FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Where are all the bi men hiding?
Where are all the bi men hiding?
Jump to: Newest in thread
I'm pansexual, so naturally I also like bisexual and bicurious (using Fab's terms) partners. Yet I'm told that many men hide their true sexual interests on Fab because being 'openly' bi as a man can result in automatically being blocked* by others. It makes the search function redundant for me if going by sexual orientation.
Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts.
*Needless to say anyone can block whomever they like for whatever reasons or none at all. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm pansexual, so naturally I also like bisexual and bicurious (using Fab's terms) partners. Yet I'm told that many men hide their true sexual interests on Fab because being 'openly' bi as a man can result in automatically being blocked* by others. It makes the search function redundant for me if going by sexual orientation.
Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts.
*Needless to say anyone can block whomever they like for whatever reasons or none at all."
I’m bi and not hiding. I saw women and couple profiles where they stated that they are not interested in bi guys, that can be the reason some bi guys prefer to pretend to be straight. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By *elfbiMan 3 weeks ago
belfast/Down, but can travel. |
I'm BI, but can and do play straight, depending on the preferences of who I'm with.
I get regularly contacted by "Straight" guys looking to meet.
I also know couples and ladies who won't meet straight guys. But nowadays its becoming less stigmatised being bi. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
No we are here but mixed in with the thousands of Straight guys so we blend in. A lot of couples with straight guys don't like to play with Bi/Bi curious guys (they are totaly free to do so) unsure why we can play both ways, maybe they afrade we would turn them to the I side.... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By * BlackMan 3 weeks ago
Laois/ Dublin |
We are here the Bisexuals and We are proud.
We get mixed press depending on who we are talking to.
I dont think there's any stereotypical Biseual human.
Bisesxual Sapiosexual with Pansexual and Demisexual traits here and it's great fun navigating it. I don't have time or the interest in people's stigmatism of others.
  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We are here the Bisexuals and We are proud.
We get mixed press depending on who we are talking to.
I dont think there's any stereotypical Biseual human.
Bisesxual Sapiosexual with Pansexual and Demisexual traits here and it's great fun navigating it. I don't have time or the interest in people's stigmatism of others.
"
❤️ love it!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm pansexual, so naturally I also like bisexual and bicurious (using Fab's terms) partners. Yet I'm told that many men hide their true sexual interests on Fab because being 'openly' bi as a man can result in automatically being blocked* by others. It makes the search function redundant for me if going by sexual orientation.
Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts.
*Needless to say anyone can block whomever they like for whatever reasons or none at all."
We are here 🙋♂️. I don't hide it on my profile, but it's not something I'm on this site looking for, so everyone is blocked from messaging me apart from females,
I'm not on the fabguys site at all, but I wouldn't be shouting about being bi outside of fab. took me 18 years to say it to myself and except who I am, fair if it comes up in conversation with whoever and I'm comfortable I'll say it, |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We are here the Bisexuals and We are proud.
We get mixed press depending on who we are talking to.
I dont think there's any stereotypical Biseual human.
Bisesxual Sapiosexual with Pansexual and Demisexual traits here and it's great fun navigating it. I don't have time or the interest in people's stigmatism of others.
"
love this. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *oZi23Couple 3 weeks ago
Louth |
"We are here the Bisexuals and We are proud.
We get mixed press depending on who we are talking to.
I dont think there's any stereotypical Biseual human.
Bisesxual Sapiosexual with Pansexual and Demisexual traits here and it's great fun navigating it. I don't have time or the interest in people's stigmatism of others.
"
Yes!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts. "
In fairness, there are relatively few men who identify as bi, and even fewer would be willing to openly state it. And yes, some women and couples express a preference against bi guys (which is totally ok!), so that further disincentivises stating it openly…
But that doesn’t really help you, admittedly. Perhaps clearly saying that’s what you’re after would help? Or might attract dudes who’d lie about it :shrug: |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'm not hiding, at least not on here. Outside of fab only my wife knows I'm bi.
It can be a disadvantage on here as there are quite a few people who will meet straight, but not bi, men. There have been misconceptions that as a bi man you are basically shagging all around with no morals or boundaries.
The reality is that bi men are much more cautious in who they meet. The really indiscriminate ones are the men who are "straight" on their profile in here, yet also have a profile on Fabguys looking to meet men. It's not just single men who hide their bi side on here, some male part of couples do it too.
I thought the whole point of this site was to be able to be open & honest about who you are & who you want to meet.
Like a previous poster, I have met with couples for straight threesomes with no issues. Once boundaries set & respected there should be no problem.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We are fully Bi and out and proud. We are a heterosexual couple but consider ourselves Queer and have a bit of Demisexuality and a bit of Slutdom.
