doesn't define any of us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Though none of my family or friends outside of fab know, i doubt they'd be overly shocked and tbh anybody who knows me in real life and found my profile and read my posts would know its me  |
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