Just s little note
No i don't want a d*ck pic
There's nothing that i could want less
No woman wants to be accosted
By that thing between your legs
If you're honest you know it's not pretty
Hanging there all shrivilled and flaccid
Nestled amidst your bushes
All overgrown, twisted and matted
What makes you think its a greeting?
Or a fun way to say hello?
I should send it on to your mother
So she can see that little man's, little man didn't grow
Harsh, i know
But i didn't ask for a d*ck pic
Mate, I don't even know who you are
And you didn't bother to put a cape on it
Or teach it to play the guitar
So now your d*ck isn't special
It's not big and its certainly not clever
The first thing i thought when i looked at your pic?
"I bet that thing smells like Red Leicester"
I will never know
Because
I never asked for a d*ck pic
©️ Nia Speaks ( borrowed from)
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If the photograph is taken in the mirror and I call it a "Richard Reflection" would that make it more acceptable?
Maybe put a glove on it, with a nice scarf... 🧤🧣
I promise not to "put a ring on it"... 💍 |
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I dunno, I'm happy to enjoy a nice picture of any part of the female shape of the body.
Just saying. It makes my day brighter and better, especially when it drops into my inbox unexpectedly! I can feel a day added to my expiry date. |
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"
"I bet that thing smells like Red Leicester"
Sounds like the tittle of an Artic Monkeys song 👀
🤮
I bet you look good with the pants floored? "
*I bet you smell like cheddar when pants are floored?
*minor tweak and we have it 😊 |
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By *rRiosMan 2 weeks ago
dublin |
"
"I bet that thing smells like Red Leicester"
Sounds like the tittle of an Artic Monkeys song 👀
🤮
I bet you look good with the pants floored?
*I bet you smell like cheddar when pants are floored?
*minor tweak and we have it 😊"
Is that off the album Suck It and See?   |
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By *astelloWoman 2 weeks ago
Far far away |
If I wanted sausages, I'd go to Dennys,
All different types, I've rejected many,
I'd rather choose what appeals to me,
A dick pic hello, so not friendly,
So keep it under wraps, put it away,
Tempt me enough, perhaps I'll have the fry.
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By *rRiosMan 2 weeks ago
dublin |
"If I wanted sausages, I'd go to Dennys,
All different types, I've rejected many,
I'd rather choose what appeals to me,
A dick pic hello, so not friendly,
So keep it under wraps, put it away,
Tempt me enough, perhaps I'll have the fry.
"
If I wanted pussy, I’d cuddle Felix 
But sending dick pics is not in any way in my DNA, double helix |
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Well young lady, you should not generalise all penis's. That would be like me saying all vagina's are hairy and smell of fish. Clearly not the case.
My penis is well washed, shaven and circumcised ( cleaner as there is no place for bacteria or smegma to hide).
As for your your cheese (smegma), you obviously have been hanging out with some unhygienic people.
I will not be sending you any pic, let alone one of my prize penis.
Regards Rob
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"Well young lady, you should not generalise all penis's. That would be like me saying all vagina's are hairy and smell of fish. Clearly not the case.
My penis is well washed, shaven and circumcised ( cleaner as there is no place for bacteria or smegma to hide).
As for your your cheese (smegma), you obviously have been hanging out with some unhygienic people.
I will not be sending you any pic, let alone one of my prize penis.
Regards Rob
"
I took the poem from Fxxebook because it made me laugh
So not my aspirations or comments about cheesy dicks.
Its been nearly a year since I seen a dick in person |
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By *og-ManMan 2 weeks ago
somewhere |
"Well young lady, you should not generalise all penis's. That would be like me saying all vagina's are hairy and smell of fish. Clearly not the case.
My penis is well washed, shaven and circumcised ( cleaner as there is no place for bacteria or smegma to hide).
As for your your cheese (smegma), you obviously have been hanging out with some unhygienic people.
I will not be sending you any pic, let alone one of my prize penis.
Regards Rob
"
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I would be careful with the Red Leicester remarks OP. According to the legends, the original Queen Maedhbh was killed in an attack by her nephew Furbaide in revenge for Maedhbh's murder of his mother, Eithne, who was Maedhbh's sister.
Furbaide was an expert with the slingshot and when he slew the Queen of Connacht, while she was bathing in Lough Ree, he killed her with a piece of hard cheese 'taken from his pocket'! |
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"I would be careful with the Red Leicester remarks OP. According to the legends, the original Queen Maedhbh was killed in an attack by her nephew Furbaide in revenge for Maedhbh's murder of his mother, Eithne, who was Maedhbh's sister.
Furbaide was an expert with the slingshot and when he slew the Queen of Connacht, while she was bathing in Lough Ree, he killed her with a piece of hard cheese 'taken from his pocket'!"
What a way to die, death by cheese, hopefully a good block of cracker barrel cheese |
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