We would love to find single Bi guys for MMF and Bi couples for a same gender same room swap. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We find it frustrating that a lot of messages from men state on their profile that they are straight and then in messages say they are Bi. A lie is not a good way to start!
"
Exactly this. I explicitly state on my profile that I am not interested in straight men but the amount of them who message me telling me they're actually bi is astounding.
From what I understand a lot of them are afraid that their bisexuality will put some women off, but what they seem to fail to grasp is that it works both ways (pun intended ) and that a lot of us queer folks find the whole "straight acting" thing a major turn off. It took me a long time to get out of the closet and I've no intention of returning for a visit. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's interesting how many messages I've received from this by those who feel the need to remain incognito"
I wonder how much of it is because a lot of men on this are playing the numbers with one goal in mind. They think that staying incognito will increase their chances (and it possibly does), because quantity over quality.
To be fair, I’m sure it’s not everyone, and there are other reasons to keep it hidden. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As Bi-Curious (will 100% try it out a few times to fully explore) I was initially put off by the amount of messages on here for ‘blow and go’ etc.
Could be a factor.
I can’t imagine what women go through on a daily basis on here 😂 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It could be that enough don't have experience to know. Id class myself as straight, it's all about the lady for me. But in that, there are fantasies I have that may be considered bi. Like I'd eventually give fuck licking a try, or up close watching, but again I'm more interested in her enjoying herself rather than him. And I have no interest in a dude playing with me. So, grey margin I suppose hahaha. But basically what I'm getting at is maybe there are lads that are curious, but have no experience to know if they are or aren't, so put down straight. Also read forum posts of lads pretending to be bi just to get in with a couple to play with the female. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Have mine openly bi on here. No issue with it and comfortable enough, at least as far as fab goes 
But as has been said already, there's some that are bi and don't disclose it. They may not be comfortable stating it or unsure how they feel or want to try and meet someone who states no bi guys. Any number of reasons really. People can be complicated!
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Before I wrote this post, I have had more than one guy message me from their multiple accounts. One stating straight, the other bicurious, and the third with bisexual. I'm awaiting a 4-in-a-row; nobody yet with a fourth account stating gay. That would the ultimate numbers game on Fab!
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Before I wrote this post, I have had more than one guy message me from their multiple accounts. One stating straight, the other bicurious, and the third with bisexual.Fab!
"
How did the message text vary during their sexual evolution? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *exytvlegsTV/TS 3 weeks ago
North co dublin Ireland |
The amount of guys message you
And profile says there stright then when you ask them should it not say bi
1 answer o I must change it
I don't know how to change it
One guy was up front told me if he puts bi a lot woman don't want to meet |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *dfabMan 2 weeks ago
Dunboyne |
"I'm pansexual, so naturally I also like bisexual and bicurious (using Fab's terms) partners. Yet I'm told that many men hide their true sexual interests on Fab because being 'openly' bi as a man can result in automatically being blocked* by others. It makes the search function redundant for me if going by sexual orientation.
Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts.
*Needless to say anyone can block whomever they like for whatever reasons or none at all."
Perhaps you could reason for your questioning?
If you were meeting 1 on 1, what difference does it make?
If a group session, then the reason is obvious.
Do you think straight/bi preference makes them think a different way, or act/treat you differently?
I'm curious.
I might even be bi-curious but who knows |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Bi male here too, love mm, mmf, mf play or any play at all, also attached which is obviously a major no no for most women so picking safe pretty much zero for me, I do get meets on the sister site though |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm pansexual, so naturally I also like bisexual and bicurious (using Fab's terms) partners. Yet I'm told that many men hide their true sexual interests on Fab because being 'openly' bi as a man can result in automatically being blocked* by others. It makes the search function redundant for me if going by sexual orientation.
Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts.
*Needless to say anyone can block whomever they like for whatever reasons or none at all."
hi I'm not hiding x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
There are quite a few bi men here on fab.. but I also believe there are many who mention themselves as straight on their profiles to attract more women and couples. Never seem to understand the reason though..
I am openly bi and always look forward to meeting bi men or couples. I feel there is a special fire when all play together and each person is looking to satisfy the other. Have been with a few bi couples and I must say they were one helluva experiences.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Very much bi, but a large problem for me personally on here is how many bi people don’t want to meet bi men that aren’t in a couple - including a lot of people here lol
If that’s not what you’re looking for, of course that’s fine, but at the structural level that’s a huge issue I can’t get around
"I'm pansexual, so naturally I also like bisexual and bicurious (using Fab's terms) partners. Yet I'm told that many men hide their true sexual interests on Fab because being 'openly' bi as a man can result in automatically being blocked* by others. It makes the search function redundant for me if going by sexual orientation.
