Hey, so this is probably going to sound stupid. I joined here to find a connection with someone and meet people in a non pressure, keep public and private live separate kinda thing. While I was a very social person. I suffer from depression and I have always found dating hard ,all my life. It's just who I am. I thought exposing myself and connecting with people here would be easier. But I seems I can't do that right either. I find it hard to get personality across online ,without boring or offending people. And yes looks have alot to play with it here. As I have found out. I always gave and honest and straight answer. But trying to understand the double meaning of questions or thinking there is one, is a time bomb. I have always tried to be polite and honest. I read profiles properly so I can answer what is asked in them. I Know grammar is easy for most people, but if you don't learn young it's harder. And specially if you over think things.
But I still fail. Yes I know, 'Feck Off' would be alot of replies. I suppose the biggest thing for me was just chatting here. I have tried some parties in the past and yes people seem to like me. But I can't get to many as I have family and work matters take up alot of my time . And yes I am really single.
So I suppose what I am asking is, are there others here like me? |
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You have a variety of decent verifications which is much more than many have so maybe focusing on what has changed since your last one and what you are doing differently now might make a difference. |
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This place isn't easier than regular dating. If anything it's harder. Don't see that as a failure of something you did or who you are. This place is tough going at the best of times. Depression mixed with social difficulties can be so hard to get over. Seriously consider going to vanilla social events where you can meet people and engage in normal conversations and build up your confidence a bit. |
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By (user no longer on site) 2 weeks ago
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"Hey, so this is probably going to sound stupid. I joined here to find a connection with someone and meet people in a non pressure, keep public and private live separate kinda thing. While I was a very social person. I suffer from depression and I have always found dating hard ,all my life. It's just who I am. I thought exposing myself and connecting with people here would be easier. But I seems I can't do that right either. I find it hard to get personality across online ,without boring or offending people. And yes looks have alot to play with it here. As I have found out. I always gave and honest and straight answer. But trying to understand the double meaning of questions or thinking there is one, is a time bomb. I have always tried to be polite and honest. I read profiles properly so I can answer what is asked in them. I Know grammar is easy for most people, but if you don't learn young it's harder. And specially if you over think things.
But I still fail. Yes I know, 'Feck Off' would be alot of replies. I suppose the biggest thing for me was just chatting here. I have tried some parties in the past and yes people seem to like me. But I can't get to many as I have family and work matters take up alot of my time . And yes I am really single.
So I suppose what I am asking is, are there others here like me?"
I'm in the exact same situation as you mate but you are doing a whole lot better than me just stay positive and have some patience and try to make friends as best you can. The other thing is try your best to get to a social probably the only way to meet friends.Don't be too hard on yourself you are doing very well. |
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Having a moment of crisis on here is common. There's certainly a bigger emphasis on physical attraction here than in dating and you know what? Totally understandable, if people are here for sex, they obviously want attraction. Now that doesn't mean being the biggest dick dickhead will get you places. You've been verified by some people I know and if they have a good word to say about you, you should wear it as a badge of honor. |
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Your feelings are quite common and there seems to be a little bullying in all these sites. You need to be a little confident, belive in yourself and ignore the abuse.
I'm not doing as much on here as I like and my partner has not followed me to this site much but tbh don't put too much into thinking
Oh and try get party invites. That worked for me in the UK |
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I think you're just normal.
There's not one guy out there who has it all down. You could be being a bit hard on yourself.
Any social media wouldn't be very social, you can see that everywhere, so I wouldn't be holding any candle to it.
Millions of guys out there thinking the same, so I wouldn't be blaming depression either. It's in all of us.
Look at all the info floating around about how we should be doing this, acting like that, achieving whatever.
Fuck it, just be yourself and do the things that bring joy.
You're in Dungarvin. Go to the Roma Grill in Youghal, best takeaway, and go for a walk along the Copper Coast.  |
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I think there is a big opening for a novice/newbie social with the view to organising a play party at some stage. This whole scene can be very overwhelming for the inexperienced amongst us. Myself included. |
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"I think there is a big opening for a novice/newbie social with the view to organising a play party at some stage. This whole scene can be very overwhelming for the inexperienced amongst us. Myself included."
Quite a few events do have pre-meets for nervous newbies if that helps at all. |
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By *rTromboneMan 2 weeks ago
clonmel youghal dungarvan triangle |
"Hey, so this is probably going to sound stupid. I joined here to find a connection with someone and meet people in a non pressure, keep public and private live separate kinda thing. While I was a very social person. I suffer from depression and I have always found dating hard ,all my life. It's just who I am. I thought exposing myself and connecting with people here would be easier. But I seems I can't do that right either. I find it hard to get personality across online ,without boring or offending people. And yes looks have alot to play with it here. As I have found out. I always gave and honest and straight answer. But trying to understand the double meaning of questions or thinking there is one, is a time bomb. I have always tried to be polite and honest. I read profiles properly so I can answer what is asked in them. I Know grammar is easy for most people, but if you don't learn young it's harder. And specially if you over think things.
But I still fail. Yes I know, 'Feck Off' would be alot of replies. I suppose the biggest thing for me was just chatting here. I have tried some parties in the past and yes people seem to like me. But I can't get to many as I have family and work matters take up alot of my time . And yes I am really single.
So I suppose what I am asking is, are there others here like me?"
Hi Youghal23. Trying to dm you, but your settings don't allow. Can you dm me, I am in same situation, can offer whatever help. |
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"I think there is a big opening for a novice/newbie social with the view to organising a play party at some stage. This whole scene can be very overwhelming for the inexperienced amongst us. Myself included."
Go to a daytime coffee social, they are the easiest way to get started. There's one on in Limerick soon. |
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By *aid backMan 2 weeks ago
by a lake with my rod out |
Op as someone who deals/dealt with depression over the years I get you. But don't let that define you. As for finding it hard on fab I can only suggest getting to meet and greet, coffee socials etc 5 mins in person talking is better that 20 emails. |
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