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By *astello OP Woman 2 weeks ago
Far far away |
Just curious. Does fabbing interactions have a life span. From first contact to meeting. Are you a quick meeter or drawn out..once met does it linger or fizzle out. Would love to hear experiences.
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Ya i definitely think there's a life span on interactions on here.
I'd sooner meet early and see if an attraction as I find it hard to keep interest going in text especially when I've no interest in sex chat |
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By *ustBoWoman 2 weeks ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
When I am meeting I prefer to chat for a bit before meeting. I don't do sex chat on here and that tends to put off those who want wank material only. Which is fine.
The only social I did within a day or so of starting to chat ended up being the worst and scariest meet I've ever had on here. So I'll stick to chatting for a while,it always worked for me I found. |
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We have to chat for a while simply because we can't meet quickly. We have too much other stuff on in our lives. That seems to offend a lot of people so we put on our profile about having patience. Although I don't know any other person who has clear weekends with no other commitments.
I also do don't sex talk. It's so boring and unsexy when you don't know the other person and have no rapport yet. Also s out the wanking fodder hunters.
And someone who is prepared to put a bit of effort in to build a connection is better so when we do get to meet, it's less likely to be a bad meet.
How long? It has been three months! And that's just to the first social. That's even too long for me, it's frustrating but life gets in the way! |
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Great thread. I have more fab friends than in real life. Possibly. I chat to them regularly but off the site normally. Still to meet some of them for the first time due to ‘real life stuff’.
Taking time to chat before meeting is very important. But it could be hours days weeks or months - you get a feel and instinct - before diaries align. |
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I'm not currently meeting so it's all chat.
When I am meeting it can been anything from a few weeks to a few months before that first social depending on circumstances.
I've only had one spontaneous meet after speaking for a day and it was forgettable. |
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By *astello OP Woman 2 weeks ago
Far far away |
It's interesting to read others experiences. I like to chat for a while but inevitably it fizzles out, especially if you don't keep it alive with sex chat. Does it depend on interest level of both parties? I often think fab is like a merry-go-round every every rotation is a dizzying new sight and you lose interest quickly.
I'm lucky to have great fab friends now but there few and far between to cultivate and build on. |
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"It's interesting to read others experiences. I like to chat for a while but inevitably it fizzles out, especially if you don't keep it alive with sex chat. Does it depend on interest level of both parties? I often think fab is like a merry-go-round every every rotation is a dizzying new sight and you lose interest quickly.
I'm lucky to have great fab friends now but there few and far between to cultivate and build on. "
Ah but it all depends on who you're chatting to and what ye have in common?
I have met people on here months ago that I still chat with mostly everyday. Now I must say I love a chat and I'm also a good listener so that helps. Chats with flirting with double meanings bring it on! Love banter and interaction and also a good positive discussion in various subjects |
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Agree. It’s exciting even exhilarating to begin a new chat. Great messages full of interesting fun and varied topics that excite the mind as well as body.
Often for me it ends with the face pic.
Or if the person lives too far away and no chance of meeting in the foreseeable future.
But when you do meet it’s like being a teenager all over again. 😉 |
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"It's interesting to read others experiences. I like to chat for a while but inevitably it fizzles out, especially if you don't keep it alive with sex chat. Does it depend on interest level of both parties? I often think fab is like a merry-go-round every every rotation is a dizzying new sight and you lose interest quickly.
I'm lucky to have great fab friends now but there few and far between to cultivate and build on. "
For me sex chat kills it rather than keeps it alive.
Some people and I have to include single women in that as they are the only demographic I generally speak to, struggle to talk about anything other than sex and that becomes very repetitive and boring very quickly. |
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I think for me it very much depends on the individual but generally I'd prefer to meet as early as is possible.
There are those I can chat away to for ages with no problem at all, with others it's less easy and things inevitably fizzle out (although sometimes can be rekindled at a later date).
