FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Dark room, what happens there? We never been to one
Dark room, what happens there? We never been to one
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The thing is any room ends up being defined by the assumptions of the people who go on there. If people assume a dark room means it's a free for all, someone may act accordingly.
This goes for any situation, dark rooms, swingers parties, nearly any violation that occurs is always a result of someone assuming a certain environment employed consent.
Definitely look for any rules being defined.
I've been to a club in Spain that had a room that was dark, it was meant to be a room with couples on one side, guys watching on the other, and bars in between. Meaning they can watch, or reach through. When someone put their hand on my underwear and tried to finger me out of nowhere, I realised that lack of clear consent was a huge turn off for me.
Seen this topic come up a few times on the forum, and it's often the guys saying it's their fantasy, and women saying the assumption of consent makes it terrifying.
I love a pile of people having group sex, but I would need to pick who was there, and s t boundaries ahead of time. |
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"The thing is any room ends up being defined by the assumptions of the people who go on there. If people assume a dark room means it's a free for all, someone may act accordingly.
This goes for any situation, dark rooms, swingers parties, nearly any violation that occurs is always a result of someone assuming a certain environment employed consent.
Definitely look for any rules being defined.
I've been to a club in Spain that had a room that was dark, it was meant to be a room with couples on one side, guys watching on the other, and bars in between. Meaning they can watch, or reach through. When someone put their hand on my underwear and tried to finger me out of nowhere, I realised that lack of clear consent was a huge turn off for me.
Seen this topic come up a few times on the forum, and it's often the guys saying it's their fantasy, and women saying the assumption of consent makes it terrifying.
I love a pile of people having group sex, but I would need to pick who was there, and s t boundaries ahead of time. "
Well exactly, it seemed like you read our mind.
I would love to be in Dark (or semi dark) room along with multiple couples and if the other couples/male/female would want to touch you, they ask for consent and vise versa.
So the fantasy is getting fulfilled and you are not getting violated too |
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I think the whole point of darkroom play is that you aren't sure who is touching you. It plays into the old school idea that swingers are willing to play with anyone (think keys in bowls). In reality I think most people have preferences and like to choose their partners. |
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I've never experienced this and wouldn't have any interest in it for the same reasons that gloryholes don't appeal.
I like to know exactly who is touching me and who I am touching.
I can't see how you could choose who to give consent to in a dark room. How would you determine if you were ok with one person but not another if you couldn't see them? |
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I think you'd need to be comfortable with the people in the room with you and willing to have sex with any of them
That's hard enough to find I'd imagine
The biggest problem is trying to ensure safe sex in the dark |
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We went to the darkroom in Fata Morgana, we jumped back out again as fast. Absolutely not for us, zero consent, just groping and touching free for all. Bear in mind this was in a top couples only club, can’t imagine what it would be like if singles were allowed. Yes the Dutch are far more open and tolerant but still not a nice scenario, no regrets we tried it tho. |
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If individual consent was hugely important to me I don't think I'd even consider a dark room in a club.
The only way it would ever be something that might appeal to me is if I had control over who was in there, like if it was a pre-arranged thing |
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By *_05Man 16 hours ago
D11 |
Anything that implies you don't know who is doing what (blindfolded and someone comes into the room or dark room) or something that is spontaneous seems to be the opposite when it comes to actually fulfilling the fantasy and would take a lot of planning so that everyone feels comfortable/safe |
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I've tried it and didn't like it. There were people in the room I had no intention of touching, as they didn't appeal to me, but they touched me. It was interesting, but not remotely erotic. I'm a voyeur, I need to see who and what is happening, with attractive people. |
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By *D24Couple 5 hours ago
Dublin |
"I've never experienced this and wouldn't have any interest in it for the same reasons that gloryholes don't appeal.
I like to know exactly who is touching me and who I am touching.
I can't see how you could choose who to give consent to in a dark room. How would you determine if you were ok with one person but not another if you couldn't see them? "
Agree with this, I want to know who is touching me and vice versa, and consent is a massive consideration |
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