Are bi men in hiding? Or are they simply hanging out in greater numbers on Fabguys instead? I'm interested in other people's thoughts.
*Needless to say anyone can block whomever they like for whatever reasons or none at all."
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Perhaps you could reason for your questioning?
If you were meeting 1 on 1, what difference does it make?
If a group session, then the reason is obvious.
Do you think straight/bi preference makes them think a different way, or act/treat you differently?
I'm curious.
I might even be bi-curious but who knows "
For me it's part of being aware of other people's limits. For example when talking dirty I'm not going to bring up scenarios which would be the opposite of a turn-on. I'm also going to be mindful of what future play we will engage in with singles, couples, and groups.
Personally I like the freedom and creativity it gives for sexual play when all genders and orientations can be considered for fun |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *dfabMan 2 weeks ago
Dunboyne |
"Perhaps you could reason for your questioning?
If you were meeting 1 on 1, what difference does it make?
If a group session, then the reason is obvious.
Do you think straight/bi preference makes them think a different way, or act/treat you differently?
I'm curious.
I might even be bi-curious but who knows
For me it's part of being aware of other people's limits. For example when talking dirty I'm not going to bring up scenarios which would be the opposite of a turn-on. I'm also going to be mindful of what future play we will engage in with singles, couples, and groups.
Personally I like the freedom and creativity it gives for sexual play when all genders and orientations can be considered for fun"
Well I think when talking dirty/fantasies that's exactly the opportunity to introduce these ideas a little and see what the response is from the other party. For example, suggesting the third in a MFM engages in some oral(covered or not individual choice)between the 2 M and how excited it makes the F feel is one thing that might entice a M but going straight in to saying how you'd like a MMF triple penetrative experience might be a step too far for the individual reader.
I completely understand the fluid scenario you desire but breadcrumbs/small steps perhaps for those you encounter with an open mind who have an understandable apprehension of how it may go.
It appears you are conscious and aware of this and likely an ideal partner for those who are bi-curious but straight on profile  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Perhaps you could reason for your questioning?
If you were meeting 1 on 1, what difference does it make?
If a group session, then the reason is obvious.
Do you think straight/bi preference makes them think a different way, or act/treat you differently?
I'm curious.
I might even be bi-curious but who knows
For me it's part of being aware of other people's limits. For example when talking dirty I'm not going to bring up scenarios which would be the opposite of a turn-on. I'm also going to be mindful of what future play we will engage in with singles, couples, and groups.
Personally I like the freedom and creativity it gives for sexual play when all genders and orientations can be considered for fun"
Totally agree |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
In fairness so far I've put out an interest to try a double blowjob from a bi couple and that alone has distanced a lot of profiles from me, despite the fact I've yet to achieve that goal. So it came be daunting at times |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I put a status today mentioning bi men and have had people message me saying they do not want to consider me for future play because of that. It is bizarre! No wonder people keep quiet. Even if they never indulge their interests |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I put a status today mentioning bi men and have had people message me saying they do not want to consider me for future play because of that. It is bizarre! No wonder people keep quiet. Even if they never indulge their interests "
That's atrocious, I wonder do the same people expect the women to be Bi, and 'put on a show' for the male viewing pleasure. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I put a status today mentioning bi men and have had people message me saying they do not want to consider me for future play because of that. It is bizarre! No wonder people keep quiet. Even if they never indulge their interests
That's atrocious, I wonder do the same people expect the women to be Bi, and 'put on a show' for the male viewing pleasure. "
They could be women |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I put a status today mentioning bi men and have had people message me saying they do not want to consider me for future play because of that. It is bizarre! No wonder people keep quiet. Even if they never indulge their interests
That's atrocious, I wonder do the same people expect the women to be Bi, and 'put on a show' for the male viewing pleasure.
They could be women "
Even if they are there's a double standard about the expected 'bi-ness' of women and the disgust at men being the same. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I put a status today mentioning bi men and have had people message me saying they do not want to consider me for future play because of that. It is bizarre! No wonder people keep quiet. Even if they never indulge their interests
That's atrocious, I wonder do the same people expect the women to be Bi, and 'put on a show' for the male viewing pleasure.
They could be women
Even if they are there's a double standard about the expected 'bi-ness' of women and the disgust at men being the same. "
So what ?
There are far bigger problems in the world than worrying about peoples opinions and prejudices.
You think there are many Palestinians waking up today thinking about their gender or if they might be harshly judged because they like sucking the odd cock every now and then?
#letitgo
#gowiththeflow
#ajuicyassisajuicyass |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I met a woman for a social here years ago and we are still friends now.