Sex chat beyond the jokey or practical kills it instantly for me too. |
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By *enitMan 2 weeks ago
Galway |
Always enjoy chatting.
Have found it has meant that I know after a few chats that I've no interest in meeting the person.
So far have not moved on to a meeting.
One arrangement was made but she didn't show after all the chat. |
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"When I am meeting I prefer to chat for a bit before meeting. I don't do sex chat on here and that tends to put off those who want wank material only. Which is fine.
The only social I did within a day or so of starting to chat ended up being the worst and scariest meet I've ever had on here. So I'll stick to chatting for a while,it always worked for me I found. "
What happened during your worst and scariest moment ?. |
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Pretty new here so we might change, but right now we don't really feel comfortable about extended text chat, despite us naturally being big readers/writers. But in the context here, it doesn't fit somehow. A couple messages are enough for us to get a general vibe and at that point we'd prefer a quick social. Scheduling these is a lot more complicated than expected though, life on both ends gets a lot in the way...
There are exceptions though, with people who quickly feel like remote friends, turning into an unexpected pen pal experience, one of them on this very thread.
As far as we're concerned, profile text and meaningful opening messages go a long way in generating interest and the form it'll take. |
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By *ustBoWoman 2 weeks ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"When I am meeting I prefer to chat for a bit before meeting. I don't do sex chat on here and that tends to put off those who want wank material only. Which is fine.
The only social I did within a day or so of starting to chat ended up being the worst and scariest meet I've ever had on here. So I'll stick to chatting for a while,it always worked for me I found.
What happened during your worst and scariest moment ?."
After having a coffee we left the cafe went back to our cars to leave I had opened my car door when he suddenly pinned he against the car and started grabbing at my clothes I said no several well shouted and a few seconds later I got one hand free and pushed him off me.He only then backed off. When I asked him what the hell he was doing his answer was I was on fab he thought I'd be up for it. I drove home shaking. He had deleted his account when I got home and went to report him. I almost left fab after that.
But never again will I meet someone quickly as I have found that people can't hide behind a false facade if you chat for a while. And I never walked back to my car with anyone I met after that either. |
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By *og-ManMan 2 weeks ago
somewhere |
Never messaged sex talk in my life and not going to start now
First few play meets were within a day or two of initial messages
95 % of my chats are just friendly chatting with people I admire on here or actually friends
Some of these chats would have gaps of weeks in them but then just pick up again for a while
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"Just curious. Does fabbing interactions have a life span. From first contact to meeting. Are you a quick meeter or drawn out..once met does it linger or fizzle out. Would love to hear experiences.
"
.....
All of the above. |
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By *s LollyWoman 2 weeks ago
The pub then supermacs ... |
Whilst i get distance can be an issue an real life takes priority if i don't meet up soon i loose interest rapidly, sex chat i find cringy so there's only so much ye can keep going with before ye loose the will to live 🤷 |
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"When I am meeting I prefer to chat for a bit before meeting. I don't do sex chat on here and that tends to put off those who want wank material only. Which is fine.
The only social I did within a day or so of starting to chat ended up being the worst and scariest meet I've ever had on here. So I'll stick to chatting for a while,it always worked for me I found.
What happened during your worst and scariest moment ?.
After having a coffee we left the cafe went back to our cars to leave I had opened my car door when he suddenly pinned he against the car and started grabbing at my clothes I said no several well shouted and a few seconds later I got one hand free and pushed him off me.He only then backed off. When I asked him what the hell he was doing his answer was I was on fab he thought I'd be up for it. I drove home shaking. He had deleted his account when I got home and went to report him. I almost left fab after that.
But never again will I meet someone quickly as I have found that people can't hide behind a false facade if you chat for a while. And I never walked back to my car with anyone I met after that either."
Yikes! |
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By *astello OP Woman 2 weeks ago
Far far away |
"When I am meeting I prefer to chat for a bit before meeting. I don't do sex chat on here and that tends to put off those who want wank material only. Which is fine.
