... to a new partner about what you like and don't like?
Chat before hand about do's and don'ts?
In the moment will you say how you like to be touched what you want?
Or does it take a little time for you to be comfortable enough to share more intimate details about yourself? |
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"I don't like to be too prescriptive, how else would I find new things to enjoy 
However I'm careful to communicate red lines and conversely the things I particularly like (and similarly for them)."
I guess it depends on what you're looking for. If you're looking to try and explore new things then that's part of the communication that needs saying, but if you're looking for something in particular then it's best to speak up and make sure you're all aligned. |
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"Would you differentiate between say, critical info like do's and don'ts and intimate information like particular things that you might have a weakness/trigger for?"
For a vanilla fab meet I think it's important to talk about likes and dislikes, but if there is any kind of bsdm power exchange involved then additionally information like hard and soft limits and safe words are needed. |
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I don't like random conversations that are all transactional so for an initial meet any hard no's will be discussed on the day rather than before.
If that progresses to repeat meets then the conversation will be more open as trust builds.
When I first joined here I had a couple of conversations about my likes and dislikes that almost turned into a challenge for the other person so I don't go down that road now.
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Agree that the prescriptive do s and don'ts list can take some of the spontaneous lust out of the exchange. What about reading people's signals, body language and having an initial snog, touch, sexual encounter and then if you want to do something more daring or with more moving parts, discussing that.
For me, the more daring stuff should be discussed and boundaries understood. For first vanilla-ish encounters, I enjoy the flirt and reading people's signals.
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God no!! I don't ask the dos and don'ts.
I just blindfold them, tie them up, surprise them with multiple guys and "stop" means keep going!!
Wait a minute, doesn't that sound like non-consential??
You'd want to be mad not to discuss these things prior to any engagement with anyone!! |
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"... to a new partner about what you like and don't like?
Chat before hand about do's and don'ts?
In the moment will you say how you like to be touched what you want?
Or does it take a little time for you to be comfortable enough to share more intimate details about yourself?"
Definitely hard and fast dos and don'ts discussed beforehand...but intimate specifics for me come with time but also because too many specifics beforehand could limit the experience and not allow for an openness to try new things.  |
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"We wouldn't go in blind ever. There needs to be a conversation had beforehand. Compatibility is crucial "
I'm the same. I need open chats around expectations, needs, wants. Open communication is the key for me. |
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Open & honest communication is seriously important between 2 or more people. I'd personally mightn't be so forward on certain things at first. It's something I'll have to work going forward. If I can at all.  |
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