A few weeks after we verified each other I got 2 messages from two different but well verified single female profiles.
They told me that because this woman had met bi men in the past I was now tainted and not only would they never meet me for that reason but I needed to hide the verification because nobody else would ever want to meet me after that.
When I asked how having a coffee with someone who had verified a bi man about 3 years before that could "taint" me they said I was encouraging disgusting behaviour and they needed to remove people like that from the site.
Turns out both profiles were the same woman and she had messaged every one of the other woman's veries to say the same.
I ignored her and blocked her but that was my first experience of the mad shite that can go on here and showed that no matter how many people verify someone as lovely and amazing it doesn't make them any less of a cunt to others.
The telling point for me was that the vast majority of her verifications were from other women, most of whom were bi and so was she according to both profiles. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I put a status today mentioning bi men and have had people message me saying they do not want to consider me for future play because of that. It is bizarre! No wonder people keep quiet. Even if they never indulge their interests "
Just wondering had you been chatting to these people with a view to playing or were they just random people on fab who decided to message you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
One of my best moments on fab was when I wrote a thread about my first bi experience on here with a couple
I had nothing but good wishes on the thread because I was genuinely scared of admitting I was bi at the age of 54
If someone doesn't want to know me because of that I really couldn't give a toss
All I'll say to people are be true to yourself and any sexual partner you find on fab as you'll enjoy it more
I'll also repeat what I always say it's easier to find your tribe if you get to a social especially one with a hotel involved |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"One of my best moments on fab was when I wrote a thread about my first bi experience on here with a couple
I had nothing but good wishes on the thread because I was genuinely scared of admitting I was bi at the age of 54
If someone doesn't want to know me because of that I really couldn't give a toss
All I'll say to people are be true to yourself and any sexual partner you find on fab as you'll enjoy it more
I'll also repeat what I always say it's easier to find your tribe if you get to a social especially one with a hotel involved "
So when are you organising this for  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I am bi and it’s great. Fab took a while to grasp but it’s happy days now.
Re the whole cover up thing, it’s real.
I get looooads of winks and messages from straight lads who genuinely don’t see themselves as in any way bi or anything else.
Re the caution for couples/women around bi men that’s real too. In some telegram groups women have launched a private chat not knowing and have dropped off and stopped chatting once that’s declared.
And to be clear that’s cool, it’s all personal preferences and individual choices. Which is why I’m upfront asap if it’s not already communicated.
Saying all that it’s way easier to be open than it was say 15 years ago. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Most of the guys who express an interest in bi play have straight profiles. Having discussed this with most of them we have found
1. Some frightened to display bi for fear of not getting meets
2. Some struggle with the idea in their heads (I’m not gay but I would like to……..)
3. Many not really bi at all and just using it to try and get a threesome and with the wife. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the guys who express an interest in bi play have straight profiles. Having discussed this with most of them we have found
1. Some frightened to display bi for fear of not getting meets
2. Some struggle with the idea in their heads (I’m not gay but I would like to……..)
3. Many not really bi at all and just using it to try and get a threesome and with the wife. "
Well summarised!
As a pansexual CD, even I struggled with point number 2 lol. Day to day life I’d consider myself straight with no attraction to men. Yet, I get regular urges to dress up, act feminine and crave meeting men! Is it just a fetish? Is it my deep rooted bi urges just hiding? I still don’t know! I know it’s an open term but “queer” is a nice bracket I’d more put myself under.
One thing that is disheartening is how blunt or mean some profiles can be with the “ABSOLUTELY NO BI / CDS”. People are entitled to their preferences but it seems harsh and mean the way it’s displayed.
I do wish we lived in a society where being bi was more acceptable and wasn’t a big deal.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the guys who express an interest in bi play have straight profiles. Having discussed this with most of them we have found
1. Some frightened to display bi for fear of not getting meets
2. Some struggle with the idea in their heads (I’m not gay but I would like to……..)
3. Many not really bi at all and just using it to try and get a threesome and with the wife.
Well summarised!
As a pansexual CD, even I struggled with point number 2 lol. Day to day life I’d consider myself straight with no attraction to men. Yet, I get regular urges to dress up, act feminine and crave meeting men! Is it just a fetish? Is it my deep rooted bi urges just hiding? I still don’t know! I know it’s an open term but “queer” is a nice bracket I’d more put myself under.
One thing that is disheartening is how blunt or mean some profiles can be with the “ABSOLUTELY NO BI / CDS”. People are entitled to their preferences but it seems harsh and mean the way it’s displayed.
I do wish we lived in a society where being bi was more acceptable and wasn’t a big deal.
"
hopefully some day everyone will be accepted no matter what sexual preferences they have and everyone will just get along with everyone |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