The only social I did within a day or so of starting to chat ended up being the worst and scariest meet I've ever had on here. So I'll stick to chatting for a while,it always worked for me I found.
What happened during your worst and scariest moment ?.
After having a coffee we left the cafe went back to our cars to leave I had opened my car door when he suddenly pinned he against the car and started grabbing at my clothes I said no several well shouted and a few seconds later I got one hand free and pushed him off me.He only then backed off. When I asked him what the hell he was doing his answer was I was on fab he thought I'd be up for it. I drove home shaking. He had deleted his account when I got home and went to report him. I almost left fab after that.
But never again will I meet someone quickly as I have found that people can't hide behind a false facade if you chat for a while. And I never walked back to my car with anyone I met after that either."
Very sad to hear of your experience. I guess that story resonates with me from the experience of safety. The expectation of your on fab you're up for it , it's very poor judgement by people. |
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"When I am meeting I prefer to chat for a bit before meeting. I don't do sex chat on here and that tends to put off those who want wank material only. Which is fine.
The only social I did within a day or so of starting to chat ended up being the worst and scariest meet I've ever had on here. So I'll stick to chatting for a while,it always worked for me I found.
What happened during your worst and scariest moment ?.
After having a coffee we left the cafe went back to our cars to leave I had opened my car door when he suddenly pinned he against the car and started grabbing at my clothes I said no several well shouted and a few seconds later I got one hand free and pushed him off me.He only then backed off. When I asked him what the hell he was doing his answer was I was on fab he thought I'd be up for it. I drove home shaking. He had deleted his account when I got home and went to report him. I almost left fab after that.
But never again will I meet someone quickly as I have found that people can't hide behind a false facade if you chat for a while. And I never walked back to my car with anyone I met after that either."
I'm.so sorry this happened to you, it happened me too, V female. 1st one was vanilla dating site but he went a lot further and I've got counselling from Nexus. I think he felt that by turning up at all I was implying agreement. Then another one on Fet as he got out the car he was undoing his zip and walking towards ne and attempted to push me to my knees. It's horrific.
I actually have a fear of being in cars now with a male. So that's why dogging or even the thought of it is really disturbing. |
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By *astello OP Woman 2 weeks ago
Far far away |
This is part of the challenges of fab. Maintaining the momentum, protecting your safety, and also your mental health.
Due diligence on who your meeting, protecting yourself, and essentially having fun without the drama.
The fab merry-go-round..exciting to try out, dizzying after a while, but occasionally you want get off to solid ground. |
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I like meeting ASAP in a safe and neutral place, any bad vibes at all, any pushiness, or entitlement or refusing to meet socially, last minute pushing to change venue, then it's a NO. Any rudeness, immediate steering to what they want, then No.
Manners and lack of, tell a lot.
I think we all have very short attention spans these days. It's all pretty fleeting, even the successful connections. People like to protect their freedom and personal space. |
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I don't over think it when it comes to meeting. I just let things flow naturally. Some things take off really quickly and others are slow burning embers. I enjoy tending to the good stuff. I'm not interested in lot's of coffee meets with random people, on the off chance we might get on. Just coffee with people I really like. 🙂
I don't engage in sex messages. There's one person I send the odd risqué message to, but I don't think he's impressed with them either 😆 |
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By *rRiosMan 2 weeks ago
dublin |
"I don't engage in sex messages. There's one person I send the odd risqué message to, but I don't think he's impressed with them either 😆"
Maybe you’re not doing it right? Happy to be a proof reader to ensure you strike the perfect balance 🙃
In general, I find sexing contrived  |
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They are short! Think I’ve had dinners that last longer
Main reason … I’m OVER men not reading profiles, thinking they are entitled to meet straight away or just lack of manners!
I won’t even bother replying! Delete and move on! I have a very very very low tolerance level at the moment for it |
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