So far we've held on to all our messages because there were some great conversations where maybe we just couldn't get the logistics sorted or align our schedules, but we hope to at some point.
There does appear to be a momentum to messages that once lost they slip way down the message list.
Is it offensive to message someone out of the blue after period of time has passed? Do they take it as lack of interest full stop or accept that real life, medical issues, kids, work, elderly parents etc just make it tricky?
Or do we just clear the inbox, put up a status update when the stars align and we could have a timeslot for an initial coffee meet, then vet the new messages? |
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I don't see any issue with messaging someone where the momentum was lost if it was an interesting chat to start.
I'd hope the other person would be able to tell me directly if they no longer wanted to chat.
Also it's usually easy enough to notice if the interest is gone after a message or two |
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We wouldn't see the problem with messaging someone you have previously messaged as everyone has lives outside of the site and we think you should go ahead and message them the worst that can happen is a lack of reply |
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"If the messages stop I just figure not interested in meeting so I wouldn't bother reconmecting"
I appreciate that but if we'd already tried and suggested coffee meets and it didnt suit them. Nobody's fault. But neither can we message someone multiple times in a day in the off chance that in three weeks time a similar opportunity for us rolls around. So the intensity of back and forth messaging scales down and then next thing slows to a stop. A week or two passes by. Then we have a chance to do coffee. So if I contacted the person they think I'm cheeky maybe? |
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"If the messages stop I just figure not interested in meeting so I wouldn't bother reconmecting
I appreciate that but if we'd already tried and suggested coffee meets and it didnt suit them. Nobody's fault. But neither can we message someone multiple times in a day in the off chance that in three weeks time a similar opportunity for us rolls around. So the intensity of back and forth messaging scales down and then next thing slows to a stop. A week or two passes by. Then we have a chance to do coffee. So if I contacted the person they think I'm cheeky maybe?"
If a coffee meet was discussed ya I'd hope they reconnect as I dont agree to many coffee meets, however the last guy that messaged for a while and than agreed to meet for coffee ghosted me. |
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"If the messages stop I just figure not interested in meeting so I wouldn't bother reconmecting
I appreciate that but if we'd already tried and suggested coffee meets and it didnt suit them. Nobody's fault. But neither can we message someone multiple times in a day in the off chance that in three weeks time a similar opportunity for us rolls around. So the intensity of back and forth messaging scales down and then next thing slows to a stop. A week or two passes by. Then we have a chance to do coffee. So if I contacted the person they think I'm cheeky maybe?
If a coffee meet was discussed ya I'd hope they reconnect as I dont agree to many coffee meets, however the last guy that messaged for a while and than agreed to meet for coffee ghosted me. "
Yes it does seem to us that lots want to meet but to get straight to sex without the getting to know you part.
That's not going to be our style. Each to their own though. We'd have quality over quantity any day. |
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