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Meeting soon-ish vs long chats
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It strikes me that, while prolonged pre-meet online interactions can be really helpful to establish a connection, they can also create unrealistic expectations and a false sense of intimacy (that doesn’t necessarily translate into a real life intimacy). Sometimes it seems the longer you chat the further things move away from reality… So, in your experience, is it better to move to social meet within a reasonable timeframe to check if its real or can prolonged online chat work well done right? |
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There's no one size fits all.
What works for me won't necessarily work for someone else.
A conversation between person A and person B could move at a completely different pace to one between A and C so one month could be the equivalent of a week with someone else.
I don't expect to meet everyone I chat to.
I don't expect to have sex with everyone I meet so intimacy in conversation is irrelevant. |
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Meet in person ASAP, you can flirt with a picture forever, and then meet and be like....... Eh, no thanks.
Orrrr you can be luke warm, meet for a coffee and then a drink or something more intimate and be like, hell yay, let's do this.
Person to person, it has to be done
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By *aelegoMan 26 weeks ago
Limerick |
"Meet in person ASAP, you can flirt with a picture forever, and then meet and be like....... Eh, no thanks.
Orrrr you can be luke warm, meet for a coffee and then a drink or something more intimate and be like, hell yay, let's do this.
Person to person, it has to be done
"
Does meeting randomly at a social count? |
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We don't really actively engage (answer messages etc) unless we are actively looking, so the prolonged text chitchat doesn't often happen. Once a "maybe" is found then a quick social is a lot more efficient than text ping ping. |
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In my experience going with momentum and meeting quickly (socially) once a connection has been established has been most effective for me. Prolonged chats are exactly that, drawn out and usually involves people who enjoy the attention but with no intention to follow through. |
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It depends. Recently I've had neither the time, energy, nor the inclination for prolonged chats, and if I were currently meeting, I'd be more in favour of moving to a social meet sooner rather than later |
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"Meet in person ASAP, you can flirt with a picture forever, and then meet and be like....... Eh, no thanks.
Orrrr you can be luke warm, meet for a coffee and then a drink or something more intimate and be like, hell yay, let's do this.
Person to person, it has to be done
Does meeting randomly at a social count?"
Yes! |
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By *ustBoWoman 26 weeks ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
When I am meeting I tend to chat for a while before I meet someone. I went against this and met someone within two days of chatting, and it turned out to be the worst and scariest social meet I've had. So never again will I meet that quickly off here.
I prefer to chat for a while and get to know someone plus I find they can't keep up a facade for too long if we chat for a bit.
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I love to build a connection and banter but after a while that gets frustrating...
Also agree that flirty messages don't always translate into chemistry and sometimes spontaneous meets with no messages result in a hot sexual connection.  |
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"Meet in person ASAP, you can flirt with a picture forever, and then meet and be like....... Eh, no thanks.
Orrrr you can be luke warm, meet for a coffee and then a drink or something more intimate and be like, hell yay, let's do this.
Person to person, it has to be done
"
Agree 100% |
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Some of my best meets have been with those who i had chatted for ages with before we finally got around to meeting in person due to one thing or the other getting in the way! Was chatting to himself for about year before we eventually got around to meeting! Angel  |
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